Author's Note: I think I have to explain something here…remember how Gale told Peeta how Katniss would decide who she would stay with? Well this is pre-amble to that….you'll get it and if not PM me

Also: most of this chapter was typed on my iPod waaaayyyy before I was even thinking of writing PR…my muse is evil

Thanks go to my reviewers: EWD, JB and DAK…feeling much better guys thnx :)

Chapter 65

The Rebuttal

They leave me alone, for the most part I think they know I'm un-co-operative, because probably in their minds I think I'm better than them.

I'm not better I'm just moral, it's the only thing I have left. My dignity and my morals, I have no family except that I have adopted into my circle, no one that shares my eyes or part of my genetic code, I'm alone.

It's a couple weeks and finally we hear thru the grapevine that district Three and Eleven are finally free of the Capitol rule. We just have district Two left.

District Two, Maverick's home.

Gale has been keeping his distance, and I don't know why.

I really don't know. I've been hanging with Maverick a lot because after my outburst I haven't wanted him out of my sight. I'm worried if I do they might do something to him like they did to Katniss' prep team.

Katniss recovers enough and demands to be brought to district Two, partly I think to keep her distance from Peeta. I don't know if gale and I are oon her blacklist. I do know how she feels, I still feel my skin crawn when I think of my fifteenth birthday. Four years is not long enough I guess. She's gone for the better part of the week.

My communicator goes off for another meeting, they are as infrequent as propos shoots now, since Katniss doesn't want to be near anyone right now. Gale is there, sitting beside Boggs and acting aloof. I know I've been paying more attention to Mav but I have reason to worry.

There is murmuring from every corner today.

"If we could all settle?" Coin says matter-of-factly, she sends me an icy glare, full of distaste. She notices how Gale and I are not sitting together, how I am sticking close to Maverick.

Maverick let's go of my hand as the folders are opened, a map of district Two, notable people of the district, Maverick is visibly tense. I know he misses his parents, more than I miss mine. He has even said sometimes he wishes his dad was here because he was level headed and was calm in a crisis whereas he's emotional like his mother. I miss them too; I miss writing to them and them saying how proud they were of me. We share identical expressions. Worry predominant.

"How is the securing of district Two coming along?" Coin looks at Boggs

"Commander Lyme and I are working on it" Boggs says, "commander Hawthorne is going there this afternoon, Everdeen is already stationed there"

"Perhaps we should send the Sparrow in too Boggs" Coin looks at me, "yes, you will accompany Hawthorne and join Everdeen, as consult, don't think you'll need to suit up"

Maverick takes my hand again under the table

"Fine" I take her challenge replying sharply

"Ari" Maverick says curbing my temper

"No she's right I should go, then if it goes wrong she can blame me" I stare down Coin, "this afternoon then" I get up

"I didn't dismiss you soldier Crane" Coin says, just saying my real last name, it spurs me on.

"If I'm going into the field again after almost getting blown up I am going to say my goodbyes" I say and leave followed closely by Maverick.

"Ari" he calls to me

"No Mav I'm done! She wants me to get killed so be it" I snap, I'm angry and hurt, it hasn't been a stellar couple days to say the least.

He grabs my hand and it stalls me, I can't be angry at Maverick, "she's just goading you, she doesn't like being denied."

I turn around, oh how I keep seeing him from five years ago telling me he would be fine, "I just don't understand why she hates me so much"

Maverick laughs, "because you're humane Ariana" he pulls me into a hug, "you get people to listen not with well placed words like the Peeta, but by being there when things are at their worst and not turning away when it gets hard."

"I want this war over" I mutter into his shoulder

"It will be" he says, it helps a small bit, this simple reassurance.

I hear someone clear their throat and Maverick let's go, "take good care of her Hawthorne"

"I will Letorch" he says, there is tension between us, I wish I could apologize to Gale but what do I apologize for?

"I should get ready" I say softly

"Be careful twerp" Maverick says and kisses the back of my hand before he wheels around and catches up with Boggs and Beetee

Gale comes beside me, "so" he says but he lets it hang.

"So" I say in reply

"Can we talk?" he looks at me and I nod

We find an empty room, I sit on the table and he paces in front of me, "okay look I don't know what I did wrong but I miss what we had in district Twelve" he says, "as soon as I told you" he pauses, I can tell he is upset I haven't said it back, he sighs, "you've been spending more and more time either alone in command or with him since I recovered, I just-"

"Gale"

"what does he have that I don't?"

"Gale it's not like that at all!"

"Then what is it like Ariana? I thought we had something. I said I loved you!"

"I know!" god he is looking at me deeply again, I've hurt him, I motion him to come and sit beside me I take his hand in mine, "you remember the games I was in? I mean you saw them when you were little, but" I sigh "I lost Farrow, Celena, Archie, then Maverick and my brother. Maverick was like you are to Posy, a big brother. I stepped in it I am sure with Coin and she will very easily try and hurt people I care about, she won't touch you because Katniss wants you around, but Maverick only has me right now. I care for him and he cares for me but it's not romantic love, but it is love, like how I love Peeta and want him healthy and happy with Katniss. I just…I don't know how…I mean-"

He takes his hand away, "you love Peeta?"

"Like the little brother I never had" I reply urgently, "Gale...I care about you in such a different way then them"

"But you don't love me" he looks at me confused

"I don't know, I've never been in love before" I blush, finally saying the thing I was having trouble putting into words, it's both freeing and terrifying in one shot.

He looks even more confused, "how is that?"

I shrug, "the life of a young victor is very lonely especially when you turn spy for the rebellion" I reply deadpanned, the joke is lost on him because I can see the gears working in his head.

He paces again trying to figure me, he then realizes something, "okay let's try something, close your eyes"

I look at him guarded, he knows this is a lot to ask someone with trust issues doesn't he?

"It will be okay trust me" he stands in front of me, those famous last words, but he is looking at me with such urgency and reassurance that I do so…
I close my eyes

I don't hear anything, "Gale I don't like this game of yours"

Nothing

"Gale come on can I open them?"

Nothing

I open my eyes and he is gone, I forgot that he can move like I can, without sound. "not funny Gale!" I say thinking he's hiding, "Gale? Gale!" I think I hurt him, or maybe something has happened I was so lost in my own mind. I start to panic, but instead of getting frantic I cover my face and cry softly. I was being honest and I've lost him because I couldn't say it even when it mattered.

It's a few moments but my hands are brought away from my face gently, coaxing them away by rough weather beaten ones.

Gale looks at me his face is pain streaked like mine, "sorry had to understand it"

I cry and he wraps me in his arms, "I'm sorry Ari, don't hate me okay?"

"Don't do that again!" I hit his chest with a fist, "please I can't take that again", it was cruel! Especially since I've been a wreck lately.

"I won't I promise" he whispers in my hair, "how did you feel?" he asks softly

"Betrayed, broken, abandoned, distraught, like I hurt you and you hated me, or that s-something happened to you" I speak into his shirt, "I've felt like that a lot"

"Thought that I wouldn't come back?" he asks

I nod into his chest.

"I will always come back" he says, "I promise you okay I will never abandoned you ever" he lifts my tear streaked face and kisses me on the lips, "no more hiding how we feel okay?"

I nod to him

"I love you" he whispers

"I love you too" I say softly in return

We head down to deployment after I calm down and don't look like I've been crying, Boggs is waiting for us as they load weapons on the ship. I get a feeling in the pit of my stomach that Gale mirrors in his expression.

"what's wrong?" I ask him.

"Just got a bad vibe" Gale replies shrugging it off, he turns to me, "what do we know on Two?"

"Quarry and military station for Panem, Maverick was from there along with Cato" I reply

"Damn talk about night and day" he chuckles

"Cato was career since he was reaping age, Mav wasn't, plus Mav grew up poor whereas Cato was from wealthier stock" I explain, "it's not just whoyou are but how you grew up, I was a townie and I am well-"

"You're perfect" Gale interrupts and I blush furiously

"If you two lovebirds would hurry up" Boggs teases

"We aren't" I look at Gale who is smirking at me, "I mean we are but we aren't y'know"

"Yeah yeah Crane" Boggs jokes as we board

Ken and his strike team are with us on this project and I smirk at him, Gale takes my hand and gives it a kiss on the inside of my wrist as he heads off to get his gear on. I have mine under the seat, nothing much, bullet proof vest, guns and a riot helmet.

Gale returns with a combat bow, quiver of arrows and a gun as well as body armor. I haven't put mine on, mind I am here as consult I don't plan on going in. I do put sunglasses on because as I stare out the window the sunlight is right in my face.

"Alright Rambo" I look at him, I had to say that reference. I saw that film in the Capitol I found it mildly entertaining, and Gale coming out in that attire…he just needs a red band across his forehead

"Who?" Gale asks and Ken looks confused as well

"Nothing, I'll tell you about it later" I reply

Getting to district Two wasn't as hard as I had thought but Boggs explains that they have the majority taken over, there is just a mountain stronghold they have yet to breech. He calls it 'the nut', it's a mountain with trams going up to it and from it. Commander Lyme welcomes us in a very curt mannor.

She glances us and ushers us into a tent to go over schematics, Katniss is already there. I'm staring at this blueprint which shows both topographical , internal and external shots of 'the nut'. Trams got up to the strong hold from three points, there is an underground exit but some areas are unstable, it could close off if something went wrong.

"We could block their exits it's unstable enough to create landslides to seal the openings" Gale advises.

'That would be the wrong thing' I think to myself.

"We'll be killing innocent people too Gale!" Katniss points out, I can tell she has issues with underground scenarios, she's right though, it would cause panic, and people could get hurt needlessly.

"Bottle neck" I say realizing there is a better method

Gale looks at me as well as Boggs, and Lyme.

"We can't block all the exits but we can control the flow of people if all but one is blocked", I say this not for the sake of placating Katniss but because Maverick's parents haven't been identified and I promised myself I would find them and bring them home to him.

"That should work" Ken looks at the topographic map, "controlled explosions here and here should take care of the east and west exits so only the southern one is able to be used" he gets his men on this as Lyme nods to Boggs who orders the attack.

Gale sees I have concern in my eyes, "hey you okay Ari?"

"Mavericks parents are somewhere they don't even know he is alive" I tell him

"We'll find them" Gale reassures as Katniss goes to rally the troops

We hear the explosions then a phone rings and heated words are exchanged between Boggs and the peacekeeper commander who is in the 'nut'.

When finally done he slams the phone down.

"They won't release any hostages unless we put down arms" Boggs snarls, "arrogant sonafabitch"

"Then we do it" Katniss says

"Are you insane?!" Gale looks at his friend, "we do that then what stops them from shooting us down?"

"No she has a point" I say unholstering my guns and placing them on the ground, "we don't need bloodshed, we need peace Gale"

Katniss seems pleased with someone being on her side and soon Ken is agreeing, we all disarm ourselves. Boggs makes the call to confirm, as well as Lyme.

The first trolley is sent down and I watch the hostages come out, finally spotting the Letorches as they file out. As they sit with the others I make to go to them when I hear the click of a gun being armed.

A peacekeeper disembarks, he looks nervous and Ken races to get his gun from the pile as they stand off.

"Easy!" I race between them, the peacekeeper is young, no older than Gale and I.

Katniss comes over too and tries to reason with the guy but it seems her mere presence is enough to unhinged him.

The next few moments are chaotic and I barely remember my feet propelling me to tackle Mr. Letorch as the guns start firing. I remember a searing pain go thru my back and chest then I hit my head and black out.

I think I imagine it but…I think…I hear Gale call to me...