It wasn't hard for Kili to start to believe what Dis was telling him. His mother had never lied to him before and everyone called her sick when she was not coughing or sneezing. Being so young he could not grasp the concept of mental illness, so he put two and two together and got whatever number his mother told him to have. But he was rather certain of two things. One, Papa and Thorin did love him. Perhaps not in the same way as his mama did but they did love him. If they didn't then why would they hug and kiss him? Why would they make him smile and laugh? So they must love him. Right? Two, Fili, even though he was stupid and liked Ori more now, was not a wicked creature as his mother wanted him to believe. Fili even gave him a friendship kiss when he got home from visiting his mother.
But as time drew on the more he got to visit his mother, the more she got to whisper into his ear. And his certainty began to fray, the threads slowly breaking as he watched his family with her words in his head. Slowly, he started to believe that Fili really was lying to him about being his friend. Whatever Fili needed Thorin got him, so Thorin had to love Fili more than Kili. And that meant that Thorin didn't love Kili at all. Ori still got a lot of Fili's attention when Kili felt as if he should be the only one to get that attention. Thorin, Balin, and Papa even lied to him over and over again that his mama was sick.
"Why is Fili so dangerous?" Kili asked one day.
Dis tied her son's hair back. "Because he will end us all if he is allowed to."
"Why?"
Once Kili's hair was tied Dis spared a glance over at Balin who was taking a nap by the fire. The early spring rains had come and the storms brought with them the first aches to his aging bones as the rain tried to melt the high snow. She worried her lip between her teeth before getting up and ever so quietly slipped into her room. She brought back a very old book. It was not large and had strange handwriting inside that Kili did not recognize.
"Now, only the women of our family are supposed to know this," she whispered, sitting down and pulling Kili onto her lap. "But I will need your help if we are to help Fili."
"Why does he need help?"
"So that he doesn't hurt anyone." She opened the book. Thumbing through the old, crisp pages. "It is very important for the women of Durin not have a blond baby. Something very wicked could live inside him that will make him hurt other people so we have to make sure that he can't."
She flipped to a page with a strange drawing on it. It was of a lion wrapped in chains held by an elven hunter. The lion was attacking helpless dwarven women and children as they tried to scramble for safety. Kili whimpered at the frightening depiction as his mother spoke clear and calm. "He'll change and hurt so many. He'll kill them and eat them up."
"But-"
"You have to keep this a secret. So we can help him."
Kili felt his mother kiss his head then she was getting up and putting the book away. He watched her as she went around the home as if they had not talked at all.
All of this was so confusing to him but mama never lied. Which meant that Fili really was dangerous.
That night while the others slept on the floor again, next to the fire, Kili found he could not shut his eyes without seeing that horrible picture. He was scared to sleep. Fili could reach over at any moment and gobble him up. This fear, it was a terrible feeling.
A hand tangled in his hair causing him to stiffen. His breathing came in quick and fast. His fists clenched in front of his face as he squeezed his eyes shut.
He was going to get eaten.
A raspy tongue dragged over his cheek.
Mama was right! He was tasting him!
Fili was going to eat him!
He screamed. Shoved Fili's face away from him. His feet kicked Thorin in the side, his arms peddling back. He wasn't looking where he was going. His hand fell into coals, his sleeve caught fire. The shrill noise coming out of the little boy changed to a horrible pounding sound as he felt his skin start to cook.
Fili grabbed him, yanking him out of the fire. Large hands suddenly were on him, Thorin awakened by the screams. He ripped off Kili's tunic, the fabric landing on the floor where Thorin stomped it out. Within a blink of an eye he had Kili in his arms and out the door. He shoved Kili's burnt arm into the snow that was piled up against their home.
Thorin kept Kili's arm in the snow as he shouted at Fili, "Get a healer. Now!"
Fili quickly ran off to do what he was told.
Thorin's heart was hammering in his chest. He had to press himself into the snow as well to keep the crying boy in the cold. He tried to say soothing words but they all caught in his throat. Kili knew better! He knew the dangers of a fire, if not by being told then what had happened to Thorin in the forge.
"What were you doing?" Thorin managed to find his voice, it snapped and was harsh.
"F-fili-" Kili hiccuped through his tears. He couldn't feel his arm any more and the rest of his body was very cold. "-was gonna eat me!"
"Why would you think that?! Fili would never hurt you!"
"Ma-mama said so!"
Thorin's heart stopped. Dis... What had Dis been doing? Wasn't her visits with Kili chaperoned?
"What did you say?"
"Mama doesn't lie! She showed me in her book! Fili will eat me!" He sobbed harder. "I don't want to be eaten! He's supposed to be my friend!"
Thorin shook and not from the cold. He fell silent, taking Kili inside. He sat the boy at the table and lit a lantern. Soon Fili came back with a healer that was possibly as old as Balin. Thorin knew him from his own injury from the forge. Oin, he was a good sort and the best one to deal with burns.
He pulled off dead skin and lanced the larger boils. Thorin kept Fili from Kili, pulling the child to his side whenever the blond reached for the injured boy.
"And how did this happen?" Oin asked as he worked.
"Kili was scared, so I tried to comfort him so he could sleep." Fili grabbed one of Thorin's hands and set the palm on top of his head trying not to panic. He didn't understand why Kili was acting so strange of late. He didn't know what to do, and now he was burned. It made Fili's insides hurt like when Thorin had stopped being his udâd for those days long past.
"You were going to eat me!" Kili shouted in defense.
Oin gripped Kili tight while he tried to put salve on Kili's burns. "Do not move laddy."
"I would never eat you!" Fili yelled absolutely hurt that Kili would say such a thing.
"You were tasting me!"
"I was not!"
"Enough!" Thorin roared making the boys snap their mouths shut. "Kili. Fili would never try to eat you. Whatever your mother told you about Fili it is a lie."
"Mama doesn't lie to me like you do!"
The king felt as if he had been slapped. "I... lie to you?"
Kili had fat tears running down his cheeks again. He rubbed at his eyes as Oin wrapped up his arm in bandages. The healer professionally ignored the conversations knowing full well he had heard ten times worse before.
"Y-you don't love me like mama does." Kili sniffled. "You don't love me at all, just like papa."
Thorin didn't say anything. He only patted Fili on the head and quietly stepped out of the house. He didn't grab his cloak. He left his boots and if anyone saw him they would have sworn they saw a very angry, blue eyed demon stalking the night.