Ch. 3 Whirlwind

Kate pulled up to the hospital and froze just outside the entrance. This was the same hospital her dad had died in, the same hospital she was taken to after being attacked, and now Rick was here. She tried to make her feet go.

What should I be afraid of, she thought. But she knew. She was scared because she didn't know what shape he was in. She didn't even know what happened to him. Unsure of what shape he was in, she was going in blind. She knew he needed her and she needed him just as much. She forced herself to get inside and when she told them his name, she was scared when they took her to ICU. The nurse asked her who she was and she flashed her badge.

"I don't know much help he will be. He is out of it."

"I still want to see him." The next thought she had when she was following another nurse was, Alexis. "Did someone tell his sister he was here?"

"Not that I know of." The nurse brought her up to his room and Kate froze again. "Are you going to go in?"

Kate nodded and slowly stepped through the entranceway. Her heart plummeted and she was ready to throw up.

"Take all the time you want." Once again, all Kate could do was nod.

Kate walked up to him and she saw all the cords. That and his face was bruised and swollen. The ventilator tube in his mouth almost made her fall. She sat down knowing all he would need is to find out something had happened to her. The heart monitor beeped showing that he was still alive. She saw his hand amongst all the cords and she reached for it. She rubbed her thumb along the back of his hand and she then squeezed.

She flashed back to the time where she sat by her dad's side and held his hand, the same hand, his right. To be in this position was causing her to panic. She tried to slow her breathing down. She rubbed his arm and cried. It was all she could do to not fall apart.

"Rick? It's Kate. I am not sure how much you can hear. I would have come sooner but I was driving and then time slipped away. I should have been here sooner. I am so sorry." Kate's chest heaved with every cry. She didn't know what she could do. She couldn't take time back. That's why they call it the past. She wanted to make sure Alexis knew what was going on so she decided to place a few calls. "Rick? I'll be right back. I have to call Alexis and the precinct. I am staying tonight." She kissed his cheek because that was all she could reach.

Once she was back out in the hallway, she slid her phone out of her pocket. She called the precinct first because it would be a faster call.

"Captain? I have a strange request."

"I already know what is going on. The boys filled me in. Is he ok?"

"I am not sure. He is hooked up to all these tubes and…"

"You need to stay with him."

"I was just about to ask if I could. Are you sure it's ok?"

"Kate, if I was you, that is where I would be. Don't sweat it. Call me if anything changes."

"Thank you." Kate stopped and was far away from the ICU. She had been walking the entire time and was just grateful for the chance to stay. She quickly dialed Alexis next.

"Hey Kate. It's been a little while. Are we still on for the movies next week or are you calling to cancel? It's ok if you want to cancel. I understand but I just need to make sure. Are you going to because I'll be ok. Kate?"

"Alexis, Rick is in the hospital. I don't know what happened but I promise I am going to get to the bottom of it. I just think you have the right to know. Where are you? Do you need a ride? Because, I can get…" Kate stopped and descended her body to the floor. She was beaten and worn. Her chest began to shake and she felt herself caving in. She couldn't offer words of encouragement because she had none to give. In that moment, the one person to hold her, was Rick. He needed to be held and she couldn't do a damn thing. That alone made her want to pass out.

"What happened? Wait, you said you don't know. I am, um, I am at a party for Sam. She just passed her college exam. I can get a ride but, what are you doing?"

Kate could hear the pain and strength in Alexis's voice and she became jealous. How can she stay strong yet I am falling apart? Why? Rick knows I am strong, that's one of the things he loves about me. Why can't I be strong for him now?

"Kate?" Alexis paced around the hallway but then someone turned the music up and she closed herself in the bathroom. "Kate?"

"I am out in some hallway. I, I'm sorry." Kate begged herself to not cry.

"For what? I trust that you will find out exactly what happened. You won't fail. Kate, that word is not in your vocabulary. I know all will be ok." Alexis brushed of the skirt of her dress and walked out of the bathroom. She moved past the crowd and grabbed her jacket off the back of the couch. She dug for her purse and heard Kate's muffled cries. "Kate, I have to say goodbye to Sam but then I will be right over. Text me the address."

"Ok."

"And Kate?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you." Alexis stood off to the side and smiled at Sam.

"Alexis, me too. But can you do me a favor?"

"Anything. You know that."

"Don't hold my lack of strength against me. I don't know what is happening." Kate rubbed her head and waved off a nurse that thought she needed help. She probably looked ill. Kate didn't have to look in a mirror to know that all the color had drain from her face. If this was worry, it was to the maximum.

"Kate, are you crazy?"

I might be, she thought.

"You are so madly in love with my brother. That's what is happening. Lack of strength? I don't know anyone stronger than you. Plus, you and my brother are meant to be. You are allowed to be lost. Ok?" Alexis waved at Sam and gave her, her index finger, signaling one minute.

"Thank you." Her breathless cry was too much, she could tell.

"I'll see you soon."

"Bye." Kate lifted her head up and turned her phone off but not before texting Alexis the address. She threw her head back against the wall that was supporting her crumpled up mess. She knew she had to get up but how? She was overwhelmed and broken. But then she remembered something her dad told her.

"Katie Kat, there will be times when you want to fall apart. And you can just as long as there is a ground to land on. And if you are lucky, someone will catch you before you do." He smiled and rubbed her head then tucked her in. "I love you honey."

"I love you too dad."

"As big as the moon?"

"No bigger."

"How big?" He would laugh and she would keep going.

"As big as I am allowed."

"Forever my love."

"For always." She would blow him a kiss and he would leave.

What I wouldn't give for him to hold me, she thought. But she picked herself up, wiped her face of tears, and headed back into the ICU for some answers. She knew something was up. Someone knows something. And I will be the one to find out what. She walked through the sliding doors and went up to the nurses' station. She flashed her badge and smiled.

"We need to talk."