mgowriter's note: Thank you to all who have taken the time to read this story! I really enjoyed exploring the possibilities of Bill and Frank's lives before the game.

10. Words into Ashes

I was dead the first time you saw me. If the infected didn't get me, I would've frozen to death that night. You saved me and gave me a place to sleep. Because of that, I'll always owe you my life.

I never told you this, but I fell in love with you the next morning. You're not my type. I would've never dated you before or even after the infection. But when you stuck your neck out and said I could stay that morning, I saw a side of you that nobody else gets to see, and like a fucking middle school teenaged girl, I fell completely and totally in love.

I was so fucking nervous that first night we kissed. We drank the entire bottle of scotch and I wanted to throw up and rip off your clothes at the same time. I finally got up the courage to go to your room, and when I looked down at you with the moon and the stars shining through the window, you were the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Reading that last sentence is going to embarrass you, so forget I wrote it. But I still slept better that night than any other since the world started going to shit.

We hardly ever fought, but when we did it was about one thing. I wanted to know what was out there, and you didn't. You wanted to protect us from the rest of the world. Case in point: the military truck that crashed into the school. God, what a fucking sore subject that was. Remember that night with the huge thunderstorm a couple of springs ago? I never told you the whole story, but I got this close to turning into dinner for a bunch of clickers. That scared the shit out of me, and I vowed to stay away from the school, until now.

I see your point in wanting to stay in Lincoln. We've made it safe for ourselves. We have enough to eat, a roof over our heads, and firewood to keep us warm. When you go to Boston every month, I worry my head off about all the horrible things that could happen to you on the road. That time when Tess came down to trade for explosives…it revealed the quarantine zone had its problems, too, but goddammit Bill, how can you be okay with living like this for the rest of your life?

You know what I find the most infuriating about you? The fact that no matter how hard we fight or how long we're mad at each other, you always find a way to make it better, and in the process make me love you more. The church…was the best thing anyone's ever done for me. I know you didn't want to move. Thinking about it now, it was probably a really bad idea. All those windows, the open space…probably the easiest area to get overtaken if a horde of infected made its way inside. But when we sat out there the first night and watched that perfect sunset, I really thought that this was it. I could stay here with you and be happy. And when you took care of me in that bedroom every time I was sick…pretty much made it impossible not to love you more.

In the end, there's one thing that I don't think I'll ever understand. When those two men turned up on the edge of town, they were exhausted and looked about ready to give up. I know they had guns, but everybody has guns. They weren't military, and they weren't Fireflies. They were regular people, like you and me, who needed help. I think you would've helped them if I wasn't there. You were thinking about protecting me, and I love you for that, but we can't live in a world where it's every man for himself. What kind of world is that? I have to believe there's something better out there, small communities maybe, rebuilding civilization in some way. I can't live every day just to survive. There has to be something else. Otherwise, what's the point?

That's why I've decided to go to the school, to get the battery out of the truck. I'm going to rig a car and find a place where we can live a normal life again. It's out there. I know it. And when I do, I'm coming back for you. It's also why I can't give you this letter. Because you'll come after me, and if it's as dangerous as I think, then I might not even make it out of town. Better me dead than the both of us. I'm just living on borrowed time anyway.

If you ever find me turned, put a bullet straight between my eyes. If you find me dead, forget me and move on. Find something to live for.

Goodbye, Bill. I love you and always will.

. . .

Frank set the pen down with shaking hands. He stared at the letter for a long time, even though the decision had been made before he wrote it. Finally, he took out a match, struck it against the side of the box, and watched the small white ball at the opposite end burst into flame.

The letter caught on fire quickly. Its edges curled away from the flame and turned into ash. Frank dropped what was left of the paper, stomping out the last of the embers with his foot. He surveyed the room he shared with Bill, hoisted the heavy backpack onto his shoulders, and walked past the stained glass windows of the church for the last time.