Stage Sixteen: Return

I found him exactly where I left him. He was sitting at his desk, back to the window, as it always was. His cascade of raven hair fell loose about his shoulder blades, flowing forward as he leaned over some scroll or book.

I wondered aimlessly if he had even missed me. His gaze was set into my eyes, his golden irises showing no emotion at all. I could see his chest rise and fall rhythmatically. There was no one to greet me, telling me that life had been hell, as it usually was without me there. He was so moody.

He sighed. I silently braced myself for his wrath, expecting hell to break loose. He looked at me with a flicker of change in his eye; I realized that I was seeing for the first time some emotion other than anger. It confused me, because I couldn't tell which human emotion it was. Orochimaru was incapable of so many.

"Tatsuki-chan," he whispered.

He hadn't called me Tatsuki-chan since I was a child. My eyes flickered back and forth, searching my mind for an answer. Something wasn't right. Where was his rage? Why was he showing his gentle side? I haven't 'needed' him to be gentle at all, not since my thirteenth birthday when I began to toughen out the innocent kinks of childhood.

"Tsuki, look me in the eye," he growled. There was possessive control, a will to be obeyed in his voice. This took my ease to a lighter level.

"Yes, Orochimaru-Sensei." My gaze lifted to search his eyes, honey golden and seemingly on fire with some unknown expression. I was beginning to feel the only emotion he had squandered out of me successfully: fear.

"I regret the news I must bear you, as it is just as catastrophic for me as well."

"News?" I asked. The expression in his eyes wasn't regret at all. Orochimaru never felt guilt, not for anything.

"The Sound Five have been killed," he blatantly stated.

He was watching me. Two of my friends were now gone. The only two friends I had were killed on a mission. They were only ever called the Five when they were on a mission. Anger flickered inside me, then sorrow for their lives. I went through an entire spectrum of heated emotions, not allowing any of them to stay for long.

"Why did you send Kimimaro on a mission, when his condition required him to stay? If he was well, he would have lived," I growled.

"It was his wish, Child. He wanted to fight."

My anger for his death was ebbed a tad; it was a relief to him, I assumed. Better to be killed than to waste away slowly, I would figure. I was glad his suffering was put to an end. "What of Tayuya?" I asked. She was the only woman I had ever connected with, besides Kin. I felt more for her as far as a friendship went, simply because she knew Orochimaru more. Kin, she thought he was human, that he had compassion. When she talked to him, she made several mistakes in attempting to play his emotions. She didn't realize that he couldn't be played in such a way. There were so many things he couldn't feel. Love was one of those that she thought he needed, but he simply didn't want.

He allowed my thoughts to wander, something he wouldn't normally permit. He watched the emotions flicker over me, choosing not to elaborate on her passing. He grabbed my attention back from the depths of my clouded mind by clearing his throat with a short staccato of a sound, harsh against the silence that had passed. "I understand that you are feeling a variety of emotions that are, of course, natural to witness upon the passing of a friend. However, it is best not to dwell on these things. There are several points that we need to address."

"Yes, Orochimaru sensei."

"One of which was your most recent disappearance. The five wouldn't have died if they had you among your ranks. Where were you?" His tone was still calm, but I knew it all too well. Despite his state of being on the edge of rage, my body eased. All was well with Orochimaru.

"Gaara had acted on a promise he made to me, Sensei."

Orochimaru rose and came around to the front of his desk. There was nothing but open space between us now. He could close on me with two strides. "What promise would this be, my Child?" His voice uttered these soft spoken words, but I had come to know this deceivingly sweet disposition as danger.

"He promised to make me pay for what I did to him at the Chuunin exams, and along with that, I would never leave his side. He stated boldly that he would destroy everyone around me, until he stood alone, with no one in his way, competing for my time."

"He is doing this to be able to love you?" Orochimaru asked, that flicker of hatred surfaced for a mere moment, then was forced back below his façade.

"He is doing this to destroy me," I answered. "He admitted that I had won over his heart on multiple occasions, but he simply wished to destroy everyone who wanted me destroyed so he had no competition."

"You are here, so he clearly didn't destroy you." Orochimaru arched one of his thin eyebrows in a quizzical expression.

"He released me upon our arrival to Sunagakure. He said it was a gift from him, now that he had been promoted to Kazekage. He explained that he cannot waste his time on a grudge of fleeting importance, but has to instead focus on his village and his country."

"What was this gift?" Orochimaru asked.

I knew it was a lie, a stupid thing to tell Orochimaru, but I couldn't tell him what had really happened. "He said that his gift was to steal me away from you, and this in itself was a punishment. He was certain that upon my arrival to Otogakure, you would have me killed for insubordination."

"This gift sounds more like a punishment," Orochimaru stated. "His delusion was not correct; I do not intend to kill you merely for disappearing for less than a week. How could he have come to the conclusion that you would not return?"

I decided to thread some truth into this tapestry of a lie. "He was under the impression that I was in love with you."

Orochimaru's eyes widened. This was not what he expected. "How could that have happened?" he angrily growled. He indeed crossed the distance between us, and I foolishly allowed him to back me against one of the book cases that lined the walls of his office. "How could you let him assume any weakness within you?" He leaned against the wall of books, hands to either side of my face, allowing no escape.

"I told him from the start that he was wrong my Lord. I feel nothing toward you. He simply thought that because I didn't want him, I must have wanted someone better."

Flattery was something that didn't normally work on Orochimaru. He knew when he was being sucked up to and normally why. I set my gaze into stone and allowed my eyes to meet his. His brows were furrowed, nearly together as he snarled down at me. I refused to think of the tendrils of hair caressing my shoulders, or allow the snippets of dreams that rose to the surface as I recalled why he gripped my wrist so hard, just for mindlessly running my fingers through his silken soft hair. "How do you plan to correct this mistake?" he asked. "I noticed your protector plate was missing upon your last return, so I simply cannot send you to Suna as my Konoichi."

My hand slipped to my kunai pouch. Seeing a possible attempt to defend myself, he grabbed my wrists and forced them above my head. "I wasn't going to attack you," I growled.

"I don't know what you will and will not do, Child," he sneered.

"I didn't misplace my headband," I informed him. "I simply took it off. It was best for people to believe that I wasn't associated with you when I left. It is because of this that I can still walk through Konohagakure without being associated with the third Hokage's death. It's in my kunai pouch." I thought it was best to leave Neji out of this. I wouldn't repay his silence with his death.

His left hand encircled my wrists tightly as his right slid down my leg to the leather pouch. I felt it unsnap as he unfurled the violet cloth he found within. I couldn't control the flares of skittering sparks his touch invoked.

"It doesn't excuse your leaving," he softly growled. His grip released on me, and blood flooded my hands. I rubbed the now inflamed skin where he had cut off circulation. "Furthermore, I want to know why you left."

"I left to give Gaara the impression he was right. He wasn't going to tell me anything at the Chuunin exams. His wrath created a flaw within him. He was determined then to destroy me. I plotted ahead with a final attack on his mind and emotions, then disappeared without a trace."

"Where did you go?"

"I originally left to Sunagakure, where I could find out more information upon his return. If there was a plot against you, odds are someone there knew it. Wouldn't it make sense to you that someone there would be lose with their information? Why guard something if you knew all of your opponent's eyes and ears were focused hundreds of miles away?" I knew this was another lie, but one that I could easily enforce with all the truth that backed it up.

"The world 'originally' implies that another destination had been reached," he commented. "I'll repeat the question, where did you go?"

"There was an Akatsuki ambush waiting for me when I went back to the Dentsu compound."

"That is why the Akatsuki was active in the Land of Rivers," he commented. "You escaped from their grasp and found your way back here."

"Yes and no," I answered. Here comes more of the truth. "I told you that Gaara had promised to keep me close at hand. Being a Jinchuriki, I find this all extremely rash on his part, but he had taken it upon himself to rescue me from their grasp. He personally escorted me back to Sunagakure to extract his revenge. I got tired of him, defeated him once more, then forced my way forward back home. There was no word of any plot against you, thus my work was done."

Orochimaru sat back down at his desk, laying the band before him on the desk. "I too have come to this conclusion. Now that I understand your reasons for leaving, I wish to know what your reasons were for not telling me first." He gestured for me to sit before him.

I assumed my chair to his right, my left. This was always where I was to be seated. Few others were allowed this privilege. I could still see the dent in the wood from all the times I had slammed my head into the grain. "I was sure that someone would go to you when I was gone. If you were surprised at my departure, then Gaara would assume that he was right. There would be no other explanation for my abrupt disappearance. Besides, I heard you obtained Sasuke through my exodus. It benefited you in more ways than one."

"I cannot deny that Sasuke was persuaded in part because of you. I am pleased to know you were acting out of my orders, and not because of this child's foolish idea that you were smitten with me."

If I could have let out a sigh, I would of. Orochimaru believed me. Here stands the man I once believed could hear you thinking a lie before you spoke it, but perhaps he is more inclined to hear what he wishes.

"If you heard that Sasuke had accompanied the Four here, then you must have gone back to Konohagakure."

"I did, Sensei. I had left some things at the apartment that I had wished to retrieve. Nothing that would have compromised you, but personal things."

"I assume that went well?" he inquired.

"Yes, it did."

"Upon Kimimaro's death, there remains the factor of the male genetics that will go into creating my next generation of Shinobi."

I hadn't thought of this since I explained it to Gaara. "With your obsession over the Sharingan, why not use Sasuke?" I asked. "An Uchiha's genetics would surely do well to replace Kimimaro."

Orochimaru thought for a brief moment as he considered the benefits of my chakra added to an Uchiha's, as well as the Sharingan. "This could not be done," he concluded. "Sasuke has taken to you, Child."

I recalled Sasuke's jealousy towards Gaara, and how he had avoided me after confessing his grievances. "I understand."

Orochimaru considered his own thoughts, ones I couldn't see. He shuffled through the bottom drawer, pulling two files. I could see, though being far away, that one was mine, and one was Sasuke Uchiha's. "Your blood type, it is O, is it not?" he asked, shuffling through Sasuke's file.

"Yes," I answered.

"Kabuto!" Orochimaru summoned his page, and there was an instant sneer on my features.

Kabuto entered, and upon seeing me, continued taunting me.

"Let me guess, Lord Orochimaru," he paused to push his glasses up his nose. How I longed to break them and shove the pieces through his eyes. "You need her escorted down to the arena to be tortured for her defiance?"

Orochimaru quickly shot a glare at Kabuto that could have stabbed like a kunai. "It is my understanding that O type blood can be given to any blood type."

"Yes my Lord," Kabuto agreed. "You should also be able to give any blood type to an O type patient, logically speaking."

This was obviously what Orochimaru wanted to hear. He dismissed Kabuto without making further inquiries, possibly to prevent me from setting Kabuto on fire again. Before Kabuto reached the door, Orochimaru stopped him by adding, "Bring Sasuke Uchiha to me."

"Yes, my Lord. I'll summon him straight away."