Ch. 28 Can't Hold On Any Longer

Kate snuggled closer to Rick rather than rising out of bed as she usually liked to do. She smiled to herself as she drifted back to their night of on again off again love making. And the fear she thought she'd have about staying at his place was gone within minutes of them connecting. She had a wonderful on and off again sleeping schedule and she relished in that.

"Mmmm." Rick brought himself closer to her and his warm arms wrapped around her. "Like I said last night, so glad I gave you a key." He bent down to kiss her and she closed her eyes all ready, when there was a knock at his door. He proceeded to ignore it but they heard yelling.

"You better check that out. Sounds important." He leaned back to her and she stopped him. "Plus, you'll have angry neighbors and not just any old angry neighbors, angry neighbors in New York." He weighed his options and gave her a quick kiss before leaping out of bed.

And as his ass left the room, she waited a minute and sure enough he ran back in and she tossed him a pair of his boxers. She made her way over to the drawer she had packed but saw his tossed t-shirt that she didn't wear long enough the night before, and slid that on.

Nothing wrong with being sexy, she thought. But when she walked out and into his living room, she felt less sexy and more slutty. No, more one night stand. Because there in his living room, was Cliff, some of his team members, Ryan, Espo, and Captain Montgomery. But she didn't dart back into the room, even though she lacked underwear or bra. She stayed put like they were the ones invading her space instead of vice versa.

"So, today is the day that you actually need to be seen with him. We would like to set up visuals in your place in case he stops by but…" Cliff stopped and looked at Kate in the kitchen. "So, we need to make sure that he trusts you enough to come back and visit his place of operations. Understood?"

Kate could feel Cliff's eyes boring into her back but she tossed it off her shoulder because she was ready to continue enjoying last night. She poured herself and Rick a cup of coffee and didn't bother with anyone else. But as she was waiting for the coffee to be finished, Ryan came up to her.

"I can help you. Do you need help?" He stayed a safe distance away from her and she was welcome for it. But she made no decision to answer.

Kate bent down in front of his fridge and dug around in the back for the creamer. But she forgot about the lack of clothing underneath the shirt that she was wearing. She was all but positive that Ryan was getting one hell of a view.

"Kate," Ryan tapped her on the shoulder and she emerged with coffee creamer in her hand. "It doesn't have to be weird you know. We came to an agreement, even though I disagree on it, I get it. As much as I want to be with you, it would ruin what we have. Well now, it ruined what we had." He moved out of her way when she headed back to the coffe pot. "What I wanted to accomplish by coming over here was to say that I am sorry." She gave him her attention and he continued. "I'm sorry that I took advantage of you." She started to shake her head and he grabbed her hand and pulled her into Rick's bedroom.

"Ryan, Ryan, no." She wanted to get out of the bedroom and back to eavesdropping on the pow wow that was happening in Rick's living room but he had no intention on letting that happen.

"I need to get this off my chest. I was wrong Kate. I took advantage of you and your niceness. You only let me kiss you because you felt bad about me being hurt. I know you Kate. Just like you let me call you Kate and let me get all worried about you when that so goes against the cop code. Just like you kissing me. You were scared about something and now I know that it was about Rick. You were so scared that you kissed me, thinking that that somehow solved things. I get it." She looked down and he lifted her chin. She pushed away from him and went to sit on Rick's bed.

"You don't get it. What if I wanted to kiss you? What does that say about me? I cheated on him Ryan." She brought her knees up to her chest but then remembered her lack of clothing and dropped them.

"No you didn't. You kissed me out of fear. You want to know how I know?" She looked towards him. "Because I see the way you look at him. I can tell how much you love him Kate. Any idiot could see that you are over the moon for him and he feels the same way about you. So don't let what happened between us make you fear what could happen between you two." He touched her knee but withdrew his hand.

She looked at Ryan and felt a rush of sadness and guiltiness, over the situation, rush out of her. She surprised him by pulling him into a hug. It was the kind of thing that she could only do with Ryan and not feel like being too sensitive.

"Thank you. And if we are being honest, I love you calling me Kate. And I loved that you had a crush on me. Because I did like you Ryan but I didn't want it to ruin our work relationship so I didn't pursue those feelings. And then Rick came into the picture and I still enjoyed your attention, I blame myself on that. But don't change how you care about me, please." She grabbed his hand but in a friendly way and not a boyfriend/girlfriend way.

"I will never stop caring about you Kate." He smiled at the same time as she did. It was understood that they would be professionals but still have a close friendship.

"We should probably get back out there before they think something is up." He squeezed her hand then left the room. She waited before he was totally gone before she emerged.

But when Kate walked out to the living room, Rick was closing the door after them. "They're gone?" She watched him fall back into his chair and she slid herself on his lap.

"Yeah, thank God." He rested his hand on her knee and just looked at her. He lightly smiled and she was busy looking elsewhere.

Kate leaned into him and his shirt rolled up, exposing her. She just laughed it off and went to pull it down but his hand slid the shirt off her completely. She raised one eyebrow and he jumped off the couch and grabbed her and threw her across his back. She was too busy laughing to complain.

And in the secretiveness of his bedroom, they went for one more round.

Kate dropped her hair and slammed her brush on his bathroom counter and he came in just as she sat on the counter. She played with her towel that was wrapped around her while he just tried to stifle his laughter.

"Is there a reason that you are about to burst out in a hideous fit of the giggles?" She raised her eyebrows and he just came closer to her. He leaned forward and she gently kissed his forehead.

"Ok, now that I was able to stop it, why are you so upset?" He looked around his bathroom for a tell and saw the hairbrush tossed across the counter. "Your hair maybe?"

"I can't get it up the way I want to. I wanted a high ponytail but my hair won't cooperate with me."

"Why do you need a high ponytail?" He stepped back from her and started to dig around her for his toothbrush.

"Because of my outfit. It goes well with a ponytail. Now what am I supposed to do?"

He was busy brushing his teeth and she just scoffed and went to find her phone. She laid out her outfit across his bed and positioned her camera just so, then snapped a picture. She quickly texted it to Alexis then waited for her reply.

Classic,

I love it. But you are right, a high ponytail would look amazing but how about just putting the top of your hair into a ponytail? Try it. Much love. Will talk about Scott later. ;)

Kate thought it over and agreed. She put her essentials on then slid the peach, spaghetti strapped, dress on. She tied a white belt around her waist then smiled down at herself. She went to her drawer and pulled out her little Tupperware container and slid out her white ribbon. She walked out of the room and into Alexis's bathroom and secured her top ponytail with her white ribbon. She giggled happily then headed back to show Rick how she looked.

"Well?" She curtsied for him then waited for his reaction to show.

"You look yummy." He arched one brow and she couldn't help but laugh. "What are your plans for today?"

She thought back to her waiting warrant and suddenly started to rush. She grabbed her white, wedge, sandals and quickly slid them on. "If you want a ride to wherever you are going, you better get dressed fast." She continued to toss her stuff in her bag as he just stood standing.

"I'm not going to need a ride today." And with the tone his voice took, she knew his plans somehow involved Sal. She tried not to let it get to her, she should trust the F.B.I. but, a big part of her worried for him constantly.

"Kate, I know you are worried but I am in safe hands, trust me. All I have to get out of him is his location then they sweep in and this is all done with." He just watched her putting stuff away then grabbed her arm. "Look at me." He let go of her arm when her big, honey, eyes set on him. "I know you are worried about me. But, I worry about you all the time. After this, we'll be good."

"How do you know? What if they decide to press charges against you? What will I do then? I know this is intense but I can't live without you Rick. Not after I know how it feels." She felt a rush of tears heading her way but she stopped them in their tracks.

"You won't have to find that out, I promise." He watched her eyes start to water so he quickly pressed on. "I know that after you lost your dad, you shut down. But after you met me, you found yourself opening up. You won't lose me like you lost your dad. Ok?" His eyes searched hers and when she made her way to him, he welcomed her into his open arms.

"I just love you so much Rick." She tugged him closer to her body and tried to find her inner strength.

When Kate came back with all the victims' medical records, she gathered her team in the bull pen.

"Ok, Espo and Ryan take Sylvia Peters, Corrina Syms, and Cynthia Darius." She turned to the other detectives in the room. "Vasquez and Runner, take Shaya Reed, Gisella Moon, and Elena Carter." She wrote their names next to the victims' so she would know who was working on who. "Fuller and Percy, take Imogen Bells, Alaine Waters, and Hallie Burns." She kept divvying up the victims to the rest of her squad and when all their names were recorded, she grabbed her own cases.

The main objective she wanted to accomplish was a connection to all of them as well as if they had a certain doctor in common. But her search didn't last long, Tara Flowers and Dan Flowers stood in front of her desk and she ushered them into an interview room.

"It was Tara's idea to come here. She wanted to talk to you." He was slightly curt to Kate but she chalked that up to the loss he was still dealing with.

"My mom would never just leave me alone. She would watch me like a damn hawk. There wasn't one thing that I could do that she didn't know about. So when I couldn't find her, I knew something bad had happened." The young girl who sat in front of Kate was mature beyond her years but Kate chalked that up to the loss that she had to deal with at a very young age.

"What made you head to another mother?"

"My mom would never leave me, so when she was gone I was hoping that she had headed to talk with another mom but…"

Kate looked at Tara, no more than eleven but by the way she held herself and expressed herself, she could be twenty.

"It's not fair, I know." Tara lifted her watery eyes to Kate and became confused. "I get it. The constant analyzing, the worrying that it will continue to happen, and the worst, the replays."

"You know about that? How?"

"I lost my dad and I still am not over it. But I don't think that we're meant to get over them. I think that we're supposed to build on that. You know what I mean?"

"Yeah." She smiled at Kate and swiped at her tears.

"I appreciate you coming down here to talk to me. I wish we would have done it sooner but I get it, you weren't ready."

"I believe in you like I have never believed in anyone who worked my mother's case. Thank you." She rose from her seat on the little couch and made her way to Kate's arms.

Kate wrapped her arms around Tara and stood up with her still in her arms. "I will give Ryann justice. Ok?" Tara nodded then released herself from Kate.

"Thank you Detective." She grabbed her dad's hand on the way out.

"Call me Kate, Tara." They shared a smile and a connection that most wouldn't understand.

Gwenie's medical records laid out in front of Kate and she scoured them. They told a story to her but one that would need further digging.

"Hey Lanie, I need a favor."

"Name it girl."

"Ok," She quickly scanned the file, "what does it mean if she had many MRIs and Cardiac CTs?"

"That there was something up with her heart and brain. They only run those tests if they think something is up. And if she had a lot that meant that they were still looking for something that they themselves couldn't find."

"Thanks Lanie."

"Anything girl."

Frank York sat in a chair that was directly across from Kate's chair. The microphone that was set up on the table was making Frank very nervous but then again everyone was nervous when they were being interrogated.

"I was cleared by the earlier cop. So why am I here once more?"

"Because a girl was murdered and you were the last one to see her alive. So why don't you tell me what happened that day."

"I picked up like five kids total. They were the only ones that needed a ride from choir. So I drove them all home because Maybelle was the last stop. I dropped her off like every other day and that's it."

"You didn't happen to see what happened to her? Maybe look out your rearview mirror?"

"No. I dropped her off then left. It's just a job."

"You didn't happen to notice anything different about her?"

"She played with her hair and listened to her music, nothing more."

Kate continued to watch him and he had no tell that he was lying. And as much as she wanted to close the case, he wasn't her guy. But then who was?

"You're free to go." She opened the door for him and watched him leave. The minute that she was out of the room, Espo and Ryan looked at her. She shook her head no and they went back to their case files.

Kate was surveying the murder boards when she was unhappily interrupted by a call. She picked up the phone and listened carefully as the voice over the phone brought a chill up her spine.

"You care for red heads? Funny that I didn't know that you had one as well. We have that in common detective." She flagged Espo down and he began on the trace.

"Who is this?"

"Nice try. But you really should have protected her better. At least a little warning. I never have tortured one of my victims, that's not how I operate but I will make a special circumstance, just for you. You're very welcome."

"What the hell are you talking about?" She had already began to jot down notes and continued as he spoke to her.

"I believe she is your boy's sister. Alexis, right?" Kate heard a shriek in the background and she bolted up from her chair, knocking her notes aside.

"Don't you hurt her!"

"Oh, I won't, well just not right now. But keep in mind detective that I take you finding me as a personal challenge. Others have failed, shall you fail, you can kiss this little beauty goodbye." And with that, he hung up.

Kate still gripped the phone in her hand when Espo shouted that he had a trace on the call. She reacted like any cop would, she gathered her things, slid her gun holster on her belt then grabbed her keys and bolted.

When they pulled up to the Pines Hotel, they slowly gathered around the front of the building. The SWAT showed up within minutes. She checked all her backup and made sure they all wore vests before she headed to the squad car she was being signaled to.

"Ok, we have a layout of the hotel. Part of it had already been demolished as you can tell, here and here are the luxury sweets." He called another man in uniform to come greet her.

"Stan Wun." He smiled at her then went right back to paying attention to his captain. He listened as he was instructed to run thermal heating on all floors before her and her squad could move in.

The tiny force that the little town had formed made sure they were part of it. They headed in after the thermal scan was done, indicating that they were in the theater. Kate, Espo, Ryan, and other uniforms she had gathered, followed in after the SWAT continued to clear the rooms.

Her team stepped into the theater, everyone hitting a different entrance and direction. But when they stepped into the theater, Kate had a chill, so cold that she shivered from it. Because there on the screen, was Alexis, tied to a chair, blood falling from a cut against her head.

Kate continued to hold her gun steady, even though her entire body was shaking. She signaled everyone to take the room, little by little, clearing the way into the projector room. Kate headed up there herself and when she entered the room, there Alexis was with a camera trained on her.

"So glad you could make it Detective Beckett. I sure am glad that you gave me your card should I need to make a call." Dr. Jared Conway stood, with a knife in hand, smiling.

"Don't make another move, I'll shoot." She aimed her gun right at his head, ignoring the fact that the chest is the way to go. She wanted him dead and gone and the head was her best option of completing that goal.

"No you won't and you want to know why? Because you want her alive. Am I right?" He stepped closer to Alexis. The gun was made noticed by Alexis's wandering eyes.

Kate looked, briefly, in the direction her eyes took and saw the gun that was trained on her. But what shocked her the most was that he had a button to press in the little remote that was nestled in his hand. The fact that he had all this prepared and thought out meant that he had planned on this for quite some time. She tried not to think of him stalking Alexis but she couldn't shake the image of herself being attacked that one night.

"Kate, don't do anything, he'll kill you." Alexis's tears were stained against her cheeks but no more made their escape.

"You really should listen to this little red, Detective." Jared Conway smiled then sat down in a chair that was positioned right at Alexis. He smiled before tracing her chin with his finger.

"You think you are going to get out of this? Please, you don't know me very well Doc." Kate still kept her gun trained on his head and she could feel the sweat trickle down her back.

"Do you know how my boy felt when I told him what he needed to do for me?" He didn't wait for an answer but just continued talking like he was reading a child's story book and not explaining his twisted inner beings. "He freaked that he had to continue this legacy. But do you know how many times he fucked up? Too many, and that Cynthia girl was the last straw."

Kate's mind began to shake from the realization that she was in the presence with one hell of a sick bastard.

"He couldn't even burn them the right way. What was I to do? And when poor Abby killed herself, he was devastated. He blamed Paulie, he still loved her and I told him that Paulie needed to pay." Jared turned his head around to face Kate and watch her reaction. "So, he took Paulie out of the equation. He was a good boy like that. And he really hit the jackpot that day he dropped Abby off at the Vets place. A whole group of red heads just within reach. He found the courage and I couldn't have been more proud until I hear word that they think there are two people pulling off these murders. I didn't train him that way." He rose from the chair and paced the room, thumb poised over the button on the remote. He stroked his chin like this lecture wasn't enough.

Kate adjusted her position so she was no longer blocking the only entrance in the room. But as she tilted, she feared that they would rush in and in the end, Alexis would be no more. She contemplated moving back in front of the door when she remembered the camera. She wanted to get a signal out, without Jared seeing her but it wasn't the right time.

He turned back with a smile on his face. "You forgot to ask why the red hair. Aren't you curious?" He leaned on his elbow, like a professor waiting to chew you apart.

"Of course I am. That's the only reason I am here. You deserve to tell your grand story. One to last the ages." She knew he was one who wanted to be recognized for his work. And if that meant keeping Alexis alive, it was more than worth it.

"I am glad that you finally see it that way, Detective. So, when I was about five or six, I wandered through my parents backwoods. They were quite extraordinary and I was so curious. They forbid me but I never listened." He leaned against the shelving in the room and Kate lost her aim on him. "There was this woman, naked in the woods. And her long, red, hair swayed in the light breeze, she was beautiful. Anyway, her fingers and toes were all burned. I played with her body and it marveled me as to who would do such a thing. But you see Detective, I wanted to know more, I kept exploring her." His face grew flush as if this woman had aroused him in some sick way.

"Why didn't you run?"

"Run? Why? I wanted more of her. Her head was shot straight through and that was it. I wanted more, I knew I could make a better masterpiece. But I was too young to let that side of me show. They would think I was crazy. And we couldn't have that now Detective, could we?"

"Of course not. Your work hadn't been completed yet."

"Correct. So I improved on it, each time, I took a different approach. I saved their hair in a little box with a red ribbon around it. I never leave without it." He gestured to a little box that lay beside Alexis.

"But why so random? Why no sure thing?"

"I wanted it to be better each time. I was in no mood to be predictable. That would be horrid but you see, when I found out that I had cancer, I had no choice but to train my young Joe. At first, I was proud but so many mistakes. And you know how I lucked out?" He waited for a response but Kate just gave him a quick shrug. He frowned but went on anyway. "Patients. So many patients. I couldn't have been more than happy with the improvements I found I could make. And pretty soon, I was everywhere. My creations were getting recognized. It was glorious!" He looked to the ceiling and drew a sinister smile across his mouth.

Kate adjusted her movement to get a better angle on him but he looked too quickly for her to continue on. "But why attack me? As you can see Jared, I am no red head."

"Blame my son, he wanted you out of the equation but I explained to him that the cops were an important part of the equation. The show couldn't go on without you. He learned quickly and we were both glad to hear of your recovery." He came back into a better aim and leaned to Alexis. He lifted her chin in his hands and leaned down to give her a kiss when Kate shouted.

"DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH HER!" The anger was on another level entirely and he just gave her an all knowing smile before he dropped Alexis's chin. She stepped a bit closer and he caught the slight movement.

"Take off your vest, Detective. Let's make this fair." He slid the knife in the air, gesturing to Alexis.

"Why?"

"Because this," he shook the remote, "could kill her."

Kate complied and slid her vest off and kicked it aside. She would do anything to save Alexis and as much as she didn't want to make his demands, she realized she had no choice.

"You don't have to try to save her, it won't work. I hold her life in my hands and well, if I must die today, which I presume is a possibility, then I will take one last sweet release with me." He contained no smile, no poise, and for once, he let her see who he really is. In his eyes, there was nothing, all empty. And if eyes are windows to the soul then he possessed none. He looked shrunken down, like the weight of all his and his son's victims had finally sunken in. His frame hunched down as he placed himself on the chair.

"Are you giving up?" It was one sentence, with no one liners, no quotable comments, but a simple question to her biggest answer: would Alexis make it out alive.

"No, no. I will never seize but I fear my time is running out." He quickly rose from the seat and grabbed one of Alexis's wrists, he held it up as he freed it from the arm of the chair. Alexis thrashed and thrashed her arm trying to break free from his grip but his thin fingers latched on. He raised a barber blade, from his pocket, and brought it to her wrist. Kate looked for the remote and it was still clutched in his hand. With one quick movement, he sliced her wrist.

Alexis's screams were deafening. She thrashed in her chair and he began to squeeze her wrist, as the blood flowed, making a surrounding puddle of her blood. Kate kept eye on Alexis, as her fight weakened and as she slumped in the chair, letting the light out of her, fade. Kate could take no more, she took one bullet out of her gun by firing right at his head.

The blast was silent, as Kate's heart raced out of her chest. He fell back onto the floor and Kate, no longer trained on the gun focused on Alexis, made her way to her. Footsteps sounded on the stairs and Kate knew backup was on its way. And as she tried to stop Alexis's bleeding, a bullet fired, striking her in the chest. She fell back and looked up and was relieved to see her dad.