Chapter 1

"Kouta!"

I sat up hurriedly in panic. Looking around quickly – a regular room was unexpected. Confusion took over my face, and my mind started coming up with as many theories as it could that wouldn't sound insane.

Well let's think. I could've been kidnapped… I could have temporary amnesia, I could've fallen into a coma for seven years and am only waking up now and soon people will come into the room claiming they're my family… Yeah, the first one is a little farfetched. Oh A-… ah? I was going to say my name.

A…

Ah…

Aw?

What in the world was my name? I swear it starts with an 'A', since that was the first movement and sound my mouth made.

Maybe it is just temporary amnesia… I'll walk around. Perhaps something will trigger this mind of mine.

I stood up, but immediately felt something off. Besides the dizzy darkening vision due to standing up too fast, I swore I was taller. Or maybe I shrunk in the time I was out? I don't even know if I ever was out. Maybe this had been my life all along… Like I said, temporary amnesia was not only possible, it was likely.

Ah yes, a mirror. Hadn't spotted it before because, well, new place and all.

"Woah!" I fell back.

No offense to me but… I thought I was female? I'm pretty sure it's generally an innate thing, you know, knowing your gender.

I put a hand to my face as a thought made itself known.

"Am I… gay?"

I couldn't be! I like Kyoko-chan!

I looked around. Was that my thought? No it wasn't. I don't know any Kyoko-chans. "Hello?"

HIEEE! Why am I talking to myself?

But I'm not. I have no control over these—"Ow-!" I clutched my head. Thoughts were filling it way too fast.

But I like Kyoko-chan! I could not forget about her at all! She has such an angelic smile and she cares about everyone and I just… really like her! And why do I have to remind myself of this? I should know this- Why am I not aware—

"Would you shut UP?" I yelled. Fantastic, now I'm going mad. I have to tell myself to shut up.

Did I just tell myself to shut up? But—

"I said shut. Up." Great now I'm threatening myself. Okay. Let's think.

That's a good thing to start—

If I could glare at myself, I would've. Does my mind just not listen?

I waited a moment.

Thank the heavens. It's quiet.

Okay start over. One thought at a time. What, when, where, who, how… why.

"Hello? Is anyone there." I call out to the room. No answer—

Well obviously there's no one there I mean it's my room there's no need for anyone else to be in here.

Okay. That didn't hurt as much as when thoughts of 'Kyoko-chan', whoever that is, were being screamed directly into my head.

But those thoughts are not mine. Why am I thinking in first person when I'm not the one thinking the thoughts?

A weird realization hit me from the inside and I voiced it out, "My thoughts are independent?" [1]

I started panicking slightly, "So then who are you?"

I'm me?! This is my body! I'm Tsunayoshi Sawada!

"You have a name?!"

Don't you?!

Panic and confusion were just loving us at this point.

"I don't remember my name!"

Surely you had some form of being called?

"Well yeah probably but I don't remember it that's the problem!"

"Tsu-kun!"

I whipped my head towards the door, "Who was that?"

Uh, my mom.

"So you can hear what I think too?

You haven't really been thinking… I can hear you when you speak aloud.

"Okay. Okay, yeah that's not weird at all, now let me just go and slowly try pinch myself as I try to return to the sane world…" I pinched my cheek as hard as I could.

Itee! That hurt!

Hearing his voice in my head, I sighed. "You can feel what I do, too?" I shook my head, "Is it like a regular day in your life?"

Um well kind of, except-

"Tsu-kun!" I hear her voice get louder as she walks up what I assume are stairs, "You're going to be late!"

Tell her okay!

Following orders without thinking I yelled back "Ah, uh-Okay!"

Be down in a minute!

"Be down in a minute!"

I can't afford to be late otherwise I'll get bitten to death by Hibari-san! Let's just get ready for now.

"Ah, okay." When I turned into a meek 10 year old, I don't know. "How old are you?"

Thirteen. How about you, uh…

"Can you just give me a random name? I really can't remember." I opened one of his dresser drawers. "And can you tell me what exactly it is that you usually wear?"

Um, I wear a uniform; it's the white shirt, tie, jacket, and pants. [2]

"Do I just put on random uh…"

J-just grab one and put it on. Without looking!

"'Kay.." I blindly reached into the drawer and changed with my eyes closed. A little hard when you're not used to the body you're in.

What about Airi?

My brows furrowed, "What?"

For your temporary name, I mean.

"Airi seems fine." I smile. "You seem to be taking this quite well."

A-ah, no actually, I'm just trying to be helpful. In a slightly quieter thought, he added for once.

"Okay I got dressed. Now what?" I look at myself in the mirror. "You have a killer bedhead. Do you ever pass a comb through it?"

My face got a little red,

It's normally like this…

"And now?" I decided to be gracious and skip over the topic.

Uh, breakfast?

"You seemed so much more confident before I pointed it out – relax, it's not like I can eat you." Talking to the air and actually getting a response was new to me, but a problem came out of those thoughts. "Can I think for myself?"

I don't know- if you can, I can't tell.

"No, you don't understand, I'm trying to think of what this means but nothing – It's like my mind decided to stop working spontaneously." I grabbed the bag on the door handle before leaving the room. He told me it was his school bag offhandedly.

Walking down the steps, my legs decided it was a perfect time to practice tango, which resulted in a HIEE from my head and an "AHH!" from me.

I don't even know how this happens, but I even flipped backwards while I was falling. Hands flailing for something to hold on to and failing miserably, I fell on my back. "Ughh…"

Oww…

"Why did this happen." I just lied there staring at the ceiling. "Does this happen often? My surprise seemed half-hearted."

Um, yeah, maybe.

"Fantastic."

"Tsu-kun?" I look up to see a young woman with short straight hair that reached to her chin, and kind eyes that reminded me of—

"Ah!" I slapped myself on the face. "Ow." Without meaning to, of course. Pain had attacked me when I started remembering something. "Maybe that's what happens when I think?"

A puzzled look crossed her face, "Tsu-kun, stop mumbling and eat, or you're going to be late." She stretched her hand out, and I took it gratefully. "Thanks."

Why did you have to slap yourself? A whine filled my head. A whine? More like a complaint.

"Well maybe if you hadn't been so clumsy all this could have been avoided." I mumble. I figure it's not very good if she hears me talk aloud when there's no one here but her.

AHH! Airi-san we're late!

"Oh no, call the reinforcements, we're going to die." I munched on some toast. Quick breakfast, I guess.

Let's go!

"Uh, painful whining inside my head. I'm going to go now, or I'll be late." I waved to his mother, "Bye!"

I stuffed my – his? – these – feet into the shoes and started running. I don't even know which way school supposedly is, but I guess with his thoughts in my head, my body just went for it.

"I think minor thoughts are okay, but thorough thoughts that require more than 3 seconds of attention make my head hurt." I reasoned.

It seems so. Either way, I can't actually move my body or do anything other than be a passenger, basically.

"Well, as long as you're not a whiny teen, I'm okay. Also you can't think too much. Puts stress on the brain." I looked in front of me, actually taking in detail.

A large gate, with students milling in semi-quietly but quickly, and some – a little old looking, but they were wearing uniforms – had, if I may say, incredible hairstyles. "Who are they?"

That's the Disciplinary Committee. But you should really look out for – ah.

"What?" I look around, and bump into something. "Sorry," Looking up, I see a frowning face. "Who-?"

IT'S HIBARI!

"That's…" I lift my hand as if I were going to point, but hold back on that.

"Get to class, you only just made it. Next time I'll bite you to death." He threatened.

I nodded slightly and scurried off.

"That was Hibari?"

Yeah, he beats you up if you're late.

"You would know."

Uhm…

Waving my hand as if I was actually talking to a separate person I continued, "But he's actually quite good looking, you know. If you skip the frown. And the threats."

Hah?!

"If you ever do decide that you play for the other team, you should go with him." I suggested, trying to look uninterested. Of course, there was really no point in doing so because he couldn't see me.

I like Kyoko-chan!

"Oh yeah, who is that anyway? I take it some pretty girl—do I take my shoes off here?" I motioned towards the shoe lockers.

Yeah – Kyoko-chan is not just some pretty girl! She's kind, caring, and the most popular girl in our school.

I could just feel the icky aura emanating off of myself. "Which means you don't have a chance."

Not one.

"Nice loser complex." I said.

"Hah! Now No-Good-Tsuna talks to himself too? You've gone absolutely insane!" I heard a jeer from my right.

"Well I guess it was getting lonely by himself, huh?" I heard another voice behind me.

"Tsunayoshi, who are these people?" I ask quietly.

"Are you talking to yourself in third person?" He poked at my rib.

"Trying to be cute? Or are you actually going mad?" He laughed.

Um, well, I-

"Maybe you should try not being No-Good. Oh sorry, forgot it's just your nature!" He laughed.

"Tsunayoshi? Who are they? I don't think they're friends but you never know, I mean, unhealthy friendships and all."

No actually they're-

I tried listening to what Tsunayoshi was saying, not that it was possible.

"Trying to ignore us? You can't, you're just—"

"For the DEAR LOVE OF GOD I literally can't even hear myself think would you just shutup for one second?" I yelled. Temporarily stunning them, I hurried away until I was closer to what I assumed were classrooms.

"You were saying?"

Ah, um, I didn't… I didn't know you could be that loud Airi-san.

"I guess. I don't really know why, but I actually felt like I could go a little louder." My voice was raspy, "guess you're usually a little quieter, huh."

Well, yeah. I don't usually stand up for myself much either, I guess.

"Woah stop beating yourself up man. You could've probably taken them. Maybe. Some luck necessary." Not being mean, but they were at least 10 centimeters taller than me. "I heard them call you – me – No-Good-Tsuna. Why is that?"

Well, I'm just… no good at everything I do.

"Everything?"

Sports, academics, general socialization. Everything.

I felt myself slump a little with each category said. So that means I affect him and he affects me- we are sharing one body, I guess. A small thought occurred to me, and with my situation, I couldn't exactly hold it in without it hurting.

"So, hey, question, how do you usually avoid those situations? Given how at this point I can't think for myself and they're so loud I can't hear you, we should figure out a way to get out of it any time it happens. Which, if I'm not wrong, is actually kind of often." I said. "Oh and where do we go now? Where's your classroom?"

It's 1-A. And I… don't. I can't.

"It'd be nice if you included directions. Whatever, I'll just let muscle memory take over. And what do you mean you can't? Are they blackmailing you into putting up with their bullying or something?"

It upstairs and to the right… and I just physically can't. I can't outrun them, and they always seem to know where I am. Besides, it's not always physical harm, sometimes it's just teasing.

"Ah, I let the gates open didn't I?" I huffed.

Huh?

"I mean your feelings all just came pouring out. We'll have to hold off on this conversation – actually, maybe you should just continually talk, not too fast. Because I don't know what will happen if I can't talk for a while and I can't think either. I don't think my mind can just stay blank for that long." I said. "I'm about to walk in, get ready for a listening only therapy session."

Uh, okay?

"Oh hey look, here comes No-Good-Tsuna!" someone from the room announced, making all heads turn towards me.

"Seriously man? Seriously." I said under my breath. "I swear to God just let me beat them all- beat?" I looked at the fist I made. I'm not a violent person. Am I? This morning's predicament was brought back to the surface. The questions of who I was, specifically. I mean, I couldn't have just popped out of nowhere… I had a life, a family – maybe – maybe I lived in an orphanage, I don't know.

My head started pounding from the inside due to all the thoughts that flooded it in that instant. Clutching my head, I silently fell to my knees. A little dramatic, but it literally felt like someone had decided to put a seed in my head and then it bloomed and it turned out to be a chainsaw, tearing at the edges of my brain.

"Tsunayoshi please talk do something I don't know just make it STOP!" I screamed.

Airi! Airi it's fine! What do I say? Augh, don't think? Think of it physically hurting I don't know I have never dealt with something like this before!

"So helpful." I said sarcastically. It stopped hurting for a little while. "Just keep from actually thinking. Can't think. No thinking allowed. Okay? Doesn't matter who you are." To others, I probably sounded like I actually did go mad. "Sorry Tsunayoshi, I think I ruined your last bit of any kind of positive image. Now they think you're insane, too."

It's okay. It actually hurt me too, but I don't think in the way it did to you. And…

"And what?" Even though I was feeling kind of normal again, I remained in the same position, if only to prolong the whispers.

Y-you can call me Tsuna. Saying Tsunayoshi over and over must be a bit of a mouthful, I think.

"Well, if you're okay with it, then fine. And it's not that long; I mean, it's not like it's Yukinanakuroshitsuhime."

I'm amazed you could say that without fumbling. I felt myself deadpan.

"It's not that hard to put some syllables together." I pulled my hands away from my head. "Ready to face the world?"

Not really-

"Well that's too bad. Here we go!"

~o~o~o~

I think you guys should know that this will probably be how future chapters look. Due to the nature of this story, lots of speech will be happening, and because I find it easier to keep track when a new speaker starts on a new line, then well, I kept to that.

[1]- Yeah I italicized messily there, since they're both thinking/saying it.

[2]- I looked up uniforms, but for males it said it was a gakuran. However, that's not the kind of uniform they wear at Namimori, and when I tried to search up other types of uniforms, all that came up were girls in different kinds of skirts.

Please tell me what you think in the reviews! I'll be continuing regardless, but if there's no interest, I won't bother posting it and just write it for myself.