Author's Note: Well this is a doozy of a pickle no? What happened,by who and why? Let's find out shall we?

Thanks to FH and RR for the reviews

Chapter 88

Degrees of Devastation

Vivian I now realize does not like hospitals. She looks lost at first then I see this anger build in her eyes, not at the doctors racing to the injured but to just how bad it got! I know she remembers her district and her aid station. This is worse, much worse.

Because it wasn't an enemy that did this to them it was a friendly.

I know if I took her up to the other levels she would be lost to know where to go, but I do see something that gives me pause. Some of the teams see her they seems to brighten.

I recognize an orderly and bring him over to us.

"Viv why don't you help out?" I look at her and she looks shocked, "it will be good for moral and I don't think you'll like the other units, stick here the orderly can show you what to do"

"Right" she says then when I turn, "wait where are you going?" she adds

"ICU" I reply, I had glimpsed the board before heading to the express elevator; Gale and Ken are in ICU, Peeta and Katniss in the burn unit.

Burn unit is a 'clean' area I will need to wash before going in and out and wear a special suit to not bring in anything.

Plus they probably will not have what I need.

Ken might, as would Gale.

If they are okay that is, and can talk.

ICU is a mess, there are beds in the hallways, there are people in dire need of morphline at the very least to give some comfort. They are using color triage tags. Ken was walking he would be less priority than Gale who had to be taken by stretcher.

Ken is my first guess.

His room is darkened, he's sharing the room with someone on a respirator. Not Gale though, it's another commander.

"Who is it?" I hear him ask, weird question. Then I see why.

Ken has a bandage over his eyes. No... what Boreal told us, looking at the first flash of an explosion could do this, it's why he checked my eyes after that radiation burst when I said my eyes felt like they were burning.

"It's me" I say coming over, he tries to sit up, "its okay Ken you don't have to get up, how are you feeling?"

He waves his hand in front of his face, "apart from not seeing?"

"Ken I-"

"It's okay, I should have remembered what Perry warned us about, I was face front about to run back when 'fwoosh' bright blast of lights then lights out" he pauses, "docs say it could be temporary, and Cartwright is a nice nurse she helped me away"

"So it was Delly" I reply, "she's changed"

"War does that" he smirks, "you're not hurt are you?"

I pause, "how can you….why would-"

"Are you hurt?!" he reaches out worried, "Ariana!"

"I'm fine" I snap, then withdraw, "Ken why the hell are you asking after me? You got blinded by an order I gave"

"One of the doctors said that's what Gale wanted to know, I said if you came I would ask, surprised you didn't see him first" he says, "and I went before you even ordered me to remember, you never told us to go we just went when you told us the plan" he adds, he has a point but he waits for me to explain why I am with him and not Gale.

"You're my crew" I say, "I have to see you first, wouldn't feel right"

He nods, "why didn't you call us back?"

Clue number one, "I did, I was calling you back just before the rifles went off"

He shakes his head, "no I would have heard it would I? or gotten a message?...actually" he takes his communicator, "I did, it had said all was safe" he fiddles with it and then hands it over, wrapping his hands around mine, "I'll be okay Ari, plus Dell is gonna come see to me"

"Dell?" I raise a brow, "already on first name basis?"

He pauses, "actually when you were shot she had come to check on you, when I had visited while you were still out we got to talking and…well"

"Like them young don't you?" I tease, "first me, and Delly is younger than me, who next Posy?"

"Well if I get turned down by Delly you never know" he jokes, he hasn't let go of my hands, "who held you back?" he asks, "since you aren't injured someone must have held you back otherwise you'd be in the burn unit or here in ICU"

"Paylor"

"Bless her then, she was thinking clearly"

"Yeah" I reply and he pats my hand, even if I can't see his eyes thru the gauze wrapped around his head I can tell he's tired, he's probably been shot and has bruising or other damage, "you should rest Ken, I'll visit again okay?"

"Go see your boyfriend" he says, and he clarifies, "that's an order from your second in command commander"

I can feel tears build but I push them down, "consider it done" I touch his face, "you rest okay?"

He nods and then leans back in bed resting his hands on his chest.

Gale is in a room on his own. I know he was wearing armor but I can tell he was hit more than Ken. He's hooked up to a ventilator. A blood transfusion in his arm aswell as a morphline drip.

How did Ken know he was asking after me?

Unless Gale managed to say something during transport.

I wasn't with them on their arrival. I take a look at his chart, he had had surgery, part of his spleen had to be removed, as well as part of his liver. Won't matter, Gale didn't drink, at least not when we were in Twelve. In fact I think he tried a sip of moonshine and asked if it was meant to remove paint. I don't think having less liver or spleen will affect him. Except he will be hurting for a while. I wish I could talk to him but he's not coming around for a while now. I do sit with him for an hour just holding his hand as the machines say he is still alive despite the state he is in. I wonder if he felt like I do now, when I was shot, helpless and alone, guilty that our roles are not switched. He must have, I remeber when I had finally come round he looked so relieved to see me awake, he must have felt like I do now.

I can't stay any longer a nurse warns me that we can only stay with patients for an hour tops, because of how frantic it's getting.

I give her my contact information so they can call me, it's just my name and that if they contact command of Thirteen they can reach me. It's the best I can do considering we don't have a place to sleep right now.

I head for the burn unit.

I shower; I scour my skin clean until its bright pink then I put on clean clothes and a paper disposable jumpsuit. I could just get away with a thorough hand wash but I don't want to take any risks. The burn unit is so careful about any contagion coming in that even if you have a minor cold, just a runny nose they won't allow you in if you are visiting new patients.

I wish I had a cold now.

As much as I hurt that Ken is blinded however temporary it is, as much as I feel gutted my boyfriend isn't out of the woods yet.

Nothing compares to seeing Katniss and Peeta.

They are in separate rooms only separated by a wall; their rooms are positive pressured with special doors that open only when the secondary door closes. I look at them, both on ventilation, both sedated because of the burns.

The burns have taken them. Katniss has burns across her shoulders her neck, her arms and chest, her hands are spared and her face. She's twitchy even under sedation. She was lucky, she's covered in gauze already and skin graphs, it's amazing how fast they work on her.

Not so with Peeta. I look in his rooms and the doctors and nurses are still fussing with him. I take his chart and it has a schematic of his body, red to note his burn. Both his arms and hands, his neck and back, his forehead and his chest. Oh Peeta! I remember seeing him race to grab Katniss as the fires blasted angrily! Of all times why do Mellarks always choose to rush headlong into a hazard. I look and I see he is fighting the ventilation tube. He's gagging, he's seizing from shock and they want to give him more sedation. I tie my hair back put on a surgical cap, gloves and mask. I rush in and find a place he isn't burnt. I touch his cheek as he continues to seize. I want to cry right now, of all of them Peeta is in the worse shape. The most in danger even outside of a battle, his injuries are so critical he has gone into shock. Why him of all people?!

"Can you get an line by his foot?" I ask, "his arms can't take that right now, or a central line, just not his arms" I ask and the nurse nods who is on my side, she sets up for a central line.

When they finally give him medication to keep him under he relaxes. Then the burn specialist come in an apply the cold packs designed to leech off any residual heat that is still in his skin, its done a few times I know because of the procedures I read two years ago. I called it light reading, Church called it overkill.

Church, I had forgotten we are at St. Augustine! When I see Peeta is in good hands, hands more practiced in burn care I step away. Not before stroking his unburned cheeks. I'm just glad none of his injuries are to the point of being painless, it's a horrible thought but it means he hasn't lost sensitivity, if he feels pain it's good. All their burns thankfully are second degree, but its going to be at least a couple weeks of heavy treatment for either to be 'on the mend'.

I ask after Church and am directed to the offices one floor down.

When I get to her office I see absolutely nothing has changed. Her desk is still knickknack free. Her pictures are perfectly aligned on her wall with her diplomas and accreditations. But she's not here.

She's behind me.

"Wondered when I'd see you again, Ariana" her clipped voice only holds mild amusement with her disciplinary attitude, "come to help out?"

I don't answer at first, she comes around to face me, looking me up and down since I've changed back into my uniform. "you'll have to get changed if you are."

"No" I say finally, "sorry, no, just passing thru"

She sighs, "pity we need a few more sets of hands"

"I was wondering, about Hawthorne, Colins said he asked after me?" I look at her expectantly

She smirks, "he wanted to get off the stretcher, despite having three shots at his vest at near point blank he was fighting off two orderlies and his doctor before we could knock him out" she looks up at me as she puts on her reading glasses, "said he had to make sure you were okay. He'll pull thru, I was his surgeon."

"And Colins?" I ask, to this she frowns

"We will have to see, no pun obviously" she says when I am looking way too serious, "don't worry all commanders and 'Star Squad' as they are called are under specialist care due to their injuries"

I nod, "if any of them ask after me"

"I will find you, now that you are going under your actual name I don't think we have a problem finding you" she smirks, "good to see you though."

"And you" I turn and leave.