Disclaimer: I still own nothing but my plot!

Ch. 24

When I woke up, my head hurt like hell.

I was cold, almost shivering.

My eyes were still blurry, and the room around me looked fuzzy and unfocused. It took a moment, and a few tries of blinking my eyes before I could see clearly again. I stared up at the grey, stone ceiling for a moment. This cold, empty place was my room, wasn't it? I slowly sat up, and looked at my surroundings.

Indeed it was.

Then I looked down to see that I was naked, my midriff and below covered only by a thin, emerald green, silk bed sheet that was a part of the Slytherin dormitories bedding set. The sheets were ruffled, and as I looked over to the other side of my bed, I saw that the pillow laid there had a small indentation imprinted into it. Someone had been here with me. Still fuzzed out, I took a moment to try and remember why I was naked, and why my room was a complete and utter mess.

And then I remembered.

I groaned, too quietly for anyone else to hear because my throat was way too sore.

I had slept with Pansy, willingly. I had initiated it, to be exact.

I could've sent her back to her room. I could've asked for the pass code back to the Slytherin dungeons. But no, what did I do? Led the girl on again, after I had told her all of those horrible things, basically saying I despised her. All the memories came flooding back.

I had slept with Pansy out of guilt for the words I had said to her. I had done it for her.

I cursed myself for trying to make the situation look smaller than it was, and for trying to make it seem like it wasn't my fault, when in reality, it was entirely my fault. I looked around my room a bit more.

Books had fallen from neatly packed shelves onto the floor, and the contents on my desk, including an inkpot, had also found their place on the floor. The window was open, and I discovered that the cold feeling I had been feeling was from the chilly breeze that the window had let in. I groaned again, placing my face in my hands. Things were going to get better. They had to. I had to stop being so goddamn foolish.

I supposed Pansy was at breakfast by now. I wondered if I should go talk to her, but I was too sore to move.

Then I remembered Hermione, my head replaying the scene where she sat on the steps, sobbing her poor little heart out. I had made her life worse as well, I supposed, kissing her like that without her will, and in her drunken state.

Things were going to get better.

I stared at the ink that lay spilled on the floor, seeping into the wooden planks, staining them.

Things had to get better.

I shook my head, alone in my cold, lonely room, the only sign of other human activity being the small indent on my pillow where Pansy's head had been, which was now starting to rise again, taking back its original form.

How could I possibly find anything positive in the situation?

My place was trashed, and I had ten times more the amount of guilt than I had had last night.

I couldn't.

VVVVV

I had skipped breakfast, and I was now coming close to skipping lunch. I didn't want to be seen.

I couldn't.

When I had woken up, I was extremely distraught. The memories of last night had come flooding back, and I had had to fight the urge to throw up. How could I have been so stupid?

How could I have possibly thought that Ron would want me if I made a complete and utter fool of myself? Not only had I embarrassed myself in front of all of the seventh years, and quite a few sixth years, kissed Dean and then ditched him, I had also ruined my friendship with Ron. Just the thought of it made me tear up. Without warning, the memories of what he had said to me hit me with such force that I had to sit back down on my bed.

'I would've never expected that from you Hermione' –

'You're really nothing but a jealous prat Ron! I don't know what I ever saw in you' –

'Yeah? Well I don't really know what I ever saw in an arrogant, boring girl like you either! '–

And then I had slapped him, something I could have never expected myself to do. I had hurt him more than I had ever meant to. No matter what he had ever done to me, he didn't deserve that.

Or did he?

Maybe I was just too upset to realize that he did deserve it. I pressed my face into my pillow, letting it soak up my tears. Who was I? Who was he?

What were we?

I didn't know anymore.

And I didn't think I would be able to fix it either.

Then there was Draco to think about too.

VVVVV

After I had managed to shower and get dressed, I had made it down to the Great Hall, just in time for lunch. I had skipped breakfast, and by the time lunch had arrived, my stomach was growling like mad.

I supposed I looked like crap as well, not to mention that my head was pounding from my giant hangover. I had had a whole bottle of firewhiskey by myself, after all. I had tried to sober up by using a charm, but I didn't have enough strength to do it my own. As I walked into the Great Hall, dodging loud and chatty people as best as I could, I spotted Blaise, nonchalantly cutting into his chicken, making small talk with a few other Slytherins. I quietly slid into the seat beside him, and helped myself to some pasta. While I ate furiously, Blaise didn't acknowledge me till he was done talking to the others. When he did, I was on my second plate of food. He looked me over for a moment, a smirk rising in his features.

Cocky bastard.

"What in Merlin's pants happened to you?" He said, still looking at me, almost distastefully.

I shook my head, rubbing the bags underneath my eyes. "Do I really look that bad?"

Blaise's smirk widened. "Well for your standards, bad is an understatement."

"Shut up", I scowled, tastefully tearing into a piece of garlic bread. The nerve of him was pissing me off.

He tut tutted. "Turn around will you?"

I shrugged and did what he said, and before I could react, Blaise had his wand pointed in my face.

"Revelius Intaglio", he said, and with a flick of his wand, my pounding headache had relieved itself, and I felt the puffiness of my face vanish. I felt loads better.

"There", Blaise mused, obviously impressed with himself. "Now you look loads better. Sorry I couldn't do anything about the ridiculous paleness though."

I punched his shoulder, getting my own opportunity to smirk as he hissed in pain. I smiled at him. "Thanks mate, I really do feel loads better."

He shook his head at me and paused for a moment. "So what did happen to you last night?"

It's not like I hadn't expected him to ask.

I shrugged, taking a sip of pumpkin juice. "It's a pretty long story. Can't we just talk about it later?"

Blaise looked at me for a moment, before gesturing over to the other table. I followed his gaze.

"If it involves that, then we can talk about it now." He replied, looking curious.

Looking over at the table, I saw Pansy, looking tired and downbeat, quietly and uninterestedly talking with her friends. I sighed.

"Blaise…–"

"What happened? It's obviously nothing good." He replied, now turning his full attention to me.

Was he concerned? I was sure he was. While Blaise could often be self-centered and a bit nonchalant, he was my best friend. He had always been there for me when others hadn't.

I paused for a moment, running a hand through my hair. He waited till I spoke. I paused for a moment.

"I…I slept with her, Blaise. I slept with Pansy." I said quietly. I had suddenly lost my fervent appetite.

Blaise looked at me skeptically. It didn't make sense to him, of course. In all of the years I had used Pansy as a benefit, taken advantage of her, I had never ever complained about it. It was seen as an almost positive thing.

"Well was it not as good as usual or something?" Blaise said confusedly, with a slight laugh in his voice.

"No. Actually, I'm sure it was great, but I can barely remember it. The problem is that before we did it, I told her I didn't love her. We fought. I actually insulted her quite a bit." I said blankly. I didn't know what else to say. It was enough to admit that I had degraded a girl that had been infatuated with me for years, and then uselessly fucked her.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Blaise bit his lip and looked over at Pansy again. "Well that would explain why she looks so troubled", he shrugged. He didn't ask for details, thank god. "Was she there when you woke up in the morning?"

I shook my head. "Of course not. She had probably realized that we had messed up by then. I'm pretty sure she left right after I had fallen asleep. Not like I would remember anyways." I replied bitterly.

Blaise cleared his throat. "Well you seem really guilty about it Draco. Are you going to apologize?"

"I want to. I just don't know when, or how." I shrugged. Blaise patted my shoulder.

"Well I'm here to help. And if you want, I'll see if Daphne can talk to her."

And then I remembered that Blaise had taken Daphne Greengrass to the ball last night.

"Sure. How was the ball last night for you anyways?" I said, looking over at Daphne before raising my eyebrows suggestively at Blaise. He shook his head at me, as if I were a child.

"It was great. She's really fun to be around. I don't know why I never tried talking to her before." Blaise replied with a small smile.

I knew why he hadn't bothered before, and the reason was Tracey Davis. Not wanting to ruin his mood, I didn't bring it up. Maybe he was finally getting over her, and if Daphne could do that to him, then she really was brilliant.

"That's not what I meant, but nice to know." I said, smirking. Blaise suddenly became very shy, something that rarely ever happened.

"Well I kissed her, if you must know. It didn't go farther than that." He admitted, not sounding regretful at all.

I looked at him, surprised. After the whole Tracey issue, Blaise almost made it a priority to sleep with a girl after or on the first date. He always had stories to tell, and countless girls were involved in them. I smiled, happy for him. He obviously respected Daphne more than I had thought.

"Well are you seeing her again then?" I asked interestedly.

Blaise shrugged, trying to look nonchalant about the whole thing, but he couldn't stop the smile that emerged on his face when I asked.

"Well asking her to talk to Pansy will give me another opportunity."

I nodded, happy for once that morning.

Brilliant girl.

Brilliant, brilliant girl.

VVVVV

I was heading to library, on a stomach full of nothing.

I had skipped lunch, and now, I was regretting it like no tomorrow. Was I being overly cautious? I didn't know. All I knew was that I was scared and embarrassed. Thank god it was a Saturday, for if I had had classes, I would've skipped them. Seeing Harry, Ginny and Ron was what I was most fearful of.

What if I saw Ron with Sylvia? What if I saw the three of them together?

No doubt he had told the other two the story by now. Harry would be extremely disappointed in me, and Ginny would be extremely shocked that in just a few hours I had managed to screw up everything that was good.

I wondered if she or any of the other girls had tried to look for me. I wondered if Ginny had told them. Out of worry she probably had, but probably not the details. She had always been good with those types of situations.

It was a stupid thought, but I really hoped they wouldn't look for me at the library, although everyone knew that was my go-to spot. I was basically setting myself up.

I didn't care.

I need somewhere quiet to be alone, and the comfort of books was too much to resist. If anything, I would just go into the restricted section if I had to. That most likely wouldn't be the case though, as I knew the library better than most people, and could easily find secluded places.

As I entered the library, I was relieved to see that only a few third years were in sight, too busy gossiping about the latest Wizarding rock band, or something or other. Madam Pince sat at her desk, diligently filing book reports, and paid no attention to my entrance.

Good.

I didn't want anyone knowing I was in here if they didn't have to. As I walked to the back of the huge library, I was cautious not to bring attention to myself, walking briskly to a small corner behind a cluster of large, domineering bookshelves. It was a small space in the corner by a window, with a table for the person to study on. It was also within less than walking distance to the bookshelves.

My perfect spot.

When I arrived to it and began setting up my things, I was surprised to see a black messenger bag resting against the leg on the table. I frowned. I had never encountered another person sharing my spot with me before. As far as I had thought, no one knew about the little space besides me.

Apparently not.

I stared at the bag. It was a dark, rich black, with silver fastenings, making the bag look intricate and extremely expensive. I couldn't place where, but I had seen the bag before. It seemed so familiar. After a few moments, I decided that it didn't matter.

I supposed I could move.

I gathered my things, and turned around to seek a new spot. Instead, I turned and slammed into something hard, making me jump in startled surprise. I nearly yelped, for the collision had been so unexpected. As my eyes focused, I gasped in surprise.

I had run into someone, rather.

Draco looked down at me, an unfathomable expression gracing his expression. Since I had seen him last night, something about him seemed different. For one, he looked tired, his hair messy and run through, his eyes looking sleepy and unrepressed. I stared at him for a moment, before I recollected the events of last night. I looked down during the few moments of silence, trying to avoid his gaze, and saw that he clutched a bright green apple in his pale hand. Before I could control it, my stomach growled murderously.

Draco laughed, and before I could say anything to him, he held the apple out towards me.

"Hungry, Granger?" He asked knowingly, musing.

I didn't answer, but watched as his eyes lingered from my face to the table behind me.

I remembered that bag very clearly now.

VVVVV

Hey guys! So it's been a little wait hasn't it? Draco and Hermione are having another encounter, and we'll just have to see where it goes! Thanks so much for reading and keeping up with this story! Feel free to leave reviews, constructive criticism and ideas! Love to all!