100 Years

It was hell on earth and had been for awhile. They were doing well enough at the camp, but they were beginning to run low on a few key supplies -as Chuck knew all too well. Dean's house sat outlined in the evening light, located at the center of the camp so his comrades could find him easily if they needed to. Cas' house was located further away, closer to the edges of wilderness so they could all pretend that the fallen angel's orgies and drugs had always been his drug of choice -never God or faith. Kat's house was shared with Alyssa, as most everyone's was, and located diagonal to Dean's. It was probably a good placement for the both of them, but nowadays it was rough to see either woman.

Since Sam had said yes, Alyssa wasn't coping well. In fact, less than well. She had fallen into depression and only Cas and Kat ever saw her. Dean refused to have anything to do with her since she had failed the only worthwhile task ever assigned her. Saving Sam didn't just end with the seals -it carried well beyond that. And it was easier for Dean to blame Alyssa rather than accept that Sam had given her the slip and confronted Lucifer on his own. Now they were all paying the price. Sometimes, Kat wondered if it wasn't for the best that Alyssa had become so anti-social. If anyone knew, or suspected, what part she played in their nightmare she wouldn't have lasted very long. She was the black spot of failure on their recent history. Dean couldn't even hear her name. Honestly, when Cas lost all of his powers, Kat had been afraid Dean would come to kill her friend but he didn't. She was grateful for it, but at the same time she could feel how Alyssa resented it.

Death would have been easier than living with the guilt, she would say. But she still allowed Kat to look after her. About a year ago Alyssa had been out searching for survivors with some of their merry band when some croats had showed up. No one else had come back other than Alyssa, with her arm broken and no other signs of injury upon her person. Dean put her into quarantine right away and they gave her a week before she was allowed to be examined. Their latest doctor had died in the last fight and so the next qualified person, Dean, was meant to attend to her aid.

"No," he had said coldly, his eyes staring straight into Alyssa's. "Not helping." And he turned and walked away.

So it fell to the next qualified person… until there was no one left but Kat, Cas and Alyssa. They had done what they could, but really, none of them were familiar enough with what to do that the injury never healed correctly. That was the last time Alyssa had tried to help anyone, since no one was willing to help her with Dean's stubborn refusal. Kat wasn't able to change his opinion on the matter either.

"I'm okay for the night Kat," Alyssa told her quietly. "I know you want to go see him. I understand."

It was five years to the day that they found out Sam had said yes, to the day that Dean was resolved to fighting this and being their great and mighty leader in this war. Dean never took a day off, none of them really did. He was spending more and more time with Risa, but Kat knew it didn't mean anything. It never did. He slept around like a man in his twenties, a man that was fighting every day to stay alive. Honestly, it was a wonder between him and Cas how there were any condoms left. And how no one had gotten pregnant.

Prior to this, what felt like another lifetime ago, Kat had enjoyed sleeping around but since the world had fallen apart… She didn't sleep with anyone other than Dean. Sometimes Cas' offer was appealing, but she just didn't have the heart to do it. Dean wouldn't have cared, he wouldn't have tried to stop her and maybe that was the problem -that she wanted him to show her that he cared. But she settled for the nights he would sneak her into his cabin. Those were the best nights. She smiled to herself as she left her cabin, not needing to look behind her to know that Alyssa was sneaking out of bed and making her way unnoticed from the camp.

Tomorrow they were going to attack the Devil and it would be their last stand. No one was saying it out loud, and certainly not Dean but it was clear enough. She stopped at the storage, grabbing a bottle of alcohol before continuing to Dean's. She would go to battle tomorrow, hung over and careless and in love with a man determined to die. And she would die, and he would die, and they would lose but at least they tried. She knocked on his door and was grateful to see that there was no sign of Risa or Jane.

Dean smiled at her tiredly, moving aside to let her in.

"So, tomorrow's the big day huh?" she asked, flashing him a smile.

"Of course you know, yes. It is."

"Want to share a drink with me?" she asked, twisting the cap off.

"Maybe some."

Kat took a drink before passing it to him. "You know Alyssa's gone right?"

She saw the hardness come back into his eyes. "Did she, really?"

"She's going to try and save him."

Dean scoffed, taking a long drink. "She's should've done that five years ago."

"She's going to die Dean!" Kat snapped. "You could at least respect that much."

"Well good for her. We're all going to die, she'll just be someone half way in the middle." He handed the bottle back, turning away from her.

"She's my friend, Dean," Kat protested softly.

"That was your choice."

She stared at her feet for a moment, the silence weighing heavily between them. Of course Dean would never forgive Alyssa's failure -he hadn't forgiven Sam's -and now here they were.

"Dean," she said quietly. "I don't want to spend today fighting. I want to spend it getting drunk and being with you."

"Why don't you just go see Cas?" he asked flippantly, still not looking at her.

If there was anything left of her heart, she would have been surprised as she shrugged the pain away bitterly. "Because I don't want to see him."

"Cas says his drugs are better than any alcohol you can find," he added.

"I don't want to be stoned, Winchester!"

"You just want to be careless enough to die, huh?" he asked dryly, turning to look at her then. "You're supposed to lead them. But you'll barely be functioning so I guess it'll be Risa's job tomorrow."

Kat flinched, biting her suddenly trembling lip. It was too late for tears. She swallowed them back with difficulty. "Then that will be Risa's job."

Silence settled again, heavy and unmoving as Kat fought to control her emotions and to keep herself from lashing out at the man she had once loved. She couldn't definitively say that she still loved him, but she did care about him.

"Why are you still here?" he asked tiredly.

"Because I'm here for you." She smiled wryly, handing him the bottle back.

Dean raised a brow almost skeptically as he took a quick swig. "Did you steal this from supplies again?"

"Yup."

"You know Chuck hates that."

"And Chuck knows that since he published that book that we don't get along," Kat replied with a grin. "A little fear is useful. Besides, it's our last day on earth isn't it? Shouldn't we drink it away and spend the night in each other's arms?"

"If we drink all this, we'll be out cold come morning."

"Good stuff, isn't it?" Kat asked with a grin. "It's not the very best, just second rate, in case we win tomorrow. Got to have something to celebrate with."

"Will there even be anything to celebrate if we won?" he asked quietly. He swallowed a mouth before handing it back to her.

"Sure there will be. We could... celebrate us. Or the blue sky, or the harvest or sex, or something. You know?"

"You sound just like Cas," he laughed.

Kat took a long mouthful that time, feeling the familiar burn down her throat. She sounded nothing like Cas. "Yeah, sure." She handed him the bottle back.

"Any excuse is a good excuse for a drink between the two of you. I'm surprised you don't spend more time with him."

Because if she spent more time with Cas, she would never see Dean. She would fall into a drunken stupor and live there until she died. She didn't care about the goddamn ex-angel. She cared about the broken man in front of her, the one who was too stupid to fall apart and too smart to think that he would win. Tomorrow they would all die, and here they were sitting taking of celebrations that would never come. Here they were, together and yet divided. She leaned over, kissing him carelessly. Here they were, the same as they had always been. Two idiots, one heartsick and the other just three quarters stupid. She had run the first time and now here he was, running away from whatever they might have had. It felt a good deal like someone had cursed them to this stupidity and heartbreak, even as the clothes went flying and the bottle tumbled from its stand.

No one cared, because no one had any energy left to care. But they would try.

And they would fail, and they would die.

The world had already ended. Lucifer was just waiting for the last great stand of humankind. And tomorrow, at sunrise, it would look like humanity's most pitiful and broken crawling their way through a dead city to meet the fallen angel and die at his hands. And there would never be another tomorrow.

Now You're Gone

Alyssa made it problem free to the mansion. There wasn't a croat in sight, which led her to believe that he was prepared for Dean's assault tomorrow. Even as she moved around the side, to the garden she had been dreaming about for what seemed like years, she knew that one of the infected could kill her so easily. But she just… she needed to see him. Not Lucifer, but Sam. And tomorrow the world would either start anew or it would die, with or without her. This would be Dean's battle, tomorrow. But tonight, it was her battle.

She settled on the stone path, following it unarmed to the mansion. She saw him, dressed in a pure white tuxedo, no dirt or blood staining it anywhere. He looked better than she had seen anyone look in years. But then again, this was all façade -this wasn't really Sam. Sam was somewhere inside, screaming and raging in mental exhaustion as Lucifer swallowed the world. Did he even know that the other angels had left? What did he know of them and their plans? Based on how there wasn't a single croat around, she was guessing that he had to have had some inkling that they were coming.

Lucifer walked out of the doors, a flood of infected at his heels, stopping before the door as they stared out at her.

"Why hello," Lucifer said, amusement in his voice as he looked at her. "Can I help you with anything?"

"I want to talk to him," she replied, her voice quaking.

"I'm sorry, he's a bit busy at the moment. Anything else?"

"Please," she asked softly, her voice breaking.

"He doesn't want to talk to you," Lucifer replied gleefully. "You failed him, you know. You wouldn't even come see him -you were too scared. Well, now I'm here and you really have reason for it."

"I was scared for him!" Alyssa cried out, staring into his eyes. She wanted to see the cruelty, the malice and the hatred -she didn't want to see Sam but that was all she could see. He was all… Sam, but he wasn't at the same time. And it was confusing and her heart ached and tears swelled to her eyes. "I failed him and I'm sorry! I want him to know that!" The desperate note in her voice shook and then held, even as the tears rolled down her cheeks.

She thought she had cried herself out ages ago, with her crooked arm and the hatred of everyone in the world on her. No one knew why Sam said yes, whether it was because he gave up or Lucifer forced him to say yes, but they did know that Alyssa was supposed to have been there, was supposed to make him say no and save him from Lucifer in the end. How that would ever crush Lucifer, she had no idea, but that was the idea.

"Is that all?" Lucifer asked coldly, his eyes mirthless and without mercy. It struck a chilling fear in her body, paralyzing her to the spot even as he reached towards her, a smile spreading across his lips.

"Yes," she whispered quietly even as his hand wrapped around her throat.

And for a moment, as she watched his eyes she swore she could see Sam there, fighting a losing battle as the hand around her neck tightened. Sam would never forgive her, of course. She hadn't just failed him, she had failed Dean and the world and her pain and suffering was well-deserved. She didn't need the whispers in the dark of the night to tell her that much.

Alyssa woke up with a gasp, her hand going to her neck where she could swear she still feel the cold fingers of the Devil himself. Death had wrapped her in a cold embrace indeed, splattering her dream into a nightmare painted red with death and hatred. She swallowed tightly, feeling the hatred and fear recede deep within her mind. If she had not been awoken just from a nightmare, she would have realized that she was still dreaming, just a different kind of dream -because her body was asleep on a very uncomfortable couch back in Minnesota and not on this heavenly feather bed.

"You can still save him," drawled an unfamiliar voice.

Alyssa flew into an upright position, casting around in the dark for the source of the speaker. "Wh-what?!"

"You can still save him. He is not so unsaveable as all that. If you are with him in Detroit, when he goes, if you understand him and love him, you will go. If you still fear him, harbor a grudge... he will not be saved. There will be no chance for the earth if you do not go with him, understanding and accepting him."

"Who are you?" she demanded, her voice shaking as she looked around desperately.

"A friend. An enemy. I am many things and yet none. I can see your dreams, your thoughts and your feelings. You are a peculiar human being, Alyssa Jones. Do not be so close-minded out of fear. You will see the Winchesters soon again, so be patient and think on what I have told you. No one can make you feel anything other than what you truly feel, no matter what a voice whispers in the dark of the night..."

Alyssa came to in the half-light of an apartment flat, lying on a stiff and uncomfortable couch, her heart pounding in her chest. Could what she have seen come true? If the voice spoke the truth... what if it was just another dream? She asked herself as she sat up, placing her hand over her heart. It felt too real to be a dream. There was something... eerie about it. She would not dismiss such a sign, much as she would not dismiss Cas' words from her mind. She had failed, yes, but perhaps she still had a chance. And she was afraid of Sam, and hurting, but that was within her right to feel wounded by his words. She should go and see him, talk to him...

Her nature wasn't one that inclined her to run from her feelings. Running away never helped anything, she had learned when she was just a child and scared of the dark. She had fled the darkness until it caught up with her, overwhelmed her and left her in tears but stronger. Whatever frayed and tattered threads kept her friendship to Sam, she did at least owe him a heart-to-heart. They had always been friends, it felt like and although she had feelings towards him it did not mean he was obligated to have those same feelings towards her.

If she followed him to certain death, then she was doing it of her own accord.

A chilling calm washed over her, as the voice of that... man, washed over her once more. No, he could not make her do anything or feel anything, but between him and that dream -Alyssa was quite sure that ignoring it would lead her to that very same place. She exhaled several times before resigning herself to restlessness as she rose to her feet and made a strong cup of tea. She needed a lot of time to figure a few things out. It was just a dream at least. A dream that she never wanted to see come to pass.

Absently, she rubbed her arm -good and whole, useful, not dangling limply at her side. She looked at her phone, considering sending a message to Kat before deciding against it. The other woman had been busy lately, helping out with Bobby and some hunters that were being more rowdy than usual. Alyssa sighed shakily. It was just a dream, she told herself fervently. Just a nightmare.