Change 2: Romano has pizza as his comfort food whenever he feels unappreciated :'(
"Your meal, sir."
England thanked the waitress and took another gulp from his glass of beer. He was feeling the buzz of alcohol already. Not soon enough, in his opinion. Today had been a disaster. He had gone to America's room straight after the meeting (only because the git wouldn't stop texting him, not because he wanted to or anything!) and tried to take care of his former colony.
Key word being try.
One thing he really wished America had grown out of was his stubborn nature. He refused to take any of the few medicines available, he was constantly complaining that there were too many or too few blankets, and any food or tea England made wasn't even looked at! He tried to call Canada throughout the afternoon, but apparently he was with France sightseeing around Tokyo.
It took about five hours of dealing with the Yank and a few threatening text messages to France before Canada agreed to take over babysitting duties. By then England was long overdue for a drink.
Smiling at the waitress when she refilled his cup, England decided to forget America for the night.
Prussia smirked at England from the other side of the cafe, where he was sitting with Spain and Romano. Spain had hold of Hungary's notebook, and was mumbling to himself at the contents. Romano was next to him, sipping his glass of wine and occasionally glaring over at the 'Loner tea bastard.'
"I knew those two were meant to be."
Prussia turned to Spain, who had finished reading the book and was now grinning over at England. Fortunately, the blond was turned away from them and too preoccupied with his meal to notice.
"They're almost as bad as you and little Romano there," observed Prussia.
"What about me?" questioned Romano, who had been ignoring the other two the whole time.
"Come on, it's obvious why you're really here," laughed Prussia.
"I told you, I'm making sure you don't destroy the place like Spain did the last time you two and the French bastard went for a drink! I'm not bailing you bastards out again!"
"Aww, Roma~ I said I was sorry..." whined Spain, wrapping his arms round the hot tempered nation. Romano blushed and attempted half heartedly to push him away.
Prussia rolled his eyes and smirked at Romano, "Yeah, right. You know, there's nothing wrong with wanting to get it on with a hottie like him, kid."
"I DO NOT WANT TO FUCK SPAIN, YOU POTATO DICKHEAD!" shouted Romano, standing up and managing to push Spain off.
There was silence for a few moments as everybody in the cafe turned to the three at the back, including England. Spain quickly made apologizing motions at the crowd, and slowly they returned to their food, with a few wary glances at Romano. Fuck a country? He must be really drunk.
Eventually Romano managed to calm down, and sat back in his seat, huffing. Spain rubbed circles on his back to lower his temper and Prussia grinned at his success. Maybe he should add these two idiots in as well...
"Hey, Prussia, you said you were going to write more in, right?" asked Spain, motioning at the book. He lowered his voice a little now that England was aware of them, but the smile on his face showed he was still going through with it.
Prussia nodded. "Yeah, we're gonna write the long awaited sex between those two!"
"Between who?" interjected Romano, now paying more attention to the conversation. Spain handed him the book, letting him read what was already there. Thankfully for the now impatient Prussia, Romano was a faster reader than Spain and soon handed the book back. "Like those two are ever going to see it."
Yeah, you would know, thought Prussia. "It would be awesome if they did."
"Well, even if they did, it's not like they would go at it the first night. They need at least a date or something," argued Romano, being something of a romanticist despite appearances.
"Uh, Roma, it's Inglaterra. He wouldn't know romance if it hit him in the face with a ripe tomato," answered Spain, looking over at the Brit with a slight sneer.
"W-Well then, what about the hamburger bastard?" replied Romano, "He's too prudish to go with something like that on the first night!"
"England would get him drunk, then."
Prussia laughed loudly at Spain's response, "That's awesome! I'm so writing that in! Have you got a pen?"
Spain shrugged, shaking his head. Of course, preparing in advance wasn't one of his strong points, after all. Romano sighed at his former caretaker, and pulled out a pen from his jacket. Prussia grabbed it and started writing.
"Would England get America really drunk or buzzed?" asked Prussia to no-one in particular.
"Drunk," immediately answered Spain. Romano huffed and peered over to see what the albino was writing.
"There are other English adjectives instead of 'awesome'," he sneered. Prussia gave Romano the finger and focused on his piece. Romano scowled, which gave Spain an excuse to pull him back to his seat and wrap an arm round him. Romano's scowl deepened, but Spain just held tighter and cooed whenever the short tempered nation attempted to struggle.
Prussia ignored them, leaving the two lovebirds to bicker with each other. Yeah, he was definitely gonna add these two in later. But first, he needed to write him and Birdie in! Sure, they may not be going out yet, but there was no way he'd be turned down! He was too awesome for that!
He started to rush a little on America's and England's scene due to his anticipation. That scene would be good anyway, but Hungary wouldn't mind once she saw the awesomeness that he and Birdie was!
"You look so happy, Prussia," Spain smiled, still holding onto Romano's waist; he had long given up trying to pull out of Spain's grip.
"What?" Prussia turned to Spain, surprised, "Well... because I'm awesome, that's why!"
Spain laughed in his usual carefree manner and moved off Romano to get to Prussia's side. Prussia moved away instinctively, unwilling to let Spain read his tale of himself and Canada. Not that he was shy or sensitive about the topic or anything! Just... Spain wasn't awesome enough to be worthy of seeing! Yeah, that was it!
Unfortunately, Spain's curiosity was thoroughly peaked. Edging round the table on his chair, Spain moved closer to Prussia. The albino moved away again in response, clutching the book to his chest.
"Come on, let me see~" moaned Spain, reaching out for the book. Oh shit, he was trying to pull the puppy eyes trick again. Like hell that would work on Prussia again!
Unfortunately, it seemed to work on the third occupant at the table. Prussia had moved his chair much closer to Romano, so the Southern Italian was able to get a good grip on the book in Prussia's hands. He wrenched it out of Prussia's grasp, smirking at Prussia's stunned expression.
His victory didn't last long. "Give that back, you little brat!" yelled Prussia, lunging for the book. He managed to grab one end of the book, and pulled for all it was worth. Romano yelped at the enraged German, and quickly let go. However, that made the book fly out of Prussia's grasp and slide along the floor of the cafe.
Landing right at England's foot.
...
"Oh fuck," muttered Romano.
England picked up the notebook that had appeared under his table with vague interest. Where had this come from? He remembered seeing Hungary and Japan using a notebook like this during the meeting, but they weren't around, so that couldn't be it. He looked around for the owner, intending to do as a gentleman would and return the strange notebook.
Considering that no-one came over to claim ownership, England had to guess it belonged to the three other countries sitting on the other side of the cafe. Romano looked like he wanted nothing to do with the other two, Spain seemed to be comforting Prussia about something and Prussia... England bit back a laugh at the other nation's face. He had never seen the Kraut so red and embarrassed in his life! Now he just had to see what was in the notebook if it was so embarrassing!
...
Wait... what? Th-This was...
England rested his head on the table, clearly frustrated. What was with him today?!
This was about him? When did he rest his head here? Was this another one of Prussia's stupid diaries? If so, why was it in past tense?
Today, he couldn't keep his focus off the empty chair beside him. That is, the one America was meant to sit his fat arse on.
No, wait, this was about the meeting. So... Spain or Romano's then? Doubtful... Actually, it was probably Hungary's and Prussia had stolen it to piss her off.
He would return it to her tomorrow then. But since this was clearly about him, he felt he had a right to read it before he did so.
"Rise and shine, Angleterre!" laughed France, grabbing the Brit's chair and pulling it back.
Oh yes. He had almost forgotten about that. It was a shame France wasn't with his friends for once; England very much wanted to return the favour concerning his newly formed bruise.
America. For reasons he didn't quite know (or didn't want to admit to himself), he felt the need to see the blue-eyed nation.
No, he did not feel the need to do shit for America. He looked after America because the wanker wouldn't leave him alone. It was now pretty clear that this was Hungary's book, considering the... romantic undertones to this 'story.' If it was anyone else who was writing this he would've been worried, but she had been rattling on about him and France of all people just yesterday. It was probably safer to leave her to her weird fantasies.
But yeah, okay, maybe she sort of had a point about America. Just a little one.
...Shut up.
For some reason, after this the writing became messier and looked more rushed. Apparently someone else had been filling this in.
But first, he went to the shop and got some awesome German beer to give to Amerika-ca. Then he changed his mind and got some gross unawesome vodka for him because it's really strong. But he still bought the German beer because it tastes way awesomer than his English piss ale.
What?! Bullocks! Prussia (it was obviously him) never complained when he got some good quality ale!
After he bought the alcohol England ran up to America's room-
Wasn't he supposed to not know where America's room was yet?
-and shouted "Step aside, Canada, I need to do something with America here!"
"Okay," replied Canada. "I'll go to the awesome Prussia's room then. I'm feeling kinda horny anyway."
Oh for fucks sake! England glared over at the now empty table where Prussia had sat (those three didn't waste time leaving). He did not need that image of his former colony with goddamn Prussia of all people!
Canada left to go to Prussia's room. We'll get to that later ;)
Oh God no.
England waited till the awesome Birdie left before turning to America with a grin. "Here, I got some unawesome vodka for your cold~" America drank it, since he always falls for stuff like that. After two bottles America was very, very drunk.
One day England was going to give Prussia a poorly written story in German, just to show how much it hurts to read something so bad.
Now that America couldn't complain, England ripped off his shirt and trousers. America realised what he was doing and did the same to the limey. Usually America would act all unawesome and prudish, but now he was drunk he didn't mind fucking his crush so early.
Wh-What?! What the hell was this?! Sure, he liked America a little, but getting him drunk just to fuck him? He would never do something like! Did... Did Prussia really think that of him? It wasn't as if they had the same sort of rivalry as he did with France or Sp-
Spain. It had to be. Bloody bastard.
England took out the lube he keeps with him all the time since he's perverted like that, and tried to prepare America. However, since he's a total fairy he couldn't figure out how to do it, so America flipped him over and took the lube from unawesome England.
England's hands twitched as he turned the page. If only Prussia and his unharmed neck was here right now...
America leaned down-
Leant, Prussia.
-to kiss England. England moaned and returned the kiss, even though America was drunk on vodka and tasted really unawesome. America started to prepare him although he's probably shit at foreplay coz he's too impatient. England didn't mind, though, as he was finally with the guy he's loved since WW1. Also, he's a total masochist. He loved the punishments I the awesome Prussia gave him for running off unawesomely during the War of Austrian Succession...
Meanwhile, in Prussia's room-
That was it. England slammed the book shut furiously. That fucking Kraut! What the fuck was wrong with him?! More importantly, how the fuck did he know about his feelings for America?! England couldn't remember writing anything down... And he hadn't been that obvious... Had he?
England glared at the book, as if it was the cause of all his problems. He definitely couldn't give it back to Hungary now, and she would notice if he ripped out Prussia's piece since part of it was on the same sheet as hers.
Maybe he should keep hold of it for now and throw it away later... Actually, since he was definitely getting pissed later and most likely someone would pick him up, it was probably better to get rid of the thing now.
...Well, there was that spell he had wanted to try for a while.
England stood and muttered the incantation Norway had taught him under his breath, ignoring the stares from other customers close enough to hear. According to Norway, this spell was meant to keep the book constantly lost. If anyone saw it, it would change places once the person looked away.
However, due to having more than a few drinks in his system, England was having a harder time than usual remembering the words to this chant. It also didn't help that this was the first time he had ever used this spell.
Once England finished his spell, the book vibrated a little on the table, then stilled. If this had worked, if England looked away and back again...
Yes! The book was gone! England grinned at his handiwork.
Now, time to get pissed. If anything, it would at least prevent unwanted reactions from the images in his head.
...Phew. This chapter's longer than my drama essays.
I know you can say 'leaned,' but over here it's considered an Americanism.
I really enjoyed writing this chapter. Hey, if anyone is in the position to critique English fanfiction, it would be Iggy himself XD Now I wish he was my Beta.