Sherlock and the Little People
By Doctor Napalm
Chapter 5
John Watson looked up from posting on his blog when the telephone rang. The caller ID showed it was Sherlock Holmes.
"Hello Sherlock," he said distractedly.
"I'm busy and need you to do some research for me right away," Sherlock ordered.
John sighed; his blog post would have to be put on hold. Sherlock would not give him a moment's peace unless he dropped everything and started work on whatever abstruse thing it was he needed this time.
"All right, what can I do for you?" he said in a resigned tone of voice.
"I need all the information you can locate on a confectioner; I have a partial name and some of the ingredients from one of their products from a piece of wrapper."
John loaded a notepad application on his laptop and prepared to type. "Go ahead with what you have," he said.
"The company name begins with Swee, S-W-E-E, and the ingredients include sugar, nougat, pistachios, artificial flavors, and…bacon. Nougat with bacon."
John could imagine the detective shuddering at the thought.
"The product name is Irish Rain-something. A green and silver colored wrapper," the detective continued.
John smiled. "That sounds like an Irish Rainbow," he said with a chuckle. "It's soft, mint-flavored nougat in a green and white-striped hard candy shell. I remember the bacon, and I believe it has coconut as well as pistachios in it also. The mother of one of my Yank friends sent them to him in Afghanistan regularly on the belief that they wouldn't melt as badly in the heat as chocolate would. He hated them but wouldn't tell her; always trying to give them away. Nasty little things, it has to be an acquired taste. I believe it's an American product, I've never seen them here in the UK."
"Wonderful!" said Sherlock, "contact the manufacturer for a list of distributors."
ɸ
Sherlock hung up without saying "thank you" or "goodbye," and turned to look at Molly.
"Regarding the injury to the back of the skull," he asked, "how severe was it?"
"The little fellow took a pretty hard wallop," Molly answered. She held up the x-ray film and examined it again. "It's difficult to judge exactly how hard from just an x-ray, but it was definitely a fatal blow."
"Could it have been a wooden club?" Sherlock asked.
"No, I don't think so. The fracture lines tend to indicate a round object rather than a club."
"How about a club with a large rounded knob on the end?" he asked again.
Molly looked again at the x-ray. "Well, yes, I suppose that might do it. It would have to be rather heavy, perhaps a kilo or so."
Sherlock turned to the microscope on the desk beside him and looked in the eyepiece. "I believe this small splinter of wood I found in the body bag may be from the murder weapon," he said. "An ancient Irish martial arts device made of Blackthorn wood with a high black polish."
"Martial arts?" Molly said. "I wasn't aware that the Irish were that well known for the martial arts."
"One of the traditional Irish walking sticks with a large rounded handle can be a formidable weapon," Sherlock explained. "A cudgel carved from the branch of a Blackthorn bush is coated with butter and placed in a chimney to cure for several months. The handle is sometimes hollowed out and filled with lead…they are quite deadly."
"A shillelagh? Oh, come off of it! Are you saying the leprechaun was killed with a shillelagh?"
Sherlock pursed his lips and then reluctantly answered, "Yes, that's another word for it."
ɸ
Sherlock opened the door to his flat and hung up his Belstaff coat. Taking of his scarf which he had carefully wrapped to hide most of his green face, he saw John Watson busy on the laptop.
"What did you find out about the sweets manufacturer, John?" he said.
John pressed a few more keys on the laptop then took a sheet of paper out of the printer tray. "Is this it?" he asked, holding it up for Sherlock to see.
On the paper was a picture of a green and silver wrapper labeled "Irish Rainbow." Above the picture appeared the slogan "TASTE THE RAINBOW, ITS BACON!"
"Yes," Sherlock said with a disgusted tone of voice, "that's it."
"Sweeney and Sons, a third generation, privately-owned company in upstate New York," John continued. "I was correct. It's an American product, which sort of explains the strange combination of ingredients. They tend to put bacon in everything and think it tastes good. Sweeney has been making Irish Rainbows for over a hundred years, but they only became tremendously popular about ten years ago."
"Go on…"
"It seems some Hollywood star mentioned he liked them on a late night talk show and their sales shot through the roof the next day. They still can't make enough of them."
"Available in the UK?" asked Sherlock.
"Not exactly."
"What, exactly?"
"It's just a small six person operation. No distributors or agents whatsoever. But they do take orders for their products over the Internet. I spoke with the owner and he confirmed that they shipped an order for three hundred bars to an address in London less than a month ago."
"Excellent work, Watson! You have the address?"
"Yes, it's a pub just a few blocks from where they found the leprechaun."