Notes: Thanks to all the readers! and reviews! :)
Chapter Seventy-One
(Fin's POV)
I wake to Daryl shaking me gently, one hand pressed to my shoulder.
I groan, stuff my face down into the pillow mumbling. "Five more minutes." My whole body feels heavy, drugged almost; I'm so tired.
His exhale sounds amused and soft at the same time. "Fin it's been an hour."
I pop my eyes open at that. "Seriously?"
He's staring down at me, sitting on the edge of the bed completely dressed. It's fully light out; far more sunlight filling the space around us then early dawn generally provides.
Judging by the amount of glare coming in through the overhead skylights…it's early afternoon.
"What the Hell Daryl…"
So much for an early start before the heat of the day hits.
I groan, roll face down and cover my head with my hands stretching.
God, why am I so tired lately? Daryl needs to stop wearing me out.
I roll onto my back again, my hip bumping into his side. He's still watching me face passive.
"I'm getting up I swear." I scrub my fingers over my eyes.
"You don't have to you know..."
I groan pulling myself to a sitting position almost crab walk to the end of the bed standing up. Not this again. I have to go with them, for reasons I can't ever explain to him. I can keep them all safe. I yawn hard. I just wish I didn't feel so damn wore out.
"I'm going." It's not up for discussion.
"Maggie can't go today."
I'm pulling a clean tank top on, stuffing my legs into pants, doing up my belt. I frown at him over my shoulder, know what he's hinting at. "I already told you, and you already know; that's not a problem for me."
His mouth is turned down in a tight scowl. "Even Michonne hangs back when she has to."
I yank my sleeved shirt over my head and glare at him. Just because Rick convinced Michonne to go along with this idea doesn't make it true. Michonne spent almost as long as I did alone; and I doubt she spent five days a month sitting on her ass in hiding afraid to attract Walkers.
I'm still not sure how this craziness got started in the first place.
He says nothing when I stalk back across the floor to stand right in front of him arms crossed tight over my chest. "It's not a problem yet, it might be at some point; but it's not right now. Okay?"
I'm starting to feel like a ticking time bomb. Every time he brings this up lately the urge to explode rises...
His voice is quiet. "You said a year…"
I raise my hand between us, cutting him off glaring down at him. I did say a year; and it's been probably 7 months since then…roughly guessing what with the heat of Summer firmly upon us now;but I'm still not bleeding and he should just fucking drop it already!
We don't even know if blood really draws there attention like that. It can't be any more noticeable then just having a warm pulse and heartbeat is... It's not like the dead naturally congregate around smears of blood left behind from previous victims…at least not that I've ever seen.
They like noise and movement; plan and simple… and maybe there's a hint of smell to it I can believe that; but I can't imagine it's that superior especially when all their other senses seem to degrade with time, not heighten.
They used to be humans; not dogs for Christ's Sake…
I also highly doubt that even if there was any truth to this theory that when the time comes it would matter for me in particular because they Never notice me; and he needs to let this insecurity go! If Glenn wants to convince Maggie it's a problem so he can keep her safe at home that's fine and dandy. I'm Not Maggie.
"What if…"
I slap my palm over his mouth shutting him up.
"Daryl! We don't even know if it's true, Okay? It's just a theory right now and if Maggie and Michonne and Sasha and Carol all want to follow it that's their choice; but I'm fine—" I growl the word at him through clenched teeth. "So either drop it or I'm going to knock your ass onto the floor!"
We stare at each other for a tense moment before he wraps his fingers around my wrist pulling my hand away slowly just enough so he can speak lips brushing my palm.
"Okay, you'd tell me if you weren't okay right?"
I stare at him dumbfounded. "Daryl, I think after last night, and this morning; you'd know if there was a problem." I watch him blush that realization hitting him.
There's a conversation that will be fun to have, Thank God it won't be today. Though it will have to be sometime in the near future. We're going to have to decide what to do when my birth control implant fails to protect me; not from Walkers but from sex.
That's the one I'm worried about. I can only imagine the total Manbeast my being pregnant would turn Daryl into… He'd probably go Ape-Shit every five seconds…
I've almost gotten used to his protective streak. Hell, I will never admit this to him; but there have been multiple times I've found his almost over-bearing nature to be incredibly fucking hot.
There's a thin line between chauvinist pig and protective caveman which Daryl frequently skirts with damn near perfect grace; always stopping just short of pushing too hard; usually right before I truly want to smack the shit out of him.
I shake my head; realize he's still staring at me with my palm still pressed over his mouth. I move my hand back slide my fingers through the dark hair at the back of his neck while he huffs out a heavy sigh. I lean down and press my lips to his for just a quick second.
"You need to relax, I'm fine."
I step back and grab my boots, slip them on and grab my climbing harness; there's no reason I should need it today on a gasoline and scavenging run but I like to be prepared.
He's still watching me when I clip my machete's onto my belt and tie the loops over the leather straps just above my knees keeping the blades covers tight against my legs so I can move un-hindered with them tethered flush to my legs.
"Ready to go?" It's a ridiculous question. He's been up for over an hour already. He nods and we head upstairs.
Mika all but ambushes me on the top floor. I have to stumble backwards a step even with Daryl's hand suddenly on the small of my back steadying me without comment.
"You're going today?" I nod at the top of her head, wrap my arms around her back squeezing her in a tight hug. She's almost as tall as me now… kids are all growing like weeds…
"I am, but I'll have my Walkie so keep yours on you and if I find something good I'll radio in 'kay?"
" 'kay, I wish I could go too…" She glances over her shoulder at Carol obviously hoping for permission.
"Soon Mika," Carol waves her back over to the bench. I can understand Carol wanting to keep her safe; but she's turned into a more then capable young lady over the long winter.
I've already taken Mika out for very short trips into the woods behind the warehouse so she could practice in the 'real world.' Molly and Carl have been too, what good are skills without practice?
Both Mika and Carl have become amazingly proficient at navigating a lot of the necessary skills of survival like self-defense, shelter, and Walker take-down-methods.
Mika especially I've had to give some serious individual attention to… She's handled the whole situation with a Hell of a lot more grace then I ever would have expected from such a young girl.
Sometimes I still don't think she fully grasps just how dangerous it could all turn with one simple slip up. She still believes that what she saw me do the night Lizzie died is some amazing magic trick. That because I saved her life even after she tried to end mine by leading me into an ambush planned out by Lizzie that makes me some kind of angel; and that I should tell them all the truth about what I can do.
'How can someone as good as you are be a Monster Fin?'
That was a heart-stopping conversation.
She still has no idea the truly horrible things I've done.
All the people that I couldn't save…
I still wonder if Mika wasn't so worried that Carol would hate her if she found out she shot Lizzie, if she would have told them already.
The fact that Carol already knows since she overheard Mika talking to me months ago about that secret used to gnaw at me. But Carol hasn't brought it up since, not with me or with Mika. I'm starting to seriously doubt she ever will; Mika seems happy and well-adjusted now. I doubt Carol would do anything to upset that if it wasn't absolutely necessary.
Molly would rather stay inside she's a lot younger than the other two still. Barely Eight years old; and not as interested in learning all the survival and self-defense techniques I've drilled into the other two over the last few months.
Molly mostly wants to follow Sasha and Beth around and help with Judith.
"Ready to go?" Carl is standing next to me when I look up. And I do mean up. I have to tilt my head back to see his face. I frown.
"Did you freaking grow overnight again? Jesus. Is there no one in this family I don't have to look up to during a conversation?"
He's grinning down at me, props his arm over my shoulders leaning into me hard enough I have to lock my knees under the weight.
"How is the air down there short stop?"
He reminds me so much of Luke lately it's almost too much. I mock glare at him for a second shaking my head.
"Seriously maybe one day you can grow big and strong too; In the meantime we can find you a booster seat..."
That's it.
I snap my arm up and out quickly to cuff him in the back of the head. He steps forward letting me go and grinning with an amused snicker. Tossing his head to see past the wild mop of far too much long dark hair falling into his eyes.
He keeps growing it like he is and pretty soon I'm going to have to start braiding it. I smirk at that thought.
"What?" Carl is still grinning hands shoved deep in his pockets now.
"You need a damn haircut kid." Daryl says it for me when he walks past us clapping Carl on the shoulder. He already has his crossbow slung over one shoulder, and my bow too; hands it to me silently as he goes by.
Carl's is already against his back, his revolver strapped to his thigh just in case, a hunting knife on his belt. I'm struck suddenly by just how little he resembles the hollow cheeked kid I first spotted backpedaling down the road coaxing Walkers into following him; and not just in height.
He looks more like Rick every day...
When he turns around to follow Daryl towards the ladder out to the roof I realize he's got another Walkie shoved into the back pocket of his jeans. If he and Mika talk back and forth on those things all day again we're going to have more dead batteries.
Guess I'll just have to keep an eye out for more today.
I shove him aside with my foot when we reach the ladder so I can climb ahead of him. "Ladies first Chewbacca."
Carl's sarcastic "Very funny Finny," is almost lost in Rick's near hysterical laughter echoing under the roof.
:: Walking Dead ::