All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer; I just like to play with her characters.
No copyright infringement is intended.
HUGE thanks to my betas darcysmom and twimom817 and my pre-reader Edwardsmyobsession1971. HUGE hugs to these three fantastic ladies for their unending support and encouragement.
Note: I'm not usually one for attaching songs to my stories, but I heard this song yesterday (It wasn't the first time, but it was the first time I really listened to the lyrics) and I thought that some of the lyrics were appropriate for this story.
Leaving you makes me wanna cry
These bruises make for better conversation
Loses the vibe that separates
It's good to let you in again
You're not alone in how you've been
Everybody loses
We all got bruises
We all got bruises
I would love to fix it all for you
(I would love to fix you too)
Please don't fix a thing whatever you do
Bruises by Train
When You Least Expect It
Chapter Fourteen
Absence
If I thought that packing up my worldly possessions and leaving the house I'd shared with my husband of eight years was hard – it was nothing compared to saying goodbye to Edward before he left for Australia. The worst part of it all – we weren't at a point where we could pull each other into a loving embrace and hold each other let alone share a sweet parting kiss.
I couldn't allow myself to wallow in the fact that Edward would be gone for eight weeks. It's not like I'd have time to wallow anyway – I had packing to do. Because Mike continued to put money in our joint checking account – which I assumed was out of guilt, and my job as Edward's personal chef, I could finally afford a place for Kaden and me to live on our own. Each payday, I transferred a little bit of money from my joint account with Mike into my personal account. I also transferred some money into Kaden's savings account but I had a sinking feeling I wouldn't be able to do that for much longer.
Alice had a customer who was in real estate and owned a couple condos. She was just waiting on the old tenants to move out and have some updating done before it would be available. I'd looked at one of them over the Christmas holidays and fell in love with the first one I looked at.
The condo was a cozy two bedroom two bathroom bungalow of sorts located in the Hollywood Hills. The neighborhood was nice and well-kept. The bonus was the decent sized yard for Koda and Kaden to run around in. It also helped that it wasn't far from Edward's house or Kaden's school. My dad would still pick Kaden up from school a few days a week for me which would allow them time together while I was at work.
"Bells … you know you don't have to go. You and Little Man are welcome to stay here as long as you like."
"I know that, Dad, but do you have any idea how weird it is to move back in with you after living on my own for eleven years? After I've built a home of my own filled with my things? I miss that."
"I know, Bells. It gives this old man peace of mind knowing that you're being looked after though."
I nodded.
"I appreciate that, Dad. Just like I appreciate everything that you've done in the past and continue to do for Kaden and me. I … I can't thank you enough."
Dad pulled me in for a hug and kissed the top of my head.
"I'm gonna miss you two around here. Especially my mornings with my Little Man." He admitted.
"Dad … we're not going that far. You can see Kaden as much as you want and you know that."
Edward had been extremely busy since he arrived in Australia and like he said, because of the weirdness of the time zones, our communication was limited to email and texting. I warned him that I wouldn't be available for a few days because I was moving out of my dad's house and into a little condo. Edward of course, emailed me back insisting that I let him arrange for movers to come and transport our things.
Alice had managed to help me round up a few people to help us move our things out of the storage unit and into the condo but Edward insisted that things happen and volunteers can't always be relied upon. After several emails back and forth arguing about it, I finally relented and I was contacted by a moving company the very next day.
In reality, the movers had been a blessing. In a little over three hours, they had unloaded my storage unit, carried all the boxes out of my father's house and were on their way to our new condo. I felt bad leaving Koda with my dad while the movers carried everything in but it was for the best. I couldn't, however, talk Kaden into staying behind with my dad, allowing Alice to help me guide the movers where to put everything but it was easier only having Kaden underfoot.
When I left Tacoma, I'd sold everything except my washer and dryer, refrigerator, a dining room set, china cabinet and hutch that my parents bought shortly after we bought our first house; my queen sized bed, our 47" flat screen TV, a few odd pieces of furniture that I loved and all of Kaden's bedroom furniture. Dad laughed at me as we packed the moving truck – I had seven totes of Christmas decorations, two Christmas trees, three Halloween totes, one fall tote, one Easter tote, two huge totes of home décor, three large picture frame boxes filled with artwork and ten boxes that included my clothes and shoes. That doesn't include all the boxes I had filled with Kaden's things.
I splurged on a brand new bedroom set for myself and bought a new couch for the living room since I hadn't brought one with me.
After the movers had left and Alice and I finally sorted all the boxes into the appropriate rooms, we collapsed onto the couch in relief.
"I need a beer." Alice giggled.
"Me too," I sighed.
"Have you heard from Edward lately?"
"A couple days ago. He knew that I was busy with the move this weekend and I promised him that I'd be in touch after we got settled in."
"He likes you, Bella," Alice said accusingly.
I couldn't' do anything but nod because I knew of Edward's intentions. I closed my eyes for a moment and allowed myself to think of him and how sweet he was as I broke down in front of him while telling him about Mike. Edward didn't judge me and he offered me comfort when I needed it the most. Suddenly, I had the urge to call him and tell him I missed him. I knew I'd have to wait until after Alice left to make the call though. Instead, I asked her about Jasper.
"He's loving his job. He hates that he's so far away though."
I nodded.
"I'm pregnant," Alice blurted out.
"What?"
"I'm pregnant."
Alice's smile was so bright it was blinding. I could tell that there was something off about her all day but I couldn't put my finger on what it was.
"Oh my God, does Jazz know?"
"Yeah. We found out a few days before he left. The doctor confirmed it a few days after."
"Alice!" I cried. "That is so exciting! Congratulations!"
"Thanks, Bella. I was hoping that maybe you'd come to my doctor appointments with me while Jazzy's gone."
While I was happy for Alice and Jazz, the thought of going with her to her doctor appointments made my heart hurt. Memories of going to the doctor when I was pregnant with Kaden flooded my mind and it made me realize that there was a very real possibility that Kaden wouldn't have any siblings. When Mike and I first talked about starting a family, we both wanted a house full of kids and we agreed that four was the perfect number. That was before the fertility issues and long before Mike ever thought about leaving.
I knew I couldn't leave Alice to fend for herself though. I promised Jasper that Alice and I would take care of each other in his absence. Jasper and I were thick as thieves when we were in college – even if we went to different schools. We were roommates and best friends. When Alice came to visit me, Jasper fell in love with her immediately. He was even there when Alice encouraged Mike to talk to me. Jasper never liked Mike and it was one of the reasons that we'd drifted apart. Well, that and the fact that Mike and I moved to Tacoma while Alice and Jasper settled in Los Angeles.
When I moved in with my dad, I was hurt, depressed and a bit broken. Jasper had taken to spending all his free time with me – which I have to admit, wasn't much but it was more than I had the right to ask for. He reminded me how strong I was – that it wasn't Mike that made me that way. It was exactly what I needed to pick up the pieces of my life and start living again.
Kaden and I settled into our new condo. Koda didn't care where we lived as long as she was with us. She'd been my constant companion since Kaden was born and she made the transition between dad's house and the condo like a champ.
I continued to talk to Edward as much as his schedule would allow. Since I wasn't going to work every day, I'd taken to helping out at Kaden's school a couple days a week to occupy my time. Edward had been gone about a month when I felt an ear infection coming on. I'd had horrible ear infections since I was a kid so I learned as I got older that when I could feel it coming to call and make an appointment to see the doctor. I called and made my appointment – thinking nothing of it and a couple hours later the doctor's office called back and told me that my insurance had expired.
"What?" I asked.
"I'm sorry, Mrs. Newton but you are no longer covered by the insurance company we have on file. Did you get a new policy?"
No longer covered? Did Mike actually have the audacity to cancel my coverage?
I apologized to the girl at the doctor's office and told her that I would pay cash when I came in because my ear infection would only get worse otherwise. When I ended the call with my doctor's office, I immediately called Kaden's pediatrician. Kaden was no longer covered by insurance either. That thought made my blood boil. Since he had been in the hospital, Dr. Bones had found a heart murmur. Then he referred us to a children's cardiologist who had told us that it was something that he would grow out of especially because it hadn't been detected until after he'd been in the hospital with a high grade fever. The cardiologist said that it was something that we should keep an eye on. Mike however, knew nothing about it because he refused to return my phone calls. Eventually, I stopped calling him.
Devastated after finding out that Kaden and I had no insurance, I picked up my phone and tried to call my dad. After several attempts, I wasn't able to get in touch with dad, Alice or Jasper. I was completely distraught and desperately needed to talk to someone – anyone. Before I knew what my fingers were doing, I realized that I could hear Edward's tired voice projecting through my phone.
"Bella?"
I breathed a deep sigh of relief at hearing the sound of his sweet voice.
"Bella? Are you there? Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, I'm here," I sniffled.
"Why are you crying, beautiful?" Edward asked, his voice full of concern.
I managed to tell him everything, how I was getting sick and made a doctor's appointment and then finding out about the insurance. He understood completely how stressed out I was about it because even Edward knew about Kaden's heart murmur.
"Bella, I don't want you to stress out about all this, okay? If you're already feeling sick, I don't want you to get worse. Get some rest and try not to worry. I will see what I can do to help you, okay beautiful?"
My heart melted a little when he called me beautiful. It didn't slip my mind that he'd called me that twice over the course of our conversation. However, my intention for calling him wasn't to get him to feel sorry for me or to get him to help me in any way – I just wanted to vent about it. My situation was something that I needed to figure out on my own. Somewhere, deep down I knew that but when I was on the phone with Edward his words made a lot of sense. I didn't need to feel worse than I already was. I could feel that my equilibrium was off because of the oncoming ear infection and I needed to rest.
Thankfully, my dad was picking Kaden up from school that afternoon and was planning on spending the afternoon with him at the park. I'd use the time to go to the doctor and fill any prescriptions I was given.
"Thank you, Edward."
"No need to thank me, Bella. It's my pleasure. Try to get some rest okay? I'll check in on you later."
"Okay," I murmured. "Edward?"
"Yeah?" He yawned.
"I miss you."
"I miss you too, beautiful. Get some rest."
I ended the call and collapsed on my sofa in exhaustion.
A few hours later and nearly four hundred dollars poorer, I entered my condo. My ear was hurting worse and I couldn't wait to make a cup of hot tea, take my antibiotics and crawl into bed. I finally managed to get in touch with dad and let him know that I was going home to rest and see if he would mind watching Kaden.
"Bells … I wish you'd called earlier. I could have picked him up and taken him to school this morning. If you've got an ear infection you won't be much good to him until it goes away. I remember the awful ones you had as a kid. You don't want to wake up screaming in pain in the middle of the night and wake Little Man up. I'll come over and bring you some dinner and pick up some clothes for Little Man and he can stay with me tonight. We need some time together anyway."
I thanked my dad profusely and ended the call.
I vaguely remember dad and Kaden coming in that night. I heard Koda bark and that's what clued me in that they were there. Well, that and the fact that Kaden came running into my bed room.
"Mommy, Mommy!" He screamed.
"Hey, Little Bear," I squeaked out, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.
"Papa say you sick. We bringed you some soup."
I smiled and took his little hand and let him lead me into the living room. I found my dad in the kitchen reheating some soup in the microwave.
"Sorry we woke you, Bells. I thought you'd want something on your stomach if you're taking meds."
"Thanks, Dad. While that's heating up, let me get some things together for Kaden."
Before too long, I'd managed to eat an entire bowl of soup and sent them on their way. I sat down on the couch and tried to watch TV, but the meds made me sleepy so I plodded my way down the short hallway and back to my comfy bed. I know I hadn't been asleep very long when the shrill ring of my phone woke me up. I blindly grabbed for the offending device on my nightstand and winced when I saw it was Edward calling. I missed him immensely – more than I wanted to admit but at that moment he was one of the last people I wanted to talk to because he'd only worry about how I was feeling. My subconscious must have wanted to hear his smooth voice because I ended up answering anyway.
"Bella?"
"Mmmhmm …."
"Did I wake you, beautiful?"
"Yeah … but that's okay. God, Edward … what time is it there?
"It's just after one … we're on a lunch break. How are you feeling?"
"Horrible …." I murmured. "I went to the doctor but it's worse now than it was this morning."
I could hear Edward sigh on the other end of the line.
"Where's Kaden?"
"With my dad. He picked him up from school and kept him all afternoon and then he came over with him a little while ago to get some of his things. He'll take Kaden to school tomorrow."
"Have you eaten anything?"
What was this? Twenty questions?
"Yeah, Dad brought me some soup. Please don't worry about me, Edward. I'll be good as new in a couple of days."
"Yeah, but in the meantime, who's going to take care of you, Bella?
"I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself."
"Bella …" Edward chastised. "You're sick … you should at least have someone there if you need something. What if you get dizzy and fall? What if you hit your head?"
So many scenarios must have been running wild in Edward's head. The panic was clear in his voice.
"Edward," I said tiredly. "I'll be fine. I promise to be overly cautious if that makes you feel better."
"No, it doesn't, Bella. I'd feel much better if you had someone there with you."
"I don't have that option, Edward. My dad has his hands full with Kaden, Alice is busy with work and now … well, I can't burden her now."
"Bella, Alice is pregnant – not an invalid." Edward chuckled.
"I know she's not. If I'm not better in a couple of days, I'll call her, okay?" I conceded.
I needed to ease his worries, or I had a feeling that he'd hound me until I gave in and I wasn't going to let that happen.
"She already knows you're sick, Bella. Jasper told her."
Of course, because Edward told Jazz after I talked to him this morning. I could feel my eyes drooping shut once again and I apologized to Edward for needing to cut our call short. Even though he spent the majority of it chastising me for not having anyone to keep me company – it was comforting to hear his velvety voice. He promised that he'd call and check on me the next day and I fell into a peaceful sleep.
When I woke the next morning I felt worse than I did the day before. My throat hurt, my chest ached and from out of nowhere I seemed to have caught the most awful cough. Dad came by after he dropped Kaden off at school and he insisted that I go back to the doctor since I'd only been prescribed ear drops and an antibiotic for my ear infection the day before.
"You don't want to get pneumonia, Bells," He warned. "And you sure as shit don't want to give whatever this is to Little Man, so until you're feeling better, I'll keep him with me."
I sat up to argue with him, but it only got me coughing worse – to the point I was having problems breathing. I lay down again after the coughing fit subsided and nodded helplessly. He promised that he'd bring Kaden by to see me which made the thought of him being away a little easier.
Dad called and made an appointment for me with the doctor. Lucky for me, they were able to work me in if I came in right away. I dressed and Dad offered to take me. After a chest X-ray and an ultrasound of my sinuses, the doctor told me not only did I have a sinus infection that more than likely stemmed from my ear infection but I had pneumonia in my left lung.
"It's only about the size of a quarter but enough to be worried about," The doctor explained. "We'll put you on a strong antibiotic and that paired with a lot of rest – you should be better in no time."
Dad drove me to the pharmacy and waited patiently with me while my prescriptions were filled. I felt so tired – I wanted to go home and collapse into my bed and sleep for a week. As we were waiting – my phone rang and once again I cringed when I saw the caller ID and realized it was Edward.
"Shouldn't you be sleeping?" I croaked into the phone.
"Oh, Bella … you sound awful."
"I feel awful. I feel worse today than I did yesterday," I admitted.
I hated telling him that because I knew what he'd say about it but I didn't want to lie to him and to be honest, it felt good to whine a little.
"You should go back to the doctor, beautiful. We don't want you to get pneumonia."
"Too late," I mumbled.
"What?"
"Too late," I said again a little louder. "My dad took me back to the doctor this morning and I have pneumonia and a sinus infection which is making my ear infection worse."
"Jesus … fuck. How did you get pneumonia, Bella?"
I told him what I'd told the doctor – it was probably a wicked combination of things. The weather had been unusually cold and with the move, I'd been cleaning a lot. I scrubbed down the entire condo before we moved in. I know that the land lady had it cleaned professionally but that's not the same as cleaning it yourself and I sometimes tended to be a little OCD with cleaning. Since the chemicals were so strong, I'd left the windows open ….
Edward sighed audibly and I could picture him running his long fingers through his hair and pinching the bridge of his nose.
The pharmacist called my name and I explained to Edward that my prescriptions were ready and that I'd call him back when I got home.
My phone call to Edward never happened. It wasn't because I didn't want it to, but I was exhausted when I got home so I crawled into bed and passed out.
I woke in a coughing fit a few hours later and glanced at my phone only to realize that I'd missed a couple calls and several texts from Edward.
Bella … I hope the reason you didn't call is because you went straight to bed. Text me later, please? – E
Bella … I don't want to bother you if you're resting but I'm worried about you. Hope you're okay. – E
I hated the thought that Edward was so worried about me and while I had a hard time putting two thoughts together in my weary state, I decided that it would be better to text him back and attempt to assuage his fears.
I'm okay. Just tired. Went to bed after doctor. Going back to bed. Will text u later. – B
It wasn't long after I texted Edward that my phone rang and I rolled my eyes thinking that it was him but when I looked at the caller ID, I saw that it was Alice calling.
"Hey, Alice," I croaked.
"Hey, Girl. God, you sound awful. Jazzy said you were sick but I thought it was just an ear infection."
"Uh uhh. I have pneumonia and a sinus infection too."
"Oh jeez, you poor thing! I'd love to come by and bring you some soup or something but Jazzy's afraid that I'll get sick too and with the baby …."
"It's okay, Ali. I get it and I don't want you to get sick. You need to stay healthy and take care of that baby."
"I feel so bad knowing how awful you sound," Alice said sadly.
"It's okay, I'll be fine."
She promised that she would call me later to check in on me and we ended our call. I sat the phone on the bedside table and fell asleep not long after.
My room was completely dark when I woke up again. I reached around, trying to find a pillow to muffle the banging in my head. Once I covered my head, the banging kept on. Frustrated, I finally sat up in bed and realized that the banging noise was coming from the living room. I rose from the bed and dizzily made my way to the front door.
"All right … I'm coming," I croaked. "Just stop the banging."
I swung open the door and realized I was face to face with Esme Cullen and Emmett.
A/N: So poor Bella is sick and Edward feels so helpless. Things are rough for them all around. Thankfully Mama Esme has arrived! =D
Thank you again for all the lovely reviews – I can't express how much they mean to me. I feel like a slacker not having enough time to reply to them because I really want to – again there just aren't enough hours in the day and with the holidays upon us …. Y'all know how it is ;)