Chapter Forty-Four

(Fin's POV)

When I open my eyes again it's finally without a great and terrible effort.

I maintain the shallow breathes for a few minutes before I try to move. Make sure that the room isn't going to do anything crazy like spin or blur or twirl about.

I've had about as much of that as I can stand.

I sit up slowly, look around and try to stifle the disappointment of being alone.

I have no idea what time it is; or where anyone else is…since I'm alone though I might as well try to assess my own damage…

I turn carefully, slide to the edge of the bed with some minor pain…so far so good; the room is still in focus.

I chalk that up to the win category.

I keep my bare feet flat on the floor; toes scrunching experimentally in the worn carpet. I glance down; notice my toe nails are still painted a ridiculous bright red. Frown as my own fingers catch my attention…someone painted them red as well to match…

What the..?

The bruises and shallow slices that were crisscrossed over my bare forearms are almost gone, only a few of the really deep-dark marks above my elbows still hold much color…and even those are faded to a more subtle green-blue.

How long was I asleep?

I try to move my right arm; find that my elbow is tied to my waist with a strip of cloth ripped from something…the small movement I do manage pulls along my clavicle just enough to be uncomfortable; but not agonizing.

After Lizzie tried to stab me in the throat and missed I probably had a nice hole to deal with; since I'm alive and awake she must have missed my lung and Carol must be a fast learner with open wounds.

Mika…I need to check on Mika…her name skitters through my brain, pulling me up to my feet.

I have to pause, something tugging at the inside of my other elbow…the IV…right.

It's surprisingly difficult to disconnect one from your own arm with one hand…I fumble with the cap for a moment before successfully freeing myself, rolling down the stopper on the line to keep the clear liquid from running out onto the bed.

Now I can go check on Mika.

But where is she?

I blink at my surroundings again; I seem to be in one of the children's bedrooms…the one with only one bed, a boys room; which was furthest down the short hallway if I recall.

…my sleeping bag is on the floor unrolled at the end of the bed…someone has been sleeping in here while I was out of it…based on the rumpled grey shirt dropped on the floor next to it I think I know who.

So maybe Mika is in the other room still with Molly?

I move towards the door to the room; pleased when the dizzy spell doesn't start. I have to use my left hand to pull open the door my right one still secured by a strip of fabric around my upper arm and chest.

The hallway is empty too; I can hear voices in the front room…Carol's it sounds like…and must be Sasha's… I'm not sure where the others are.

I pad quietly across the carpet, the door to the other room is cracked, I push it open further with my hand, slip inside when I see her on the bed.

I push it carefully shut behind me, not completely…I don't want to make too much noise.

She looks healthy at least, she's got better color then I do most likely.

There's an IV bag hanging off a coat hanger, attached to a hook in the wall that looks like it was originally intended to hang a child's decorative painting…probably the one now leaned against the far wall.

Hydration is a little more important than Winnie the Pooh.

I move closer to her, check her pulse; pull the blankets back to check her bandages.

"You're alive," I start in surprise, worried for a second that someone has come in behind me and I didn't hear them; until my eyes darting up to find her staring at me.

"Yeah, you too."

She stares at me still half asleep. "Thank you, for not telling them it was really me." Her voice is so quiet I have to lean down again to hear it…such a vastly different child then her sister.

"It's okay, you're secret is safe with me."

She smiles softly, eyes slipping shut again. "So is yours…"

I stare down at her soft even breathing; obviously she's drifted back to sleep now, might not have really been awake to begin with…Tobin used to talk in his sleep…

God. I take a slow deep breath.

My secret is in the hands of a traumatized 10 year old girl.

I turn my head at the sound of the door opening behind me, half expecting it to be Daryl chewing me out for being up.

But it's Worse.

"Oh no you don't," Carol is in the doorway behind me.

"I just need to check her…"

"No you don't." She gently grabs my good arm, helps pull me upright to my feet; voice gentle. "You're as thick headed as he is."

I blink, tilt my chin trying to understand the expression on her face, I'm not sure what to say to that.

She nods her head towards the door. "Come on. Sasha and I can take care of this; you need to rest."

That's all I've been doing…I don't even know how long it's been…

She's leading me back down the hall; trying to put me back in bed…

Oh Dear lord…I'm getting mothered.

What the hell happened while I was passed out?

She's just gotten me to lie back down when Sasha comes in with a coffee mug smiling when she sees me awake.

If only it was coffee in there I'd be smiling too.

"Yeah I miss coffee too."

I blink at Carol in confusion. She smiles taking the mug from Sasha's hands.

"No you didn't say it out loud; but I know that look, and I can completely sympathize with missing coffee."

"This was labeled for pain." She dips her head to the tea indicating the drink in my mug.

"Daryl double checked it…" she smiles softly looking down, "And then triple checked it just to make sure."

"I don't understand."

Sasha has already scooted out the door Carol watches her leave, turns her attention back to me for several moments; perhaps not sure what to say either…

I'm not sure she's going to speak again when Carol turns her face away from me again, takes a slow breath. "He's obviously very sweet on you; he's barely left your side since you went out cold in the kitchen…Don't think I've ever seen him that upset actually." She frowns down at her hands in her lap.

I swallow some of the tepid liquid, needing something to do with my own hands.

"You're good for him, so you'd better start taking better care of yourself."

This from the women who days ago threatened to slit my throat…these people have a funny way of interacting with each other.

She stands up, moves to leave the room pauses at the door again.

"I'm sorry about Lizzie…I know she did terrible things…I know she wasn't my daughter…but I've done things in my life I'm ashamed of; and I guess a small part of me thought if I could save her I could maybe redeem myself. I'm sorry you got hurt over my foolishness."

"It's okay, you don't have to apologize to me. I'm sorry for a lot of things too."

It's an ugly world; full of ugly people doing terrible things…I can't fault someone for wanting something better; hoping and praying for a silver lining.

We could all use a bit more of that.

:: Walking Dead ::

Notes:

Alright that's three chapters I give unto you! :D

Fin's alive, But so many questions still! What's Mika's secret? anyone want to guess?

And who painted Fin's fingernails?! muhahaha!