Chapter 12: Make me forget

As soon as their day on set was finished, Matt and Kelly packed up and left through the back exit. Matt didn't really know what to do or say, so he just put his arm around Kelly and led her out of the building. They walked towards her apartment, Matt's arm never leaving her shoulder. Little was said during their walk home. It was Kelly who first started talking after a couple of blocks. 'I'm going to France tomorrow', she said in a soft tone. 'I'll come with you', Matt decided then and there. Kelly looked down looking at both their feet hitting the New York pavement continuing their way to her home.

'Thanks for walking me home', Kelly was again the first to break the painful silence between them as they arrived in front of her building. 'Kel, I can't possibly imagine what you're going through, but I want you to know that I'm here for you'. 'I know', she whispered with a broken voice before placing a soft kiss on his right cheek. 'I'll call you when I get back from France', she said. Matt was somewhat puzzled since he had just told her a couple of blocks ago he was willing to go with her. 'Kel, I'd like to take you up to your apartment and make sure you're safe.' She backfired: 'I am safe, Matthew! I'm home. I can take an elevator all by myself, thank you.' 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I just want to make sure you're okay.' 'Do you think I'll be okay once I'm inside? Is that what you think? That all my problems will be solved? That my kids will be home then?' Speechless, Matt just stood there. She looked at him with tears in her eyes. Anything he would have said would have come out wrong, so he just stepped closer to her and pulled her into his embrace. After a moment, he finally led her into the lobby of her building before taking her upstairs.

Matt saw her fumbling with the key and took it from her to open the door for them. 'Here, let me take off your shoes' he said as he led her to the living room of her apartment. Matt was trying to fill the silence with his words so it wouldn't be so goddamn quiet inside. Kelly let herself drop down on her white couch and let Matt take off her shoes. 'I'm worried about you, Kel. I meant it when I said I'd like to go to France with you'. One shoe was already off. 'I know', she whispered. 'But it's probably not a good idea.' 'Why not?', Matt asked working to get her second shoe off. Kelly turned her head away from his eyes and stared through her window which was only a meter away from where she was sitting. 'Because it would only make things more difficult once the appeal case starts'. Matt was trying to put the pieces together but couldn't figure out what she meant. 'I'm not following you, love', he said while resting his hands on her knees once both her feet were free from her shoes. Kelly took a deep sigh before she began: 'When Daniel and I decided to separate it was not just because I thought he was seeing other women.' She paused and looked at him. 'He accused me of having an affair with you'. 'What?' Matt shouted, 'that's absurd.' Kelly nodded slowly. 'I know, but he doesn't. I tried to tell him there was nothing going on between us back then. I guess he was just trying to turn things around so the court wouldn't put the blame on him. And, most of all, to make me look like the bad one in all of this.' Again she paused before she continued: 'You have no clue about all the things Daniel has blamed me for since we're divorced. First, he claimed we were having an affair. Then he accused me of nepotism and that I was with Marcus to "fuck" my way into the judge's approval since, you know, he's a lawyer and all.' Matt sighed. 'I just don't want to give him any more reason to keep me away from my kids', she confessed with a shaking fear in her voice. 'Kel, I wish you would have told me this'. She immediately reacted: 'I didn't know we were going to eventually be together, I didn't think it mattered then'. Matt sat up on his knees so he was now fully facing her. Again, he took her into his arms, rubbed her back and comforted her as long as she needed him to.

'How 'bout I make us some dinner?' Matt asked Kelly who had never looked paler. 'I'm not hungry', she said tiredly. 'I just want to rest', she said. 'Why don't I draw you a warm bath? You can relax while I make dinner and if you're up for it, you can have something to eat afterwards.' Kelly didn't say anything. Matt just stood up, went to her bathroom and set everything up for Kelly to have a relaxing bath. He made sure the water had just the right temperature, he put on some soft music and lit up a couple of candles. He then went back to the living room where he saw Kelly sitting in exactly the same position she was in minutes ago, just staring right in front of her, into nothingness. 'Kel', he whispered. No reaction. He went to the couch, stood in front of her and extended his hands. She looked at him, grabbed his hands and stood as he slowly pulled her up. 'Come on, let's get you into your bath', Matt said as he walked her the bathroom. She was taken aback by how he had transformed her bathroom into an haven of calmness. She sat down on the side of her bathtub as he unbuttoned her blouse for her. He slowly slid her blouse off her shoulders. He then reached behind her back to unlatch her bra. He pulled it from her arms and let it fall to the floor. He took her hands in his again and again raised her to her feet. He pulled the zipper on the side of her skirt and slid it off to her feet. Finally he reached for her panties and pulled them all the way down until they were reunited with her skirt on the floor. Matt took Kelly's left hand in his right and guided her into the bathtub. She bent through her knees before sitting down and sliding all the way into the hot water. 'I'll be back in a while', Matt said placing a tender kiss on her hair.

Matt went to the kitchen and opened Kelly's fridge to see what he could find to prepare her a meal. There were some tomatoes, some cheese. If he could find some pasta, he figured he'd make her some spaghetti. Murphy's Law was apparently playing tricks with him as he found the pasta in the last cupboard he opened. He chopped up the tomatoes, added some herbs and spices he found on Kelly's terrace and put on some water to cook the pasta. While everything was simmering on Kelly's stove, he went to the bathroom to check on her. He slowly opened the door and saw Kelly still lying underneath the bubbles. Her eyes were closed but he could definitely see the remains of the tears she had shed. Just when he wanted to close the door and return to the kitchen, she spoke softly: 'That smells heavenly'.

Matt went to the bathtub and kneeled beside Kelly. 'Dinner is almost ready', he said, 'are you hungry?' Kelly turned her head and looked at Matt, it broke his heart to see the sadness hidden behind her beautiful brown eyes. She closed her eyes, shook her head and let a tear fall from her face. 'Come on', Matt said, 'let's get you dried up.' Just as Kelly was about to get up herself, Matt put his hands in the water, one arm going underneath her legs and the other going around her back. He scooped her up like she was light as a feather and put her on her feet on the bath mat beside the tub. 'Now you're all wet', Kelly spoke. 'I don't care', was his reply as he took a towel and rubbed her dry before putting on the robe hanging on her bathroom door. 'There, you're all set. Come on.' He pushed her in front of her all the way to the kitchen where he sat her down on one of the high chairs that were by her counter. He took the seat next to her and filled both their plates with pasta and spaghetti sauce. Matt started eating, he was quite hungry to be honest. He was happy to see Kelly was at least trying to get something in her stomach, although it was just a little. They sat there, eating in silence for a moment when suddenly Kelly let her hands fall in front of her face. Matt's heart broke into a million pieces, seeing the woman he loves so devastated. He stood up, went to stand behind her and put his arms around her neck. His head touched the side of hers and in her ear he whispered: 'I'm so sorry, Kel.' She touched his hands that were resting on her chest and slowly turned around in his embrace. She kissed the corner of his mouth, then his cheek and finally went to search for his ear. Although she was still sobbing, she placed a soft kiss on his earlobe before whispering ever so quietly: 'Make me forget, Matt.'