Chapter Eight: We're Not Gonna Fall
Santana woke up frustrated. The kids were at Brittany's sister's, so she could have practice with the kids. She and Brittany should be enjoying time alone. Blaine was there. She was going to go and talk to Kurt. Get him to forgive Blaine. Santana didn't regret asking Blaine to stay, but she wanted some alone time with Brittany. Santana wanted Blaine to go home. She wanted life with her wife back. She rode the subway to Kurt and Blaine's apartment. She would get Kurt to forgive him no matter what she had to do. She buzzed to be let up, humming Girl On Fire under her breath. She hoped Kurt would get to the door quickly. It was a little chilly out here. She didn't have to wait long, Kurt was soon opening the door. She gave him a small grin. "I'm here to talk about Blaine. And before you say no, please hear me out." Santana said, and he sighed, letting her in. Santana hadn't really thought about what she would say. Her plan was to get across how Blaine was very sorry. Santana usually didn't have to worry about the words she needed for things. She could talk her way out of or into anything. "So, Blaine is so very sorry." She said.
Kurt did his best not to snap at Santana when she said that. He knew she was trying to be helpful. There was some way that this was benefitting her, Kurt knew her well. He just wasn't sure what it was yet. He looked at Santana, not sure what to say. Kurt wasn't ready to forgive Blaine just yet. If he was being honest with himself, he did miss Blaine. A lot. He really wished he could forgive Blaine. He just couldn't right now. Kurt got out a water from the fridge and handed it to her. She took it. Kurt looked at her, sighing. "Santana, I appreciate you trying to help, but I'm not ready to forgive Blaine. He kissed someone else. We're married. I don't know that I can just forgive him right now." He ran his fingers nonchalantly through his hair. He didn't want to live the rest of his life without Blaine, he really didn't. He just couldn't trust Blaine right now. "I appreciate you being concerned. Even if I know that it's somewhat selfish." Kurt replied. She didn't deny that, and he just gave her a slight smile. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have plans." Not big ones, he was just going to watch movies. Not that he was going to tell her that.
"Look, I know it's not ideal. I can't even begin to fathom what I would do if it was Brittany." Santana said. She really didn't know how that would make her feel. Pissed off, for one thing. She didn't have much in this world, but she had Brittany. She had never had to question about how Brittany felt about her. It was obvious. "I know that you don't really like me. That's okay. You don't have to. I just, I need Blaine out of my house, and I can't tell him to leave. It's not that I want him out on the street, but I don't get enough time with B. She's my wife. Just talk to him. I know that you can't just forgive him overnight. I am not asking for that. What I am asking for is to just talk to him. He's so sorry. I know it doesn't mean anything coming from me." Santana didn't know if anything she was saying was getting through. She just hoped it was.
Most of what she said made sense. Kurt knew that. It just wasn't making him feel any better. He wanted to just stay in his fox hole a little while longer. He wanted to have some more time to think. Kurt let out a sigh. "Santana, I know that you are trying to help, however selfish your reasons may be, but I am not ready to talk to him about this." Kurt replied, actually tapping his foot. He hadn't done that in such a long time. He ran his hand through his hair again. This time it stuck up. He went to the kitchen and got out some of the ice cream he'd bought. It was Blaine's favorite. He couldn't go without it. Kurt missed him sitting all over the apartment, eating it out of the carton and complaining about it being too cold. It was just so adorable. Kurt missed it so much. "I just need some time, Santana." He really didn't know why anyone wouldn't stop bugging him. Kurt was the wronged party.
There weren't the right words in her brain, apparently. Santana took a deep breath and followed him. She let out another breath, her mind racing a mile a minute. Santana was not used to not getting her way. She had to fix this and get her life back. That's all she wanted. "Kurt, please. You guys don't have kids, so you don't know what it's like needing time with your spouse." Santana really wished that she could get him to understand. "Please, Kurt. I am begging you." Santana said, a lock of her black hair falling over her eye. She didn't really have a plan, and that's what was tripping her up. She really was running out of ways to get this to happen. "Please. Just talk to him." She tried imploring. She supposed that she should want to help him because his marriage was imploding and not because she was selfish. She didn't often do things for other people. It was one of the reasons that she should get along with Berry, since she was selfish, too. They didn't though, they butted heads a lot. "He's been writing songs, and all of them are about you." The best part was that that was true.
"Santana, I am sure that's true. Blaine's songs are almost always about me." Kurt replied. He wanted to hear them now. He couldn't help it. He loved Blaine's voice. He always had. It was amazing how good he was. Kurt didn't know where he got it from, Cooper was Blaine's brother and not his father. Kurt hadn't seen Cooper very often, because Blaine didn't like his brother. Kurt really thought that Blaine was being very stubborn. Blaine was the one who wasn't wanting to forgive Cooper. Kurt didn't really get why. But he respected his decision because he loved Blaine. He did. Tears brushed Kurt's eyes as he took a bite of the ice cream. Maybe he should talk to Blaine. He did miss him so much. "I do miss him, I do." He admitted. He looked at Santana. "Do not get your hopes up, Lopez." He said. He didn't want her to expect miracles. "I did not say that I was ready to forgive him. I said I miss him." Kurt really wished that he had the strength to talk to Blaine. He just wasn't sure that he did.
The door to the apartment was open. The spring was here, and it was very hot. Puck was making sandwiches and salad, because it was too hot to cook anything. Sarah was busy making iced tea. They hadn't talked about their grandmother for awhile. Puck really didn't know what to do. He had never really thought that Nana Connie would be that way. Puck was wrestling with the decision to call her and yell at her for hurting Sarah. Puck put the mayonnaise on the bread. He'd mad blts because all it took was doing the bacon for a few seconds in the microwave. They got ready made bacon, since technically they weren't supposed to eat them. Puck couldn't help it, he knew Quinn liked bacon. She would eat it every day if he let her. When she wasn't eating fruit and whatnot. Sarah finished the tea and put some ice in it to get it cold faster. Quinn came out of the bedroom, showered and changed. It was a very beautiful day. Puck ran his hand over his head. It was time to shave his head again, his hair was getting too long.
Quinn grabbed a piece of bacon off the plate. "Sarah, have you thought about getting a job?" She asked. Sarah made a face. "I don't think you have to decide right away, but you could at least try to find something. It doesn't have to be a career or anything." She wasn't trying to pressure Sarah, but she really thought that it might make Sarah feel better if she had something to do. She had been moping around the apartment. "Maybe we should go somewhere so you can meet someone." She said. Quinn thought Sarah should get out there. "You have to get out there and meet people. You'll never be comfortable with being out if you don't get out there." Quinn said, scratching her face. All she really wanted was to make sure that Sarah was happy. Not that she really knew what it was like to be gay. She didn't. It seemed to be different for everyone. Quinn thought that she probably would have a hard time with it because of her religion.
That really terrified her. Sarah wasn't ready to go out and meet someone. She was fine with getting a job, though. She already had one, actually. "I've got one. I'm working at a diner right down the street." Sarah said. She was glad that she'd picked a diner. It was kitschy and cute. "It's a fifties retro thing." Sarah got out sandwich plates and some salad bowls. "I start in two days. What else do you want to pressure me to do?" She asked, sarcastically. Puck gave her a look. She looked back at him, eyebrow raised. She didn't know why her was looking at her like that. She really didn't think Quinn should make such a big deal. "I know what a big deal being gay is, seeing as I am the one who's gay." Sarah said, folding her arms, long hair falling over her eye. This was not the way she had expected her life going, but it's not like she could change it. She really couldn't. You couldn't help who you were attracted to. Sarah had already had a fling with a girl. She had lost her virginity to her. Sarah didn't regret it. What she did regret was telling her grandmother. Sarah hadn't wanted to lie anymore, but she could have held it in. Now everything was all messed up.
Puck put lunch on the table. "Sarah, Quinn is really not trying to be a bitch. You need to get your panties out of a twist." He still couldn't figure out how his sister had ended up gay. Not that there was anything wrong with that. It was just a blow, but all he wanted was for Sarah to be happy. He just wasn't sure what he could do to help her. He just wasn't able to empathize with her because he had no idea how she was feeling. Puck got glasses for the ice tea. He was hungry. "Let's eat." He said, changing the subject. He looked at Quinn. "You feeling okay today?" Puck wondered if she was ready to start having kids. Things had been really good with them lately. He knew she didn't have all her memories back, but they might not ever come back, and she didn't have to have them back to have a baby. He was actually looking forward to it. Puck took a bite of his sandwich. That was so good, he didn't care if it had bacon on it or not.
"I'm fine, babe." Quinn said, once her mouth was free of sandwich. She spread some dressing on her salad. She mixed it up on all the lettuce. "It's so hot." She said, looking outside. She was glad, though, because that made winter gone for awhile. It had not been a good winter for them. They didn't really have much of a plan. She wondered what he was thinking. He was being pretty quiet. She didn't really know what to say. She felt some tension because of the whole situation. Things were weird with Puck and Sarah since she had come out. Quinn didn't know why, Puck didn't care if Sarah was gay. She could tell how much he loved his sister. Quinn had never had a very close relationship with her own sister. Frannie was quite a bit older than her. They hadn't been in the house together long. Quinn was very jealous of Frannie. Frannie was the cherished older daughter. She had never been able to measure up. Quinn didn't really know why. She had stopped trying to get her parents' approval. Quinn didn't think she would ever get her parents' approval. Not like Frannie did.
Boy, Quinn was really captain obvious right now. Sarah didn't know how she was managing right now. All she really cared about was getting on with her life. She just didn't know exactly how to do that yet. She concentrated on her food. She didn't really plan things out, she never really had. Especially after they lost their mother. Sarah wondered what she would have said if she'd been alive to find out about Sarah. She would like to think that her mother would have accepted her. Sarah didn't know if she could handle if it would have been no. Sarah was sure that she wouldn't have been really pleased, but she had loved both of her children, and she might have accepted it. She had always liked Quinn. Ruth Puckerman had always been of the mind that Noah wouldn't get married, because he wouldn't settle down long enough.
Quinn could feel the tension. She didn't really know how to make either one of them at ease. Quinn wasn't sure how she would feel if that was her, and she was gay. Quinn had never even thought that she might be. Quinn had always been into boys. The first boyfriend she had had been when she was 14, and it hadn't lasted a long time. His name had been Sam Evans. She thought that he was cute, but he had just been a distraction from Jesse. She and Jesse had known each other their whole lives. Quinn hadn't really started to see him as someone that she could be with until her sophomore year of high school. She didn't really know how she could have ever thought that she could marry him. He wasn't a completely bad person, but it was completely laughable to her now that she was with Puck. She hoped that nothing else was going to go wrong with them. She knew that this all had been hard on him. Quinn didn't want to hurt him again. She ate some of her salad. "I'm sorry if I upset you, Sarah." Quinn said, trying to help her feel better.
Puck wasn't really listening anymore, he was busy thinking. He was thinking about how to get Kurt and Blaine back together. He didn't really know how to do it. It was getting ridiculous. He was ready to release Blaine's album though. He had them distributed to the stores already. Puck thought it was worth the wait. It was really good. She had been right, Santana, to sign him. Puck thought Blaine was really going to put the label on the map. He was very proud of the work they'd done. Puck just wanted to make sure Blaine was going to be okay, and he knew that if he didn't get Kurt back, he wouldn't be. He didn't know how to get Kurt to agree. Puck knew that Kurt still loved him. He would have to talk to Kurt. He wanted to know where his head was. Puck also had to do some work on his own album. He had been writing like crazy. He had quite a few lyrics finished, and he was trying to get the music worked out. He didn't know what he wanted his songs to sound like. He just wanted them to be great. And if he had his way, it would be.
A couple of days later, Kurt was sitting in the living room, toying with his phone. He finally picked up his phone, and dialed Blaine. He was finally going to call him so they could talk. Kurt did miss him. He really did. Kurt listened to the ring back, which was Bills, Bills, Bills by Destiny's Child. Blaine had told Kurt that he'd sang it in high school. Kurt was thinking about that when Blaine picked up. His hello told Kurt that he'd answered without thinking. Blaine sounded miserable. That felt okay, Blaine was at least not happy without him. Kurt said, "Blaine, it's me." He had almost called him honey. Kurt missed him so much, he missed the back and forth between them. He missed him being in the bed with him. Kurt just missed everything about Blaine right now. He was wary, but he knew that they had to figure this all out. Kurt didn't want to throw all that they had away.
When Blaine heard Kurt's voice, he started to cry. He was too happy. Blaine was lying on the spare bed in the room he was staying in. He had been reading. Blaine didn't know why Kurt was calling but right now he didn't care. All he cared about was that Kurt had called him. "Oh, baby. I'm so glad you called." He said. Blaine ran his hand through his curls, which needed cut. He hadn't been feeling like he could go and do things like that. He knew he should, there were photo shoots coming up for the album and things. Blaine was so glad he was finally talking to Kurt. "What…. what do you need?" He asked, afraid that he had just called to deal with divorce papers or something. Blaine didn't want that. All he wanted was to work things out. Blaine could not believe how stupid he had been with kissing someone else. He had never thought that he would do something like that to Kurt. He had never cheated on anyone before.
That was a sound Kurt had missed, was Blaine's voice. Hearing the tears in Blaine's voice made tears to come to Kurt's own eyes. He didn't really know where he should start exactly. He wiped his eyes with a tissue. "Blaine, I want to talk about us. I…. I've been trying to hide from it since you told me. I just, I didn't want to believe that you would do that to me. I didn't want to believe that you would hurt me like that." Kurt took a deep breath and wiped his eyes again. He didn't really know what else to say. He wanted to get across to him that he still wasn't sure what he was feeling about the whole thing. But Kurt was ultimately wanting to work things out. Kurt had loved him so much. He settled back on the couch. "You should know Santana came over here to talk you up. She told me that I should at least just talk to you. You have at least one person in your corner." Kurt took a sip of his coffee. He was trying to decide if he should tell Blaine to come home. It might make things easier on Santana and Brittany and their kids. Kurt love their children, even if he wasn't sure if he wanted them himself.
Blaine wiped his eyes. He was just so glad that Kurt had called him. He was glad that Kurt wanted to work things out. "I am glad she did. But I want you to forgive me because you want to, not because someone else told you that you should. I want us to work it out for us." He didn't really know what else to say. Blaine almost wanted to kick his own ass for even saying that to begin with. Blaine wanted him back almost more than he wanted anything else. "I do want to work things out with you. Very much so." Blaine said, as he got up to get some coffee. He was the only one home. He didn't know what to say that would convince Kurt. "You know how sorry I am. If I could take it back I would. But I can't. I can't believe I was dumb enough to hurt you like that. I will never do it again. All I want is you. I will never again do anything that will jeopardize my relationship with you."
Kurt listened to it all. He hoped that Blaine meant all of that. He really did. "Why don't you come home?" He found himself asking. He didn't regret it at all, it was the right thing to do. Kurt let out a breath. "Before you ask, I really mean that. You should come home. We have to fix this. We can't just go on without talking. I can't imagine my life without you in it." Kurt meant it. He didn't want to spend the rest of his life without Blaine. He just couldn't. Kurt didn't know how he had made it through his life before Blaine. He had such a better life with Blaine than he did without him. Kurt just hoped that Blaine really did mean what he said about not wanting to cheat on him again. "I want to be able to trust you. I want to be able to know that you're not going to hurt me again." Kurt let out a breath as he waited for Blaine's reply. He didn't like that they were in this position. He couldn't stop himself from still hating this. Kurt wiped his eyes. "I still love you, Blaine. I don't want to live without you for the rest of my life."
That was more than Blaine had expected to hear. But he was very glad. Blaine wanted nothing more than to be with him. Blaine wiped his eyes. "I want you to be able to trust me, too." Blaine could not believe that Kurt had asked him to come back home. Blaine definitely wanted to. He said, "And if you really want me to come back home, I will." Blaine could not believe his luck. He would never be so stupid again. "I can be there in just a little while." He was thinking about all the things he had to pack. It wasn't much, he'd left most of his things still at the apartment. He had been hoping that Kurt would ask him to come back home. He so wanted to. "Is it alright if I come back home right now?" He asked, hoping it was yes. Blaine would have to do something for Santana and Brittany for letting him stay at the house. He would take them out to dinner or something. Blaine could not be more grateful for everything that his friends had done for him.
Kurt smiled and laughed a little. "Yes. You can come now. Pick up something for dinner on the way, will you?" He asked. Kurt didn't feel like cooking. He hoped Blaine felt like Chinese food. It sounded really good. "Get some Chinese if you would. I am dying for some sesame chicken." He said. He didn't regret this at all. This was the right thing to do. He felt better than he had in months. Kurt was ready to move on, fix things with Blaine. He had missed him so much. Without him, things just looked like a crayon scribble. He would have to get showered and cleaned up a little, not that Blaine cared about that. He didn't. Kurt wanted to though. He said, "I love you, Blaine. I really do. We can get past this." He said, running his hand through his hair. Kurt was very excited at the prospect of having Blaine home. They could work through this together. Kurt wanted to come to a compromise about kids and whatever else. Kurt didn't want to lose Blaine. As long as they could come to a compromise, he'd be fine. They could work it all out and nothing else would happen.
Chinese food sounded amazing. Blaine got up, to start packing. He wanted to go home so very much. He said, "I'll stop for Chinese. I am getting hungry myself." Blaine started packing up his clothes and whatnot. He would take a cab, he didn't have a car. But he didn't want to take the subway. He didn't feel like lugging his bags and the food. He said, "I love you, too, Kurt. More than anything. We can work this out. I'll be home soon." They said they loved each other once more and hung up. Blaine packed his things, going as quickly as he could. It was hotter than hell outside. Spring was finally here. Blaine was so glad to be going back to his apartment. He never imagined that he would get Kurt back after what he had done. Blaine packed as quickly as he could. He had condoms and lube, although he and Kurt hadn't used condoms in a long time. Blaine had just wanted to be on the safe side. It was better to be safe than sorry. He had always thought that was the best way to be. And now his got his life back. That was the most important thing.
The next morning, Quinn was sitting in the bathroom, waiting for the pregnancy test to declare whether she was or not. Quinn had gone off birth control a long time ago. And she and Puck were back on track, and they hadn't used condoms in a very long time. It was a possibility. He would be happy, Quinn knew that. After all they had been through, Quinn wasn't sure what she wanted it to be. She couldn't be happier right now, she and Puck were on the right track. Quinn loved him, whether she had her memories or not. She wasn't going to hurt him anymore. She loved him more than she had ever loved anyone. She couldn't imagine that she would love him more if she had her memories back. It was finally going okay. A baby might mess that up. Quinn wasn't going to get rid of a baby that was finally Puck's though. Not after she had lost two that weren't his. Although maybe that was God telling her that she wasn't supposed to have a baby with someone who wasn't Puck. She would never turn down making him happy. The timer went off, and she got up and went to look. It was positive. Quinn let out a breath. This would be a good thing.
The front door closed, bringing Puck. He called out. "Quinn, you home, babe?" He had just come home from a meeting about Blaine going on tour. They had not needed Blaine to talk about it because they hadn't firmed up any details yet. They decided it could wait a few months, let Blaine get back to things with Kurt. He knew that they were back on track, Blaine had texted him. Puck was glad. Blaine and Kurt deserved to be happy. Puck put down his keys on the table in the kitchen. He headed in the bedroom. He heard Quinn in the bathroom. He went inside. He saw Quinn put the test on the counter. Puck's eyes widened. Quinn was pregnant? Puck couldn't help but be happy. Things were going so good for them. Puck thought that a baby would just cement things. He looked at her. "Are you pregnant, babe?" Puck nodded towards the test on the counter.
Quinn held up the test, showing it to him. "Yes. I'm pregnant." She said, unable to keep the smile off her face. She would make an appointment to see the doctor. She wanted to make sure that there wasn't going to be a problem. She wasn't going to lose another baby. "I am very happy that we're going to have a family. And I'm sure our friends' kids will be glad to have a new little cousin." She knew that he would know she was mostly talking about Brittany and Santana's kids. Quinn wanted to make sure that Puck knew she was still fine with him having kids that weren't hers. Even if he was just Uncle Puck. Quinn ran her hands over her flat stomach. She was so happy. There was nothing that could ruin this moment. She took Puck's hand with her other. She laced her fingers with his. She lifted her hazel eyes to his. She loved him no matter what. "We are going to have out own little miracle." Quinn said, as she leaned up to kiss him deeply. He kissed back. Quinn wrapped her arms around his neck. She was so happy to be with him. "I am so happy that we are having a baby."
Puck didn't know what to say first. He was very happy. That was a given. Puck had never thought that he would have kids of his own. The ones he'd helped Santana have he had given up all parental rights to. He didn't mind that at all. Puck had known that he and Quinn had lots of chances to have their own. Puck knew it would be hard for Brittany and Santana without him. Puck also knew how much Santana disliked most people. She would have had a hard time finding someone else she wanted to be the donor. Puck put his arms around her waist. "I love you, and I am going to love our baby." Puck said, nodding. He stroked her back, his heart pounding. He was really nervous. It was a big thing, raising a kid. Puck was looking forward to it. He was hoping that it was a boy, most because he thought it would be easier to raise a boy than it was a girl. Puck would probably kill somebody the first time they hit on his daughter. He couldn't imagine feeling closer to Quinn right now.
The buzzer for the door went off. Sarah wasn't home, she was at her new job. Quinn reluctantly let go to find out who was at the door. She didn't know if she really cared. It's not like she wanted to see anyone anyway. She would rather just be with Puck. They had just gotten amazing news. She went to the door and opened it. It was Rachel. Quinn looked at her, and tried to assess what was wrong with her. Why she might have come over. Quinn didn't even like her and Rachel knew that. Quinn then noticed she had a large folder in her hands. Quinn didn't want to let her in, but she knew how close Rachel and Puck were, so she stepped back. "What are you doing here?" She asked as diplomatically as she could. She knew that Rachel had had a crush on Puck in high school for five minutes and it was completely unacceptable. Quinn didn't want her around Puck at all. She hated Rachel. She didn't want her in the apartment. "You can get to the point at any time. I don't want you here, and Puck and I just got wonderful news, and we'd like to celebrate."
Rachel had thought that Quinn would drop her hating thing when she had lost her memories. Rachel wished she could change her mind. She didn't want Quinn to keep on hating her. It was out of her hands. She didn't want Quinn to hate her forever. Rachel had a big favor to ask. "I have a big favor I'd like to ask of you two. Finn and I are taking a weekend vacation, and I was hoping that you guys wouldn't mind watching the kids for me. As you know, Finn's and my parents are all in Ohio and I don't want to schlepp the kids there for them to babysit." She didn't know if it was the best idea to ask them, but she already had. "I think the kids would really like it. They love getting to spend time with the both of you." Rachel could see Noah was into it. That was a good sign. Rachel knew Quinn was going to want to say no. Rachel just hoped that she'd look past that instinct and say yes. She needed time with Finn, badly.
Quinn and Puck shared a look. Quinn wanted to say no. She didn't want to watch the Hudson brats all weekend. However, it would be good practice. Maybe they should. She could have a real opportunity to see how Puck acted around kids. Quinn knew they had three kids, and Tyler was the baby. Will and Carolyn were the older ones. Will was seven, and Carolyn was five. Quinn hadn't spent much time with them since she had lost her memories. "Will, Carolyn, and Tyler, right?" She asked, and Rachel nodded. Quinn nodded, glad that she had known that at least. She went to start the coffee pot. She wasn't planning on asking Rachel if she wanted any. She was making it for Puck, she couldn't have any. Quinn was pretty curious about how this weekend would go. She didn't know how bratty their kids were. "Does Tyler sleep through the night?" She asked, doing her best to keep her tone casual. Quinn reached into the fridge, getting out the creamer. She put it on the counter. Maybe she should cook for Puck. Maybe he was hungry. She liked cooking for him. It was very relaxing. She looked at Rachel. "We can watch the kids." She agreed.
Well, besides the apocalypse happening because of Quinn agreeing to help Rachel, Puck was glad. He liked being around kids, especially Finn and Rachel's. They thought he was funny. Puck watched his wife move around the kitchen. "I guess we're watching the kids." He said, running his hand over his head. He got out a coffee mug for himself and one for Rachel. He knew Quinn wouldn't offer. It was up to him. He sat down at the island. "We've got you covered, Rachel." He said. Puck watched the coffee maker percolate. This was going to be a very interesting weekend. He knew Quinn was using it to see how he would be with kids. It was fine with him. He was going to have his own little baby. He could die happy.
Author's note: I hope ya'll liked! I hope I'll have another update soon. XD.