Hello everyone! I know, it's been like, 3 months since I got the Creepers in. This was because of a uh...slight problem with my legs. Anyway, I decided to do Spiders because squids...are just total derps. (Unless your name is Skydoesminecraft, squids are just totally harmless) So...here you go. Spiderps. Also, I don't own Minecraft or Mythbusters or anything else that I refer to. I mean, it's FanFiction, right? Please don't sue me and DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME! (Also, there are some things weird enough in here to say "viewer discretion advised", so...)

Mr. Barry Spider is a tiny mad scientist that lives in his parents' basement where he has access to his irresponsible parents' dangerous explosives and radioactive chemicals for some reason (Someone call the FBI!). One day, he was tinkering with C4, and after watching an episode of Mythbusters and completely ignoring the "don't try this at home" warning at the beginning of the show, he decided he was going to eat it and push a shiny red button (which is always a bad idea, BTW) and see what happens!

He blew up. What did you THINK would happen? Anyway, rewinding to earlier...

Mr. Barry Spider is a tiny mad scientist that lives in his parents' basement where he...Oh wait. You know already. Phooey. One day, he decided to steal his neighbor's dog and then went out to Mexican food for no related reason. When he was there...well, he ordered a burrito. And we ALL know what happens after you eat a burrito (Spoiler alert: You fart). So, Spider had a little bit of, uh...what's the most politically correct way to describe this?... OH! GAS! And thus, he had gas afterward. Wait! I just realized! The burrito has absolutely nothing to do with the main plot! Or does it? Anyway, he somehow put his neighbor's dog on a table and started to pour completely random chemicals into a beaker and he LAUGHED MANIACALLY! (What did you expect him to do? Giggle?) "Now, my EPIC potion of EPICNESS is complete! If I drink it, it will make me SUPER EPIC! Just wait till I tell-"

"HEY, BARRY! ARE YOU WEARING ANY PANTS?!"

"No..."

"OK, JUST CHECKING! MOMMY WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU, HONEEEEEEY!"

"I have such a loving mother."

After that uh...SLIGHT revelation about Spider's personality, he went back to his potion of EPICNESS. "Where was I? Oh yeah. The whole 'potion of EPICNESS' thing. Right. Ok. Here we go. *Ahem* Now, my EPIC potion of EPICNESS is-"

"HONEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!?"

"Aw, what? I'm kinda in the middle of something, here!"

"YOU LEFT YOUR SNICKERDOODLES AT HOME! DON'T WORRY, I'M ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU, HONEY!"

OK, really? Who was stupid enough to put an ExplodingTNT reference in my fanfic? Oh, wait...

"I have such a loving mother. OK, back to the EPIC potion thing again. *Ahem* Now my EPIC potion of EPICNESS is finally-"

May I have a word with you for a second?

"Oh, come on! Ugh, fine. Just make it quick."

He somehow breaks fourth wall to talk with me. I'll be right back...

"...let me..."

...STOP BEING AWESOME!...

"Never!..."

...make you...

"...fine."

So, after that slightly frustrating conversation, I uh...persuaded him to do things my way. You know you're a bad author if you can't control your characters...(!)

"Anyway, back to where I was...Oh, EPIC potion of EPICNESS. I hope that you'll uh...make me EPIC. Wow. This is one bad script."

Just for the record, you were saying basically the same thing, like, a minute ago.

"..."

Do it already. I'm the only reason you exist.

"Daw, fine! I'll drink the stupid thing already!" *glug, glug, glug*

By the way, where was that dog you had a few minutes ago? You were supposed to test the "EPIC" potion on it first.

"Uh oh."

Now if you'll excuse me, I must go hide in a bomb shelter. Goodbye.

"WHAT!?"

Spider started transforming into this freaky, black, multi-eyed, and giant...uh, thing.

"BARRY ANGRYYYY! BARRY SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!"

Is it just me, or have I turned this thing into-

"SMAAAAAASH!"

Or, I've been too lazy to write an actual ending and just let myself get crushed by this...this...regular spider you see in Minecraft. Oh.

And, there you have it. Lazy ending. Tadaah. But, again, I don't know what to do next. You can give me a suggestion in the reviews (but I'd appreciate it if you actually wrote a review), and nothing else. Well, there was an obvious Hulk reference, but... That's really all I have to say for now. The end. Later. Goodbye. So long. Thanks and see ya!

-Lord Lizalfos