Chapter 4.

Emma breathed out slowly as she stared at the ceiling, feeling Regina's hand in her hair. Her eyes fluttered closed contentedly as she listened to the other woman' still rapid heartbeat in her ear, a small smile on her lips, also revelling in the feeling of the rise and fall of Regina's chest.

"We should…move," Regina said after a few moments, clearing her throat.

"Why?" Emma mumbled, not opening her eyes.

Regina shifted her body slightly, but not removing her hand from the other woman's hair, "I'm going to go to bed," she said suddenly, and pushed the other woman away as she sat up.

"What? Are you okay? Regina – ", Emma frowned.

"I'm fine," Regina replied, standing up and grabbing her clothes, "I'm tired," she continued dismissively, walking away.

Emma frowned and swung her legs off the couch, watching the older woman walk away. She sighed, shaking her head; she didn't understand. She knew Regina was scared, but she hadn't figured out exactly what it was she was afraid of. She thought they'd just beaten another barrier down, breaking the sexual tension that had been building up since Emma arrived in Storybrooke but now… Regina was just walking away from her? It was hard not to take offence at that.

Regina closed her bedroom door and threw her clothes onto the floor, climbing into the bed in her underwear. She pulled the covers tight and closed her eyes. She didn't want to think, but she couldn't stop her mind's wheel's turning over and over.

She'd enjoyed having Emma around, but it was a constant battle of when to…dispose of this particular venture. At the start, she'd thought it would be nice to have someone around, a friend, something she'd never really had before, somewhere to share this miserable life with, but then came the attraction and she thought maybe, maybe it could be something more.

After all, she had the blonde's heart in her dungeon; she could make this go any way she wanted. And so she did; but she couldn't help being reminded of her last…conquest. Graham. It had hardly ended well. And did she learn from her mistakes? She thought angrily, what a fool she was being.

She knew this was different anyway; Graham had never been more than a means to an end. She'd wanted to love him, truly she had, but life had been showing her time and time again you can't force love. It might work temporarily but it can never replace the real thing. Maybe if she'd never known true love, it would be enough… Maybe if she'd never known Daniel's love and never felt, expressed her own, then she could settle for this imitation of love.

But she liked Emma, more than she'd ever liked Graham. She didn't want to purely use Emma for sex and company. She actually enjoyed the younger woman's company and when she wasn't around her, her mind wandered tho the younger woman. She didn't even know what this feeling was. She let the tears escape her screwed up eyes.

Emma tossed and turned through the night; she didn't like the way Regina had left things. It was horrible to go from so…ecstatic to total confusion and abandonment. A part of her really wanted to knock on Regina's door and climb into her spacious bed to snuggle up with her, tell her it was okay to be close, that she really did care about the older woman, that she didn't need to be scared of…whatever it was that scared her so much.

She'd decided against it; maybe Regina needed to figure that out herself. But Emma just couldn't stop the conflicting thoughts. She just wanted to make the older woman feel safe with her. Because that's how Regina made Emma feel; safe. She really, really liked Regina but she still felt some kind of ache, some kind of emptiness in her chest and she didn't understand that. She'd thought maybe the sex would bring them closer, and she could feel the love that she craved.

She just didn't understand, her feelings for the older woman were so strong, and so intense but it didn't feel like the same kind of love she'd ever had for friends, for her old boyfriend Neal, it felt different somehow.

Emma awoke with a scream, in such intense pain that her eyes took a moment to adjust to the dark. Regina was crouched over her and she her hand was…in her chest. Magic. Why was Regina using magic? And why against her?

"What are you doing?" Emma gasped, gritting her teeth in pain as her head spun.

Regina's eyes brimmed with tears, "Fixing a mistake," she replied, withdrawing her shaking hand and backing away, watching Emma with wide eyes.