Author's Note:
Hi to all of you!
Thanks to my super-fast beta shoppe69, you receive another chapter of blood-slave within one week!
I hope you like it! Please let me know.
Giuna
Chapter 12
After preparing breakfast, Damon strolled back towards the bedroom and stopped in the motion when he reached the doorframe. Elena stood in front of the full-length mirror, clad only in some sexy looking black lingerie, skeptically staring at her reflection. She slightly touched her stomach, the waistband of her thong and all the way up to her breasts. Exhaling sharply, she shook her head and contorted her face into a mask of reluctance. Moving her hand behind her back, she unclasped the black lace bra and turned around to grab a more casual looking undergarment. Raising her eyes, she winced in shock.
"Jeez, Damon! You scared me!" She fought for air.
"You don't say," he sounded surprised, but she knew he only faked it.
"How long have you been there?" she wanted to know, pressing her unclasped bra against her breasts.
"Long enough, I guess," he pointed out and scrutinized her from head to toe, registering the insecure way she stood there. She looked kind of lost.
"I just wanted… I thought I should…," Elena stuttered at a loss for words.
"Shsh," Damon hushed her, walking over to her.
"You're beautiful, you know that, right?" he asked and took her wrists in his hands, pulling them away from their cramped position. "With or without sexy lingerie," he assured her when the bra dropped to the floor. Elena's cheeks flushed crimson red, as if he had never seen her naked before.
Damon frowned, not able to figure her out. Noticing his questioning look she took a deep breath. "Actually, I wanted to surprise you with these," she waved down her body, pointing at the thong and the almost forgotten bra on the floor. "But…, I'm not sure, it just didn't feel right," she admitted and asked herself silently if she would ever be able to erase the memories of her past. Hell, she just wanted to give the man she loved a treat!
"That is really sweet, honey, but like I said, you can wear whatever you want. For me you are beautiful and sexy no matter what. The important thing is that you feel comfortable. When you feel comfortable, you're able to let go and that is what turns me on like nothing else, okay?" Damon held her hands up against his mouth, kissing them tenderly before he let go of her, watching the flush on her cheeks vanishing. Elena looked down to the floor, gathering her composure before she raised her eyes again and peered at him through her thick black lashes.
"I don't know what to say, Damon. Thank you, for being so patient with me," she said shyly.
"I love you, Elena. And this love isn't bound to any conditions. You don't have to thank me for something you can take for granted. And now come on, breakfast is ready," he informed her, caressing her cheek gently.
Elena frowned when Damon turned around, quite amazed about his serene statement. She dressed herself quickly, following Damon with her eyes as he left the room and headed for the kitchen. She didn't understand herself. On the one hand, she was able to sleep with him, to even french him, but on the other hand she wasn't able to wear some hot lingerie - hello?
She was almost sure that it had something to do with the fact that Damon had replaced the fear she once felt with safety, devotion and tenderness. There was simply no room left for horrible memories when they slept together because her body and soul were full of love for him. Wearing flimsies, though, re-evoked the humiliation she had forcefully buried inside her because she couldn't handle it.
Silently she had hoped that she would be able to process her past without a therapist. Now, she wasn't so sure about it anymore. Seeing herself in the mirror had instantly thrown her back in time. And now it seemed impossible to shake off the memory of Mason ripping off her clothes, dressing her in slutty underwear and forcing her to lap dance for him while he pleased himself.
Fully dressed, she slowly walked into the kitchen and found Damon making her coffee with steamed milk. The heavenly scent of the coffee and the bountiful table soothed her upset mind and she accomplished to relax a little bit.
Watching Damon completing his work, she sat down.
"That looks delicious, Damon, as always," she complimented him the moment he turned to face her, passing her the coffee.
"Don't make me blush, honey," he grinned at her and sat down across from her, watching Elena intensely as she sugared her coffee. Even though she seemed recollected, he knew that she just tried to play down her momentary state of mind. Although the last few weeks had gone by without any serious flashbacks, and Damon had hoped that she had made some progress on her own, the situation in the bedroom had shown him once more that she was far away from recovery. She needed help. Badly!
"Mmmm," she moaned, sipping at her coffee and rested her back against the chair.
"Are you okay?" Damon asked carefully. It wasn't his intention to ruin her mood.
"Just so-so," she answered quietly and stared at the table, her appetite suddenly vanished.
"That's what I figured," he stated and searched her eyes, but she wouldn't look at him.
"Elena, please look at me?" he pleaded and reached for her hand, but stopped abruptly when his cell phone started to ring.
Damon sighed and got up, "Sorry, honey," he excused himself and went into the living room, reaching for the phone he had put on the coffee table. Looking at the display, he started to smirk.
"Hey, buddy. What's up?" he greeted Alaric on the other end of the line.
"Damon, it's good to hear you, man. It's been a while!" Alaric said excited.
"That's true, Ric. How's it going?" Damon wanted to know and slumped into the couch.
"Actually, everything is going nicely. Jenna is back!" Alaric informed him euphorically and Damon could literally hear the smile on his face.
"Man, I'm really happy for you. How long has she been on the West Coast? Four years?" "Exactly! You have no idea how glad I am that she is back for good," Alaric pointed out in relief and sighed.
"I can imagine," Damon responded. "Has she finished her studies, now?"
"Yes, she passed all her exams. The only decision she has to make is whether to open her own practice or to affiliate with a clinic," Alaric explained proudly.
"Sounds good, Ric. Tell me, what exactly was she studying again?" Damon asked, remembering that Jenna had studied to get a doctoral degree, but he couldn't recall her major.
"She is a psychologist, specialized on trauma management," Alaric told him, quite amused that Damon couldn't memorize it.
"You don't say," Damon murmured and mused about the fortunate coincidence. Maybe Elena would be able to talk to Jenna. At least, it was worth the try.
"Yes, for the nth time," Alaric chuckled but wasn't annoyed at all. He knew his best mate all too well. "The reason I call, Damon, Jenna and I would like to invite the two of you for dinner tonight. Think you can make it? Jenna wants to celebrate her return and her degree. Actually, she is quite excited to get to know the girl who managed to domesticate the infamous Damon Salvatore," Alaric teased.
"Ha, ha, I see!" Damon laughed, "No, seriously, Ric, did you tell her about the special blood connection between Elena and me?"
"No, I didn't, should I? Hoping it saves your bad-boy image?" Alaric giggled into the phone.
"Somebody is in a pretty good mood, huh? Actually, I would prefer that she knows, so please tell her. But, Ric? Keep the details about Elena's past to yourself, okay?"
"Will do. Means you're coming?"
"Wait a sec," Damon said, jumped back to his feet and re-entered the kitchen, covering the cell phone with his hands.
"Elena, would you like to visit Ric and his girlfriend Jenna tonight? They invited us over for dinner," he conveyed Alaric's suggestion.
"Sounds great, I'd love to. Please say hi from me," she requested and smiled, happy to finally get to know Jenna. She had already heard a lot about her and was delighted to get to know somebody else who was privy to the vampire stuff.
Damon returned the smile, "Elena says hi, Ric, and we'll gladly come. Shall we say around eight?"
"Perfect. We're looking forward to it. See you later, Damon," Alaric said happily.
"We too, man. Laters," he answered and hung up.
"Err, Damon, if we see them at eight… we'll only have two hours before you have to feed on me…," Elena mentioned slightly irritated.
"I know, but Alaric will tell Jenna about our connection, so I think it wouldn't be a big deal to slip away for a couple of minutes to their bathroom. Or if that's too weird for you, we can of course head home," he suggested.
"Okay, sounds like a good plan," she agreed and placed the emptied cup of coffee on the table, finally grabbing something to eat.
Damon sat down again and watched her unobtrusively. He had noticed lately that whenever she was in that absent-minded state, she had stopped eating properly. She had already lost some pounds and considering her already petite figure, this couldn't be healthy. He really hoped that she would be able to build some trust in Jenna and maybe she was the one to help her out of her misery.
Hand in hand, Damon and Elena walked along the posh streets of the Upper Eastsidein companionable silence. Damon caressed the back of Elena's hand gently while she leaned closer to him. She loved the way he made her feel safe and precious, and she couldn't help but stop at some point to step in his way and kissed him hotly without warning.
"Mhmm, easy, Elena," he breathed against her lips, instantly aroused by her passionate assault, "Otherwise, I can't guarantee for anything," he whispered as he kissed along her jawline right down to the sensitive spot beneath her earlobe.
"Ah… I just wanted to show you what I feel," she moaned with closed eyes, relishing his hot breath against her soft skin.
"And I really appreciate the gesture, babe, but I guess we should continue this somewhere else. Unless, of course, you want to see me losing it right here and now," he smiled against her cheek, fondling her sides lustfully.
"Okay, you win," she whimpered quietly as she felt his hardness against her belly, surprised by the effect she had on him.
"It's only a pleasure deferred!" he promised, placing a soft kiss on her still parted lips.
"Can't wait," she admitted honestly but also a little bit shyly, not used to flirting like this.
"Well, that's good to know," he assured her with a wink when she let him go and walked next to him again. He entwined his fingers with hers once more. With a mischievous grin on both their faces, they continued the short way to Alaric's apartment.
Damon rang the door bell and waited, looking down on Elena's face. He would have given everything he's got to know her thoughts. She seemed to be far away again. He hadn't informed her about Jenna's profession, not sure if she would have felt uncomfortable or forced to open up to her. She would find out on her own soon and then she could decide if she wanted to talk to her or not.
When the door opened, Elena's expression lightened up immediately and she hugged Alaric amicably.
"Hello, Elena, it's good to see you again," Alaric welcomed her and hugged her back.
"Likewise, Ric, and thank you so much for the invitation," she said happily, stepping aside to make room for the men to shake hands.
"Hey, buddy, I'm glad you made it," Alaric greeted Damon, clapping him on the back.
"Sure, man. We're happy to be here," Damon told him, returning the gesture.
"Come inside, please. Jenna is in the kitchen, dinner is as good as ready," he informed Damon and Elena, who quickly stepped into the apartment, handing Alaric their jackets which he hung on a rack next to the door. They followed him through the small, dimly-lit hallway into the brightly arranged living room. A comfortable looking sofa corner separated the large room into a dining and a TV area. In the white, modern open-plan kitchen, Jenna seemed busy hiding something from her guests.
"Oh shit," she cursed, frantically trying to cram the boxes of the delivery service into the trash can. "Oh Lord, what a great first impression," she whined being caught red-handed, but smiled while she shrugged her shoulders.
"You must be Elena! Hello! I'm Jenna," she introduced herself as she walked around the cooking island, reaching out her hand. "I'm sorry, but Damon is such a great cook, and I wanted to be on the safe side," she explained, shaking Elena's hand and glanced over to Damon, winking at him.
"Hi, Jenna! Never mind, I totally agree. When it comes to cooking, I wouldn't want to compete with him either."
"Oh Ladies, there's a vampire blushing," Damon grinned while Alaric chuckled from behind.
"Let me hug you, Damon," Jenna said and wrapped her arms around Damon's neck. "It's really good to have the two of you here tonight," she added and smiled at her guests.
"Thanks for having us," Damon replied and grinned back at her. He had always got along well with Jenna which made him really happy because she meant so much to his best friend. He had some damn great memories of fun nights with them when Jenna had visited Alaric during her vacations.
"What about a drink? Elena? Damon?" Alaric barged in and pointed to the well-filled cabinet next to the flat-screen TV.
"I'm in!" Damon blurted out instantly and walked right behind Alaric to examine the liquor.
"Let the guys have the booze. I've got something better for us girls," Jenna revealed and beamed promisingly. She opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle of champagne, wagging it euphorically in front of Elena's face.
"Want some?" Jenna offered and grinned mischievously.
"Absolutely!" Elena answered abuzz and smirked back.
"Perfect! I have already placed the champagne glasses on the table. Could you help me with the bowls, please?"
"Of course, is anything else missing on the table?" Elena questioned while she took the bowls of which one was filled with an incredibly smelling Thai-curry and the other with rice and positioned them in the middle of the beautifully laid glass-table.
"No, I guess that's all. Thank you!"
"Anytime."
"What about you, guys? Ready for dinner?" Jenna called for the men while she opened the champagne bottle expertly and filled the sparkling liquid into the glasses, handing one over to Elena.
"Cheers!" Jenna said and raised her glass.
"Cheers! And congratulations on you're successfully passed examination!" Elena smiled and clinked glasses with Jenna.
"Aw, thanks a lot. I'm so happy that it's finally over. It was the hardest time of my life so far. It was horrible to live so many miles away from Alaric," Jenna sighed heavily.
"It's even hard to imagine. Say, what have you studied at all?"
"Oh, I've studied psychology on the West Coast," she informed Elena and blinked over her shoulder to watch out for the men, just missing the way Elena's eyebrows furrowed in surprise.
"Are you coming, or what?" she hissed at Alaric and Damon who were just throwing their heads back to drown their drinks in sync.
"Yes, ma'am," Damon answered instantly and walked across the walnut wooden floor towards the table with Alaric on his trail.
While everybody took a seat, laughed and chatted Elena remained quiet. She felt a little confused at the revelation that Jenna was a therapist. Would Jenna notice that something had happened to her? She was an expert, Elena thought, sooner or later she would see through her; she was certain. She didn't like the idea, though. Actually, she had been looking forward to this evening, hoping for some kind of distraction. Lately at home, her thoughts had infinitely circled around her past and all she had wanted was a short timeout of that spiral, but now the topic was back in the center of her mind.
She had been optimistic that she could become friends with Jenna, but now she wasn't so sure about it anymore. She was nice and funny, yes, but the second she found out about Elena's past, Jenna wouldn't be able to see more in her than the victim who needed to be fixed, would she? This was a messed-up situation and she felt increasingly uncomfortable in her own skin.
Only after a minute she suddenly realized that everybody was already eating. Everybody apart from Damon who stared knowingly at her. Elena looked down quickly, finding some of the curry on her plate as well and started to pick at it.
What was Damon expecting of her? She couldn't just talk to Jenna, could she? That would be more than inappropriate; she was at home and not at work. Jenna wanted to celebrate, for God's sake! Yes, she had told Damon that she needed help and she was convinced it was necessary, especially after this morning, but this set-up surprised her and she felt kind of pushed into it.
"Is everything okay, Elena?" Jenna asked carefully, noticing the change of mood and the concerned expression on Damon's face didn't slip her attention either.
"Err…yes. Everything's fine," she stuttered, giving Jenna a shy side-glance before she took the first bit of her dinner.
"I don't know, somehow you seem so concerned. Is it because of the thing between you and Damon? If it is, you don't have to worry about it. Alaric filled me in and if you need some privacy… it's totally fine by me," Jenna assured kindly and smiled heartily at Elena.
"Thank you, Jenna, but we'll finish dinner first, right Elena? Damon answered for Elena, hoping she would look at him and it worked indeed. Elena raised her head to meet his eyes, but the emotions flashing over her face didn't do anything to calm him down. She looked totally overcharged.
"Yes, we can wait," Elena confirmed with a broken voice and continued eating.
"May I ask you then what it is like to be in your situation? I mean, from what Alaric told me it must have been a shock. You didn't know each other and suddenly you're forced to spend the rest of all time together. The first comparison that crossed my mind was a forced marriage…," Jenna explained as her eyes darted between Damon and Elena.
"No, it's not!" Elena blurted out instantly "I mean it might give the impression since we kinda stumbled into this connection but no, it feels nothing like a forced marriage," she stated but when she stared down onto her plate the bad feelings inside her took over again "At least not for me," she whispered, well knowing that Damon would hear her doubt.
Alaric frowned at Damon who looked pretty hurt while Jenna observed Elena emphatically.
They finished dinner without talking about the topic again; instead, Jenna jumped in and told some stories about her college-time. While she was speaking, Damon saw on the look of her face, when she glanced to Elena from time to time, that she drew conclusions concerning his girlfriend. Jenna was a very sensitive and compassionate woman and she was able to figure one out within seconds and that was exactly what she did with Elena right now.
Damon noticed the first soft whisper of Elena's blood, just when Jenna and Alaric went into the kitchen to prepare dessert. Although she already seemed kind of unsettled, the unhappy expression remained on her face and she didn't even want to look him in the eye. This was new to him, or at least he hadn't felt this kind of distance between them for a very long time.
"We need to talk, Elena," Damon said with determination, raised from his chair and walked around the table, holding his hand out to her. Elena bit her lower lip and stiffened instantly, but she didn't move or look at him. Damon waited, unsure of what he was supposed to do.
"I know," she finally gathered herself, turned around and allowed Damon to pull her to her feet.
"Alaric said, we could use their bedroom," Damon informed her and walked over to the door on the opposite side of the table, holding Elena's hand all the way. He opened the door for her and let her enter. He followed right behind her and closed the door, taking a deep breath to compose himself while Elena positioned herself in front of the bed, refusing to look at him.
"What's gotten into you?" he demanded, having a hard time to keep his frustration at bay.
"What's gotten into me is that Jenna is a therapist, but you knew that already, didn't you?" she barked at him but sniffed at the same time due to the tears in her eyes.
Oh, Lord he hated it when she was crying; it always prevented him from thinking rationally. The problem was that he was upset this time.
"Yes, I did," he confirmed, grabbed her arms, turned her around and held her in place. "And now what? Do you blame me for not telling you right away?" he asked roughly, causing Elena to cringe. "Wasn't it you who told me that you needed help?" he couldn't stop to talk himself into a rage, letting out all the bottled up frustration caused by the helplessness he felt while Elena's mental healing stagnated.
"And isn't it you who stopped eating properly lately, losing more and more weight? Did you really believe that I wouldn't notice? Damn it, Elena, I fucking worry about you and I just hoped that meeting Jenna would finally give you an opportunity to talk to someone you can trust, and who is able to handle your past properly," he nearly shouted at her but he regretted it the moment his rage faded and he noticed the tears streaming down Elena's face.
"I'm so sorry, Damon," she wept aloud and collapsed into his arms, "It wasn't my intention to bother you," she sobbed against his chest. She tried to find solace in their closeness and the comfort of his strong arms.
"You don't have to be sorry, Elena. I should apologize, I shouldn't have exploded like this. It's just…," Damon stopped in the middle of the sentence, not sure how to express his feelings.
"What?" Elena sniffed and tilted her head back, glancing at him.
Damon wiped the tears from her blushed cheeks in such a gentle way, that Elena wasn't able to keep herself from trembling.
"It's just… I never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. And as beautiful as it is to love you with all I have, it is hard as well. I love you, and because I love it hurts me so much to see you in pain, so damn much that sometimes I don't know how to handle those feelings. I want to protect you, more than you can imagine, and when I'm not able to help you in any way, it makes me freak out like this. I didn't mean to hurt you - I just want you to heal. Can you believe me?" Damon asked softly, tucking a strand of her silken brown hair behind her ear.
Elena stared at him in amazement, "I believe you, Damon. I guess… I just needed to hear it. Not just that you love me, but also how frustrated you are. Sometimes, I'm so wrapped up in my memories that I forget everything around me, and that is not fair to you. You deserve better than this, Damon. Our relationship is not just about me, it's about you as well and it's not enough that you know it; I need you to feel it too. I love you so much, Damon, and I'm going to heal. Not just for me, but also for you."
Damon blinked just once before his lips crushed on hers. While he breathed her unique scent and felt her body pressed flush against his, a huge load was taken off his heart and mind.