Thorin had to take a lot of time away from the forge in order to properly care for Fili. His golden maned son did not like being left alone locked in a house with his broken leg. He did not like wearing clothing. He hated having to wait for meals to be cooked and only ate half of the fruits and vegetables that Thorin provided him and that was only after Kili would come over and show him that it was okay to eat such things. He was blessed though, that Fili was a smart lad. He quickly caught on to the potty training concept. He did like bathing and didn't try to eat the soap after being told once.
Each day Thorin would give Fili positive touches on his shoulders, head and back, showing him that he was cared for. He would make an array of sounds encouraging the boy to mimic him. Sometimes it would end with Thorin having to pull a funny face which would earn him a smile and a few times a tiny laugh. Though the laugh always sounded weird as if the boy did not know what noise he was making.
By the time Fili's leg was healed he could speak and understand things fairly well. Kili was coming over every day and spending every night allowed by his parents to stay. On those nights Kili would curl up against Thorin's side and clutch tight to his beloved uncle while Fili wiggled around in furs trying to get comfortable. Eventually he came to the conclusion that Thorin's hair was the best fur to have so he would curl up around his father's head with the black hair draped over his tiny body. In the mornings Fili would say very few words to Thorin and would stay indoors with Kili who would try to help Fili get better at talking.
Then one morning, when Thorin had just closed the door to his little home he found Dis walking up with Kili holding onto her hand. The cold autumn air crip causing their breath to puff out in white clouds.
"Dis," Thorin pulled his sister into his arms. "You've put on weight."
She snorted. "No thanks to Vili. He keeps insisting I'm pregnant and feeding me more when I'm not."
"Good for him. A dwarrowdam should never be as thin as a human maiden." Thorin wrinkled his nose in disgust. Those women always looked unhealthy, like if they missed one meal they would fall over dead. Frailty was not something to be attracted to, at least, for him.
"Says you and most men, but you'd be surprised what dwarrowdams are told these days to make them believe that if they can't fit into a screw hole how undesirable they are."
"That's stupid." Thorin and Kili said at the same time causing Dis to laugh.
Thorin cleared his throat, silently berating himself for sounding like his tiny nephew. "What brings you here?"
"Well, I thought it was time I saw for myself this boy you have taken in. Word has it that you do not even call him your ward but your son."
"Mahal gifted him to me. Why would I not take him in as my son?" Thorin frowned. He didn't like the amusement in his sister's tone.
"I'm not saying anything of it brother, but I always thought you would die alone with no family to love you."
"Funny, I thought the same about you." He turned and opened his door, "Fili, come here."
"Yes?" Fili came up, favoring his other leg as his healed one still protested at times.
Thorin ran his hand over the back of Fili's head, "Say hello to your aunt, Kili's mother."
He looked to Dis, tilting his head. He wasn't sure what an aunt was or a mother. But he knew one thing, he didn't like her. He grabbed onto Thorin's pant leg with one hand, the other grabbed Kili's hand and yanked him close. He visibly curled his lip into a snarl and growled.
"Fili. What is the matter?" Thorin asked.
"W...where did you find him?"
The king looked to his sister. He was very confused, she looked struck, barely able to stand on her own two feet. Her eyes were wide and her breath was panting as she swallowed hard.
"In the forest-"
"Kili get away from him." Dis grabbed Kili's arm, pulling on him hard.
Kili gave a scream between protest and pain. Fili held onto the brunette, his hand swiping out leaving clawed marks through the thick material of her tunic.
"Foul thing," She spat, her hand snapping across Fili's cheek.
She was suddenly grabbed. Thorin had a fist full of her cloak, he pulled Kili away from her and shouted in a stern voice, "Fili, Kili, inside now!"
The two boys scuttled in quickly, Fili angry, Kili scared. Once they were inside Fili took Kili to a little spot between some creates and furs. They wiggled into the small space, hiding away from the shouts outside that caused Kili to wince. Fili only held him tight, his eyes sharp and protective.
"You struck my child." Thorin shoved his sister. If he didn't care about her he would have run her through by now.
"You don't understand!"
"No, you don't understand! He is mine and whatever you believe to justify your action is-"
"He's my first born!"
Thorin bared his teeth, "He was not harming Kili and he never would."
"Thorin! Fili is my first born!" Dis hissed.
"You lie. You had a miscarriage."
"Do I? Look at his face, look at his eyes, shaped and colored like mine and Vili's."
Thorin's brow came together. He felt a heaviness settle over his stomach. It was inevitable, their father went mad with grief, their grandfather had been sick in the mind. It ran in the family, one of them was to become ill.
"Go home Dis."
"Not without my son."
"You will not have Kili back."
Dis staggered on her feet. "What? You cannot-"
Thorin shouted now, loud and booming not caring who looked to him. "I will not endanger a child when you are not well!"
"You think I am mad?!" She pulled on the cuts on her sleeve. "Look what your beast did! Listen to me Thorin!"
"LEAVE!"
"No!"
"Then I shall remove you."
Thorin grabbed her by her wrists, she screamed for his son. Kicked at Thorin yelling for Kili's safety. Each kick, each yank in her struggle, every shout, it hurt Thorin. It was all too much like their father and grandfather, all too familiar. He would not let Fili and Kili be exposed to this, not like how he had been. They were much too young.
Eventually Dis became too much for Thorin to restrain, he had to enlist some help from a few dwarves that lived in the small village. A merry man that brought much of his ore by the name of Bofur and a friend of Balin's named Dori helped haul Dis to the healers where she was administered herbs that forced her to sleep. The three men took her back to her house where they put her to bed. Bofur ran off to find Vili while Dori quickly left to find Balin upon Thorin's request.
Thorin sat beside his sister and took her hand and held it tight. "I swear to you, I shall keep the children safe until you are well."
He brushed his thumb over the back of her hand as she slept. He felt crushed under the memories of his forefathers, of their madness that had infected his dear sister. And as she slept he tried to push the memories of her screams aside for ones of her running through Erebor with her chocolate brown hair trailing behind her as their father and mother tried to chase her down to give her a proper grooming. He tried to remember how she looked when she first started to lose her baby teeth. How she would pull on Frerin's hair when he would steal her practice bow.
"Thorin?"
He looked up finding Balin and Vili. He swallowed hard, taking a deep breath through his nose.
"What happened?" Vili asked still covered in the dust of the mines.
"She came to visit, to see my son for the first time and she..." Thorin put Dis' hand down and stood up allowing Vili to take his seat. "She struck him and acted with madness..."
The room fell silent. There was no secret to the insanity that plagued the line of Durin. They had just hoped the younger generations would be strong enough to not fall prey to it.
"Are the children safe?" Balin placed a hand on Thorin's shoulder.
"Yes. I... Vili, I do not think it safe for Kili to stay here."
Vili ran a dirty hand through his hair as he sighed. Since the miscarriage of their first child he had feared this day. "Please keep him. I would like to see him often though."
"Of course brother." Thorin patted Vili on the back. "Balin... I would ask of you to keep with her as you have the same experience as I with this. Unfortunately-"
"The children come first." Balin nodded. "Go to them, we shall take care of Dis."
Thorin gave his apologies and left.
The way back home seemed to have taken longer than before. His limbs feeling heavy and his eyes dry with the need to shed tears. With each step he took he silently prayed, not for him, not for Dis, but for Kili. If the madness could reach Kili's mother, who was so strong and full of life, it could reach the boy. He prayed over and over again to anything that could hear his thoughts that the child would never be touched by it.
When the king got home he opened the door only to have something slam into him. The weight and velocity sending him to the floor. It bit down hard. He shouted as a claw caught him in the chest. He raised his arm, the batting claw catching in his leather bracer.
"NO! FILI NO!"
Thorin pushed the creature off, Kili managed to scoot it back away from Thorin enough to wrap his arms around the neck of a large cat. Thorin was up on his elbows, eyes wide as he watched Kili stroke a golden lion cub. He nuzzled it softly.
"It's okay Fili, it's your daddy. He won't hurt you."
The startling blue eyes softened, the cub's body tensed. Thorin watched, all thought left him as skin twisted, bones popped and snapped. Fur was replaced with hair and before him was a shaking, naked, little boy. His little boy.
Scared blue eyes looked up to him. A tiny frightened voice reached his ears, "Udâd."