Madara
White Noise
We were kind of late from having wasted hours just sitting on a playground. The moment I got there, my elder brother's old friend, a boy everyone called by his surname 'Hyuga', that normally trained with me pulled me away from Hashirama and took me to the lockers where I set up to fight.
The low buzz of talking and the shutters of clicking cameras went off like a backdrop. It was a lot louder than I'd ever remembered it being.
"Who's out there?" I asked.
"Like the whole goddamn city." Hyuga replied. "A lot of people are real excited to see you, you know?"
Me?
I rolled my eyes.
More like 'Tsubasa's little brother'. They're all just still in the middle of their 'good Samaritan' week. I bet they'll all show up to Izuna's first little league game, too...
"It's pretty cereal this time, bro." he said. "The guy's like massive."
"Who is he?"
"Akimichi, something." He said. "The kid's supposed to be like fourteen, right? And he looks like two sumo wrestlers had a love child."
I shoved my mouth guard in as I walked and rolled my eyes.
"You think you're up for this?" He asked.
"Please... They could put nine sumo wrestlers in there and I'd still kick all their asses."
"Far out." He replied, then he nudged me. "...Hey, sorry about everything with Tsubasa, man. I didn't know he-"
"Forget it." I said, quickly lacing my almost knee high shoes. "It's whatever."
"Well, I'm glad you're still boxing." Hyuga told me.
I set my feet firmly on the ground and continued walking through the narrow hall that led to the arena.
"Wouldn't stop it for the world." I replied.
As I got closer to the gate, the noise got louder. But it was white noise. Static. The kind that you couldn't pay attention to even if you wanted to. When I ducked under the ropes and actually set my Addias on the stage of the arena, that was when everything just exploded.
I blinked, seeing clearly for the first time the amount of people out there. Yelling.
What the hell are they saying anyway?
"KICK HIS ASS!"
I lowered my eyes to one boy with almost shoulder length brunette hair standing incredibly close to the ring and shook my head.
Of course, he would be the loudest.
My eyes locked on the boy standing in front of me with sandy colored hair and a gut twice the size of Jupiter AND it's moons.
He pointed his glove at me and then drug his hand across his neck.
I sighed.
So lame...
"On the count of three..." The referee began.
We simultaneously put our gloves up.
"Two..."
I could feel my heartbeat rising loud over the crowd until it was all white noise again. I couldn't explain why but any time I was in a high pressure situation, it was like that. I couldn't hear anything except my own body.
"One..."
We touched our gloves together. And then, like a friggin' nine year old, the guy pulls his arm back and tries to give me the haymaker of a lifetime right off the bat. I dodged it easily and tried to move around him but he kept coming at me with those wide, friggin' bear-claw punches.
The crowd was tense, probably thinking the same thing I was.
This guy's big so, if I get hit with one of these stupid things, it's probably over...
Another thing was that he was pretty fast. The reason he'd probably won so many matches wasn't just because he started off trying to throw his most powerful hit, it was also because he was quick enough with it to catch you off guard.
I ducked under his fourth one and broke into his space, hitting him hard in the ribs which was completely exposed.
The idiot doesn't realize how open those leave you.
Or maybe he did, because he only stumbled back momentarily before he came at me again, swinging.
The guy's so damn loaded, I'm going to have to throw like five of these straight just to get to him...
So, I did what I normally did when I was unsure about an opponent.
"You can still dance, can't you?" I asked him.
Bullshit them with insults.
"My baby brother can throw better than that... And he can actually hit someone."
I couldn't tell if it was getting to him. We moved around each other. Everyone was so loud, I could've screamed to him and no one would be able to hear me except maybe the referee and he didn't give a damn.
"Why doncha stop talking and go for one?" he asked me.
"I don't hit girls." I replied.
His brow furrowed.
"You little pussy, I should be saying that-"
But he was cut off as I lunged at him, going for a punch but psyching out at the last moment and not actually making contact. But he was so shaken, he stumbled back multiple steps and almost fell into the ropes.
"Oh, shit! You're really scared, aren't you, fatty?" I asked him.
He scowled, getting back into position.
"Gonna shit yourself, fatso?"
He put his fists up.
"Don't make me feel sorry for kicking a girl's ass, fat boy." I went on. "I don't think I could live with myself."
He dove at me, just like I was provoking him to, spinning his fists around like he was a freaking helicopter. I could tell my words had gotten to him at that point because he was completely off, just running on adrenaline and attitude. I ducked under them easily and got him in the same spot in his ribs again, this time it seemed to catch him a bit. I got him with two more punches in the stomach, which he was having a hard time protecting, probably because my attack area was so damn large. And when I went for the third one, his back hit the ropes and I let off, pretty certain I'd gotten him.
Outside the ring, it looked like everyone was perpetually in the air from having jumped out of their seats. The blare of the noise returned to me. I could hear everything clearer than antennae television, see everything clearer than a crisp homerun by your favorite ball team, taste everything clearer than... Okay, you get the point.
But what I could see clearer than all that was him, standing front and center. I had expected him to be pumping his fists in the air excitedly like a maniac or yelling or something characteristic of how he was so damn jolly all the time but instead, with the way he looked at me, there was nothing on his face except...awe. I think that was what it was anyway.
You're always watching me...
I found a smile spreading onto my face.
You must really, really...
At first his watching was so creepy to me. The way he looked, it was like he didn't want to look at anything or anyone else ever again... But slowly, it began to change. I didn't mind his watching.
I must really, really...
All it really made me want to do was watch him back. Watch him forever. Here or there or anywhere. Watch those large, deep brown eyes that were suddenly flicking over to my right frantically.
Wait... What's...?
I turned, coming face to face with the sleeper haymaker of a lifetime that caught me so hard it was like I was punched and the ground came up to slam into my back in the same instant.
"YOU CAN SUCK MY COCK, YA PUSSAAAAAAY!" A voice exclaimed as everything fizzed out.
Hashirama
Square One
"That was insane!" Tsubasa's friend, Hyuga, who normally helped Madara practice said.
"I know right? Did you see that fat kid?! Totally stellar!" I added.
"I saw some news reporters, too! What if this ends up in the paper?!"
"Can everybody shut up?" Madara asked, pressing the cold pouch to the cut above his eye. "My head feels like shit."
I grinned at him. He was sitting there on the bench in the locker room between us looking like the sorriest piece of shit the world had ever seen. He really caught a big one out there.
"Bet it feels like you got hit by a truck, huh?" I asked him.
"One more word..." He warned me.
"But you got him back though." Hyuga said, shrugging.
"Yeah, and he got him back, good, too. Honestly, Mada when I saw you hit the floor like that, I just knew you weren't getting up." I told him. "Total black saber!"
"Hell, I thought he died." Hyuga remarked.
"But then, right when the guy was about to count all the way to 10, you get up and just started whooping ASS!" I exclaimed.
"It was real copasetic, dude." Hyuga said, then he cocked his head. "But I've been trying to figure out all this time. What the hell had you all distracted in the first place?"
He was still massaging his fists which I guessed were still slightly sore from how hard he'd punched that bastard straight in his ten pile high blueberry pancake face.
"What do you mean, I wasn't distracted." He said, dropping the cold pack into the bucket next to him.
"Dude, you totally were. You were staring out into the audience in a daze."
I could see the tops of his ears tint red again... Like all the way back when I had kissed his cheek.
"Get your eyes checked." He muttered.
Hyuga just shrugged.
"Whatever. I'm heading out, alright?"
He picked up his bag and pressed his hands against the door that lead back into the arena where the clean-up crew was beginning to come out.
"I'm gonna dip in the showers." Madara mumbled.
I watched him get up off the bench and walk to the back of the locker room where I promptly heard a squeaky and most likely rusty pipe come to life and the whoosh of a shower echo through the locker room.
As I walked around the room, pacing, I found I couldn't really get that topic out of my head.
It was like when you feel like you have the answer to something. But you're not even sure what it is, let alone the question.
I replayed the fight in my head again. Madara was staring in my direction, he did kind of look like he was in a daze with the way his head was cocked, almost like he'd just taken a trip or something. The fat Akimichi kid he'd bashed open was hanging onto the ropes and struggling to get to his feet. The referee was counting him down. And then, he just shook his head and got up, just out of sheer willpower and cocked his fist back. Madara turned then, but not quick enough to avoid it and he was literally slammed down into the ground. Like... The guy was spread eagle. And in like two seconds, everything was turned on its head and suddenly he was getting the countdown. But again, with willpower, he got up on his feet and it was round two! But this time Madara wasn't playing at all. I'd seen him practicing so I knew the first round he was just watching the guy, trying to see what he was about and catch him off guard. But the second round? Madara wasn't watching shit anymore. He went all in and he was just way too fast. The fat kid had nothing on him. It was pretty sad actually. They had to stop the whole thing and call it a TKO...
"Hey, Hashi! Can you bring my bag here?"
I wound back around the lockers, found his bag and headed toward the back.
I remembered when the match was finished, turning around and looking at who was behind me... And three rows back I saw them. So why was I suddenly thinking I assumed the wrong thing?
The shower room was a community one with about a million spouts. I walked near it, looking over the steam to try to see Madara when a hand suddenly jumped out from the side and snatched the bag out of my hands.
"Okay, now step away from the shower." He ordered. "Now."
I smirked.
"You really can't be exposed around people, can you?" I asked teasingly.
He didn't respond. I leaned up against the wall next to the opening.
"That asshole probably ended up giving me a friggin' shiner." He complained.
I laughed.
"Yeah because shiners are just so unheard of in boxing."
"On my face they are."
I shook my head and it was silent for a moment. The water in the shower cut off. I listened to his rustling, probably toweling himself dry.
"Well..." I began. "At least you won. And then you and your Mother and little brother can talk to you about it all day."
He came out of the shower room wearing nothing but red and gray underwear and gave me a look as he walked by.
"It's not like I'm going to recap the whole thing to them."
My brow furrowed.
"Why would you need to?" I asked. "I mean, they both saw the whole thing themselves, right?"
He stopped walking and turned back to look at me very slowly.
"...What are you talking about?" He asked. "My family wasn't here."
"Your Mom was only about two rows behind me. Along with your brother and even those guys you like hanging out with so much." I told him as I neared him.
He continued looking down momentarily and then shook his head.
"Nah, you must've seen someone else."
This settles it though. It settles it completely. Because if he wasn't looking at his family behind me to get distracted, then who the heck was he looking at?
He dug into his back and slipped on a clean pair of gray Nike shorts with green stripes.
It was like that 'no way' moment. Both of us were having it. He was all 'no way' about his Mother actually getting her fat lazy ass up to come to his boxing match, probably because there could've been no way she'd even known about it, I mean who could've told her? And I was all 'no way' at the thought that he actually could've almost lost his boxing match because he was watching...me.
We both sat down on the bench between the two rows of lockers and straddled it with both of our legs on either side. He pulled a royal blue t-shirt out of his back and pulled it on over his head as I dipped my hand in the bucket next to us.
"You know, your shiner will stick around longer if you don't put a compress on it." I said, pulling the cold pack out and sticking it back to his forehead.
"This thing will probably stick around longer no matter what I do."
"Ah, I'd probably say only about five or six months...maybe years."
He smirked. I moved his hair out of his eye so I could reach the cut better. He gazed at me and then a funny feeling set in my stomach and I realized how he was staring at me... Like... He was expecting something. Or more so like he was expecting me to do something.
But... Hisa said...
"Queers are just weak hearted people who get tainted with the devil."
And also that...
"God punishes humans the same for both."
So I couldn't do anything. Ever since that time at the beach, I couldn't... But I couldn't deny that I'd thought about it. Madara's hand rose and covered mine which was pressing the cold pack to his forehead. Actually, it was like eating and breathing... I thought about it almost compulsively. Every single day, I wondered if I would be the weak hearted person Hisa said I was becoming...
"What's up with you? Five seconds passed and you haven't said or done anything completely ridiculous." Madara spoke up.
"I'm just thinking." I replied.
"What about?" he asked me.
I shook my head.
"I don't know..."
He gave me a funny look.
"Did you just...lie to me?" he asked.
It seemed to be amusing to him. He raised his eyebrows like he was truly surprised.
"Now I know you must be thinking about something heavy."
I lowered the cold compress from his face and tossed it into the bucket. He sighed over dramatically.
"I don't have to be the one to say it, do I?" he asked.
He put his hands together in a mock-romantic way.
"You can tell me anything, Hashirama. I'm always here for you." He said in that thick sarcastic tone that reminded me of the first time we met.
I smiled.
"Are you sure?" I asked.
"Dude, just give me the skinny already!"
"Okay... Okay... I wasn't completely lying. I don't really know what I'm thinking yet but... I think... Maybe I could clear my thoughts better if you helped me."
He cocked his head.
"How?" He asked.
I gripped the bench somehow feeling incredibly apprehensive.
"Just...close your eyes for a second."
He looked at me untrustingly but then shook his head and obeyed.
It was different for some reason. The first time I'd kissed him on the cheek and even at the beach, both of those times... I didn't need him to close his eyes or stay still. I didn't anything at all. I just...
"Well...?" Madara said impatiently.
But it was different. Those times it was innocent. I didn't really think about it. It was impulsive. I couldn't even really stop myself at all. It was pure. I didn't expect it to continue or anything. But this one... This one was a decision. This one was deciding to kiss him...knowing...knowing...that... That Hisa said...
"I'm getting old here..." Madara muttered.
That I might as well just be a murderer...
I reached over and touched his hair, so soft, so dark and delicate. I ran my hand through it and found the base of his neck which my fingers slid down. His ears reddened. There was a slight tremor to his body. But he didn't open his eyes. It was like he wasn't even breathing.
I leaned toward him. Taking an axe to the gates of hell and completely allowing whatever demons nested there to overtake me. With the low, yellow hum of the lights above us as our only audience, I kissed him. He went rigid and I could feel the warming of his face around my lips, the rushing of blood as his posture straightened and his hands pressed against my chest. My other hand, the one that wasn't stroking his neck and sliding into his hair was on his bare thigh, reaching for his crotch. He jolted underneath me, grabbing my hand.
"Hashi..." he said, pulling his lips away. "We... We shouldn't..."
He could probably feel it too. The difference in that kiss.
"I know." I whispered, allowing my lips to find his neck. "I know it's wrong but just trust me..."
His hands had been pressing against my chest to keep me away but then they softened, somewhat holding me against him as my lips made their way down his neck. It was only for a second though, then he shook his head.
"I... I can't..."
"Madara, it's okay..." I said quietly. "It's just me..."
He had been resting by sliding backwards along the bench but when I said that, he hesitated, allowing me to lean forward and kiss him the second time. And that kiss was different, too. Our mouths, slightly open, connected and my tongue met his. When that happened, he didn't try to push me away anymore. It was almost like he melted against me. My hand caressed his warm, bare chest, lovingly fresh from the shower he just took. And his spare hand settled on my waist, content at using the belt loop in my shorts to pull me more firmly against him.
It was beginning to come together during all that. All of the breathing and slight moaning and his hand slowly coming around to the front of my shorts and my hand already untying the knot on his. It was coming together. With our bodies pressed together and my excitement literally almost bursting through the seams of my shorts, I was beginning to see something I hadn't seen previously. Like a prior plane of existence or another dimension or something... Something that could explain how that could feel so good to me but then...
"MADARA?!"
It makes sense that we didn't hear it. Because... We were so into what we were doing. Everything else was like white noise. Static on television. Even the clear as day sound of a five to ten pound door swinging the fuck open and slamming the fuck closed right fucking next to us!
He shoved me immediately, like how a cat lands on its feet, I swear it could've been written into his DNA code or something.
He got up quickly, I could almost see his brain through his eyes moving through thousands and thousands of different excuses and a million different scenarios but he ended up just saying...
"...What do you want?"
My eyes turned then, pausing on our intruders and I found I wasn't surprised at who it turned out to be.
A light brown haired kid who normally wore a skully over his hair and colorful plaid buttoned up shirts, Hiruzen Sarutobi. And a kid with wavy black hair that he had styled in sort of a girl-ish way, like he spent hours in front of the mirror in the morning, Kagami Uchiha. And lastly, a kid with a scar on his chin who was always wearing t-shirts under his buttoned downs and couldn't be caught without an angry expression on his face, Danzo Shimura.
"What are you doing in here?" Danzo asked.
The other two, the lackeys, looked like they didn't even know where to begin. Madara glanced at me and then, seeming to mentally wipe my existence out of his brain, he snapped his fingers at them.
"Come on. Let's walk and talk." He said, going over to them and picking up his bag on the way.
You're probably thinking I stayed there like a good little housepet and waited for him to get back, right? Christ, you don't know me...
I snuck along the wall inside the hallway that led to the arena, near the ring, where every single audience member had already left. There, Madara talked to his friends.
"What... What's going on?" Hiruzen asked.
Madara rolled his eyes like it was the dumbest question on Earth.
"Nothing." He said. "And, anyway, what are you guys-"
"Do you think we're blind?" Kagami asked him. "You were just kissing that board shorts kid!"
His voice echoed throughout the arena.
"I wasn't, it was just-"
"What CPR?" Danzo asked him, actually showing something similar to a smile for once. "Were you suffocating?"
"Shut up, I said it wasn't-"
"Jesus, Madara! What the hell were you thinking?" Kagami asked him. "I mean... What are your parents going to think?!"
"Hey, shut the hell up, okay?!" He yelled. "And let me fucking talk!"
Everyone's voices subsided.
"It wasn't anything! He's just... He's a weirdo, okay? He thinks it's funny to do weird shit like that, I was trying to get him off me and he wouldn't stop."
I shifted, standing where I was in the hall. I felt a sweat prickling up all around my body. My eyes closed but my ears, extended, wanting to hear more.
"He's just all over me all the time. I don't know what his deal is but he doesn't have anything to do with me..."
Then he turned to Kagami.
"And if you say one word about this to anybody in my family, I swear you'll be waking up in the goddamn ER with no legs and half a brain."
Kagami backed up, palms in the air.
"Veg out, man, I mean... It just looked weird is all."
Hiruzen nodded.
"You're lucky we were the ones that saw you." He said, seeming to relax. "Or else some bad stuff about you really could've gotten around."
"Well, some bad stuff still could get out about you." Danzo said crossing his arms.
Madara turned to him. They stared each other down.
"But that's only if you decide not to come back... Right?"
Silence boomed through the arena. It wasn't really clear what was going to happen. But I knew from experience that if there was anything Madara hated, it was being told what to do.
"What's the skinny?" Madara finally asked.
"You come back to our team... And completely forget about that jive turkey. And we'll pretend we didn't see a thing."
"I already told you it was nothing."
Danzo shrugged.
"Hey, I don't know that for sure."
I knew Madara wanted to punch his lights out. I sure would've wanted to. But he held his ground, probably because punching him only would've made things worse.
"Fine." He said.
"Yes!" Kagami cheered.
"And in great time, too! We were just about to get a huge lead with Orange Sweater!" Hiruzen said.
Danzo just smirked, glad he'd gotten his way. They all began walking toward the back of the arena. But, as though sensing my presence, Madara glanced back and looked at me. Our eyes locked. Our hearts, which used to travel on the same wavelength, fumbled...and skipped a beat...and lost each other's signal. He continued walking... And again, I wasn't sure of anything. I thought I was seeing something, feeling something, understanding a bit more about myself... But before I could fully grasp it, come to terms with what it was, it all ended before it even started and I was back at square one. The empty square. The square of disaster.
Madara
In The End...
In the end, it all went back to the beginning. Except that I spent way less time directing our 'gang' and more time just letting Danzo run rampant. Which he embraced fully. New rules. We do everything his way. We wear green. We use hockey masks instead of black wool caps. We carry loaded guns all the time. We don't hesitate to fire off a warning shot. And that would've been fine if it wasn't for the fact that...
"I think there are more than one 'Orange Sweater'." Hiruzen had said one day.
It's about to turn into a gang war.
"How do you figure that?" I asked.
"Because every time we run into the guy, his weight and height are a bit off." Hiruzen said, then he gave me a funny look. "Can't you tell?"
There was one picture we had of Orange Sweater. The first one we took when Danzo first put ammo in his gun. It was blurry but the person was thin and kind of short. Not the thicker body we encountered earlier that day.
"I noticed that, too." Danzo said as he turned around in the desk chair he'd brought in.
It was probably the closest thing to a throne that his money could buy...
Kagami frowned.
"There might be a whole gang of them... You know, maybe we should just turn over all of our thoughts to the police and get out of it." Kagami said, for once sounding serious.
"What thoughts?" Danzo asked. "We don't even have suspects."
"But weren't you the one who wanted to involve the police in the first place?" I asked him.
"Not for this one." Danzo said. "These guys are our rivals..."
There are no rivals in crime, you idiot...
"Tomorrow after school, we're gonna stake out for these guys. Guns loaded. If we can get one, we might be able to get him to out all of his friends." He said, then strangely he smiled. "We're gonna be having some new recruits soon anyway, so it won't be hard for us."
Recruits...
My mind flashed back to a conversation I'd had the day before. As soon as I'd gotten home with Danzo and the others. Danzo said...
"And also, just as reassurance for your position..." he pointed then.
I turned to see where his finger was directed. At Izuna practicing some skateboard trick off the edge of the driveway.
"You understand, don't you?" Danzo said, crossing his arms. "We need some extra weight around, to do other things."
But I knew what it was... It was nothing more than a way to keep me locked in, just in case I still decided to go traitor.
I could've said no. I could've stood up for my younger brother like the elder brother I was supposed to be. I could've told him to suck my cock, drop off a mountain, kick his dick, punch his lights out, anything... Anything other than what I did say.
"I don't care." I mumbled, looking away.
"Good." Danzo said, before he dropped off the porch and went down the walk. "Hey, Izu! Let me talk to you for a second..."
I don't know what he said to him. But ever since then, I noticed one of my hoodies was missing from my closet. And he barely talked to me. He barely even looked at me.
"You know, there's two kinds of people in this world, Danzo." Kagami said. "People in jail and people not in jail. And honestly, with the way you're running stuff, I feel like we're about to become the other kind of people."
Hiruzen laughed.
He rolled his eyes.
"Whatever."
Kagami and Hiruzen often dropped hints like that as a way to get me to be myself again. But I wasn't even sure if who I was around them before was myself.
This guy... This one guy... He's confused me so much I don't even know who I am anymore.
I still saw Hashirama in school. Often times, actually. Even when I'd rather have seen anyone in the world except him. It was like fate just dragged us back together.
Hiruzen nudged me.
"Look, dude. Look at that..."
I raised my head to one of the lockers near the main exit of the building. Hashirama's locker. Someone had spray painted something on it in huge letters.
"Oh, wait!" Kagami said, snickering. "Here he comes!"
There was a small crowd gathered. People curious to see what would happen when he saw it. Hashirama stopped in front of his locker cocking his head at the large, messily spray painted words: "QUEER" in red dripping letters and laughed.
"Really funny guys!" He called.
The crowd around him snickered... But unlike the first day of school, it was clear as day no one was laughing with him anymore. He opened his locker and...
What the hell!?
A vat of rotten food was pulled off the top shelf and fell onto the floor in front of him. That was when, like a timer, everyone burst into laughter. Almost like they were expecting it. Kagami was almost rolling on the floor. Hiruzen grinned but then, seeing my expression, he quickly stopped smiling.
"Let's go find Danzo." He said, gripping my arm and pulling me away.
And that was only the day right after my boxing match. It couldn't have spread around that quickly. Unless one of the three did it... And it was clear as day who'd probably done it. It made me want to kick myself. I was so hasty in trying to protect my own reputation, I never factored into the equation that Danzo would think to out Hashirama in my place.
The bell rang. Everyone rushed to class. He knelt there...alone. Trying to pull his textbooks out of that crap.
But it was perfect, though. A surefire way to turn him into a social pariah no one would dare even step in the same room with. A surefire way to keep me with them and far away from him. Sometimes I couldn't believe I had ever doubted how far he would take his conniving.
"Did you hear the board short's kid is a faggot?" One red haired kid asked.
"Dude, I know! And you think you know a guy..."
But it wasn't like I was going to stand up anytime soon and shout everyone down. Some people can't practice what they preach. Some people aren't strong enough to be the change they want to see in the world. Hashirama said that himself. So he couldn't blame me if i... if I just...
Watched with the other kids as he sat down in his desk next to me only to have it scream, screech and explode under him, reduced to nothing but bits of metal and broken wood.
Mr. Uzumaki rolled his eyes.
"Who did this to his chair?!" He yelled. "Who?!"
But no one cared to listen to him. They continued whispering and snickering as he got up and, because of a lack of seats, was forced to sit in the front of the room next to the board.
But you really can't blame me... Blame me if I...
Watched him sit up there alone and get consistently pelted with spit balls. Or watched us go to every class after that with some new, embarrassing thing happening to him. Pushpins in his chair, spiders in his hair, an egg somehow falling into his lap at lunch, someone's leg just so happening to stick out and trip him during gym, people smacking his books out of his hands, and those words on his locker: "QUEER" somehow changing to "FAGGOT" throughout the course of the day.
Hashirama...
And maybe it was because of that question hanging over my head. But I didn't want to be the leader anymore. I didn't want to be anything anymore. I let Danzo do what he wanted and my mind wandered. Constantly watching him... Even though... After that day... He never ever set his eyes on me again.
Do you blame me?
Hashirama
Hello Again
My feet slapped against the linoleum steps firmly echoing throughout the staircase. I was already breathing hard like I had asthma or something and my legs felt like the wanted to fall off and my stomach was about to turn over but my brain kept screaming for me to run.
"He's gonna get away! Hurry!"
I almost tripped and busted my ass on the last step. Stairs were like a death trap for me. Honestly, whoever invented stairs was just out to get me. But I was able to get over it and shove the door open. A thickly cool breeze rushed onto me, blowing my hair off my forehead and I sprinted across the roof of one of the tallest buildings in the area.
The door slammed back open behind me and about three pairs of feet slapped against the concrete behind me.
"Corner him!"
Maybe it was because I'd watched way too many action movies when I was younger but, looking at the gap between the building I was standing on and the building next to it, I was pretty sure I could make it.
"It's just like the tree and the window. Just like the tree and the window." I whispered to himself.
"Wait, is he gonna jump?"
I got to the last bit of cement my feet could stand on and pushed up from the ground. Or at least that's what I would've done if I was freaking INSANE.
"Holy Shit!" I shouted, feet skidding right toward the edge of the building. "Fuck, Fuck, Fuck..."
I normally didn't curse so heavily but... Oh, who the fuck am I kidding, I was gonna DIE!
"Grab him!"
I raised my hands, backing up as far as I could as they corned me to the edge.
"Uh... Can we talk?" I asked.
I looked up at them then. The people who almost inadvertently killed me. They all wore dark blue jeans, timberland boots, and green tops. One was wearing a green jacket, the other a hoodie, and the other a t-shirt.
They were all silent.
"You know... Queers are like murderers... So if you kill me, wouldn't that make you just as bad as a queer?"
One of them stepped toward me threateningly.
I glanced below me, surprised at what I saw and then smirked. It was like, suddenly, God was giving me a pass or something. I mean, it wasn't the safest way to go down, but it certainly was safer than trying to jump ten feet across nothing but the gates of hell.
Just as they were about to reach for me, I stepped back off the building, foot resting on nothing but air, and waved as I plunged down. You could've made Halloween masks out of their faces. They looked like they'd seen death! Which they probably would've if the gutter pipe to the building wasn't directly under me and cut away from the building in a way that I could grasp and slide safely the entire way down. Hell, what am I talking about, safely?! I honestly thought I was going to die...
My heart was in my chest as my feet pounded against the ground in the alley way.
"...I'm getting too old for this..." I groaned as I shook the stinging pain out of my feet.
I backed up, seeing their masks bent over the edge but not one of them dared to follow me. One of my widest grins stretched over my face as I pointed to my ass.
"Kiss it, you assholes!" I shouted.
One of them pointed at me.
"You better hope you're not still down there... Faggot."
They walked off then, content at scaring the living shit out of me, which is what I'm sure they wanted. I broke into a run, taking their advice at trying not to be down there but when I spun around the corner I ran into the most random person I'd ever expected to see. The person had their back turned to me, stuffing something into a backpack and then turned, deep red hair falling over their shoulder.
"Mito?!" I said at the same time she said: "Hashirama?"
A car drove by quickly, honking as it did. The burst of sound reminded me that I was on the run.
"I, uh, have to go." I said, running around her.
She grabbed my wrist firmly.
"Wait, I haven't seen you in ages, Hashi, how-"
I looked over her head frantically.
"I know, I know, but this really isn't a-"
"I'll come with you." She said, nodding seriously.
It was one of those times where you don't care what the hell someone is talking about as long as they talk about it while you're doing what you want to do... Which for me was get the hell out of there.
I broke into a jog and she ran with me, still holding my hand. In the bustling city of Westside Konoha, it wasn't too difficult to blend into the mesh of suits and ties on their breaks or blinking turning signals on cars or dogs being walked on their way to the central park.
I was lucky enough that the city bus had just stopped at the stop when we got there. Completely out of breath, we both got on the bus and made our way all the way to the back. I just had to stare up at the ceiling of the bus for a few seconds... Really, it was that intense.
"What the heck are you running away from?"
I turned my head, finally realizing who I was talking to.
It had been forever and a day since I'd seen her. Seriously... We went way back, even further than kindergarten. Her family used to live right next to mine so we'd been friends since the diaper years. Even when she moved when we were in third grade, we were still friends at school. But I hadn't really spoken to her or any of the rest of the crew much after the new busing system had me going to NorthSide Konoha High School instead of SouthSide where she lived and where I should've been going. The fact that I ended up running into her in WestSide Konoha was completely lost on me.
"Nothing." I said, pushing my hair off my forehead. "Just this whole...crazy thing."
She laughed.
"Crazy? Remember what you and I used to do? I honestly don't think it could get much worse."
I grinned.
"Speaking of that, still hanging out with a bunch of heads?" I asked.
She rolled her eyes.
"You're one to talk. All of your friends are heads. Remember?"
"Was." I corrected. "I...haven't really caught up with them in a long time."
She pulled a small, hand mirror out of her purse and looked at her face.
"Really? Who are your new friends?"
"Ah... No one really."
She raised her eyebrows.
"So you've just been alone all this time?" she asked, smirking like she didn't believe me.
"I mean... No. There was this one guy but... It didn't really work out well."
"How'd you figure that?" she asked, using a cotton ball to fix a make-up smudge on the corner of her mouth.
I turned my head and found myself gazing out of the window.
It's all because I'm an idiot... Really...
"It's a really long story. I...don't really feel like talking about it." I said quietly.
She reached over and tugged on my ear.
"You're turning red." She said, smiling widely.
Suddenly, my palms felt sweaty. I rubbed them on my shorts.
"Sooo... What brings you to Westside anyway?" I asked, eager to change the topic.
"Business." She said, shrugging. "I had to pick up something from the post for my Dad."
"Dad?" I repeated.
For as long as I'd known her, she hadn't had a father.
"I never mentioned this to you, but when I first moved away, it was to move closer to my Father." She explained. "My Mom wanted me to finally have a relationship with him."
"And how's that going?" I asked.
"Shitty." She said, grinning. "He's a real stickler... Probably because he's a high school teacher."
We both snickered.
"So, I see you're still wearing your swim shorts every day."
I patted my dark purple shorts.
"Yup. Perfect for surfing."
"Tobirama still addicted to the water, too?"
"Nah... He's into baseball now. The little twerp."
She laughed, light gray eyes piercing into mine.
"And what about my favorite little crybaby?"
"Still crying." I replied.
"Naturally." She said, giggling. "So, are you going home?"
I nodded.
"Can I come with?"
I turned to her, surprised to see that she was actually serious. I guess when you spend an entire day flinching from people just walking by and afraid to open your locker, that kind of thing can trip you up.
"What for?" I asked her.
She shrugged.
"I guess, now that I ran into you again, I'm just interested in what you're getting up to." She told me. "I tried to reach you a couple times. But no one was ever home when I went."
I couldn't help but feel kind of guilty when she said that. Almost like I was obligated to let her come over. I mean, we'd been pretty close friends all the way back when.
It wasn't long until the bus dropped us off close enough to walk to my home and she smiled, taking in the bright sunny day and adjusting her brown leather over the chest purse on her shoulder.
"Same old house, huh." She said, gazing at my one story piece of crap.
"Don't stare too long, you'll notice the moss growing up the side and the bird shit on the shutters."
She laughed.
"Stepmom still dragging her feet on getting that renovation?"
"Dragging her feet? More like dragging her whole damn body."
I pushed the door open, which surprisingly, was unlocked and came face to face with the topic of conversation who was carrying a plate of dirty dishes.
We both grinned at her sheepishly.
"Heyyy... Hisa." I said.
She gave me a suspicious look but when she glanced at Mito standing next to me, her expression broke into complete confusion.
"...Mito? Is that you?"
Mito grinned, flipping her hair over her shoulder.
"Good Afternoon, Ms. Senju."
"Well... Come on in!" She exclaimed. "Let me put these in the sink so I can give you a hug!"
Which she hurriedly did and then, as I closed the door behind us, ran back up to her and threw her arms around her.
"Oh, you've gotten so big now!"
"Don't tell me that, Hisa, I'll want to shed some pounds!"
"Oh, jump back!" Hisa said. "You look fine!"
I headed toward the refrigerator, completely content with using food to distract myself from all the girl talk. As I set my backpack on the floor, the sunglasses, which I normally kept in the outer pocket, bounced out and clattered to the floor. I had that time freeze moment. You know when you think you broke something you dropped and you just look at it... Like, you can mentally reverse what just happened even though it's impossible. I slowly bent down and picked it up, expelling a huge breath of air when I realized they weren't broken, and slid them on top of my head as a better keeping space.
"Nice shades." Mito suddenly said, leaning over the counter. "Where'd you get them?"
"Uh... Just... A friend gave them to me." I said.
"The same 'mysterious' friend?" She asked, smiling widely.
I stood up straight to see Hisa eyeing me strangely from the sink. It was one of those looks you couldn't really tell what the reasoning behind it was. So, I chose to lie. Just in case. Even though people don't normally tell you, lying is usually safer than telling the truth if you aren't certain what someone's thinking.
"No, another friend." I said quickly. "Uh... Anyway... I have some homework to do, so-"
"Why don't you spend the day with Mito, Hashirama?" My Stepmother asked quickly. "Since you haven't seen her in such a long time."
Bad idea... Really bad idea... See, it wasn't like I had other plans or anything, but if there was one thing that week taught me it was that being out in the open was a huge no-no.
"I, uh, sort of have to-"
"Come on, Hashirama, your homework can wait." Hisa prodded me.
"I know but, I just, uhm-"
"It's casual, Hisa." Mito told her. "I have something to do later anyway."
"Well, why don't you guys just stay inside for a bit?" She asked. "I can bake some cupcakes."
I raised my eyebrows.
"Are you sure? Isn't your second shift supposed to be starting soon?" I asked her.
She glanced at her watch and inaudibly cursed.
"You're right!" she said. "I have to go. But have fun kids!"
She pushed the backdoor open and sped out toward the garage. Mito peeked around.
"So where is the oh-so-mature Tobirama and his innocent side-kick Itama?"
"They should be at Tobirama's little league practice." I said.
Hisa had honestly felt pretty bad about Tobirama struggling so hard just to get across town and go, so she decided to take her break at a different time so she could drive him to his practice. I didn't usually go with them. Hisa was always suspicious over why I always had "some excuse".
She clasped her hands behind her back and walked in the direction of my bedroom.
"Any idea when they're coming home?" She asked.
I followed after her as she took the liberty of pushing my door open. She was like that. She never really waited for anything.
"Madara's mom usually drops them off in like an hour." I said.
Her ears perked up as she nudged Tobirama's backpack to the side.
"Madara?" she repeated. "Who is that?"
"Huh?" I asked.
She plopped down on my bed.
"You said 'Madara', who is he?"
I blinked.
Did I say Madara?
"Uh... No one really."
She shifted on my bed, just so happening to lean back in such a way that one of her hands slid underneath my pillow. She grabbed, fingers closing around something, which she pulled out. My eyes widened as it locked on the bright red thing.
"What's this?" she asked, beginning to open it.
"Don't touch that!" I exclaimed, reaching for it.
She grinned. And I could tell we were already on different pages. See, she thought I was joking. I wasn't joking.
I launched myself over her in an effort to grab the binder and literally almost snapped her neck in the process.
"What's in here?" She asked, trying to hold it away from me. "Is it really that serious?"
I snatched it away from her.
"Just... Don't worry about it." I said, throwing it up on the top bunk, Itama's bed. "It has Itama's doctor's appointments and stuff in there. Hisa would kill me if I got it messed up... That's all."
She crossed her legs. She had on these really short pair of pinstriped shorts and brown timberland boots.
"What's up with you today?" she asked. "You seem so finicky."
I stuffed my hands into my pockets.
"I'm not. It's just-"
"You can tell me." she said, offering me a small smile. "I promise I won't tell."
I rubbed my sweaty palms on my pants as I slowly dropped onto the bed.
I already knew I couldn't tell her everything. Next thing I knew, she'd be chasing me around the freaking city screaming 'faggot' everywhere...
"I don't know how I could explain it to you."
She cupped her chin in her palm.
"Well... Maybe if we talk about something small, first? Like, can I smoke in here, or...?"
I laughed.
"Same old Mito..." I said, grinning. "You know Hisa doesn't give a damn."
She immediately dug into her purse and pulled out a baggie.
"Do you have something I could roll this up in?"
I dipped under my bed momentarily and pulled a shoe box cover out.
"So, are you still dropping acid, too?" I asked.
"Are you still acting like a narc?" she wanted to know.
I grinned.
"Don't hate me because I'm good at avoiding peer pressure!"
"It's not peer pressure, it's cooling off, brother." She said, pulling a one dollar bill out of her wallet.
She promptly used it to roll up her mary jane.
"I guess that's just the only thing we never really could see eye to eye on." I suggested.
"Nah, I get what you mean. Kills brain cells. Fucks up your mentality. But hey, hippies don't need many brain cells anyway. We got enough heart all on our own."
Her mention of the word "hippie" got my attention. I recalled, when we were younger, that she used to be pretty solidly "peace and love" and all that jazz.
"So you're still picketing outside city hall?" I asked her.
She frowned slightly right before she lit the joint and took a hit.
"Picketing?" She repeated, she blinked rapidly with the smoke in her face. "...Did I?"
I laughed.
"Dude, yeah, remember? You used to braid your hair in that halo thing and go passing flowers around to people wearing moccasins and tie-dye t-shirts."
"Hey!" She said, holding up a finger. "Don't diss the tie-dye, those shirts taught me life."
"So you're still about that?"
She paused momentarily and then, finally, after taking two more hits in silence, she looked up at me.
"Yes and no." she told me. "I mean, I still believe it. That this world would be a lot better if everyone was just a lot kinder to each other and there were no more wars or arguments or hatred."
Then she shrugged.
"But handing out flowers to people doesn't do a damn thing." She grinned at me. "...Why didn't you tell me how stupid I looked when I was doing that?"
I laughed.
"You wouldn't have listened to me anyway!" I pointed out. "Besides... I really admired what you did."
She raised her eyebrows.
"Really?"
"Well, yeah. I mean... To me, you seemed like one of the few people in this world who could actually 'practice what they preach'."
She smiled.
"I still practice it. Just...not by handing out flowers." She looked down at her blunt. "Life's about changing, you know? Growing up and realizing that the reason there is no peace is because sometimes war is necessary."
"Wow." I said, smile fading. "That's almost...completely opposite from before."
"Not completely." She said. "I think that, if my end goal is still the same, it doesn't matter if I'm handing out primroses or hydrogen bombs."
She looked at me in the eyes then.
"At least I'm trying, you know?"
I nodded slowly.
"Yeah, I hear you loud and clear."
"But you just don't agree?"
"Yes and no." I said, mostly to mock her.
She rolled her eyes and tilted her mary jane toward me.
"Want a hit?"
I stared at her for a moment and then nodded, grasping it firmly between my pointer finger and thumb.
"Fuck it." I told her. "I seriously need a cool off."
"I should put this shit in the daily press. The day Hashirama Senju succumbs to peer pressure." Mito joked.
"It's still an accomplishment after five plus years of having you and our other junky friends as role models." I laughed, before pushing it past my lips.
She glanced around my room and her eyes locked on a white-washed jean jacket hanging on the post of my bed.
"This is hip." She said, checking it out. "When did you get this?"
I stared at it for a while, feeling strangely overwhelmed with emotion as I blew the smoke out and it swirled in my field of vision.
"Just a while ago." I replied, taking another hit.
She turned and smiled at me.
"I feel like no time has passed at all. You're still my Hashirama even after all this time."
I was still looking at the jean jacket, but then I directed my eyes to her.
"Your Hashirama?"
She grinned as I took another breath of the smoke.
"Yup. Little guy with a big mouth that always lands him right in detention." She said, snickering.
"You used to be sitting in there right next to me, you know." I reminded her.
"Yeah, trying to give you a break!" She pointed out.
We laughed, thinking about old times. But as I did, I couldn't help but inwardly disagree with her. Disagree that... I really wasn't 'her' Hashirama anymore. That boy she remembered. Inside I was becoming someone a lot different. Someone she may never be able to understand. And with what she said earlier, I wondered if the same was happening to her.
She leaned in closer to me, plucking the joint out of my mouth.
"Are you sure you haven't found any new friends?" She asked me, batting her eyelashes.
We stared at each other. I didn't say anything. I wasn't really sure what to say. Lie, tell the truth, I didn't know. With the marijuana making everything all squiggly, I wasn't even sure which was which in my head.
"You know what? I just realized I have to go." She said, getting up off the bed.
I blinked at her.
"Go where?"
"My Dad wants me to go to the post office. Mail off some package or something. Anyway, I'll just stop by around this time tomorrow. You should be here at the same time, right?"
"Uh... My life is pretty unpredictable. I'd say just be thirty minutes late just in case." I told her.
She stared at me for a long time and then put a hand on my head.
"Don't do anything I wouldn't do, okay, Hashi?"
I nodded, watching as she walked around me and my bed. I stayed there, seated until I heard the backdoor open and close.
It wasn't too bad at first. But the longer I sat there, the more I felt like my brain was doing freaking backflips and cartwheels in my head. Things happened in clips. Movie clips. I pulled my shirt off. Then I was gripping the edge of the bunk bed and knocking my head against it. My shirt came back on. My red binder was in my hands and I was flipping through the pages, my pencil began like a drawing motion but instead of drawing there were words... Lots of them. All over the pages. Really large and twisted. Page after page after page until the binder was on the floor. I was grabbing my hair. My feet tapped all around the floor, all around the house, all around and around and around. And then, suddenly, the phone was in my hand. I was dialing a number and it was ringing... Ringing...
"Hello?"
"Uh.. Uhm... Hey, uhm... Is Madara there?"
"Who is this?"
"Yeah... uh... I'm uhm... Hashirama?"
"What the hell do you want?"
"I... Just... I really, really just-"
"Why don't you get a FUCKING girlfriend and stop FUCKING stalking him, you FAGGOT!?"
There was a dial tone. But that yell, that statement. It was the kind that made you wonder about yourself. Why did I do that? Why? I just wanted to tell him I was sorry. That I was sorry... But... Why did I think that he would want to hear that? ...Why? He hates me. Everyone does. And... That's that.
Madara
I'm Done Playing God
I wonder what would've happened if I chose Hashirama instead of myself.
"Go, go go!" Kagami yelled.
Gun shots rang out in the air, it sounded like a freaking bomb went off.
I wonder if I would've been fine handling all the bullshit he has to deal with everyday along with him...by his side.
"You can't be serious, Madara! Come back!" Hiruzen exclaimed.
Everyone was ducking but I was standing and running, running toward our threat.
And more importantly than that, I wonder if I'd be caught in a friggin' gunfight because of Danzo's wayward and out of control fuck ups!
It was like a repeat of the first time we'd seen Orange Sweater. Except this time, Danzo and I didn't argue over the best course of action. He simply said:
"We're doing my plan. Do you remember it?"
And everyone nodded. And I mentally kept imagining I had my guitar in my hands, strumming the cords to the song I promised to learn for Hashirama.
I learned it, you know? I did but...
"Okay, so on the count of three, we flood him." Danzo said.
But it's too late to show it to you... Because...
We jumped up, coming up around the car with our guns raised.
I was a jerk.
"Hands up, you bastard!" Danzo yelled. "Get your hands up!"
The person paused, crowbar in hand. While Danzo and I kept our guns on the person, Hiruzen and Kagami spread out, in search for helpers since Hiruzen had suggested that there may be more than one. Which there most likely was. It was actually a pretty obvious observation, one I'd made almost right after our first encounter with the person. Orange Sweater turned around slowly, wearing their classic sweater, a pair of black sweat pants that seemed incredibly baggy and a black face mask to shield their face, akin to our hockey masks.
"And you better drop that shit this time, asshole!" Danzo went on.
The person slowly bent down, slowly, slowly, allowing the crowbar to reach the ground but as they were doing it, I could clearly see them reaching back with the other hand, up into their sweater where, when they bent over it, looked like they may have been wearing a backpack or something underneath it.
I analyzed the situation in my brain. Two circumstances, either the bastard would pull out a fake and try to punk us or they were serious as hell and one of us was going to drop like a fly in a lantern.
Honestly... I just don't give enough of a fuck to truly figure this out.
I tucked my gun into my back pocket and turned around heading for the car again. I snapped my fingers at Hiruzen and Kagami who were both closer to it than Orange Sweater.
"Take cover." I told them calmly.
Danzo turned around, giving me an enraged look.
"Where the hell are you going, you traitor!?" He exclaimed.
"I'm not in the mood to die today." I said dully, pointing.
He turned back around, shocked to see Orange Sweater holding up a gun at him, like I'd expected. And then, like Hiruzen expected, and quicker than a mob, more orange sweaters surfaced, crowding around the first one like a huddle. They all slowly, one by one, took out their guns.
"Do you think they're for real?" Kagami asked.
"Danzo will be the first one to find out." I replied.
Kagami shook his head.
"We gotta get out of here."
The only way that was possible was to make a distraction and also discover if they were really packing heat or not. I looked up over their heads at the expensive looking, three story, bungalow they were steady trying to break into. I aimed my gun at one of top windows, right above where they were standing, and shot at it.
Kagami's hands flew to his ears.
"Ah! Are you trying to blow my fucking eardrums out?!"
The glass fell onto them, shattering, giving Danzo enough time to hightail his ass out of there and messily skid over the hood of the car and down to where I was. But when it was all over that was when one of them pointed at us and shot.
"Fuck!" Hiruzen exclaimed. "Fuck! They really have ammo, man!"
And that wasn't all, once the first one went on with it the others pulled out guns and pointed them at us, too.
"They're walking toward us!" Danzo exclaimed, pointing.
And just by looking at his face I could tell he didn't have any ideas. And it pissed me the fuck off.
Not so easy being the leader now, is it?
"We're gonna fucking die. We're all gonna fucking die..." Danzo whispered to himself.
"Well, don't panic." Hiruzen said, grabbing his arm. "Who called the police? Kagami?"
"I didn't know you guys wanted me to do it right now!" Kagami said.
"Fuck, Kagami!" Danzo exclaimed, slapping him in the back of the head. "What the hell are we going to do?!"
Slowly, everyone's eyes turned to me. It was then that I realized what it was. I mean, I always knew what it was. It was always perfectly clear to me. But it was like it was splashed in my face, thrown, really. Danzo was such a cowardly fuck, he'd never fit to be a leader unless he was off the battlefield, in a room full of KGB where he could be protected and waited on hand and foot. And he was also a selfish piece of shit. When I started this, I told them all...
"We have to make the world better."
I honestly said that.
"Not just for us, but for our little siblings and kids and... Forever onwards. If we can crush the evil, grind it out of the world to the point that everyone sees each other as equals. That's freedom, guys. That's...life."
And they all nodded. And then we started, catching criminals, threatening them to act right, squaring up, peeling out, lying to our families, staying out late. But being heroes to ourselves. Being righteous to our cause. Which had meaning. Which had purpose.
Bullets shattered the windows over our head.
But this... What Danzo has created... It has no meaning.
I leaned up on my haunches trying to see through the window as best as I could and not get my head blown off.
And it's not what I meant at all.
And as I watched, I noticed something. A key thing.
And it's not who I am.
"Someone's going to have to be bait while everyone else books it. Worse comes to worse, those people will call the police and hopefully they can get here before too much blood is lost." I said.
There was silence. Kagami stared at me dumbfound.
"...So who's gonna do it?" He asked, as if there was no way in hell it'd be him.
Danzo was completely silent. He didn't say a damn thing. Didn't even open his mouth.
Hiruzen sighed.
"...I guess I'll do it."
Everyone's eyebrows raised at him.
"Danzo and Madara have to be alright to make up the plans. And Kagami's better at-"
"Better at what?" Kagami interrupted. "Cracking jokes? Dude, if anyone's the weakest link, it's me."
"But I can..." Hiruzen's words trailed off to me.
I looked at Danzo again. Where his hands were balled into fists and shaking. Slowly, his eyes rose to mine.
I'm not really sure who I am... But I know who I'm not... And that's a coward. That's a bloody filthy low-down rotten piece of shit coward like that idiot shaking and his shitting his fucking pants right now.
"Look." I said turning around. "You both are only good for sidekick shit and you suckass yourselves so just shut the hell up and get out of here like good little lackeys."
Strangely, Hiruzen grinned and Kagami all but launched himself onto me and hugged me.
"You don't know how happy it makes me to hear you cuss me out!" Kagami exclaimed. "He's back!"
I shrugged out of his grip.
"I'm going in. And don't even bother calling the cops, I won't have a scratch on me." I told them, getting to my feet.
So this is it.
"Run as fast as you can toward the car across the street." I told them. "Duck and hide there."
And that was when Kagami said "Go, go, go!" and Hiruzen said "You can't be serious, Madara! Come back!" but Danzo didn't say anything.
No one needed to tell him twice, his ass was basically already behind the car. I ran the opposite direction from them, toward their guns. I could already see what types they were from where I was standing. One was a six-shooter, the other was a pistol, and the one that was shooting had a magnum, like ours.
They were paying attention to the others running across the street, not realizing I was coming up on the other side of them. And by the time the only one I was heading for, the original Orange Sweater, who'd been smart enough to hide the gun in their back waistband, turned around and saw me, I had already grabbed their arm and hiked it up behind their back and used my other arm to wrap it around their neck. They pulled the trigger and the gun shot out to the right of me. The other two, unsure about what to do, just watched me as I edged toward them, using the original as a barrier. Like idiots. One of them threw their gun at me, I pushed the hostage I had into the way of it so that they were hit in the face.
"Ahhh!"
The other one ran for me and I threw the original orange sweater at him, freeing my hands to grab the collar of the one that threw the gun at me, knee them in the stomach, trip them over my foot and promptly step between their legs to hold them still.
"AHH! Shit! My fuckin' balls!" He cried out.
The one that ran for me, after getting up from falling all over original orange sweater dove at me and I promptly punched him in the face and while he reached up, grabbing his nose, I turned him around and used him as a human shield against the original, who held their loaded gun out at me.
"I wanna have kids, dude! Please!" The guy beneath me shouted.
"The other two guns are fakes, right?" I asked, edging toward them.
I stared into the black face mask, trying to discern the eyes beneath them. I slowly let up off the guy underneath me.
"Your gun is the only one with bullets. Your six shooter. And that tells me something." I told him, struggling to keep the one in my grip still. "That you probably really, really believe in whatever you're trying to do."
But this person isn't anywhere near as strong as I thought they would be. Neither of them are.
Blood oozed out of the face mask of the one I was holding, I might've actually broken that nose. I edged closer, watching as they seemed to gaze at me. Gun slightly lowering.
"But running around shooting in the air and having backup with fake guns doesn't represent your cause." I went on. "It just makes you look like a stupid child."
They gripped their gun harder.
"You aren't shit unless you 'practice what you preach'." I told them.
Strangely, they softened again. I didn't hesitate. I took that moment to rush them, grab their gun, and bash it across their face. Only a second passed before original Orange Sweater dropped to his knees and fell, passed out.
I tripped the one in my hand, pushing him to the ground and picked up the gun the original was holding.
"Stay down." I said, pointing at the other two. "Move an inch and I swear I'll cut you the fuck in half."
"Calm down, man... Just calm down." Said the one who almost got his balls squashed.
"I'm calm." I said, walking toward him. "Completely calm."
"Whoa... Wait... What are you-"
I patted him down, sticking my fingers in his pockets to find a wallet.
"Only twenty dollars? What is it with broke people today?" I asked, dropping the wallet on his face.
"You're telling me..." He muttered.
"Alright, roll over. Face on the ground." I said.
They both obeyed. I leaned over the one with the broken nose and pulled on their face mask, but as I did, I realized it was less like a mask and more like a tight, form-fitting shirt that extended into a mask. Impossible to pull off unless I took his whole shirt off.
I raised my eyebrows.
"Hmm."
These guys might actually be smarter than I gave them credit for.
"Count to 500. Move and you won't have to worry about passing on kids, you damn criminals."
"You're one to talk! You just robbed me!"
"Shut your damn mouth." I said, turning around.
"One...two...three..." I heard them mumbling.
I turned and took my time walking across the street, past the large houses with gigantic porches and lawns and mailboxes and backyards and past the sirens that inevitably arrived, though the Orange Sweaters were probably long gone, and past the train tracks and it wasn't until I entered the parking lot of the Kroger's, the same one we kicked that rapist's ass in, that I found them all waiting for me.
"He wasn't shitting us... He really doesn't have a scratch on him." Kagami said in awe.
"Did the cops get them?" Hiruzen asked.
"Probably not." I replied. "But it doesn't matter. If they're smart, they'll never try to mess with you guys again."
Hiruzen and Kagami nodded in agreement but Danzo looked up at me suspiciously. His eyes narrowed.
"You guys?" he repeated. "Don't you mean 'us'?"
"No." I said, taking a step back. "I mean you."
Everyone was silent. And it was obvious why. They all had looked at me like I was the leader again when I decided to protect them. But that didn't mean I wanted to reprise the role. I was so sick of my life.
I'm a coward... And a liar... And Hashirama... You probably hate me, don't you?
"We're all imperfect. We all have flaws. None of us are Gods..." I said, turning around. "So, it's time we just accepted that and just...move on."
It was silent for a beat. With everyone most likely trying to process my cryptic wording.
But they won't get it. They can't. Because living life and being free is 'our' motto. Not theirs.
"Madara!" Danzo yelled. "If you leave, I'm telling everyone what we saw!"
I paused.
"You'll be a freak!" he reminded me. "And you'll never get an A, or a job...or even a house for as long as you live!"
He pointed at me.
"You're really going to throw your life away for that faggot?"
My skin bristled.
I really hate that word... But coming from his mouth makes me realize I hate him more... So much, much murderously more...
"That life that you're talking about..." I said. "Was never mine. I was always living a lie. Up until, I met him."
They all stared at me. I shook my head.
"But people who can't even understand why we created this union, why we decided to fight this fight, why we decided to pick up these guns... You guys clearly wouldn't ever understand something like love." I told them.
"Love?" Hiruzen asked me.
Love... I...
I turned around, sliding my hands into my pockets as I did and continued walking.
I...love him.
But I didn't need to say that. The pacing of my walking said it. The position of my hands set in my pockets. The slight bow of my head. My eyes grazing the concrete underneath my feet. My ears ignoring the rest of Danzo's shouting and threats and Kagami's confused exclamations and Hiruzen's pleads. Body language. It's the mirror into the mind. And my mind was screaming...
I'm done playing God... For Good.
Up Next: I wish I could tell you it doesn't get any heavier... It does. Much, much heavier. Starting off with Hashirama finding himself with his back against the wall. Literally. His Step-Mother Hisa becoming the most unsupportive parent since Madara's Mother (and that's saying something) and Madara having his own little encounter with Hisa as well, after becoming a nothing but a severely depressed jack-off and literally jacking-off. Hahaha. You don't wanna miss it.