Chapter 22.

AN: Shut the f*** up! Preps stop flaming, okay, if you don't like it, f*** off! I know it's Mr. Norris, it's Raven's fault, okay! You suck! No, just kissing Raven you ****ing rock, preps suck!

No, no, it's Filch and Ms. Norris. It's not that hard! Also, why are you blaming things on Raven and then kissing her? I'm sure Raven would object to this.

All day everyone talked about the Ministry of Magic. Well anyway, I woke up the next day. I was in my coffin so I opened the door. I was wearing black lacy leather pajamas. Then I gasped.
Standing in front of me were…. Bloody Mary, Vampire, Diabolo, Draco, Dracula and Willow!

I thought guys couldn't get into the girl dorms? Do sparkly Vampire/Fairies/Edward Cullen things count as male?

I opened my crimson eyes.

Ah, opening your eyes when you're already looking around while describing an eye colour. The only other thing Ebony can do is wear an "I'm a Mary Sue" t-shirt. With lace and leather, of course. You forgot the corset stuff! What would Ebony say? …Actually, she'd probably call you 'goffic'. Then you'd run over to my house for shelter.

Willow was wearing a tight black leather top with pictures of bloody roses all over it. Under that she wart a black poufy skirt with lace on it and black gothic boots that was attached to the top.

Her boots were attached to her shirt?! What?! Erg, corset and ballet tutu look. *cringe* I'm sorry, but nothing can make that look dignified. Tutu's and leotards are alright, but tutus and corsets are not. Actually, corsets are never good.

Vampire was wearing a baggy Simple Plan t-shirt and baggy black pants and Vans. Draco was wearing a black MCR t-shirt and black jeans and a leather jacket. He looked just like Gerard Way, and almost as ****ing sexy. Vampire looked like Joel Madden. Bloody Mary was wearing a tight black poufy gothic dress that she had ripped so it showed off all of her cleavage with a white apron that said '**tch' and other swear words and MCR lyrics on it kind of like one dress I had seen Amy Lee wear once. Darkness (who is Jenny) was there too.

WHO THE **** IS JENNY?!(*# &$*#& euhriuwehfuhf Jenny? What? What's happening?

Why is she showing 'all of her cleavage'? Isn't that like going around without a shirt? Or going around with your breasts poking out of a giant hole in your top? Has anyone at Hogwarts heard of a dress code?! Also, why an apron? Is she cooking something? Helping traumatized house elves with the chores?

She was wearing a ripped gothic black dress with ripped stuff all over it and a lace-up top thing and black pointy boots. So were Crabbe and Goyle.

Nice clothing choices, Crabbe and Goyle .Is the aforesaid 'ripped stuff' stapled to her dress? That must be uncomfortable…

Poor Crabbe and Goyle… Darkness/mystery girl is making them wear dresses.

It turns out that Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle's dad was a vampire. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists with a razor. He had raped them and stuff before too. They all got so depressed that they became gothic and converted to Satanism.

1. Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle's dad are vampires. They combined into one person (power rangers!) and raped some random mystery people. They stuffed them with stuffing. They got depressed, converted to Satanism, turned gothic, and then slit their wrists. Or should it be his wrists? They are now one person…

2. Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle's dad are vampires. They combined into one person (power rangers!) and raped themselves. They stuffed themselves with stuffing. They got depressed, converted to Satanism, turned gothic, and then slit their wrists.

3. The fathers of Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle are vampires. They raped their children, stuffed them and then committed suicide. The children then became depressed, gothic, vampire Satanists.

4. The father of Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle is a vampire. He killed himself. His ghost then raped his children and stuffed them with stuffing. His kids became depressed, vampire, gothic Satanists.

5. I'm so tired of this paragraph… Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle's dad are vampires. They combined into one person (power rangers!) They committed suicide, turned into ghosts, raped who knows what, stuffed who knows what and then scarred their children for life. That's it! That's all I'm doing! 5 choices are enough!

6. But I do love a nice, even number so Darkness, Diabolo, Crabbe and Goyle's dad are vampires. They combined into one person (power rangers!), killed themselves, raped themselves and stuffed themselves. Their kids became black wearing, Satan loving vampires. *pant pant pant*

Surprise, surprise .So tired…
"Oh my ****ing G*d!" I yielded as I jumped up. "Why the f*** are u all here?"

What are you yielding to? Are you yelling?

"Ebony, something is really ****ed up," Draco said.
"OK but I need to put my ****ing clothes on first," I shouted angrily.

Aren't you wearing clothes already?

"It's all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. You're so ****ing beautiful," Draco said in a sexy voice.
"Oh all right," I said with a smile. "But you have to tell me why you're being all secretive."
"I will, I will," he said.
So I just put on some black eyeliner, black lipstick and red eye shadow and white foundation. Then I came.

WAIT DID YOU JUST WALK OUTSIDE NAKED! Uuuuuuuudiouyrre948y03ewjif[ohr]

U=E

SHE'S GOING TO FREEZE! DRESS CODE! DRESS CODE!

We all went outside the Great Hall and looked out a window.

Edited Out: Ebony and co. looking out a widow

A ****ing prep called Britney from Gryffindor was standing next to us. She was wearing a pink mini and a Hilary Duff t-shirt so we put up our middle fingers at her.

What did she do to you? That's clothist! Is that a word? It is now.

Inside the Great Hall we could see Dumbledore. Cornelius Fudge was there shouting at Dumbledore. Doris Umbridge was there too.

Edited Out: Our good friend RumBridge and Cornelia Fudge

"This cannot be!" she shouted angrily. "The school must be closed!"
"The dark lord is planning on killing the students!" yelled Cornelius Fudge.
"You are not fit to be the principal any longer!" yelled Umbridge. "You are too old and your Alzheimer's is dangerous! You must retire or Voldemort will kill your students!"

Since when is Alzheimer's contagious? How do they know Voldemort's plans? Are they in league with him, or is this more Tara shit? Do you want to close the school or retire Dumbledore? It's a bit silly to do both at the same time…

Edited Out: Obsessive caps lock

"Very well," Dumbledore said angrily. "But we cannot do this. We can't close the school. There is only one person who is capable of killing Voldemort and she is in the school. And her name is Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way."

*Facedesk* Poor Harry is feeling unloved…

Draco, Crabbe, Goyle, Darkness, Willow, Vampire and Bloody Mary looked at each other…I gasped.

Tara will not have the last word. I officially claim the last word. It's my precious.