The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Six

"I was expecting you, Mister Haruno," Hiashi said creepily, turning his chair to face Shinku while holding a white fluffy cat in his lap, and gently caressing him.

Shinku looked to the side, where Neji was standing tall and with a rock face, his arms behind his straightened back.

"Or should I call you sensei?" Hiashi drawled out.

"Ehm…is something the matter, Hyuga-san?" Shinku began to sweat.

"Is something the matter, he says," Hiashi drawled. "Explain to me one thing, Mister Haruno…did you truly think I would not find out?"

"In my defence, she began all by herself," Shinku said quickly, understanding where they were headed.

"Oh? And you just let it go, didn't you?"

"Well, she's a bit difficult to say no to," he acquiesced. "She was saddled on to me after all."

"Saddled?" Hiashi's brain brought up a mental image he quickly squashed. "Is that a new term?"

"Well, hoisted maybe?"

Another horrible mental image soon removed by his brain cells.

"Hoisted?" Hiashi's voice cracked. "Is her…purity still safe?"

"I don't think so, what with the way she acts now…really makes you wonder how she learned all that so fast without practicing."

Hiashi smiled.

Neji took a few steps back.

"Mister Haruno," Hiashi said. "You will take responsibility, yes?"

"Ehm…I think the responsibility is on Naruko actually."

"The Uzumaki…girl?" Hiashi brought up another mental image. That one floated around for a few more minutes, before he firmly tore it apart. "Your charge?"

"Well, she's a Chuunin now, she can take care of herself," and it was Naruko's fault that Hinata had turned for the worse, there was no doubting it even for an instant.

And Naruko had better chances of escaping Hiashi's wrath than him, that much was true too.

"Still, the one she appears to be infatuated with is you," Hiashi remarked.

"That's only a front, she told me it's all a way to get closer to Naruko and have a family with her."

"And HOW IN- ahem—" Hiashi coughed, "How exactly would that be possible?"

"She said something about adopting," Shinku replied.

Hiashi closed his eyes. He nodded firmly. "Ah, I see. The Byakugan does not lie…you are telling the truth."

He opened them again. "Still, you are responsible for your charge's actions as her guardian."

Shinku swallowed noisily. Where was his Anbu guard when he needed it?

"Looking for someone?" Hiashi said then with a smile, pushing a button on his desk. A corner of the room suddenly turned, revealing Yugao Uzuki tied to a rope, dangling atop a pool of acid that was actually bubbling.

"You know that's a crime," Shinku deadpanned.

"Uh? It's not a crime, just clan business," Hiashi retorted making a knowing nod and laughing madly. "A father's love is never a crime!"

"As expected from Hiashi-sama!" Neji exclaimed, laughing next in a falsetto tone.

Shinku sweat-dropped.

Yugao actually coughed politely. "I am being paid to enact this scene to scare you, Haruno-san. You have nothing to fear. This is just green tea... boiling green tea."

"Silence!" Hiashi exclaimed, "Don't ruin my moment!"

"Wait, this is all a practiced play?"

"No! I mean, yes, of course it is!" Hiashi exclaimed nodding furiously. "If it weren't, how could I convince the Anbu to look the other way while I menacingly castrate you?"

"What?" Shinku began to take careful steps backwards.

"Now, now! No leaving! Neji!" Hiashi barked, "Are the tools ready!?"

"Hai, Hiashi-sama!" Neji disappeared in a flicker, returning with a pair of evil-looking red-hot giant scissors.

"Are you sure this is just a play?" Shinku mouthed towards Yugao, who just gave an affirmative nod.

"Of course, how could they possibly lie to an experience Anbu such as myself?"

Somewhat, that didn't console him at all. Especially because the 'green tea' wasn't only sizzling, but also because a fly that had flown inside wasn't coming out.

"Ehm," Shinku coughed. "Can't we reach a discussion like men?"

"Why, Mister Haruno? Soon you will be Miss Haruno after all," Hiashi laughed. "Think positive: a Hyuga never hits a girl."

"Just out of curiosity, when does the play end?" he asked then.

"After the castration has been successful of course!" Hiashi cackled madly. "Let the Castratekrieg begin!"

Neji's eyes shone for a moment as he grabbed the scissors.

Shinku exhaled. "Very well," he sighed. "I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice," he closed his eyes. He breathed in deeply just as Neji began to walk closer to his important 'bits'.

"I think I'd like to get married."

The wall broke to smithereens a few seconds later, as Neji slammed against the opposite wall with needles pinning him down.

Shizune walked in laughing awkwardly. "Ah, I was just passing by and I heard the funniest of things!" Shizune exclaimed clapping her hands. "As a single woman in the prime of her age, I wonder if there is any young and equally exciting stud who'd like to—"

"This is preposterous!" Hiashi yelled. "What of the guards outside!?"

"Uhm?" Shizune cocked her head to the side. "What guards?"

Hiashi looked out of the wall, holding on to Mr. Fluff. All the castration squad members had needles pinning them down or paralyzing them into sleep.

"Preposterous! How could you do this!? My castration squad! My pride and joy!"

Tears fell down Hiashi's face. "You monster!"

"No force is strong enough to stand between a single woman nearing her fourt—ahem, her twenties and a husband!" Shizune exclaimed loudly.

Shinku's eyes dropped to a half-closed state, as he then turned to gaze towards the Anbu.

"Get me out of here," he mouthed.

"All right," Yugao nodded. "The play is over I suppose."

The next instant, he was brought back in front of his house.

Shizune spun around as fast as she could, but she missed the Anbu and her ticket out of being a lonely hag with a bunch of cats.

She gasped.

"That…THAT THIEVING BITCH!" Shizune wailed. "THAT WAS MY FUTURE-HUSBAND! ARGH!" screaming, Shizune disappeared too.

Hiashi looked towards Neji.

Neji looked towards Hiashi.

"Uncle…women are scary."

"Indeed nephew, they are."

The door of the studio then slid open, as Hinata walked in with a happy smile plastered on her face.

"I heard something funny going on in here about Aniki-san."

The wails and the screams of the two Hyuga males continued way into the dawn.

Author's notes

My hands have begun to hurt like crazy towards the night/morning period. Which is why to even write this was excruciating. I think it's a matter of the weather…because really, Arthritis so young seems preposterous. (I'm in my twenties).