"Alright, well," Nico began as they paced around the deck of the Argo II, "there's some stuff I need your help with if we're going to do this right." He wondered if summoning her ghost would really be a good idea, or if it would just hurt Leo even more. 'No, he's right. He deserves a chance to say goodbye. You did with Bianca,' he reminded himself.

"Okay, sure," Leo answered, but his voice was small and shaky. He wanted to cry, but in front of Nico? That was just plain embarrassing. So instead, he just did his best to mask his emotions and continue with the conversation normally.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Nico asked, immediately seeing through it.

"Of course I am," he answered a bit too fast, eyes quickly filling with tears. Hurriedly, he looked away and wiped them on his sleeve. "Just tell me what you need me to do. I'm—I'll be fine."

"Leo…" Nico frowned. He felt guilty for putting his friend through this, even if it was something that needed to be done, something Leo himself had agreed to. Why did his powers only ever seem to make people unhappy? Why couldn't he be like the other demigods, whose abilities made them more likable and more helpful?

"Geez, kid," Leo muttered, forcing a smile, "I already said I'd be fine. So what is it that you need?" He tried to sound more sure of himself, but his mind was elsewhere. How do you even begin to prepare yourself to see the ghost of your dead mother?

"Well, it helps if I know a bit about her, and a bit about you," Nico explained. "Simple things about her life—who she was, how she died, favorite foods. Anything about your life that might be relevant, too, I guess."

Although knowing those things did make summoning spirits easier, the real reason Nico was asking was simply the fact that he was curious. He wondered to himself, who was Esperanza Valdez? And, more importantly… who was Leo Valdez? It seemed like the more Nico got to know this guy, the more of a mystery he became, and Nico was never a fan of mysteries, considering how much of his life was one already.

"Oh, okay," Leo was fighting down a quaver in his voice again. He wasn't sure if he could speak about his mom without totally falling apart—like a poorly-made machine, one that was just short of the breaking point. "Wait, favorite foods?" In spite of himself, he raised a brow. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"…Not important yet," was all Nico had to say in response. "Just talk."

Leo nodded, then cleared his throat. "She… She grew up in Houston, Texas. She worked in a mechanics shop… I guess that's how Dad fell in love with her. Figures." He almost smiled, but it quickly faded. "If you think I'm good with machines, you should've seen what she could do."

Nico just nodded encouragingly, his expression beckoning him to speak more.

"Anyway, we spent a lot of time down there at the shop—it was a little creepy. I was never a big fan of the dark when I was young, y'know? But with my mom there, I didn't really care." Memories came flooding back, and with them, a sudden jolt of emotion. He winced as if those thoughts hurt him, and for a moment Nico looked concerned.

"Uh, are you—" Nico began to ask, when Leo nodded.

"Yeah, I'm good," he cut him off, before sighing and continuing to speak. "We were at the store late one night. I was hanging out like I always did, while she worked hard on a patent for a new drill bit—the thing was genius, by the way—and uh…" His voice faltered. "Y'know. Gaea visits… stuff happens."

"Stuff?" Nico was astounded at Leo's ability to totally and completely sum up his own mother's death as 'stuff happening,' but he wasn't about to blame him. If this was the way he dealt with hardship, so be it. Nico would listen, no matter what words Leo decided on using.

Leo's expression faltered. "I… I did it. It was all my fault."

"Did what…?" Nico asked, though he was a bit afraid to hear the answer. He got chills up his spine—either from the chilly air outside, or the fact that he knew he was about to hear the tale of someone's death.

"Gaea—I saw her and I freaked, I thought my mom was in danger, I just wanted to keep her safe and I…" Leo choked on his words. "I killed her, Nico!" His voice rang out, loud enough to hang in the atmosphere for a moment. "It was me—I burnt the warehouse down. I killed her… Everything… Everything is my fault." He stops for a second and silence drops in the air like a bomb.

These were things he hadn't said or even thought about for ages, after being with Jason and Piper. They told him over and over like broken records—it wasn't his fault, it was Gaea's. She was messing with him. So he just went along with it. Sure, why not? Nothing's his fault, right? It might've been his fire, and his entire family might have blamed him, and it was he who spent his time running away—but this was all Gaea, wasn't it? That earth goddess, who seemed to disappear as soon as the whole ordeal was over. Did they really expect him to believe it?

He wanted to believe them. He wanted to leave the past behind, like old technology left when something newer, better, and more reliable comes along. But he couldn't. Each time he used his powers, the same rush of energy filled him—the same one that killed his mother. And sometimes, he couldn't help but think that maybe it was his fault.

Nico, however, wasn't going to take this. He'd sat and listened through the entire story, and now it was his chance to speak. "Leo, do me a favor. Shut up."

"What?"

"Are you crazy?" He felt angry. As a child of Hades, he knew how important it was to keep his temper under control. But he couldn't help it. He wasn't angry at Leo—in fact, he wasn't exactly sure what he was angry at. Maybe just the world, for damning all demigods to such tragic fates. Yes, that was it. The world itself—and it wasn't a what, it was a who.

Gaea was who he was angry at.

"Leo, look at yourself. You, single-handedly, are manning the Argo II. And it deserves the name, too, because this ship is nothing short of the original Argo. You've come this far. Are you really going to blame yourself, and continue to blame yourself, and drive yourself insane over something that wasn't even your fault? This is who we are. We are demigods, Leo. Nothing's ever going to be happy for any of us, but that doesn't mean it's your fault." Nico's tone was bitter, but hearing power in his voice was oddly reassuring to Leo. "You know, holding grudges is a fatal flaw of Hades children. I got that under control a while ago—maybe you should take a lesson from me. Stop holding a grudge against yourself. I won't have it."

At this point, Leo's emotions were everywhere. He didn't know whether to feel sad and sorry for himself, or to get angry at Gaea, or if he should be glad to have a friend like Nico. For a moment, he let himself feel all three.

Nico's words were harsh and his eyes were intense as he spoke them, like they were full of a fire so hot that Leo's own powers could never compare. But what he was saying was probably the most sincere thing Leo had ever heard him say.

He struggled to say something, say anything. But when he opened his mouth, no words came to him. Instead, he just cried silently, tear droplets hitting the deck of his own ship.

"Hey…" Nico put a hand on Leo's shoulder, anger totally drained along with his energy. He was never comfortable with being near other people, but if there was one person on earth who needed a hug at that moment, it was probably Leo Valdez, Supreme Commander of the Argo II. With a soft sigh, the younger demigod gave in and—very awkwardly and hesitantly—put an arm around the other. "It's okay."

Leo wanted to thank him, to crack a joke or say anything, but words still caught in his throat. He resorted to nodding, which Nico understood.

With everything that had happened already, it was hard to believe it was only about two three hours into the night. Waking up suddenly felt like a forever ago. It was eleven o'clock, latest. "I'll take you back to your room. You should sleep for an hour or so, I'll wake you if I need you. We've got a long night ahead of us."

Even if he was fairly certain he wouldn't be able to close his eyes, let alone fall asleep, Leo nodded again, for lack of some better response. He couldn't seem to stop crying, but Nico didn't seem to notice—or at least, he didn't say anything when Leo reached up to wipe tears from his eyes.

Silence hung in the air as the two arrived at the door of Leo's bunk, but it wasn't a tense silence. It was calming, almost soothing, compared to the hectic night they'd endured so far. "Sleep well," was all Nico said, before backing out of the room, leaving Leo alone on the bed.

Finally, just before Nico shuts the door behind him, Leo finds his voice. But what he said stumps Nico more than anything he'd said the entire night. "Apple cider."

Unsure of whether to laugh or be concerned, Nico just shakes his head, wondering if he heard him correctly. "What…?"

"Apple cider. You asked for favorite foods. She loved apple cider."