Estrangement

Disclaimer: Don't own Victorious

A/N:

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Chapter 22 (Used to be Friends Forever)

"Courtney come in, come in…" Tori led Courtney inside, nervous but anxious to talk to her. Courtney pulled away from her and looked towards Megan, who was halfway done with her food. She took a deep breath and watched as the woman made her way to the table.

"Megan, we have to go." She couldn't believe this! Trina had given her more time of day than Courtney? At least her sister talked to her, but this hurt, mostly because Courtney was like a sister to her when they were growing up. Tori wanted to die, to fall on her knees and plead for Courtney to acknowledge her. "Your mother isn't going to be happy knowing you ran off to see Tori."

"Aw we can keep this between me and you, right Aunt Courtney?" Courtney crossed her arms and tapped her finger onto her forearm. Megan turned to Tori and waved. "She's not usually this strict seeming, you should see her on a better day." Tori began to feel limp as the sensation in her feet began to deplete. Megan took another bite and closed her eyes. "Come on Auntie, don't be mean, Mom's giving her a chance. You two used to be good friends and she's trying to do better. Talk to her, Aunt Tori shouldn't be ostracized for something that happened so long ago." Tori's jaw dropped and Courtney's eyebrows rose up slowly.

"Megan-"

"Besides, I'm not done eating, and I'm not moving until I'm done." Courtney stuttered as Megan took another bite. Tori cupped her hand over her growing smile, trying to avoid laughing. Megan was truly Trina's daughter, there was no doubt about that. "So Aunt Courtney, I'm sorry, but I'm staying right here until I finish eating. I know mom's not going to be happy with me when I get home…I just wanted to see my aunt."

"Oh all right, finish your meal dear…" Courtney moved over to the couch and took a seat. Tori hesitated, unsure whether she wanted to go up to her or remain frozen. She saw Jade give her a look to prompt her into moving over. She swallowed as fear grabbed at her. Was Courtney really still angry at her for blowing her off? Or was there more to it than she realized?

She took a slow step forward and lifted her hand slightly, speaking with a quavering voice. "C-Courtney…I know I messed up, and I'm sorry. I know it was a long time ago…" Courtney looked over her shoulder, arching up an eyebrow. "I shouldn't have brushed you off like that. We…We were like sisters, you were my best friend and I loved having a friend as close as you." She lowered her hand to the couch and felt a pang of sorrow strike her as her former friend closed her eyes and looked away. "I know you must hate me, but after all these years, can't we at least start fresh? I miss you…" Courtney's shoulders fell and she shook her head.

"It's one thing that you blew me off and obviously brushed off that dream of ours, but it's another thing that you did that with your own family." Courtney's eyes opened and dimmed for a minute as she glanced to the floor. "Yeah it hurt, but you'd made your decision as far as I was concerned. Trina's willing to give you a chance because you're her sister and she loves you." Her heart jumped up. Hearing that from someone else was something she needed, but still, it was beside the point. "I don't have to give you anything. I want to, but as far as I know, you've changed to much. The Tori that was my best friend would never have tossed me aside for the jerks back there, she would never have disrespected her family, let alone allow anyone else to do it."

"I'm not that woman anymore, Courtney." She put her hands to her chest, her voice still wavering with fear and sadness. "Honest. I'm trying to be better. I still want what I wanted back then-"

"What? To work with animals or to sing. Because singing is oh so important, more so than animals." She winced inwardly and tried to brush off the remark, but it was so filled with resentment and anger that she couldn't easily deflect it. Tears welled up in her eyes.

"To be a veterinarian, Courtney. I realize singing isn't my dream. It's something I enjoy, sure, something I love, but it's not…it's not the end all thing that I want. I love animals, I love being around them still, and I still want to take care of them…" Courtney pressed her lips together and crossed her arms. Tori felt her muscles tighten and she resisted a frustrated cry. "I don't expect you to forgive me right away, I just-I just want to know that I have a chance of being your friend again." Her eyes drifted down to Courtney's stomach and her lips parted gently, she was now noticing the pregnancy bump. She was excited to see this, but at the same time, sad that she hadn't been a part of her life. "How far along are you?"

When they were young, they would talk on and off about boys and growing up to have amazing families. They wanted to be each other's maid of honor and would always say how they'd forever be a part of each other's families. Courtney placed a hand on her stomach and looked down, smiling gently. "She's due on the 29th of May. Carmen, my third baby. It's Mrs. Carson now, Tori…" Tori gushed. She moved beside Courtney and studied the shimmering ring on her finger.

"That's great! How long have you been married? What's he like?"

"James is a good man, we married in 2020…our son was born in '22, and Elena in '25. James is a lawyer, although he'd like to find a job that lets him be around more for the kids and myself." Courtney lifted her head and gazed over to Tori. "I guess you've never married or had kids?"

"No…but it would be nice." This was great! She finally got Courtney talking! Of course, talking about family or about the men in their lives might be a good way to get some sort of common ground. There had to be something. "I um-I met this guy and he's got a son of his own, but they're good people." Courtney's eyebrows shot up and she curled a finger beneath her chin.

"Oh? Tell me about him."

"Well there's not much to say-I only just met him and we have a second date this Saturday. He wants to take me up to the Empire State Building. I've never been." Courtney laughed and brandished a hand through the air.

"You'll love it. James took me up there on our fifth date, and every now and then we'll take our kids up there. The view is remarkable, especially when you're seeing the sunset." Courtney hesitated for a second and looked over to Megan, who oddly enough, was still eating. "Hm…so…tell me about this guy?"

"Only if you tell me all about James."

"Oh all right." Courtney rolled her eyes and smiled. Tori beamed for joy and immediately began talking about Zack.

"So he's tall, handsome, and smart. He's helped me out with groceries and showed me around Central Park. Zack's a manager at that Tipton Hotel and is a single father. I'm looking forward to our second date, I really am. I'm hoping to see how well things turn out, but since we've only just started talking…there's really not much to say." Courtney nodded and folded her hands over on her lap. Tori leaned to the right and held her smile. "So…Tell me about Mr. Carson. I know you want to."

"James is a good man, knows his way in a courtroom and has the kindest smile. He's always making sure the kids are happy, and does everything he can to spend time with us as a family since he's often always busy. I remember when we were first dating, he'd start a bath for me and put these candles and rose petals everywhere. Sometimes he still does it." Courtney sighed dreamily and Tori closed her eyes, imagining the amount of love her friend must have for her husband and children. "You never married, Tori?"

She wanted that in her life, she always had, but her dream killed that for her. "No. I want to. I want to have a family, I want to be happy and to be a good mother for my children…I've been hung up on wanting to be a singer that I just…never had time for relationships. I guess-I guess my wanting to be a singer made me forget everything I really wanted out of life…" It was a shameful fact, but now she was trying to work on that. "It's funny, if it were anything else I'd be wondering where the hell I went wrong in life, but…but I know where I went wrong."

"You just wanted to be accepted, that's all." Courtney leaned back and lifted her shoulders. "The problem is, you already were. You just didn't realize it." Tori glanced up to Courtney, frowning as the girl nodded her head. "Friends forever. That's what we said, that's what we were supposed to be, what we were going to do. You knew who you were, what you wanted, and Trina saw that. She loved you, cared for you more than any older sibling would. She wanted the best for you, wanted you to become what you wanted most…to achieve that dream of yours, to start a family and be happy…"

"And I messed up…"

"Well." Courtney glanced around the house. Tori's heart sank and tears threatened her eyes once more. "Apparently you're working on it. Do you think you're going to have enough for rent this month?"

"Yeah. I'm hoping to save what I can. I appreciate that Trina's at least giving me a chance. I want to show her I have what it takes. It's difficult, and I still wish I could-or a part of me wishes-that I could achieve that impossible dream. Still, it's not for me, it's not what I want anymore."

"It was never what you wanted. We all knew that. I was a little shocked when Trina said to us that she was giving you a chance, but you two are sisters after all, so there's really nothing surprising about it."

"I don't want to let her down. I really don't. Except for one thing…"

"What?"

"Picking up those towels are so gross!" Courtney laughed while Tori shuddered. "It's not funny!" She crossed her arms and pout her lip.

"Oh dear, she's got you on towel duty huh? Well just keep working hard, get promoted to a better position…"

"I really want to work the smoothie stand, but I have to work a bit before I can be trained by the lady there. I'm sick of towels…they're gross, disgusting and horrible." Courtney started to smirk and narrowed her eyes slyly.

"Just think of it like you're picking up dog poop." Tori chuckled nervously and slowly shook her head.

"I'd rather be doing that, to be honest with you. I don't know how these people manage to get these towels so messy! It's just-the longer I work for Gold's Gym, I guess the better my resume will look. I mean it's like…a CEO has given me a chance, sister or not, that looks good right?"

"Of course. I also know Trina's not the only one watching you work…" Tori froze as Courtney winked and checked her phone. Her heart skipped a beat as she pondered the woman's words.

"What? What do you mean?" All eyes were on her? Was that it? Courtney shrugged and stood from the couch.

"I can't say, but I can say this-it sounds like the longer you can show work ethic and remain with the company-the better it's going to look for certain people. Don't forget that Trina's word is powerful to other business people, a CEO's recommendation and seal of faith is a strong one. The fact that she's given you a chance means other people might be watching your progress."

"Like who? You're talking like there are specific people. Are there specific people?"

"Can't say." Courtney looked to Megan and whistled. The girl was washing her plate in the sink. She looked up and started to frown. "Megan, I need to get back to the house. It's time to go." Megan groaned as she shut off the faucet.

"Aw can't I stay longer? You can just swing by tomorrow morning, right?"

"No sweetie, I have to get you to your mom tomorrow."

"All right, all right." Megan hurried over and looked up to Tori with a smile. "It was nice seeing you, Aunt Tori." Tori's heart swelled up and she reached over, hugging her niece.

"You too, Megan." She leaned upright and met Courtney's eyes. "Courtney?" The woman's eyebrow lifted and a hum of acknowledgement fell from her lips. "Can I-we still talk? I mean…I know it's not much, and maybe you're still angry, I just…I would love to talk to you some more. To start fresh-if you'd give me a chance, maybe we can be friends again?"

"Maybe. I'm a busy woman these days. Not as busy as Trina is with her family and work schedules, but I can try. I'm a rescue worker, and work closely with a top notch Veterinarian, did you know?"

"That's amazing!"

"Yeah. She's looking around for an apprentice. Maybe after a while working for Gold's, I could pass your name onto her…" Her heart leapt up and filled with a lingering sense of hope that she'd not felt in such a long time. "But as for me and you being friends again? It'll take some time…like I said, I can try. I'll give you my number and you can give me yours, then I'll give you a call sometime. You can let me know how your second date goes."

"Thanks!" She started to hug Courtney, but stopped as the woman took a slight step back and smiled awkwardly. "Sorry…" They weren't that close again, yet, but maybe one day they could be.

"It's okay." Courtney pulled out her phone and Tori handed hers over. She watched the woman enter in the numbers, then give her back the phone. "Here, I'll talk to you soon, okay?"

"Okay Courtney. It was good to see you again…"

"Yeah." Courtney's eyes dipped down for a moment, then rose back up. "You too." Tori clasped her hands at her waist and smiled as Courtney and Megan left the apartment. A stray tear left her eyes as she turned around and swept it away with her finger. Jade glanced up from the table and gave her a friendly smile.

"That went well," Jade remarked. Tori sniffled and made her way back to the table. Her body was on fire and her heart was racing.

"I guess so…She's right, we used to always say we'd be best friends forever and all that stuff. We'd talk about boys, we'd annoy our siblings, show off in science class…we were inseparable once, and now it feels…It feels hard knowing that's not there anymore. It's hard knowing that things probably won't ever be that way again."

"That's life, Tori…as painful as it is. Things happened, a lot of time grew between you two. Maybe it won't be the same way it was then, but at least she's willing to try and be friends again. You can form another bond in there somewhere, you know. It'll just take time."

"And effort. I know." She sat at the table and folded her arms on the surface. "Seeing Megan too…that was-it was something." She wanted to see her niece again, to spend more time with her. She started to chuckle and tucked her hair over her ear. "I can't believe she did that though. Ran off like that to come here."

"Seemed planned, she did say she left her aunt a note specifically telling her where she was going. It all worked out though. Hopefully Courtney will call you."

"I hope so, but I won't be upset if she decides not to."

"Give her time."

"I am…I'm trying to, at least."

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Since I've been having problems with fanfiction taking away that damn line in the docs I have to improvise. Anyway, hope you enjoyed the chapter