First Date

The idea seemed sensible at the moment but as Haruka sat alone on his couch, his knees drawn up to his chest, he dreaded the idea. Right now, Rin and Makoto were supposedly going out on a date. Makoto had suggested they take turns in taking each other out on a date. As mentioned before, Haruka had agreed with the idea without really thinking about the possible consequences or dealing with the possible feelings of biting and stinging jealousy. Haruka had agreed because he didn't want to see Rin get hurt and just like usual, he had placed Rin's happiness before his own. Haruka had felt that he had monopolized Makoto quite a lot the past few days and weeks so his agreement came within a beat of his heart. However, the more he pondered about it, the more he regretted his choice. Wasn't he entitled to have Makoto to himself? They were dating before they mixed Rin into their relationship and if Haruka was truly honest, he didn't want to share Makoto anymore. They'd been through a really rough and heart-wrenching experience but that showed Haruka that he only wanted Makoto and no one else. Haruka rubbed at his temples as different scenario's played around in his mind. What if Makoto and Rin found each other again during this date? What if Makoto realised that Haruka was nothing more than a burden? What if Makoto was drawn to Rin's utterly sexy and arousing demeanour?

Rin and Haruka were nothing alike and Haruka knew well enough that Rin was the perfect catalyst to a burning fire. After all, it had been Haruka who had given into the burning sensation that Rin seemed to spark within him. There was something unmistakable and undeniable when it came to the redhead and while Haruka knew that he was perfectly immune to that now, Haruka wasn't sure Makoto was as well. Makoto was still playing around with his feelings, not quite ready to give in completely and it really scared Haruka. He didn't want to be afraid and he wanted to trust Makoto like he once could.

A loud and angry boom of thunder clashed in the sky and Haruka let his head rest on top of his knees, silently wishing he had Makoto right beside him…

Makoto met up with Rin outside a fancy restaurant. When their hands brushed to greet each other, Makoto felt a slight tingle in his arm and he smiled at Rin. The redhead looked good but Makoto knew that Rin always looked good, no matter what he was wearing. It was one of those things that could easily be described as a general truth. When they sat down at a secluded table for two, Makoto tried to approach this date with Rin as best as he could. Makoto felt slightly awkward for many different reasons. First and most important reason, he knew Haruka was probably feeling as if all the air had been knocked out of him. Second reason, he didn't want to hurt Rin and at the same time, he didn't want to hurt Haruka. He knew that the ultimate decision rested in his hands and while Makoto hated that heavy sense of responsibility, he knew he had to carry it.

When the waiter brought them a bottle of wine, Rin poured some of the red liquid in Makoto's glass as well as filling up his own. Makoto wasn't very fond of alcohol but right now, he felt like he could really use the drink. He sipped from the wine, loving the slight burn that it left in his throat as the drink slipped into his mouth. Makoto was at a loss of what to say but Rin's casual act soon had them talking about the smallest and most insignificant things. They commented on the heavy downpour of rain and the booming of thunder, they discussed the food on their plates and soon enough, that thick layer of ice was broken and Makoto relaxed. He would be lying if he said he wasn't enjoying his time with Rin. It was nice to just sit down and talk about things that didn't really matter all that much. It reminded Makoto of the relationship they once had, the uncomplicated bond they once shared. Nothing had been as laid-back as the relationship they once shared. Sure they fought from time to time but then the way they mended things again was enough to make Makoto drown in pleasure. Makoto smiled as he remembered the time he had with Rin, it was a large chunk of his youth and while he sometimes regretted it, he couldn't quite hide the fact that he also cherished that part of his past.

Rin was still the same and Makoto loved that about the redhead. Suddenly, Makoto found himself really examining Rin as if it were the first time he saw the boy. Rin's expressions were always open, honest and from time to time very complex. He was beautiful and handsome yet very cocky al at the same time. Those sparkling crimson eyes never failed to meet Makoto's emerald ones and Makoto smiled every time their gazes locked.

Makoto waited for the moment when Rin would ask about their complicated relationship or how things were going with Haruka, but the redhead never addressed that issue. Every time Makoto himself wanted to bring it up, something changed in his mind and he swallowed the words that rested on the tip of his tongue. Rin looked so relaxed and carefree at the moment and Makoto didn't want that to change. He knew Rin's mood would plummet if they were to discuss the possible future and so neither of them brought it up, they were far too content to enjoy each other's company. Instead of bringing up important issues, they took a walk down memory lane, discussing all kinds of things they went through when they were younger. Nagisa's antics and impossible dares came up on more than one occasion, leaving both young men to gasp and laugh, slightly disturbing the quiet atmosphere of the peaceful restaurant.

"Wow, maybe I'm just laughing too much, but it feels so hot in here. Is it just me?" Rin shrugged out of his suit jacket as he spoke, draping the jacket over the back of his chair. Makoto agreed and proceeded to shrug out of his jacket as well. Rin didn't stop there however, he unbuttoned his sleeves and rolled them halfway up his arms. Finally, he unbuttoned the second button on his shirt, fanning slightly at the exposed skin of his neck.

Makoto didn't even realise he was staring at the warm, slightly flushed neckline until Rin leaned forward to grasp his glass to sip his wine again. Makoto's mind went a little blank at that. For there, under the white, thin fabric of his shirt, he was sure he saw a hint of pink. It was only noticeable when Rin's chest was pressed against the fabric of his shirt, but Makoto could see the very faint pink outline of a pretty little nipple.

As soon as Makoto realised he had been staring quite obviously, his cheeks heated up and he wanted to smack himself. He realised he didn't quite have his feelings and emotions in check as he thought he had. He wasn't overly turned on but he couldn't quite deny the fact that seeing Rin's toned chest like that didn't do anything to him at all. Makoto hated his body for betraying him like this because this is not what he wanted at all. He wanted to have a nice and lovely evening and now, the only think Makoto could really think of was Rin… and his body.

The rest of the date passed by without further incidents and Makoto had fought hard to push the thoughts of Rin's body away and he succeeded. When they left the restaurant, the downpour was reduced to a soft trickle of rain that was barely noticeable. When they said their goodbyes, it was awkward as Makoto thought it would be. Rin just bumped his fist against Makoto's and when he was ready to walk away, he felt a hand hold him back. The redhead turned around and was surprised to find himself wrapped in Makoto's strong arms. Rin loved and hated this moment at the same time because it finally gave rise to some strange and mixed feelings. It's not like Rin didn't want Makoto anymore, but the redhead had already resigned himself to the fact that Makoto and Haruka belonged together. As fun as it had been before, he knew there was no place for him in their relationship. It could never work and Rin had to admit that Makoto always looked so happy when he was around Haruka.

"It's okay Makoto, you belong with Haru," Rin whispered against Makoto's neck and Makoto pulled back a little to gaze at Rin with furrowed brows. Makoto might not realise it but Rin did and he would make it his mission to make Makoto see who he really belonged with.

"Rin, I…"

"Just kiss me one last time, please?" Rin pleaded and Makoto leaned closer to press his lips against Rin's. The kiss was smooth and sweet, making them both jolt with feelings of their past together. It felt so utterly familiar and safe and Rin enjoyed this moment while it lasted because he knew they were not meant to be. Surprisingly, it was Makoto who deepened the kiss, his hands straying up to Rin's cherry-red hair, his fingers softly carding through those soft locks of red.

When they pulled apart, Rin finally felt at ease, ready to close off another chapter of his life. He would always support Makoto and Haruka even if it was bound to sting a little for the rest of his life. Rin quickly pecked Makoto on the lips one last time before wriggling out Makoto's hold to leave. Rin didn't look back as he walked down the pavement, a few tears mingling with the tears of the sky.

When Makoto walked home, his body ached with a need to hold something, someone. He suddenly yearned to have Haruka close to him, to feel that familiar warmth against him. When he almost reached Haruka's home, thunder started booming along with bright flashing lightning. Makoto quickened his pace and he didn't even wait for Haruka to open the door. He used the backdoor to enter and he walked straight to the bathroom because he knew that Haruka would be there. Lately, Haruka had developed a slight fear of thunder and while Makoto wasn't exactly thrilled either, he would do anything to protect Haruka. He entered the bathroom and within half a minute, he had lifted the huddle form in the tub and brought it over to the basement where the sounds of the thunder would be drowned out. Makoto held Haruka in his lap, his hands softly petting Haruka everywhere he could. Makoto didn't say a word about his date with Rin because he would show Haruka how much he meant when they went on their date…

You're my sun and my rain…

You're all I am…

A/N: Sorry it took me awhile to update yet again. I just want to say that I'm still struggling with my health… a lot. I don't know when the next update will be and all I can do at this moment is hope that you still enjoyed this chapter…

Lots of love!