Disclaimer: I own nothing! But my offer still stands for Draco in my bed.

Ch. 43

Waking up, I saw red.

Literally.

I reached up, blurry eyed, to grab at the tuft of soft red fabric that hung over my face. Pulling it down as if it were a blanket, light flooded my features, making me cringe slightly.

It only took three seconds to remember myself.

I jerked up, groaning as my head sloshed around within my skull. My heartbeat thudded against my chest as my eyes fluttered closed against the palm of my hand.

Oh, God.

What had I done.

Forcing my eyes to open and accept the fact of what had happened last night, I worried my lip as I glanced worriedly around the room. How could I not remember. The evidence that Draco had been in my room last night was obvious, from the slight dent in the sheets beside me to the scent of his cologne that clung in the air like a pleasant mist.

My stomach twirled around in circles as I recalled last night.

I had never seen Draco so...livid. Not only that, but weak as well.

I had never seen that mix of emotion cloud his features since that night in the bathroom. And he had looked utterly beautiful.

What had I said to him? Why couldn't I remember? All of it had been a blur. All I remembered was arguing and then –

His lips were attacking mine.

Fire rushed through my bloodstream at the thought, and I had to brace myself against the headboard of my bed.

Merlin...

My eyes shot down to where the skirt of my dress lay frazzled against my thighs, riding up nearly all the way to my crotch. Hurriedly, I grabbed it and pulled it down as if someone would see. The strangest thought entered my head, and I shot it down before I could really process it.

No. No, things hadn't gotten the chance to go that far. But it almost had...

Hadn't it?

I needed time to sort out my head. To rethink my actions. Process them, rather. And the fact that Draco was only down the hall was dwindling my time to do so down to measly seconds. Minutes, if I was lucky.

A shower. A change of clothes. Then a confrontation.

I nodded to myself, regaining my composure. Yes, that was the logical thing to do right?

The most logical at the moment, anyways. Grabbing a towel from the dresser, I gathered my hare-brained thoughts and threw them out of my head and into the water as I stepped into the scalding shower.

VVVVV

"You're wrong! As much as you try to say that this is your fault, your undoing? We share everything, we have ever since that night in the bathroom on the seventh floor –"

"That's a lie, you have no idea how I'm feeling!"

"Like your world is falling apart. Like all of the structure that you've built around yourself is crumbling –"

"Shut up, you filthy–!"

Mudblood?

I paused outside of Draco's door, hair dripping onto the parquet floor.

"Merlin, Hermione," I scolded myself as I took my wand out to dry my hair. I had forgotten to from nerves. There wasn't any noise coming from inside of Draco's room. I had expected the sound of a shower, or even rustling about...but it was silence. Completely mute, almost as if he'd never been there at all.

Sucking in a breath and gritting my teeth, I rapped my knuckles against the door.

Not one moment later, Draco's clear voice resounded from within. "Come in."

The door creaked as I stepped in, my bare feet pressing into the plush carpet. I turned, and my heart strangled my throat.

Draco was sitting calmly at the side his bed, hands linked, eyes down. He didn't even regard me as I announced myself.

"Oh, good," I smiled quietly. "You're dressed."

I faltered as his eyes came up to observe me. I was, without use of a better word, flabbergasted. And unbearably nervous. Draco smirked.

"You're not."

I looked down to see the differences of our clothing. A jumper and pajama pants to a black suit and turtleneck.

"At least not fully, anyway." He added, not even bothering too look at me. He was avoiding me. Avoiding it. A low thrum of anger and something uncommonly close to embarrassment bubbled in my abdomen.

"Stop it, Draco." I said quietly, daring him to look me in the face. "You know why I'm here." I said, and it was as if I was talking to a wall.

Draco's eyes shot up to glare softly at mine. He scanned my face, the smallest trace of a sneer etched on his face.

"Well, bugger me." He said patronizingly, standing up from the side of the bed and making his way toward me. "Tell me, Granger, why are you here?"

I stared up at him, wondering what the hell I was doing. I said nothing. Draco's eyes flickered from my eyes to my mouth for a moment, and spark ignited in my head. After what seemed to be minutes of just staring at each other, I spoke.

"Do you regret it?" I asked boldly, all the while questioning myself. Draco, obviously shocked at my honesty, looked as if he were about to faint. He turned, making his way toward the bed again. My eyes caught something brushing against the hem of the bedsheets. He scoffed.

"I could ask you the same question, couldn't I? You didn't exactly push me away." Draco muttered, and although I knew the answer in my head, I paused. Draco revealed his wand and levitated his suitcase so that it floated behind him. Realization struck me, hard.

"What...what are you doing?"

Draco shook his head. "Don't be daft, Hermione."

He was leaving. Because of last night, he was going to disappear and shut himself away from me. My fingers curled at the thought of losing him. And I had just gotten him to open up to me! After weeks! Months! Hell, years if I really thought of it! Now, it was all being thrown away?

No, Merlin, no. Not like this.

"You don't have to! To leave! Last night didn't change anything!" I lied. Sure, I had kissed him before. But not like that. Never like that. I had moaned his name, for Godric's sake! Draco fixed me with a stony look before softening his gaze.

"Yes, it did. It changed everything, Hermione. Whether you want to beleive it or not."

I stood in shock, my knees nearly buckling beneath me at his statement. Draco Malfoy had just gotten as close to confessing something as I thought he never would, if that made sense.

The subject of his statement lingered in the air like smoke, trapping me and making me dizzy. I knew things had changed. It was written all over his face. Whether it was for the better or the worse, I didn't know.

"I...I - "

Please.

"And besides," Draco shrugged, frowning slightly. "I've overstayed my welcome. It wouldn't be good for me to stay under the same roof as your parents...your Father especially." He smiled weakly, grasping the edge of the headboard with his long fingers. His ring glinted.

When I didn't say anything, he walked to me with his luggage in tow, and did something unexpected. I felt his hand in mine.

"Walk me downstairs?" Draco murmured, regarding me with stormy grey eyes.

At that moment, I realized how much it hurt that he was leaving.

VVVVV

After finding a convenient place for Draco to apparate in my backyard, we stood face to face. I still held his hand. He looked as if he wanted to say something, so I waited.

"Tell your Mother I'm sorry for being such a tosser. And your Father as well." Draco muttered, looking off somewhere behind me. I suspected he was gazing into the icy pool. Cold air whipped around us, still but deadly, with just enough wind to ruffle Draco's hair. I wanted to reach up and smooth it against his head, but I restrained myself. I didn't want to risk making him more uncomfortable than he looked. Or letting something else happen. No matter how hard Draco tried to conceal his emotion from me, I could always see it, resting just beneath the unknowingly transparent guard he constantly put up.

I nodded.

"You don't have to go, you know," I murmured, looking up at him earnestly. His face was halfway between stoicness and confusion, but I continued. "You really don't. You aren't meant to leave for a few more days."

Draco looked down, only for a moment, to where our hands linked, fingertips tickling against our clothes. Something very close to a sigh emitted from his lips, almost as if he was dissapointed. It stung more than anything he could've chosen to say. Then, he let go.

I don't want you to go.

Draco stepped back, to look at me, I suppose, his fingers tightening on the handle of his trunk. Warmth flickered through his eyes, and with a small smirk, he chuckled. "Don't worry, Granger. I think a few days away from here will do me some good. Perhaps I'll get used to having some solitude again. To think."

I smiled back lamely, not wanting him to see how badly his departure was hurting me. Christ, what had I thought, that he would stay until Christmas? It was my fault for getting attached. He had told me long ago that he would be leaving before that, but it still hurt like raging hell that he was leaving early. But could I blame him? Of course, I understood.

Draco's eyes met mine again, blue-grey crashing perfectly against honey chocolate. With a few more steps back, I could see the beginnings of disapparation starting to surround him.

"Have a Happy Christmas, Hermione." Draco said softly, an unfathomable expression swallowing his features. And with a gust of high, rushing wind, he was gone.

I stared at the spot where he had just been standing merely seconds ago, watching the grass sway from the remnants of wind.

I sighed, and turned, trudging back into the house. My eyes stung and blurred over.

There were so many things running through my head. So many things unsaid.

VVVVV

With a sharp crack and a gust of air, I found myself standing on the gray cobblestones of Malfoy Manor. I turned to see that I had landed past the large guarding gate, which I found strange. The wards had obviously been altered so that people of the Malfoy descent could enter without pretense. I looked around at the courtyard surrounding the Manor. Merlin, how this place had changed since...Nontheless, I dragged myself forward, forcing myself to move. I didn't want to be out here too long. It had never been particularly welcoming, but it certainly had never been this disheveled.

The courtyard was strewn with leaves and the shrubs were dying out, dark green leaves sputtering out onto the dark cobblestone walkway that stretched out. The garden-like maze was empty, void of the usual things I saw, like House-elves tending to the landscape, or the white peacocks that had once proudly strutted along the path. All in all, it was nothing but a mass of gray space. Where the hell had all that gone? It nearly looked like a ghost town. Swallowing the eerie feeling and placing it in my gut, I trudged towards the grand doors. There was no House-elf to open the door for me, or to sense my presence, so I did something that for the life of me I couldn't remember doing ever.

I knocked. Actually touched the door. I smirked, bemused now at the stupidity of it all...

There was a sharp crack from within, and before I could determine who was behind it, the large, dark, intricate double doors creaked open, revealing the warm yet slightly gloomy house within. At first, nothing met my eyes but -

"Oh!" Someone squeaked, and my eyes shot down to reveal the frail body of Missy, one of my mother's many House-elves.

Something squeaked, rather.

"Mr. Malfoy, such a pleasure to see you again, do come in!" She pipped, before curving her already hunched body into something of a bow. My throat twinged uncomfortably at the thought of Hermione seeing this, what with her stupid little House-elf campaign. What had it been called again? S.P.A.T.? Merlin, it shouldn't have mattered...

"Hello, Missy," I grumbled, as she immediatley releived me of my trunk and let me into the warm house. The ice that seemed to cover my skin melted instantly, and I nearly sighed. Taking in my surroundings, I was happy to see that nothing had really changed all that much. The large entrance was a little darker, but the extravagant arabian rugs still remained and the large sitting room slightly dusty albeit rather the same. It gave me chills to be in here, with all of the disturbing memories that the large house held, but it was still my home.

My Mother still remained.

"Where is my Mother?" I asked calmly, masking my slight panic with frigidness as I adressed the small Elf. Missy gestured to upstairs.

"The Lady of the House is in Her Grace's study! Shall Missy escort you up there, Sir?" Missy asked dutifully, and I merely shook my head before making my way to the grand marble staircase. The coldness of the rock vibrated through my feet, even though the house was comfortably warm.

"Another thing. Is anyone else...here?" I faltered, not making eye contact with the Elf. Although the Dark Lord and his followers hadn't visited since earlier this summmer, one could never be too sure...

Missy took a second to register, and had my father been home he would've punished her for her mere moment of thought. "No Sir, just The Lady." She bowed, and without another word and dragged myself up the stairs. I debated for a moment before pausing again.

"Thank you," I murmured quietly, and I didn't think Missy had heard it. If she had, I didn't turn to watch her wipe her large, glassy orbs on her pillowcase.

A girl with bushy hair and a comforting demeanor would've smiled. I shoved that thought out of my head as well.

VVVVV

I hadn't realized how empty the house would be after he'd gone. Or how lonely it would be.

Having my first breakfast alone since I'd gotten here, I grimly scanned over The Daily Prophet. It really was a bit late for breakfast, but I wasn't in the mood to be precise.

'Celestina Warbeck gives birth to a bubbly baby girl! See our coverage and never before seen pictures on page eight!'

'Ministry of Magic to strengthen wards around employee homes, due to the recent attacks made towards Ministry. workers.'

'Has Dumbledore lost it?'

I sighed, throwing the paper down onto the table. There was nothing reliable in The Prophet anymore. It had become just as worthless as a Wizarding gossip magazine! Not ever since it had been rumored to have been taken over by the dark side. But that was the least of our worries. The higher ranks of their side would not be worrying over something as trivial as a newspaper, and our side wouldn't either.

Harry had been meeting with Dumbledore regularly, under the promise that he would reveal nothing to Ron or me. He hadn't said it, but I knew. It was only a matter of time. And I would be prepared.

We would all have to be.

VVVVV

I had only been in my Mother's study a handful of times, and as I had matured, the number of times had lessened to even smaller than that.

I had been standing in the same spot for minutes, determining whether to just barge in or –

Draco, don't be a twat.

I pressed a flattened palm against the cold door and pushed slightly, so that it creaked open about two or three inches. A warm glow emitted from within, and it was the first bright color I had seen since I'd entered The Manor. I cleared my throat and revealed myself, warmth crawling through my body. The warm glow of the fireplace was the only source of light save for the few lamps that lit up the incredibly large space. Nothing in here had changed, as far as I could remember.

The blood red carpet still remained, plush and clean as if it had just been placed yesterday, and the bookshelves looked neat and tidy. Portraits and landscape paintings clung to the walls, and the large arched windows were out of view, covered by dark curtains. My Mother's grand desk gleamed, and I spotted rare artifacts on the shelf behind it.

My entrance had caused the slightest bit of attention, and I heard my Mother's warm yet commanding voice emit from somewhere in the large room.

"Missy? Just leave the tea on the table beside the chair, I shall retreive it when I'm finished." She said, her hand coming into view from behind a large, dark red armchair that she sat in. She waved Missy away, unaware that it was me.

"Mother." Was all I could manage to say, and I watched the back of the armchair almost stiffen. My Mother stood up almost simultaneously as I took a weak step forward. She turned to me, grey-blue eyes colliding with ones that were exactly like her own. Her expression crumpled, and her wand clattered to the floor, the sound muffled by the rug. She smiled, breathlessly.

"Draco?"

VVVVV

I had debated on taking a nap before I did something rash, when someone softly knocked on my door. I paused for a moment, breath hitching in my throat.

How silly of me, I thought, frowning. Draco had left hours ago...

"Hermione? Honey, are you in there?" My Mum's voice rang, ricocheting off of the walls that had been filled with mindblowing silence moments before.

"Yes?" I croaked softly, grabbing a book from the bedside table. Knowing she would barge in any moment, I tried to make it seem as if I had been dilligently reading instead of just sitting in suffocating silence.

"Can I come in?"

I didn't answer, knowing that she would just enter anyways as she always did. I didn't have the heart to tell her no. Like clockwork, I watched as her head peeked out from behind the door. Concern flooded her features.

"Sweetheart –"

"I'm fine." I muttered, turning to look out the window. Tears clouded my view as my Mother touched me.

"You don't always have to be fine, you know." She said, tentativley rubbing my back.

"Draco's gone," I said blankly, and my Mother nodded.

"I know. I'm sorry to see him go. Your father –"

"I don't want to talk to about Dad." I said hotly, reaching up to brush at my eyes. It didn't help in the slightest.

The anger and shame I felt at my Father blew my mind. I had never felt a hate, or any dislike for him! But the way he'd treated Draco was not only unacceptable but unexpected from him!

The look that had crossed Draco's face when my Father had outed him was one that I hadn't been able to handle.

"I know, darling. I apologize for last night. It was my idea to go out for dinner, and I should've known better since your Father was already stressed and edgy. I'm sorry for scaring Draco away."

Is that what we had done? After all I had done to make him see that Muggles were just as good? It was all ruined. My Father had spoiled everything! The friendship I had had to delicately build with Draco, the possibility that there could've been something more? All of it was ruined, and I didn't know what I could possibly do to fix it. I could apologize, as I had and would again, but the fact of the matter was if he would accept it.

"He apologized, you know." I mumbled. "Draco told me that he was sorry for being a tosser to you and dad." I sniffed. My Mother smiled, chuckling.

"Well that's sweet. It only shows that he's a gentleman, dear! But he didn't need to apologize. That was your Father's job." Mum tutted, continuously rubbing my back. After a few moments of silence, she muttered something about making me some tea and left the room.

I exhaled loudly once she left, burying my face into my pillow, completely at loss of what to do.

VVVVV

My Mother had nearly attacked me, which was surprising for a Pureblooded, aristocratic woman like herself. The women of the Malfoy family were known their nearly extreme, high strung, even snooty behavior to everyone, whether they were dealing with their own children or not.

"Draco! What are you doing home?" Narcissa exclaimed, searching my eyes as she ran her light, manicured fingers through my hair. She smoothed it, a surprisingly motherly gesture that I hadn't felt or gotten anywhere since the summer. "Is there something wrong?" She inquired, looking up at me. It was then I'd realized that I had gotten taller. And that she had gotten...older...wearier.

My Mother was an extremely beautiful woman, as were the rest of the Malfoy women, but due to the strains that had been put on her family, age had started to creep into her features and dismantle her usual youthful appeal. She wasn't shriveled or anything of the sort, but I couldn't help but notice the barely there crinkles at the side of her eyes and forehead, and the faint strands of gray that had began to mix in with the light strands of her practically white blonde hair. Not that that stopped my mother from upkeeping her outfits and general demeanor. It was just that something seemed...different...

Perhaps she was still having trouble recovering from being Imperuised. To be honest, I didn't think that she would ever properly heal.

"Nothing is wrong, Mother," I smiled, trying to put the panic in her eyes at ease. She smiled back then, and I felt the pressure in my chest alleviate itself. "I just decided to come and stay for a while. Hogwarts was far too lonely," I lied. She smiled then, and I felt a little more relieved.

With a snap of Mother's fingers, Missy was standing at the door, perturbed eyes peering into the room. "You called me, Miss?"

"Missy, make sure that lunch is served in a few minutes, Draco must be famished! Also see to Draco's room, should he need anything else." My Mother commanded, although her voice was much gentler than the other times I'd heard her order Missy around. It seemed strange, how empty the house was. It still was overpowered with grandeur, but something seemed to be missing...

"Yes, Madam! Do you or Master Draco require anything else?" She asked, and my Mother shook her head and waved her away.

"That will be all, thank you."

I could've fallen to the ground then, at the utter shock and near concern that I felt. My Mother had just thanked a House-elf. Sure, I had done it mere minutes ago, but it was different! I couldn't remember Mother ever thanking an Elf in my life...or anyone that wasn't important, really. My father would've...

I shuddered, not even able to think about it.

Yes, things had quite changed, and more so than I'd thought.

"Is something the matter, Draco? You look like you're about to be sick," Mother noted, her voice laced with concern. She brought a hand to my hair again, stroking it gently. It brought back a memory that was totally unattached to the scenario. Pansy had always stroked my hair when we cuddled in the Slytherin dungeons. Well, more like she'd fawned over me while I sat there uncomfortably. A small, insignificant amount of me nearly missed it.

Hermione came into my vision, her presence ridiculously real.

I turned my back to my Mother, blinking with near bewilderment.

"How have things been...while I was away at school?" I muttered, trying to contain the strange rustling feeling going through my body. What did they call it? Nostalgia?

Mother lowered her eyes, seemingly quiet. When she looked up at me again, her expression was sad and worried.

"There are certainly things that we need to talk about," She said, and before I could respond, I felt her hand leading me to the armchairs.

"Draco, things have changed."

VVVVV

Hello, everyone! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, please don't be upset with me! I know, it pains me too that Draco and Hermione have to be separated for a while, but they'll see each other at school, I promise! Plus, Draco got to see his Mother, which he's wanted for a really long time. Sorry for the spelling errors, I still dont have microsoft word. I hope you guys are liking the twists, there's so much more to be revealed! I have an announcement! On August 11th, 2010, I started this story! Can you beleive it, its the one year anniversary! I wanted to update on the 11th (to make things special), but once again, real life always gets in the way! I just wanted to say that this anniversary chapter is dedicated to all of you guys, and to the ones that have stuck with this story from the beginning and have kept me going with your incredibly sweet reviews. This story would probably be nonexistent by now if it weren't for all of you incredible readers! I love all of you guys, thanks so much. Feel free to leave a review in honor of the occasion ;D! Also, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them and I will get back to you! I also just wanted to update before school starts, which is in two days. Fuck my life haha. Love to all, thanks for being so great!

P.S., make up some questions or predictions for this fic and leave it in a review! Love to all! X