Disclaimer: Not mine, all original characters are the property of the TWD and AMC

Notes: Huge thanks to all the readers and reviewers; you guys make me feel amazing! Makes hours in front of the computer fly by because I can't wait to get the next bit out!

Chapter Sixty

(Fin's POV)

"You look like Hell."

I'd grin, but it pulls my lip too much. I'm a little sick of spitting the copper taste out of my mouth after the last half hour.

"Aww You know just how to make a girl feel special."

Luke snorts hands me one of the homemade chemical icepacks he's carrying. I take it from him press it to my split lip with a soft hiss.

"Damn that's cold."

"Yes, that's what I did 8 years of school for: ice packs. Keep it on there; or your face is going to swell up like a pumpkin. Don't want that Daryl guy kicking my ass…"

Somehow I don't think that's going to be a problem seeing as he's not said two words to me in as many days now. He won't even look at me.

"Don't think I've hit you in years…You sure you're okay?"

I nod waving him off with my free hand. "Yeah, just stings like a bitch."

"You're not kidding." Luke flops down next to me on the sofa with a grunt, crooks his elbow to press his own zip-lock bag to his face. I notice the dried blood on his forearm and scuffed elbow with some satisfaction.

At least we both look like Hell.

"I think you're elbows got longer." He comments casually after a few moments.

"No, you just got sloppier."

"They got bonier I know that much." I dig my bony elbow into his bruised ribs. He grunts in protest shifts against the couch pulling me into his side.

"I miss this." He sounds so sad, has to be thinking of his brothers…his father…my chest tightens.

"I know, me too." I pull the ice away from my lip switching hands since my fingers are going numb, press it briefly to what feels like a lump on the side of my head.

"Put that back on there…You could come with us; you should come with us. You belong with us, not norms."

I stare up at the ply board flooring overhead, snort softly.

Norms.

I don't know what normal is anymore; but I don't think anyone can really be classified with the term nowadays.

Luke is staring at me, waiting I realize. My stomach knots.

"And leave all this?" I wave a vague hand.

"What?"

I stare at him while his face clouds over. I know that look. Eric did it better once upon a time; but Luke's no slouch at it either. Learn from the best and all that.

"No, Seriously. What is this really? I mean, these people seem nice; but how long is that going to last? What happens when this goes south? And you know it will. What happens when strangers roll through here, or a mob moves through? How long until something happens and then it's what? You alone with a baby? Or they figure out what you are; sell you to the highest bidder; if they don't just put a bullet in your brain first. Hell you got stabbed by one of them already Finny! And shot! You're supposed to be smart!" He finishes with a hiss.

"I can protect them."

From Walkers at least.

"And who protects you huh? Cause from where I stand they're doing a piss pour job of it; and what's the big deal with saving the world? That's not your job. Come with us, you don't owe them anything." Luke's blue eyes narrow down at me.

"You wouldn't understand." And I don't know how to make him.

Hell, I don't understand it myself. It doesn't make sense; especially right now. It's all one giant excruciating mess.

"Oh really? I understand a lot of things Finny; so why don't you spell it out for me, and if it makes sense; rational, logical sense then alright. But it doesn't; does it?" Luke keeps staring at me.

I glare at him ice pack clenched in my fist almost forgotten despite the numbing cold, too busy grasping at straws with my brain for a reason that doesn't involve him; one that Luke can accept; one that I can live with if I can't fix this mess with Daryl…

"They have a baby. I don't need to tell you what that means if something happens to all of them."

"Is this really about the baby Finny, or is it about Mr. tall dark and brooding?"

"Shut up." I press the cold pack to my lip again even though it's already burning with cold and mostly numb. Turn my head away to stare at the wall.

"I was serious before Finny: Come to Winchester. People like us; we belong in Winchester; forget them. Hell, you're the only girl I know of; you might be what they need!" He finishes in a quiet hiss.

Just the thought makes my chest contract, my next exhale hurts. I shake my head while the wall blurs; I blink it back into focus furiously. I will not shed tears in front of Luke, or anyone else.

"You could stay." We don't speak for a few minutes.

I recognize a stalemate when I see one. My heart sinks.

"I could come back after this trip; but I have to finish this; and I don't know how long it will take."

I nod once. Part of me wants to go—even if it means I'll have to deal with Chris; not one of my favorite people left in the world. I'd have Luke back though; family. Real Family…Family that Knows…I wouldn't have to hide anymore…

But the knots twisting my insides disagree. Thinking about leaving Carl, and Mika and Daryl…

My eyes burn and the pain centered in my chest is a rabid inundation of overwhelming clarity when compared to the twinge the thought of Luke leaving without me brings.

Luke wants a rational, logical answer; but when has the human heart ever been either?

It's obvious where my heart is.

Even if it's alone.

I close my eyes tuck my chin and lean my temple against Luke's shoulder with a heavy sigh.

"That bad huh?"

I nod once. Luke makes a harrumphing sound in reply shaking his head.

"I could go kick his ass you know."

I snort, it hurts.

"What is it about this guy? I mean I never pegged you in a million years for the pissy bad-boy type."

I frown at that.

"He's not pissy." I stop lift my head from Luke's shoulder at his scoff, my lips pursed into a firm line. "Yeah okay, well he isn't always pissy…He can be…really sweet."

Luke frowns at me. I force myself to not look away.

"I think you deserve better."

I scowl at him. "It's none of your damn business, you don't even know him."

"I know Chris has been trying to get your attention for the last 6 years now; and you never even offered him the time of day! What the hell did this guy do that has you so wrapped up that he can treat you like shit and you don't even see it?"

The ice pack drops completely forgotten to my lap. I lean back crossing my arms over my chest. "We had a fight; it happens, we'll get over it."

I think.

I hope...

My chest aches.

"And I don't like Chris…like that."

"You might if you gave him half a chance."

I glare at Luke seething. "Fabulous!" I stand up pace away with quick agitated steps before turning back to glare down at him waving my hand. "This just never gets old, I'm not twelve years old God Damnit. You don't get to tell me what to do, or where to go, and you most certainly do not get to tell me who to date!"

"Oh so you're dating the guy? How's that work exactly? Does he even speak in full sentences? Has he ever said he wants to be with you, that he loves you? You don't know the first God Damn thing about this guy! I hope your being careful at least!"

I sputter in complete shock, cheeks flushing in mortification. "Fuck you! What I'm doing isn't any of your damn business!"

"Oh, that's brilliant Finny! What the fuck are you thinking? That settles it, you're leaving with us when we go, because it's obvious to me you've got no idea what's actually going on here!"

"Oh and you do? News Flash Luke: You have a PhD in Chemistry that doesn't make you Doctor Love, Dumbass!"

We're both standing now, and yelling.

"I know a Hell of a lot more then you do, I'm a guy."

I snort, "A Dick doesn't give you the right to dictate my life! You can shove your misogynistic…"

"When was the last time you dated Finny? Oh wait, that's right you don't. Chris asked you out how many times?"

"I told you: I Don't Like Chris!"

"Fine, you don't like Chris! But you also don't know the first damn thing about men; you're fucking clueless! Worse than that, you're gullible as shit! This isn't some romance novel! What exactly do you think is going on here? You spend a few weeks with a guy and suddenly your all but married to him? He's not even speaking to you! That's pathetic Finny! What are you gonna do just follow him around like some pathetic looser until he gets you killed?"

Ouch.

My breath huffs out. It's not a sob…not exactly. I try to swallow around the swelling pain working its way up from my chest, it makes a croaking noise when it sticks in my throat.

"Screw you!" I turn to leave. Luke grabs my wrist. I jerk away but he keeps his hold, wrenching me back to face him, I cry out in surprise.

Luke snarls his next words, face inches from mine.

"Just because somebody Fucks you doesn't mean they give a Shit about you."

"Let go of me before I turn that black eye into a matching set." My threat is a low hiss.

Luke leans back from me a little, hand still wrapped tight as iron around my wrist.

"I'm serious Fin. He doesn't give a God Damn about anything but a piece of ass, that's what you are to him; that's all you'll ever be… You're smarter than this; get your head out of your ass."

My other hand clenches into a fist. "I'm Serious Luke. Let Go."

"You best do as she says before we have a bigger problem."

My stomach drops like a rock.

Luke lets go, his hand drops limp to his side. He keeps his glare on me, ignoring Daryl completely.

"Think it over Finny. You know I'm right." He grabs the dropped ice pack from the sofa and leaves with quick and quiet footsteps never even acknowledging Daryl's shadow by the other ladder.

I keep staring at the wall as he climbs up; heading to bed I suppose—I don't really give a shit at this exact moment.

I'm too raw, empty and aching.

The hollow bubble in my chest expands more with each passing second of his continued silence; grows tighter and tighter pressing against the air in my lungs, crushing my heart 'til I feel like I'm going to implode.

It bursts when he finally speaks, shredding my insides to white hot ribbons of pain and humiliation. But I am strong.

"He's right."

The only outward sign in the darkness that I'm collapsing, bleeding to death on the inside is the slight shake in my knees, the tremble of my hands pressed against my pant legs. The single tear that slides down one cheek, hangs on the rim of my chin, tickling my skin…I don't brush it away though; if I do it will make it obvious to him that I'm crying.

I won't give him the satisfaction.

"You do deserve better."

A sharp bark of bitter laughter claws its way unbidden up my throat.

I shake my head staring up at the ceiling feel the tear drop fall from my skin; it lands on my collar with a silent splash. I tip my chin up to keep more from spilling over, keep staring at the blank ceiling for a few moments.

I can't speak around the lump in my throat until I've swallowed what feels like a hundred times. I pull my expression together with the last of my composure throw my arms out in a quick dismissing gesture. Spinning on my heels and backing towards the ladder, away from his still unmoving shadow in the dark.

"Well, I guess that's the least of my worries if all I am is a quick easy fuck."

I can't tell if he's looking at me, can't make out his face or any features in the darkness. Thank God.

Imagining this cruelty is hard enough, thinking about the sneer on his face the other day…seeing it now after this would be too much.

I might as well go pack a fucking bag.

I spin back around retreating he says nothing as I cross the distance to the ladder start to climb. I wait until I'm on the next floor to swipe at my cheeks with clenched fists; smearing the wetness gathered on them with furious jerks.

I keep climbing; ignore Carol and Sasha sitting around the fire pit when I reach the top level at last. I keep my head down pretend I don't notice their glances.

Voice's carry; it's easy to forget that in the middle of an argument. Remembering it now I feel like every word Luke said is plastered over my head in neon lights.

I keep walking head straight for my shed, desperate to get away from everyone before the heat behind my eyes turns into waterworks and my breath becomes an uncontrollable hitch.

I open the shed door and slam it closed behind me leaning my back against it's cool plastic surface. Standing here in the dark again the throbbing of my lip returns to me, I slide my tongue over it tasting copper. Brilliant.

I let my face drop into my hands for a moment, press my palms so tightly over my eyes I see flashes of red against the darkness. I continue to stand there for a moment listening to the world outside my door, no one approaches thank god. At least there's that small courtesy.

I shove away from the door and lay face down on my bed in the pitch black, grab the nearest pillow by feel and press my face to the soft fabric; uncaring if I smear the material with blood, all I can think about is trying to muffle the sobs.

:: Walking Dead ::