Thanks to all of you who favorite and alerted the story. I want to especially thank all the wonderful reviewers, your words of encouragement and the feedback you offer gives me energy to do my best.

Disclaimer 1: I do not own Twilight

Disclaimer 2: Please be warned that this work will include physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I DO NOT promote, condone or accept abuse in any shape or form. This is a fictional work with fictional characters and I present it as such.

Chapter 5

Why am I still alive? Pondered Seth as he examined his most recent bruises. Two months passed and to everybody's surprise he was still around. It was not like Jacob was treating him well, far from it. His punishments were unfair and unreasonable. The sub hissed as the pain from his cracked rib reminded him of his last ordeal. He had done everything he was asked to do in bed, as painful as it was he took it without complaining even once.

Seth bit his bottom lip as a habit, he always did that when he was deep in thought, unfortunately in this occasion the pain woke him up from his stupor. Just like his rib his lip was split open and a purple/black bruise adorned the left side of his face, and all this for the terrible infraction of trying to kiss his master. Jacob had ordered Seth to pretend he was enjoying sex, in an attempt to please his master he tried to kiss him. His master responded by ramming his fist on his face and kicking him as hard as he could, Seth was launched from the bed ending up on the hard floor.

He remembered Jacob's words, each one of those painful reminders of what the sub was, a piece of shit on the sidewalk. Don't ever try that again, are you listening dog? Your disgusting mouth must never touch my lips. You have sucked more cock than a sloppy crack whore. If you pull that move again I'll be very, very tempted to rip your fucking lips from your face. I mean it; you're a fucking disgusting ugly piece of trash... He went on and on with the insults until he ran out of things to say. Seth had to stay impassive on the floor in his submissive position while holding on to his side which was throbbing with what he knew was a broken rib.

Jacob got dressed but before leaving the room he ordered Seth to clean his office. Seth started cleaning his master's office diligently and with attention to every small detail. He dusted every bookshelf admiring and longing to read any of those books. It had been so long since he had been allowed to read and unfortunately he will likely never read again. He thought that maybe in heaven he will be able to enjoy the simple pleasure of reading. He took every book out, caressing the cover like it was a sacred stone only to place it back on the exact same spot.

If there was one thing Jacob hated with a passion was for people to move his things, he liked to find everything in the same spot where he left it. After finishing the bookshelves Seth stood beside his master's desk trying to figure out what to do. It was not exceedingly messy, a couple of picture frames, several folders and a small mountain of papers. The sub decided to clean the desk little by little placing each item in exactly the same spot. The first frame had a picture of a woman that had a striking resemblance to Jacob. Her skin was the same stunning honeyed color, her eyes had spark and a hint of unholy mischief. Her lips were a shade darker than her skin and just like his master were full but not trout like. Seth could only imagine how his master's lips tasted, how soft they would feel against his own. Lately his fantasies had changed, now they contained dreams and secret desires for his master. He was well aware that this was really messed up but it didn't matter, apparently Seth was a sick fuck, or at least that was what his master thought of him. Maybe he was a masochist, even though it was not like he could get off on his master's attacks or that he enjoyed them, actually it was the opposite, he had forgotten when he had his last orgasm. What he did admit was that he couldn't hate him. He hated his actions, his lack of compassion, his aggression and his hate; but he couldn't bring himself to hate the man.

His eyes drifted back to the picture, after examining it for a minute he assumed she was his mom and placed it back in the same spot he took it from. The second frame contained a picture of Billy, Jacob's mom and a little boy who Seth assumed was his master. The little boy had the most adorable happy expression, his innocence not yet soiled by the cruelty of the world. Seth wondered what happened to that little boy, what made him the man he was. It must have been a horror of death to transform a gentle creature into a heartless monster.

It took Seth over an hour to clean the desk, at the end everything looked the same but clean. At last the hardest chores were done and he could go back to his usual routine which he had neglected because of his master's order. Busy with his latest task, Seth had forgotten to eat and his stomach complained loudly. He went to his bathroom where he had been able to hide a piece of bread and a slice of ham from breakfast. After many days spent hungry he learned to ration his food, hiding it in his bathroom. Seth sat on the cold tile and retrieved the food from his hiding place. He ate quietly and slowly downing the food with big gulps of water to make every bite count, this was a way to trick himself into thinking he had consumed the appropriate amount of nourishment.

As on cue when he finished washing his hands he heard the door open and two sets of heavy steps resonated in the room. He rushed to his place beside his chain waiting to respond to his master's wishes.

"What the fuck!" Seth's heart accelerated and his blood ran fast and hot in his veins when the angry voice of his master reached his ears. He prayed that his master's anger would not be directed at him or that he would have to pay for whatever was going on.

"Jake what's wrong?" The voice was completely new to Seth. The man had a slight southern drawl and his tone was peaceful and calm.

"That fucking lazy bum good for nothing bitch…" Jacob's engaged in a short monologue that managed to include every bad word known to man and a few that he probably invented.

"Dog, come here now!" Bellowed Jacob. Seth had to force himself and make his legs move; it was like they were made of lead. He was deadly afraid of his master's wrath especially considering he had no clue as to what was going on.

Seth walked in the office his eyes downcast but still able to see the irate face of his master. His expression was dark and threatening. His nostrils flared, eyes reduced to slits, jaw clenched and his mouth quivering with the anger that was boiling inside him, locking away any good feeling he ever had. He looked like a very tortured, mentally unstable soul.

"I believe I told you to clean my office." Growled Jacob, his voice seething with anger.

The sub couldn't respond, unable to speak without authorization Seth just nodded. "Speak!" Ordered Jacob.

"I cleaned it master" Whispered Seth.

In one stride Jacob was standing in front of his sub and slapped him hard across the face. "Liar!" Screamed Jacob painfully loud. He grabbed Seth's arm so hard the sub feared he would crush the bone with his bare hands. Roughly pulling Seth toward the desk Jacob pushed the sub's head down until it was just inches from the surface of the desk. "Does this look clean to you? Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Jake…" The man who Seth had never seen before tried to intervene only to receive a growl from his master.

"If this idiot thinks he can get away with disobeying my orders he has another thing coming." Growled Jacob under his breath. Seth's whole body shook as fear spewed from each one of his pores. He noticed as his master was looking around his desk, his lips quirked upwards to form a malicious smile. In an instant, before Seth could even think of what was going to happen Jacob slapped Seth's hand flat on the desk and with a marble paperweight smashed the sub's middle and ring finger. Seth heard the bones breaking a fraction of a second before he felt the pain, which was extreme to say the least.

Cradling his shattered fingers to his chest the sub sunk down to the floor. Not one sound escaped his lips, it couldn't, Seth couldn't breathe, the pain so intense it affected his ability to move air in and out of his body. As soon as he could inhale enough air a painful sob broke out of him. A stream of pitiful tears rolling down his face. Seth felt the cold sharp pain shooting up his arm, the nausea taking over. He felt color leave his face as he fought the nausea, not wanting to add fuel to his master's fire.

Why? Why? Why? Why? Seth asked himself the same question over and over again. He wouldn't dare muster it out loud and he couldn't conjure any other thought. He did the best he could and still it was not good enough, it was not fair. Then again, life was not fair to him. He didn't want to be a baby and complain with the why me? But it was becoming much more than his tortured body could handle. His spirit was being crushed to the point of being broken beyond repair. For the first time in his life he was lost and risking becoming hopeless.

"Jake!" The man who Seth had never seen screamed at the master as soon as his shock wore off.

"Carlisle shut it!" Spat Jacob.

"No I won't! What's wrong with you?"

"This mother fucker is, I have been too lenient with this dog and he is taking advantage of that." Lenient? Jacob Black lenient? Those were words that could never be together in a sentence. If up to that point Seth's master had been lenient, how was it going to be when he wasn't?

"Jacob Ephraim Black if you instead of jumping the gun took a minute too look beyond the reach of your nose you would see this desk is spotless. It probably took him forever to clean everything and put it on the same spot so you wouldn't complain of him moving your things." Carlisle spoke a thousand words per minute, indignation, anger and pity getting the best of him. He had known Jacob since he was a little boy and saw his transformation from a happy go lucky kid whose smile and laugh were infectious to the bitter, cruel man in front of him.

Jacob didn't respond he just looked from Carlisle to the desk with a confused expression on his face. He took one item and ran his fingers over the polished surface, he couldn't see any dust. He repeated the same action several times on different spots with the same result.

Seth remained on the floor suffering in silence the latest injustice. His cry was barely a whisper, like a ghost that's lost its way unable to find peace even in death. As tears rolled down his face they ended up on his swollen and throbbing hand which he held close to his chest. He was making an inhumane effort to not allow a full torrent of painful sobs to escape his lips. For some stupid reason he was still clinging on to life or maybe it was ingrained in his psyche that no matter what, he must not aggravate his master.

Carlisle approached the sub kneeling in front of him and motioning to grab his swollen appendage. Seth panicked knowing very well he would not be able to endure any more pain, as it was he was reaching his limit. "Please sir… no more" the subs words contained defiance since he was not given permission to speak, but at that moment Carlisle didn't care about that. All he saw was a broken creature, the remnants of what could have been a man filled with possibilities, love and hope. Instead fate handed him a conviction without crime, a punishment without fault. He was a stickler for the rules and known to have taken a sub on more than one occasion but he would never hurt them. He pitied these sad animals sent to the earth to suffer.

"I'm not going to hurt you, I'm a doctor. Can I take a look at your hand?" His voice was soft and amazingly soothing. His gentle approach helped Seth calm down a little and stop the destructive monologue that until that moment was going on in his head.

"Carlisle, what the hell are you doing?" Asked Jacob.

"What do you think I am doing? I'm going to check his hand."

"Why? He is just a dog"

"Maybe he is, but I would check a dog's paw if I saw it limping. I would do a lot more for a man."

"Do whatever you want; you can count this as your good deed of the day." Jacob went around his desk and started looking at some of the papers on it.

"Let me see." Commanded Carlisle, his voice dripping with such authority Seth had no choice but obey. He extended his hand which had a purple bruise that comprised most of the back of his hand. His broken fingers laid twisted in an unnatural position. Carlisle carefully examined Seth's digits while trying to sooth him. It was the first time in only God knew how long that a dominant had touched the sub in a gentle compassionate way.

"I think it's a simple fracture but I may be mistaken, without an x-ray is hard to tell. I do know that I need to realign the bones before I immobilize them. I'm not going to lie to you sub, this will hurt but I'll work as fast as I can." The sub nodded in understanding and acceptance.

"Jacob, make yourself useful and come here, I need your help."

"I'm not helping you, if you insist on being a Good Samaritan you can manage by yourself."

"Jake you can be such a jackass sometimes, come here! Unless you want me to go find somebody in the house to help me… maybe your father."

"That's a cheap shot, ok ok, keep your panties on; I'll help you." Jake kneeled beside his sub who immediately tensed because of the proximity of his dominant. "What do you want me to do?"

"I have to reduce the fracture; I cannot have him squirming around. What I need you to do is put your arms around him making sure to hold his other hand and keep him still while I work." Explained Carlisle.

"Whatever, let's get this over with." Answered Jacob dismissively. He slid closer to the sub and placed one of his long legs over Seth's legs and the other around his back. Being so close to his little dog he could almost smell the fear emanating through each one of his pores. It was intoxicating and exhilarating. Jacob had become addicted to power and believed that instilling fear in others made him even more powerful.

"You may want to look the other way kid." Instructed Carlisle as he readied himself to pull the bones into place. Seth couldn't look the other way, if he did he would be faced with his dominant up close and personal, something way scarier than what the doctor was about to do.

Without any notice Carlisle took Seth's middle finger and pulled hard aligning the portions of bone. Seth tried to remain quiet but the pain was too overwhelming and he let out an unearthly scream that made Jacob tighten his grip around him and his heart race.

"That one is done; I'll give you a minute to recover before the other one." Seth just nodded while heavy tears formed an incessant torrent down his face ending up on his shirt.

"Jacob I hope you are happy; this is all your fault. He did nothing wrong and you still punished him. You shot and then stopped to ask questions. You… you should be ashamed of yourself, I know I am and so is your father." At this words Jacob felt his jaw tense as the pain of being a total disappointment resurfaced.

Whether it was Carlisle painful words with all the shameful truth that was imbedded on them or the harrowing sobs being produced by his sub, something in Jacob tried to come to life. Something that had been hidden under a blanket of hate, regret and guilt. Years ago he had taken his compassion and locked it in a box, threw away the key and burrowed it in the deepest recesses of his soul. In that instant it sputtered, like a motor trying to come to life. Unfortunately there was no fuel in that motor and it remained hidden and turned off even though it was not completely extinguished. Jacob looked away willing and daring his tears to stay where they were, he would not have this filthy dog see him cry.

"Kid, let's do the other one, then the hard part will be over, all that will be left is placing the splint and taping your fingers together. And Jacob he will not be able to use that hand for at least two days." Jacob remained quiet deeply troubled for reasons that he didn't want to acknowledge. Seth cowered back unconsciously trying to get away from the doctor. Using brute strength his master held him in place, his hands shaking from the deep emotions that were stirring inside him.

Doing something unexpected he removed the hand that was holding Seth's good hand and gently moved the sub's face so it was hidden on the crook of his neck. Jacob felt a strange sensation when the warm breath of his submissive fanned over his skin. The sub relaxed after a minute and he moved his hand back to hold Seth's hand once more and nodded to Carlisle to continue.

Once more the doctor painfully adjusted Seth's fingers. This time the sub screamed against the skin of his master's neck, his agonizing tears falling on his master's shirt. "Jake I have to go to my office to get the materials I need; I'll be back in five minutes." Jacob observed as the doctor placed Seth's hand on a heavy book and ordered him not to move it.

After Carlisle left, Jake and Seth stayed in the same position, neither one of them daring to move a centimeter. Seth crying quietly on his master's tight hold and Jacob lost in thought. "They are right; she would've been so disappointed in me…" Seth realized his master was thinking out loud and didn't acknowledge his words. Instead basked in his scent and the rhythmic beating of his heart, in all the years he had been a sub there had only been a handful of times in which he could feel this closeness to another human being, even if that being was a heartless monster with total disregard for his feelings or well-being.

Upon Carlisle return Jacob stood up and without saying a word left the room. The doctor got busy making sure Seth couldn't move his fingers. "He was not always like this; life has changed him so much. A person in your position must think 'boo hoo how bad could life be for a rich dominant', but there is a lot more under the surface that the eye can't see. Do you realize this has been the first time in many many years I've seen him be humane to a sub? Of course that was after breaking your fingers, I'll give you that. But trust me I've seen him do worse things without even batting an eye." Seth listened quietly trying to picture the happy child from the picture and not the monster he faced every single day.

It had been one month since the incident, Seth's fingers were healed and regardless of what Carlisle said, Jacob was indeed a monster. He stood by the window looking out onto a world he would never see, a world where he would never get to walk free. He observed the colorful blanket of leaves that covered parts of the yard and a flock of geese going south. It was a beautiful fall day with a perfect blue sky and puffy white clouds moving rapidly across the sky.

There was a lot of commotion in the house as the preparations for the festivities took place. Billy's birthday was always a big deal and something celebrated by everybody in the house and nearby areas. When his master informed Seth he was going to be allowed to go to the party he was both surprised and excited. He tried to find his best clothes which were the ones with the least amount of holes and rips. After hurrying to do his chores he stood by the window waiting for his master to come get him. What excited him the most was the possibility of seeing Embry, he was able to put together from different conversations that Sam would be present and since Billy requested everybody's presence, including the subs, Embry was bound to come with him.

Seth squinted his eyes trying to see the faces of the people arriving at the party, but Embry was nowhere in sight. After an hour he heard the door open and his master's footsteps, assuming his position he waited for a word from him. "Dog listen to me, I'm only going to say this once. The only reason I'm letting people see you with me is because of my father's request. Don't think I have any desire to be in your company when I'm around my friends. You will stay beside me, only moving when I tell you to get me something. You're a dog, when I tell you fetch you move, not before not after. There will be no talking, eating or drinking. If somebody gives you something you will hand it over to me for approval. I swear to you that if you are not on your best behavior the shiner you are sporting right now will be nothing compared to what I'll do to you. Are we clear?"

The sub nodded affirmatively. "Where are my clothes?" Seth waited for permission to speak while his master looked around impatiently. "Damn it, I'm so tired of this shit. You know what? When I ask you something answer immediately, do not wait for authorization. But only to answer questions. Nobody is interested in having a conversation with you."

"They are in your dressing room master." Said Seth in an almost unperceptively voice.

"What are?" Asked Jacob distracted.

"Your clothes master." Seth had ironed a nice button up shirt for his master in a shade of blue that complimented his skin color beautifully. Of course he would wear it with a nice pair of short cargo pants seeing that even with the cooler temperatures it was still too hot form him to wear anything else.

"Come give me a quick blow job before I shower, damn it just a whiff of your scent makes me so fucking horny." Seth did as instructed, making his master empty himself in his mouth with a loud groan.

Seth followed Jacob out of the room realizing this was the first time he had walked anywhere with him. The vast hallways seemed smaller with his master's massive form occupying part of it. The sub never felt smaller than when he was next to his master. Not only his master belittled him every chance he had but Seth barely reached his upper chest. In no time they walked past the pool to meet the other guests, it was a vast area with gardens, shade trees and green grass. To the left Seth could see several tables with fruit, appetizers and pastries.

Seth's first order of business was scanning the area looking for his friend. Unfortunately between Seth's short stature and the number of people that showed up for the party this was no easy task. His master slapped the back of his head hard to get his attention and pulled him toward his father who sat comfortably on a lawn chair surrounded by several men Seth didn't recognize.

"Son glad you could join us, I was getting worried."

"C'mon dad I wouldn't miss it for the world. I had to do some work this morning but I'm here now."

"That you are, pull a chair sit with us." Jacob ordered Seth to bring a chair so he could sit next to his father. Seth sat on the floor next to him, making an effort not to lift his gaze so there wouldn't be any misunderstandings. He was itching to look around to try and find Embry but knew he couldn't, it was going to be a long afternoon.

After a while Seth relaxed enough and allowed himself to look around the vast yard. At a short distance he could see Quil, Alec and the others from his master's pack. Paul was in the company of a beautiful woman with long raven hair, a little girl clung to her mother's skirt probably overwhelmed with the crowd. Seth felt his heart painfully constrict inside his chest. Paul had what he always dreamt of having, a family of his own. Many people dream of power and riches, not Seth, he didn't care for any of that. His dreams consisted on loving and being loved, of having a little child call him daddy and blow raspberries on his cheek.

Most guests approached Billy to wish him a happy birthday, he answered gleefully to all the well wishes. Seth could sense his master's discomfort; he was not one to enjoy social functions and preferred quiet intimate gatherings. On several occasions his master asked him to bring him and his father drinks and food but never gave his authorization for Seth to enjoy anything himself. The party was in full swing with many distinct conversations going on around him. Most of them consisted of comments about the crops or the production of energy. Not even on his birthday Billy was allowed to let his hair down and enjoy himself.

Seth had to lift his eyes when he noticed a shadow covering him after blocking the rays of the sun. In front of him was a man almost as tall as his master, with broad shoulders and a cruel face. He had no idea who this person was until he saw the small figure next to him. His heart jumped to his throat when he got a sight of Embry. He looked thinner and just like Seth sported several bruises on his face, but when their eyes connected he could feel himself smiling. Embry gave him a minute smile of his own before his master walked away to sit to the opposite side of Jacob.

They were so close and still couldn't even say hello, at least he knew Embry was still alive. Just like Seth he had survived longer than most subs survived especially taken into account the brutality that characterized Uley and Black. After several more food and drinks runs Sam and Jacob got up and joined some of the others in the middle of the yard. They were going to have a friendly game of soccer seeing that it was Billy's favorite sport. From what Seth gathered there were two teams one commanded by his master and the other one by Carlos who he knew was Mike's dominant.

Seth moved slightly on his spot to try and see Mike's and Embry's location. Embry was really close just few yards away while Mike was quite farther to the right. The game started and it promised to be quite a spectacle. Nobody was holding back as they maneuvered the ball with the skill of professional players. Billy seemed delighted and cheered his son with pride and excitement. Seth got involved in the game especially since he had never really had the chance to watch any kind of sport from so close.

After the first half was over his master came to sit beside him, without being asked to Seth hurried to grab cold lemonade and water for his master. Jacob accepted the water and told Seth to drink the lemonade himself. His master must be in a good mood, under different circumstance he would just take what he wanted and spill the rest on the floor; then again maybe it was the fact that he was next to his father. Regardless of his motivation Seth was grateful for getting something to quench his thirst.

The second half rolled in with Jacob's team winning four to three. Both teams were lucky there were no referees seeing that neither was obeying any rules. Carlos looked beyond pissed as he pummeled on Jake and the other members of his team. At the end Jacob's team obliterated Carlos team six to three after a fantastic strategy paid off for the winning team.

After the game was over Carlos wouldn't even shake Jacob's hand and turning his back to him walked in the opposite direction. Not one to be shy with words Jake called him a dick and walked back to his spot by his father, who stood up to congratulate his son. Seth looked in the direction where Carlos headed to only see him backhand Mike the second he got close to him. He had to close his eyes as the feeling of impotence and injustice encompassed him. The sub opened them when he felt everybody around him grow eerily quiet. Seth scanned the area trying to figure out the reason for the change of pace. That's when he saw it; Mike was walking backwards away from his master in the direction of the field where the game just took place.

Seth looked on Embry's direction who looked just as stumped as he was. What could possess Mike to do something so crazy; he was going to be unbearably punished for such an act of utter defiance. The sub could hear how Carlos ordered Mike to go to their room and wait for him. But Mike didn't budge, was he going to be so stupid as to try to make a run for it when he was surrounded by dominants? None of the scene unfolding in front of Seth made sense. He wished he could telepathically communicate with Mike to tell him to stop being an idiot and do as he was being told and maybe his master would have mercy on him.

Mike looked disturbed, agitated and scared. His chest raising and falling rapidly and his eyes about to bulge out of his face. Then it hit him, Seth knew what was in Mike's mind. It was a desperate act committed by a hopeless man. The sub shook his head in disbelief, Mike had endured so much, yes he did say he was reaching his limit but he could make it, this was not the way out. Then again it was, maybe he had the right idea after all and Seth should just join him and go out with a bang.

Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. Mike's eyes connected with Seth's an instant before the shift began. Seth jumped to his feet and yelled at him to stop but everything had been set in motion and there was no going back. In the blink of an eye Mike exploded into the dark grey wolf, his neck temporarily constricted by the collar around his neck before his neck snapped and his head rolled in Seth's direction. The wide eyed wolf's head came to rest in front of Billy who covered his eyes, not in fear but in shame and disbelief. The wolf's dead eyes accusing all those who had tortured him and cursing them to remember this instant for the rest of their lives.

Seth stood on his spot incredulity dominating his thoughts. He felt as hot salty tears rolled down his cheeks just to end on his tattered shirt. His master shook him out of his trance. "Go back to the room now!" Ordered Jacob to the top of his lungs. The sub faltered in his step but ran inside as fast as he could, obeying the command and grateful to be allowed to leave the macabre scene.

Jacob entered his room after ordering his pack to dismiss all the guests and disposing of Mike's body. Billy retired to his room, too troubled after witnessing for the first time in his life a sub taking his own life. Jake approached Seth slowly, standing in front of the sub who cried quietly. "What the hell are you doing crying? That idiot ruined my father's birthday." Really? A man just died in front of him and all he cared about was the fucking party? What kind of twisted sick mind has its priorities so screwed?

"That dog was not worth what my father paid for him, why are you crying for him?" Asked Jacob.

Seth looking as forlorn as ever whispered. "Master I cry for him because somebody has to. He was alive and he is no more. He died a miserable death and even if in life he got no respect at least in death I want to honor him. Even if it's with something as simple as my tears."

Jacob was dumbfounded listening to his sub. He had an insight and a perspective he never suspected in somebody as small and insignificant as his dog. The master couldn't debate his sub's argument and just sat on a chair close to him watching as the light of the moon was reflected on the drops that ran down his cheeks. He realized that easily could have been his sub. It was not a matter anymore of not getting a new one; it was a matter that he had a good one and didn't want to let him go. Never before he felt as close and vulnerable when it came to a sub. It scared him, the last thing he wanted was to seem weak, he dreaded the idea of anybody finding out he regretted giving Mike to Carlos, but was extremely grateful he had kept the man in front of him. Once again he felt another piece of ice fall from his cold heart hitting his conscience making him see all the evil and the pain he had caused the poor soul kneeling in front of him.

"What's your name, submissive?" Jacob asked the sub with the intention of at least giving him a bit of dignity back by calling him by his name instead of dog.

"It's Seth, master." The sub's words were barely a whisper. But they were loud screams in his master's ears. Seth demanded justice, he demanded compassion and he demanded hope. Even if he could never muster those words Jacob knew perfectly what was behind that name. But more importantly he knew what that name awakened in him, something scary and delightfully wonderful.