Ch. 16 This Is How It Goes…
Alexis laid all her bags out across Kate's hospital bed and eagerly jumped up next to Kate. She wrapped her legs around Kate's hips and started fixing the mess of Kate's hair. She slid out her hairbrush and slowly and gently ran it through Kate's tangled mess.
"What did you do to your hair?" Alexis's pink brush got stuck within the tangled locks. While she brushed Kate talked.
"I mean I was only asleep for a few hours but my hair protested. Thank you for saving me." She winced when Alexis tugged.
"What is with all the bags?" Rick tried to take a peek but Alexis gave him a warning look. "Fine. But you know you are killing me." Rick leaned back into his chair and kicked his feet up and brought them across Kate's bed.
"Good." Alexis stuck her tongue out with her childish nature.
"Hey, Alexis?"
"Yeah. Stop moving."
"Sorry. But I was wondering if you would go with Rick to my apartment to get me a change of clothes and a pair of pajamas. Lanie can't go and I refuse to ask my mom. When I talked with her, she said that she would try to stop by but she has a new client." Kate tried to mask the disappointment that lay across her features but Rick wasn't buying it. Kate accepted Rick's hand and leaned back into Alexis.
Alexis sighed heavily and shoved Kate forward. "Fine. No problem but I said stop moving!" She breathed out with an urgency that only left Kate and Rick laughing at her.
She reached back into her backpack and slipped out a ponytail holder and a bobby pin. She wove her hands through Kate's hair making a waterfall braid. She reached back into her bag and slid out a white ribbon. She tenderly and just so, tied it at the end of the braid. She leaned back satisfied with her work.
"Here. Check it out." She handed Kate a mirror and held one herself so Kate could see her work.
"Holy shit Alexis. It looks amazing. How did you do that?" Kate kept admiring the braid until Alexis slid the mirror out of her hand. She tossed everything back into her bag and moved to sit in front of Kate.
"Practice. I just learned it. So you like?" She smiled with a feverish complexion. She slid out her personal boom box and the CDs she had brought.
"I love it! Thank you." Kate reached out for a hug and embraced Alexis. "So, what you got there?" She held her hands together and peeked over the bags that lay strewn across the bed.
"Surprises. Now be patient." Alexis set up the music and played Kate's favorite Paramore song first: "When It Rains". Kate clapped her hands in happiness and slowly started to sing it.
"And when it rains on this side of town it touches, everything…" She closed her eyes and swayed to the music.
Rick and Alexis sat and watched her movements and relished in her angelic voice. When Kate opened her eyes she caught them staring. But they weren't annoyed or ready to laugh, they were struck.
"What?"
"Your voice is so commanding. That is a compliment by the way." Alexis lay back down on her back and shoved the bags out of her way.
"Don't you go laying down. I want to know what's in those bags." Rick slapped the back of her head and she shot her tongue out in response.
"Fine." Alexis sat Indian style and picked up the first bag. "I got candy!" She tossed out the candy buttons to Kate and saw how happy she became. "I knew it was one of your favorites. Wait there is more." She tossed on the bed the: Necco wafers, Pop Rocks, Razzles, bottle caps, the Nerds, and finally the quarter pound bag of hot pink M&Ms. But she held up her finger to indicate that there was more. When she pulled out four big bags of cotton candy, Kate nearly lunged at Alexis.
"Alexis! I can't believe you did all this for me!" Kate let a single tear of joy fall but immediately tore into the cotton candy.
"I knew you would love it." She tossed Rick his Necco wafers and started to unroll the bottle caps for herself.
Kate was enjoying every sweet and sticky bite when she saw the brown package laying beside Alexis's hip. She pointed to it with a cotton candy coated finger. "What is in there?"
Alexis looked to her right and smiled. "A gift just for you. I didn't just want to get you a stuffed animal so I got you this." She eagerly handed Kate the vinyl and waited for her reaction.
Kate slid the album out of its package and sat stunned. Her mouth was ajar and she just ran her hand over the album title, her index finger sliding over every letter in Paramore. When she finally looked over she saw Alexis's big, cheerful grin. Kate couldn't say anything so she just nodded.
"Speechless? Damn I did good." Alexis just shoved everything aside and gave Kate the hug she knew she wanted. "I figured you have every other album by them so why not have the new one. I know you like it." When Alexis looked to Rick his face displayed thankfulness.
"God. Thank you Sweets. Oh yeah by the way, candy junkie, your nickname is Sweets." Kate just playfully shoved her shoulder and watched as Alexis fell back onto the bed.
"I love it. But what about your nickname? Hmmm." She tapped her chin while she dug around in her mind for the proper nickname. "How about Classic. It carries two meanings, one is how you love vinyl and only vinyl. The second is because you are always so classy. Yeah, Classic. I like it."
"Me too." Kate just laughed and smiled at Rick who seemed all too happy right where he was.
As Alexis waited outside Kate's hospital door, Kate confessed something that was a part of her past. Something that had stuck her in an emotional state that was unwelcome.
"When you and Alexis go in my closet, there is a box on the floor. It is small but important. It holds everything from the day my dad died. The clothes I wore, the book I read, everything. Even the pictures he took, his last ones. I haven't opened it since, not once. I just can't deal. I still can't. You need to know because it is one of the reasons I am the way I am. Does it change your opinion of me in any way?" Kate sat nervously, twiddling her fingers while waiting for him to say something, anything. Her eyes brimmed with fresh tears but she just kept her eyes trained on him.
As a tear ran down her cheek, he swiped it with his thumb. "I had a box like that. I went through it after years, and I mean years. In fact it does change my opinion of you." He watched as she lowered her face looking embarrassed and ashamed. "I love you more." When she looked up confused he quickly delivered the words. "You told me something that was too hard to tell. You held it in and now you let go. Kate," he took her shaking hands in his and smiled up at her. "you love me enough to share that. That is important." He shook her hands and waited for a smile.
"Thanks Rick." It was all the words that needed to be said. The words that would lead them down a road they thought was too far ahead.
Alexis opened Kate's closet and stood shocked. "Wow. What am I supposed to pick? There are so many!" She scanned her fingers over the wild assortment of fabrics. She passed through all the shirts and stopped when her fingers reached the dresses. "She has one in like every color!"
"Stop admiring and just pick something." Rick pulled open her chest and flipped through until he stopped at an oversized nightshirt. He tossed it on her bed then flipped through more drawers, collecting underwear and a bra. He went to her hall closet and sat down and slowly picked his way through her shoes.
"Al! Pick something so I can get the right shoes!" He leaned back to get a view of Alexis but she was still flipping through the closet. "Al! Hurry up!"
"Ok!" She stopped her hand along a white, linen dress. The bodice was pleated and lace ran along the hem and the waist. When she saw it she knew it was a dress Kate would appreciate. She delicately laid it across Kate's bed and went to see all the fuss Rick was yelling about.
"Finally! What did you pick?" He sat gesturing to the wide array of shoes looking completely out of his element.
"Move!" She shoved him aside and leaned to get a better look. The shoes had to match perfectly because that was what Kate would do. She pulled out a pair of suede, lace up, booties and knew that those were the ones.
"Did you pack the clothes yet?" Alexis stood with the shoes in her hand glancing down at Rick.
He rose with uneasiness. He clutched his rubs because it was still tender. "Not yet. I have to pack her socks now. Come on."
Rick nicely folded the t-shirt and lay that down. He then tossed in her underwear and bra. He let Alexis fold the dress then lay that next to everything else. The big brown messenger bag lay open on her bed until Alexis placed in the shoes. Rick zipped it all up and threw it over his shoulder.
"Do we have to leave so soon?" Alexis was too mesmerized by all the records that lay in the crates across Kate's floor.
"Yes. I still have to get clothes for myself. By the way, thanks for the ones you did pack." He lay his hand on Alexis's back and led her out of Kate's apartment.
"No fun." Alexis walked sulking behind him.
"Are you going to stay here or are you going back to the hospital?" Rick stood in Alexis's open door.
She looked around her room and shook her head. "No. I am coming." She went to her window closing it as the chill ran goose bumps along her arms and legs. "I have to change real quick." She closed the door and ran to her own closet. It was nothing like Kate's but she was still very proud of it. She scanned over some t-shirts and jeans. She slid on a pair of black skinny jeans then went to her shirts once more.
"Al! Not again!" Rick tapped lightly on her door and he heard her sigh angrily.
"Hold your damn horses Ricky!" She pulled out a heather-blue pullover that had the words: VERSE, VERSE, CHORUS, BRIDGE, SOLO, CHORUS written down it. She slid it over her head and reached atop the shelves in her closet and waited till her hand wrapped around a pale green beanie. She slid it atop her head and laid it just so. She kicked around the bottom of her closet and slid out a pair of black Converse. Once they were pulled on her feet, she opened her door.
"Finally! You take forever!" He rose up from the couch clutching Kate's bag.
"You big winy baby. I had to change. It is gonna be cold which reminds me." She ran back into her room and flipped her closet open once more.
"No more! Please!" He checked his watch and let out a frustrated sigh. He walked back to her room and waited outside her door.
She flipped through her hoodies and sweaters.
"What are you doing?" He looked her over with a quizzical look.
"Getting something for Kate should she get cold." She yanked out a grey pullover with black skulls all over it. She reached for Kate's bag and slid the sweater on top of the other clothes that lay in the bag.
"Are we done now?"
"One last thing." She went back to her closet and reached once more through her sweatshirts. She yanked on a black sweater pullover that had baby pink bows sprayed across it. "She might get cold when she gets home and she really doesn't own too many sweaters." She folded it and placed it in the bag and zipped it shut, for good.
"Now are we done?" Rick opened the front door and waited while Alexis slid her big, crotched, brown, hobo, bag over her shoulder.
"Alexis these sweaters are awesome." Kate fingered the soft cotton fabric. Her eyes marveled at the clothing Alexis had picked out for her.
Alexis sat on the end of Kate's bed, her legs crossed. "I thought that you might get cold. By the way you and I need to go shopping. You need sweaters and jeans, other than vintage style." She played with her braid that she had just done. Her red hair caught in the fluorescent light and sort of shimmered.
Kate watched Alexis play with hair and a sudden shock struck her core. Red hair! Red Two Shot! Alexis has red hair! Her face was frozen with panic and Rick noted how her mouth was agape.
"Kate? Are you ok?" Rick leaned forward in his chair and watched as Kate went pale.
Alexis looked up from her hair and watched as Kate began to get dizzy. She reached for Kate's arm and pulled her forward, closer to her. "Kate, stay with us. Don't you faint!" But Kate slipped back and her eyes closed.
In Kate's mind, everything was black. A clean slate. She heard faint frantic cries and noisy machines. She heard loud voices leaning over her but that all stopped as the black took over.
Rick and Alexis watched as the nurse tried to shake Kate awake. "What happened?" She glared over at them as if they were to blame.
"Nothing. She just fainted." Rick spoke in defense of how the nurse was staring at Alexis.
Alexis felt judged and she slid herself from the bed and went into the bathroom off Kate's room. She splashed cold water on her face and got an idea. She wet a washcloth with the ice cold water and marched up to Kate. She carefully lifted Kate's head off her pillow and placed the cold cloth against her neck.
Kate felt a striking cold temperature grace her skin. She jolted open her eyes and found herself staring up at Alexis. As she was assisted in sitting up, she remembered what happened.
"I fainted because Alexis, your hair." She ran her fingers through her hair, surely messing up the braid. She reassured Rick with the simple gesture of raising up her hand.
Alexis glanced down at her hair. She couldn't see anything wrong with it. "Is something wrong?" She dropped the braid more sure of herself than Kate.
"I can't… no. Nothing is wrong." I can't tell her what is happening out there. She wouldn't feel safe, even though she isn't. "Just be careful ok. I need you to never walk alone or do something reckless. Promise me?" She reached out for Alexis's hand and she nervously accepted it.
"Ok. I won't. I promise but can you tell me what this is about?" Alexis sat down next to Kate resting her legs against Kate's.
"No, I can't. Sorry. Just be careful." Kate lay her hand on Alexis's head so it was resting on her shoulder. She linked arms with Alexis and leaned back on the bed, cuddling up to her.
"Don't worry about me. Classic, I will be careful I promise." She leaned further into Kate's neck. It was a bonding moment, something sisters would do. And in some way they were sisters, it's how they felt about each other.
"You can't be too careful." Kate had to say it and they both chuckled with laughter.
Rick just took it all in as his girlfriend and his sister connected. He admired their easy love. It was a sight that put a part of his heart to rest. With Alexis's serene blue eyes and Kate's honey eyes; they couldn't look more different. But in some way, one Rick couldn't see but he could feel, they were identical. It was a soul bond.
"So this is how it goes…" Rick and Kate had said goodbye to Alexis as she made her way home. She planned on crashing at Rick's and promised to bring Kate lunch the next day. When she left they realized just how tired they were. "I will help you get dressed and you will not fight me. It's my turn to take care of you." He slid out the nightshirt he had packed just that day. It was a short, pink, jersey sweater with big, white numbers, 44, printed on the front. He slid out her bra and a pair of heather grey boxer shorts.
"I don't need the bra. Just the shorts and shirt." She kicked the sheets off of her legs and swung herself over the side of the bed. "Ok. You can help me." She lifted up her arms while he slid the hospital nightgown off her. He helped get her hands through the sleeves of the nightshirt and she leaned on him while she stood to get the boxers on. She felt him get excited and smiled to herself.
"Now I have to get dressed." He slid a new pair of boxers on and pulled a white t-shirt over his head. "Do you want me to open the door now?"
"No. Leave it shut. Now come here." She waited as he climbed up to her left side. He slid his arm under her head and she snuggled right up to him. She rested her arm across his chest and held him to her.
"I could stay like this Richard Castle." She dug her head into his side.
"So could I Kathryn Beckett." He wrapped his other arm across her and leaned down to kiss her soft, brown locks. "Always." He kissed her forehead one last time before shutting his eyes.
Kate dreamed that night, for the first time she dreamed of a future with Rick. She toyed with the idea of starting a family and marriage, all the things she never thought she could consider. And when she woke she lifted her eyes up to him but he was peacefully sleeping. The dream didn't freak her out, in fact it left her empty. There was a hole where the dream dug in. Now she wanted nothing more than for her dream to turn into reality.