The Boy in the Park
Chapter Thirty
Mebuki Haruno's day began with bright orange glowing paint…in her room. She blinked once, before slowly nudging Kizashi out of his sleep. Her husband blinked and looked at the ceiling, the walls and the windows.
"Did you paint them?" he asked carefully.
"Of course I didn't!" Mebuki hissed back. "In the middle of the night? Oh come on!" she slipped on her negligée, before opening the first drawer for some clothes that hadn't been turned horrendously coloured. She heard a loud bang, and a shower of confetti fell on her. They were sticky confetti, covered in glue. She screamed as she walked away from it, only to trip against a wire at the door and fall body first on a skateboard, which began to head towards the stairs.
Mebuki managed to push herself off it —she wasn't an ex Kunoichi for nothing— before hitting the stairs. She heard the skateboard clang downwards, unleashing more explosions of pastries and whatnot. She blinked in confusion as she finally heard the noises die down. Carefully, a step at a time, she went downstairs to check on the damage.
The kitchen was a mess. The bathroom destroyed, the hall covered in graffiti and whipped cream…it had all the feeling of being a prank but…
But her house had been destroyed. It would take days to get it clean, to repair the damage to the pipes —clogged with what looked like a red sweater…her favourite red sweater.
Pale faced, on the verge of tears, she slowly stumbled to the door and opened it. She hoped that after taking the newspaper everything else would turn out to be a nightmare.
Quietly, she slowly grabbed the paper.
Her hands remained stuck to it as it sizzled, before detonating in a shower of poop and paper confetti.
In that moment, she began to scream incoherently and cry.
"That," Anko said from a building afar, "Is a prank."
Naruko scrunched her face for a moment. "Isn't it…a bit too much?"
"Listen kid," Anko replied. "And learn it well: sometimes, people need the hard lesson to get it to stick. You break a leg, you cave in their nose and they learn not to trouble you any longer."
"But she's still Sakura's mom," Naruko mumbled. "And Aniki's…"
"She broke his arm."
"But she's crying."
"Serves her well then," Anko snapped back. "How's our alibi looking?"
Naruko blinked. "I think…I think we'll be fine on that front," she muttered. "But it doesn't look right to me, this thing. Aniki said to let it be."
"Oh, he'll say that but he'll be happy when he hears about it," Anko replied smoothly. "Everyone enjoys payback."
Naruko fidgeted but said nothing. They returned to their previous 'alibi' location: Aniki's home. They had booby trapped the house during the night, but she had left two Kage Bunshin clones home to act like her and Anko until they returned. So when Aniki woke up, he would be able to claim they had never left the house.
She entered with Anko from her apartment. They slipped out of their 'work' clothes and donned their respective 'sleep' attire. Then carefully —as Aniki was busy cooking breakfast once more— she and saggy tits swapped with their clones, which then dispersed harmlessly in smoke away from sight.
"Yawn…" she yawned as she stood up. "Yum! Aniki!" she stumbled out of bed and proceeded to hug him as he spun around.
"Naruko," he greeted her, "And Anko," he sighed. "I'll need a bigger apartment if you two plan to keep on crashing on my bed."
Really, he couldn't understand why they found it so comfortable. He had taken the sofa last night, but hell if the two of them snored. It was as if they were making that much noise on purpose while sleeping. He shrugged it off and proceeded to set the table.
"Ehi, Naruko? Shouldn't you be off to meet with your teacher?"
Naruko frowned. "I don't like him," she muttered. "He's a damn pervert. He agreed to teach me only when I showed him the Sexy no Jutsu."
"The sexy no Jutsu?" Anko's ears perked up.
"No," he said firmly before Naruko could speak. "If you dare teach Anko that technique, I will withhold ramen from this household henceforth…for eternity."
Naruko swallowed and then furiously nodded.
Anko pouted, her shoulders sagging.
"Naruko? What's his name?" he asked then. He supposed it had to be Jiraiya anyway, but…
"Jiraiya something," Naruko pouted. "He says he's a sannin but he's more of a pervert: he even says so! Stupid Kakashi-sensei…he could have trained me," the girl muttered. "Why did he have to train only Duckbutt…"
He sighed. "Jiraiya of the Sannin is a really strong shinobi, you know? He's way stronger than your sensei."
Naruko kept on pouting.
"Like, he's probably second only to the Hokage…" he feebly added.
"He's a pervert, Aniki! He had me sign a contract with toads —those things are yucky! And then he wants me to bring out one of them, but all I get are tadpoles…"
He blinked.
"Hey brat!" Anko exclaimed then, "Summoning contracts aren't something stupid or yucky! Hell, did you know what you were signing to begin with?"
Naruko looked at Anko with a perplexed expression. That made the Tokubetsu Jounin's head drop slightly.
"When you sign a contract, you can summon them but they can summon you back! And when the holder of the contracts makes you sign one, he's basically taking you on as an apprentice!" the woman sighed. "You have no idea what I'm saying, right?"
"Yep!" Naruko smiled brightly at that.
"Why did I have that impression…"
There was a knock at the door, and he went to open —it was a lost cause to try to 'pilfer' food from the main pot when both Kunoichi were faster and quicker than him, but thankfully rice wasn't something that was lacking in the household.
Household. He actually stopped for a moment to look back at the two girls, who were strangely…not eating? Tense?
Had they actually learned to leave him some side dishes? Was that a miracle?
He then opened the door, and nearly died of a heart attack there and then.
When the Hokage knocks at your door in the early morning…you just know someone's out for your blood.
He swallowed nervously. "Hokage-sama?"
"Jiji!?" Naruko exclaimed from behind him.
"Heya Big Boss!" Anko yelled.
The stern look the old man gave however…why did it seem as if it was to promise pain?
Why?
Author's notes
Could the readers do me a favour? Could you Google 'Mary sue test' and try to compile it with the information of the OC hereby? I've been told he looks and feels Mary Sueish, so I checked it out and I ended up with 10 points. (Until sixteen, it's a normal character that can be spiced up). Since I'm a biased source, if someone would do the same from the 'audience' side I'd be grateful.