REQUIEM
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE:
WE ALL PAY DEARLY
November 23, 2185
1405 hours.
Medical Bay, Normandy-Class Stealth Frigate Normandy SR-2, In Orbit over Terra Nova, Asgard System.
Commander Marcus Lee Shepard, Chief Engineer Tali'Shepard vas Normandy, Chief Medical Officer Karin Chakwas, Fleet Admiral Steven Hackett.
The floor was all he looked at as he sat there on the edge of the bed, barely registering the aching wound in his side that Chakwas had patched up, the sterile white walls that surrounded him only serving to remind him of Project Base, and what he had only done just a day ago. Only yesterday had I destroyed an entire solar system. Aratoht, the Alpha Relay, Project Base; all of it is gone. Nothing left. Not even graves for the three hundred thousand I vaporized. I wonder, were their deaths truly quick and painless? What did the destruction of a mass relay feel like and look like, in the end?
He remembered the two Reapers who had come through just before its destruction, Desolation and Primal. Three Hundred Thousand died, and all he seemed to get out of it was delaying the inevitable and killing two Reapers out of an undoubtably large fleet of hundreds, possibly thousands more. He had only made a dent. But it shows they can be killed. We destroyed one Reaper with conventional weapons, another in its infancy, and two more by blowing up their own tech. They can be defeated.
Gods can die.
The thought was full of spite, intended to remind himself that they weren't the synthetic gods they believed themselves to be, but just another killable species. One that can be wiped out like all the rest; you just need to know how.
Something squeezed his left hand, and he was broken away from his reverie, turning towards his wife, who stood beside him, also waiting for Hackett to finish talking with Chakwas outside, the quarian holding his hand with one, and using the other to gently caress it, reassuring him. He smiled weakly, but he did not deserve it. Not now. Not so soon. He remembered last night; how he had wept for what felt like hours in her lap, listening to her soothing gestures and trying to calm himself down, but the effects of what he had done had hit him too hard. He hadn't slept well that night either, the voices of the dead haunting him.
And Ashley, as she seemed to do alot now, joined them.
But what had happened them had happened, and all he could do was wait.
The Alpha Relay jump had taken them directly to the Asgard System for whatever reason, and they now waited patiently in orbit of Terra Nova. Marcus could almost feel the irony in the location, and remembered Asteroid X57 and what Balak had intended to do with it. Seem like such a hypocrite now. Stopped Balak from slamming an asteroid into Terra Nova and murdering millions, and now I've just slammed an asteroid into a mass relay, and wiped out an entire system full of batarians. I don't know whether that's karma, or irony, or both.
Either way, they had waited there, and as soon as Marcus was able, he had dragged himself from his cabin, trying to act as professional and composed as possible, and had contacted Hackett, informing him of what happened; to the very last detail. The Admiral's response hadn't been angry or clipped, it had simply informed him that he was to hold orbit over Terra Nova. He had then gone on to say that he would be taking his flagship, the McKinley, to rendevouz with the Normandy there, and meet Marcus in person. The commander had reluctantly agreed, deciding that discussing such matters over the comm wasn't a good idea, and best discussed in person.
Eventually, he had been forced to come here, as the medi-gel had worn off, and the single gunshot in his side had begun bleeding and stinging again. So, as soon as possible, Chakwas had removed it and patched him up, and just when the McKinley had arrived in system. He ordered Joker to dock with the dreadnought, and before he knew it, Hackett was at his door, Chakwas discussing his condition; not the gunshot, but his mental capacity.
By all rights, I should have gone insane with grief by now, he thought, turning to eye Tali and only allowing a small, half a second smile before turning away, eying the floor once more, I'm lucky to have such a supporting wife to comfort me. I wouldn't have been here without her. Shit, I probably have picked up my pistol and...and...
He didn't want to think about what could have happened. There was too many variables to consider in an argument like that. But he couldn't ignore the feelings that coursed through him; the need to end his torment. But I don't deserve that. I'm not going to take the coward's way out. I'll face the music if I have to.
Before he knew it, the door to the med bay shot open, and both his and Tali's gazes shot to the doorway, watching as Hackett inside, Chakwas walking away, whilst giving him a momentary look of worry, before taking off. Must have been about the incident in the CIC. I'd swear, I've never seen someone look so terrified to even be near me before. And Garrus still hasn't managed to recover my helmet from the wall; wedged too deep, he said.
The door quickly closed, and the Alliance Admiral stopped for a second, eying Marcus and then Tali, managing to gain all the intel he'd need on them by just giving them a split-second gaze; a testament to the man's age and experience. He stood as he customarily did, hands clasped behind his back, wearing his navy blue alliance uniform, the bars of a Fleet Admiral pinned on his left breast. He wore his officer's cap, the alliance insignia slapped ontop. And his face still sported the same white beard and grizzled face he always had. He hadn't changed a bit; of course, he had known that from the minute he contacted him about the Aratoht mission to begin with.
He turned to Marcus and finally gained the courage to approach, that or simple necessity willed him on and he came to a stop just infront of him, eyes meeting his own. He grunted, a tiny smirk creasing at the corner of his lips, "I see you've recovered," he turned to Tali, holding out his hand as he did, "Miss Zorah, a pleasure."
"Actually, its Mrs. Shepard now," Tali corrected, taking his hand and shaking it with a reluctant smile, the events of yesterday still holding on to her thoughts, "We're officially married. And is a pleasure to see you again, Admiral."
"Please, its just Hackett. You aren't Alliance military; I don't expect you to start following regulations like the regular jarhead," he joked, showing that the hardass admiral had a sense of humor. He turned back to Marcus, his smile growing, "And glad to see you finally got married. Noone, especially you, deserves to face what you do alone."
"Thank you Admiral," Marcus replied, but didn't feel the gratitude as his face remained solemn, his eyes fixed on Hackett's, "I wish I deserved it."
Tali immediately turned to face him, and Hackett merely nodded, hands clasping behind his back once more as he shook his head, "I heard your report, Shepard. Damn it, its sounded like hell down there. How are you feeling?"
"Honestly?" Marcus asked incredulously, laughing mirthlessly for a moment as he shook his head, scratching the back of his neck, "Like I just went into an airport and murdered everyone inside, that's how I'm bloody feeling." He didn't mean to add the last bit of anger at the end, but to be honest, he was feeling all that great at the moment, and right now, Hackett's question just felt rhetorical.
Hackett was unfazed, "I can't imagine what you're feeling. On the way here, I couldn't help but feel this was my fault for dumping this on your shoulders. You had enough to deal with but what you went through..." he eyed Tali, and he saw the look in his eyes. Marcus immediately straightened up and shook his head, drawing back Hackett's gaze.
"No, Tali stays. I've already told her what happens, and I trust her to keep what's said in here secret," he informed him, some confidence reentering his posture as he eyed the admiral.
"Very well then. I trust your judgment, and your wife's," he sighed, scratching the area under his eyes as he tried to form words. Finally, he looked back, eyes full of indecision, "Shepard...when I contacted you, I was requesting you go down onto Aratoht, alone, to rescue a chief scientist, Amanda Kenson, to help stop the Reapers. I knew it was of interest to you, and that we needed to get her out of there to avert a full-scale war between us and the Hegemony," he licked his lips, biting down on his lower lip before he spoke again, "So tell me...how the hell did that lead to destroying a mass relay, wiping a batarian solar system from existence, and murdering three hundred thousand?"
He heard the shock and annoyance in his tone, and Marcus couldn't blame him, but he couldn't help but feel the need to explain himself. Tali saw otherwise though as she leaned in defensively, "Excuse me? I won't stand here and watch you speak to my husband like that," she hissed, leaning in to be inches from his face as her eyes narrowed, "Marcus just saved the entire galaxy from a Reaper invasion. We were seconds from watching the galaxy burn when he saved it. He did what was necessary to save us all, so you'll show him the respect he deserves. He's already tearing himself apart over it," she pointed at him, not even looking at him as she did, "I will not let you feed his already overflowing doubt of himself!"
"Tali," he said softly, grabbing her arm and drawing her attention, "Its okay, Hackett meant nothing by it. He's just shocked, that's all."
She looked between them before moving away from Hackett, sighing heavily as she moved to stand at Marcus' side once more, apologizing, "I'm sorry, Hackett. That...I stepped out of line."
"To be honest, I think I deserved that. My approach was blunt," he replied, reassuring her before turning back to Marcus, "So, what happened Shepard?"
He sat there and explained everything. Landing alone on Aratoht and rescuing Kenson, getting her to Project Base as planned. How Kenson turned out to be indoctrinated along with the entire battalion of marines and how they betrayed him and sedated him for six days straight. He explained the battle that followed, the decision he was forced into meeting, and those last fifteen seconds before the asteroid collided with the Alpha Relay, destroying it and the Bahak System, along with two Reapers and a batarian cruiser. By the time he was finished, Hackett had one arm crossed along his chest, another stroking his beard. He merely stood there, absorbing the information, trying to comprehend it.
When he finally did, four minutes later, he broke the tense silence, speaking as he did, "So...Amanda...she was...indoctrinated? A servant of the Reapers?"
He nodded, solemnly, "She was too far gone. She didn't believe in stopping the invasion, and almost let it happen, if I hadn't stopped her, with my team's help. She thought the Reapers 'were a blessing', and I'm absolutely certain Harbinger was pulling her strings like she was some kind of puppet. In the end, she blew herself up, almost killing Tali. I'm sorry Hackett; were you two close?"
He sighed, shaking his head and waving a dismissive hand as his arms fell to his side, "No, she was just...a friend. When she told me of what she'd found, I had immediately authorized it with the Parliament's permission on the grounds of it being top secret. We graduated out of Arcturus University together. We've been...friends a long time. Its just...hard to believe she's gone. I hope she rests in peace; and that those Reaper bastards paid for what they did to her and her team."
"He will sir," Marcus stated with confidence, almost forgetting his current ordeal. I will make Harbinger and all the rest pay for all the people I've lost. Good people. No, I won't watch anyone else die. I will kill Harbinger myself, if I must. He will not hurt anyone else. He knew deep down that that was a promise that couldn't be kept.
Hackett nodded, "And you're absolutely sure this invasion was a threat? I know what I said about it being imminent, but it was literal? Kenson wasn't lying?"
"No," the spectre replied, looking at the ground, "We literally had seconds to spare, Hackett. Seconds."
"A scary situation if there ever was one," the admiral replied in understanding, and he inhaled, exhaling as he spoke once more, "I won't lie to you Shepard, what you did pissed off alot of people. And by alot, I mean the entire galaxy is now in on this, one way or another."
To his surprise, it was Tali who spoke first, "How...how bad is it?"
He gave her a sorrowful look as he brought up his own omni-tool, the list spreading along on the holographic interface on his wrist, "Let's just say that the Council is, quote on quote 'horrified', by hearing about the event, and Councilor Udina is having a hard time settling down the other councilors. Shepard, I hate to say it, but from what I heard, they were demanding the accused brought forward for C-Sec to arrest."
The list didn't stop, either. Hackett just kept on going.
"The Parliament is up in arms about this, but they're fairly divided," he stated, "They all know who was behind it, Commander. One side thinks you're humanity's hero, and that you're nothing but a poster child to them. The other half wants you apprehended and taken back to Earth for imprisonment until they can decide what sentence to dish out. And then comes the last people we wanted to get wind of this: The Batarians."
"Spill it Hackett," Marcus immediately stated, gulping hard as both himself and his wife waited for what was sure to be pretty bad news, "What's the worst of it?"
He eyed him with caution before speaking, "They're...to put it mildly Shepard, they're demanding your head delivered to Khar'Shan. They seem to know that the Alliance was behind this 'unprovoked genocide' on one of their systems, and they're threatening all-out war with Earth if you're not handed over into their custody, where proper justice can be served. We all know what 'proper justice served' means to the batarians, Shepard."
"Execution," Marcus replied, "I'm well aware."
The news should have been shocking, but he had known it was coming. By now, his name would be all over the news and CNN, and he had no doubt that every member of his species was either disgusted by him, or fully supporting him. Hell, the Terra Firma Party would no doubt be asking him soon to be their poster boy for their commercials and political campaigns. It still pained him to know that he would now be the main goal for a galactic manhunt lead by batarians, but it didn't deminish the fact that he had seen it coming.
Tali moved forward in an instant, "I hope the Alliance isn't actually considering giving into their demands."
Hackett scoffed, "What, and give up their greatest icon and reveal him to be a murderous tyrant in the media's eyes? Definitely not. But the flak is getting heated. Some of the Parliament want to hand you over, but be rest assured, the majority supports not handing you over. They won't sit by and watch humanity's greatest champion be executed by the species that hates us the most, guilty or not."
"If only people knew why I truly did it," he shook his head, looking up at Tali and Marcus as he jumped down from the medical bed, hissing at the pain that shot up his side, but he persevered, meeting the admiral's eyes, "But of course, noone believes me. Noone but Kenson. And all her evidence has died with her."
"Indeed," Hackett deactivated his omni-tool, dropping his hands back to his side, "There's another thing you should know. The Council has begun talks and are...well, they're thinking about revoking your Spectre status. They see you as a terrorist threat and want to mitigate the political impact on their own image by disowning you so that they can better claim that they had nothing to do with you."
Back-stabbing pieces of shit. Watching out for themselves, fucking cowards. I bet Udina helped 'em with that decision. I wonder what Anderson must be feeling; surely he must have heard about this by now. And mum...damn it, did she hear it too? Fuck. If only they all knew what really happened...what I heard...
"Let them take it," he felt himself speak, "They can fucking have it. I will not continue to disgrace myself by being affiliated to a bunch of fucking cowards, back-stabbing cunts and political ass-wipers like Udina. I hope the Reapers kill them first. Then they can claim they don't exist as they're turned into husks."
Hackett watched him with barely noticable shock, and Tali looked at him as if he was some kind of monster, "Marcus...don't say that! They be idiots, but noone deserves to die like that, not even the Council!"
She's right. What I said...that isn't like me. Why did I even say that? I shouldn't let anger get to me like that.
"I'm sorry, I'm just...damn it..." he tried to walk into the middle of the bay, and his wound only stung more. But he could feel it slowly regenerating, if only very slowly. He stopped, Tali moving to help him, but he waved her off, the spectre turning back towards Hackett and standing straighter than before, trying to return to the soldier he was. Soldiers don't feel remorse. They kill because they're ordered too. They don't feel pain, and right now, that's the last thing I want to feel. Pain.
Hackett hesitantly moved forward, and Marcus suddenly noticed the indecision once again appearing in his eyes. He hasn't told me everything. He's hiding something. But he was a soldier. He didn't ask questions or demand to be told things. He waited for them. And Hackett delivered, the words coming out of his mouth being hesitant and treading lightly; obviously what he had to say was delicate.
"Shepard...you did what you did with the best intentions, and I believe you about the Reapers. Anderson too. And I'm sure your mother is out there, rooting for you, even if Admiral Arefyev keeps trying to whip her into shape," he gulped, as if his throat was dry and he spoke once again, his eyes full of tension, "But three hundered thousand batarians are dead. All of them, vaporized into ashes, and not even that. The batarians want answers, and the Alliance can't just let you continue to fly your merry way without some form of punishment," He stopped, unable to say the rest, as if choking on the words. Just say it damn you. I need to know. What else...?
"Shepard..." Hackett spoke again, meeting his eyes once more, "Debriefing you wasn't the only reason I came here with the McKinley." What?
"What else did you come here for, sir?"
Hackett sighed, "I'm sorry about this Shepard," he replied, nodding absentmindedly, as if agreeing that what he was about to do was for the greater good, and his own, "But under the juristiction of the Systems Alliance military, and with the powers invested in me by the Arcturus Parliament, I, Fleet Admiral Steven Hackett, hereby ask you to accompany me to Arcturus Station, where you will be placed under arrest and incarcerated until a specified time at which a legal attorney can be acquired for you, and when a date for your trial will be decided. From Arcturus, you will be taken to Earth, city of which is to be left up to the Parliament to decide. Are you willing to cooperate, or is lethal force needed?"
Marcus stood there, shocked for the small part, and by Tali's gasp, he knew she was surprised as well, and felt her eyes on him, waiting for his reaction. It wouldn't be the one she expected. He knew the Parliament would want to dish out some kind of punishment, and in the end, it had to be this one. It was preferable to execution, he surmised. But it'll mean saying goodbye to the Normandy. To her crew. To Tali. He wasn't so selfish as to take his entire crew with him to Earth to face trial with him, and like a protective father, he wanted to shield them and take the bullet for the team. We'll have to go seperate ways. Shit, this wasn't the way it was meant to end.
He turned to his wife, her gaze uncertain, and still waiting on him. I'm sorry, Tali. My beautiful, supportive, loving wife. You don't deserve any of this. I promised I'd come back to you, but now I'm being taken away from you...far away...light years away...entire clusters away...and you won't even be able to see me. But it'll only be for a short time, I can assume you, and it won't be forever. We'll see each other again, I promise you that. Despite it all, he had to hold back the tears he wanted to shed as he turned back to Hackett, ready with his answer. First the Bahak system, now this. I'm convinced, the galaxy hates me.
He spoke the words without even thinking about it, putting emotion into them that he didn't even feel, "Lethal force won't be necessary, Admiral," he stated like a drone, "I will accompany you to Arcturus Station to await the Parliament's official sanction."
Tali whorled on him in an instant, eyes alight with fury, "Marcus, NO!" his eyes dropped to the floor, closing them as he did, hearing Tali walk up to him and shout in his face, "You cannot be thinking about going with them! You don't deserve this! You cannot allow them to use you as a scapegoat to escape a war! Please don't...I..." suddenly, she wasn't shouting, and she was relaxed. Opening his eyes, he looked at her, and saw her standing beside him, not looking at him, but at Hackett, "I'm coming with you. The Alliance wants you, they can. But they'll be getting the full package."
"Tali-"
"No, I won't stand for it! This is unacceptable! I will not allow them to use you this way! Not alone!"
His hand grasped her shoulder, forcing her to turn around and look him in the eyes, "No, you're not coming with me. You'll be leaving this ship, and returning to the Migrant Fleet where its safe. I will not allow you to take the blame for my crime. Now, go wait outside." The words he spoke were those spoken to a subordinate by her commander, a tone he had not used with her since the early days of the Eden Prime War, a long time ago. It pained him to return to this state, after all they'd been through, to speak to her like this. But he didn't care if she hated him for it; at least she'd be safe and not being accused of crimes she didn't commit and being locked up with him, her freedoms ripped away. What did I say before the Aratoht mission? Oh, that's right, 'It's for the best.'
Harbinger's words on Illium returned in full strength. But this time, they all came. And they all made so much sense when he put the pieces together.
You will make a choice that will destroy you.
You will push those you love away in the name of false safeties.
You will surrender yourself, allowing time for our Arrival.
They all made sense now, and as he saw imagined Tali's devastated expression behind her mask, he could only turn into a bitter machine, too ashamed of what had to be done. Inside, he was mentally screaming. Fuck you for being right Harbinger. Just...fuck you.
"W-what?" Tali replied, her voice falling in on itself, "How can you-I-you can't-"
"Out. Now," Marcus replied coldly, "We will discuss your leave later. I need to speak with Hackett."
She backed away, shaking her head, "You can't be doing this...I'm your wife! Don't push me away like this!"
"It has to be done and you know it. I'm not arguing Tali," he growled, shoving a finger at the door, as if sending a child to her room after being grounded, "As your Commander, I'm ordering you to leave. Do so, or I will toss you out myself." As your husband, I'm begging you to leave before I do something I'll never forgive myself for.
Her eyes narrowed, and she pouted aggressively, "Fine then. I'll see you in the cabin. I'll be packing your stuff...and mine," she said the words with bitterness and hardship, the words not full of love but of anger and irritation, coupled with disgust. She stormed out of the bay, the door shutting behind her form. That's a battle I'll face later.
He turned back to Hackett, who's face was turned to the door before turning back to him, eyes widened, "Shepard, I understand your frustration, but you didn't-"
He cut him off abruptly, "Give me a couple of days, Admiral. I need to say goodbye to my squad, hopefully drop them off where they need to go. I also need to deal with an angry wife and explain why I need to go. After that, I'll let you escort the Normandy to Arcturus. Also, no action is to be taken against Staff Commander Alenko, as he was not involved in the incident, and was merely working beside me on behalf of the Systems Alliance brass. He will most likely return to Arcturus with me on the Normandy, so I just wanted to make that clear."
"Of course Commander," he stood to attention, snapping a quick salute, Marcus returning it, before both men dropped their hands, "I'll give you time to do what you need to do. I'll return to the McKinley and follow you around I guess; make it look I'm actually escorting you. Save you from any batarian vessels looking to get their claws at you."
He nodded, smiling mirthlessly, "Thank you sir."
Hackett nodded once more and left, leaving Marcus alone in the emptiness of the medical bay. He just stood there for a moment, contemplating what had just happened, trying to piece together where it all went wrong in his quest to stop the Reapers. I should never have gone to Aratoht. Damn it, I wish the Alpha Relay had never existed. EDI's voice interrupted his thoughts, her hologram appearing on the pedestal behind him.
"Commander, are you okay?" the AI asked, "Tali just stormed into your cabin, and her blood pressure is showing a massive spike, indicating extreme anger. She has been exhibiting this since she left the medical bay, and she almost had a physical confrontation with Gunnery Master Vakarian on the elevator. Garrus wants to know what went wrong."
He looked down at her hologram, and didn't answer for a few seconds. When he finally did, he was already turning to leave, pushing past a very inquisitive Chakwas.
"I'm still trying to figure that out."
{Loading...}
November 23, 2185
1318 hours.
'Humanity's Sanctum,' Upper Level, Cronos Station, Anadius System.
The Illusive Man, First Lieutenant Geoff Dielheart.
"This news is recent, I take it?"
"Brand new sir. Only just aired," Geoff replied from his position behind his chair, datapad in hand as it usually was and eyes locked on the holoscreen before them, "And its completely valid."
A sigh of smoke was seen and heard through the room, followed by the hiss of a cigarette melting into an ash tray, followed by the eerily calm response, which was devoid of any smugness, "So it's true then. The Bahak System is gone; the Alpha Relay was destroyed?"
"Yes sir," he replied, licking his lips as he continued, "Shepard was confirmed to be behind it, but his reasons, as of yet, haven't been released to the public."
"Lieutenant Dielheart, there is only one reason why Shepard, his moral highness that he is, would destroy a system full of three hundred people," a ghost of a smile travelled along his face, "Whether directly or not, the Reapers were connected to that relay, and Shepard destroyed it to avert something. Perhaps to destroy a Reaper, or maybe..." the thought was easy to find, and it made complete sense, "...to stop an invasion. Either way, he succeeded. The Reapers haven't popped up on the news, and no systems are being savaged, as of yet. We are in the clear, and we have Shepard to thank." So he is capable of the hard decisions, after all. His destruction of the Collector Base was still a mistake, to be sure, but at least he didn't falter this time. His failure this time would have cost the galaxy not Reaper technology, but its life. "What is Shepard's status now? He must be being tracked. And how is the rest of the galaxy reacting to this? Save the batarians; their's should be obvious enough."
Geoff cleared his throat, bringing up his datapad as he slid the screen up and down, "Well, the Council has released an official statement saying that Shepard's spectre status ended with his death, and that they had absolutely nothing to do with his mission against the Collectors or the Bahak massacre," he stopped for a moment, rolling his eyes as he finished his sentence, "For those who know Shepard; its safe to assume they've removed his spectre status. He won't have Council backing or funding anymore, which gives us an advantage in locating him."
"Locating him?" TIM replied, raising an eyebrow as he turned off the holoscreen, minimizing the news reports, "No, we will leave him alone. I think he has proven he is more than capable of running a competent operation on his own."
Geoff whipped to look at him in surprise, "We're not? But I thought you wanted us to-"
"Yes, when we were allied with the Shadow Broker, and we were chasing Shepard down to retrieve my ship," TIM sighed, eyes looking away from the bright light of Anadius before him, "Those mission parameters have now changed. Shepard has proven more capable on his own than I previously believed, and the Shadow Broker is now dead. Trying to reel Shepard in is pointless; especially when the resources being committed to that search could be better used building our army. How goes the construction of Titan?"
"Slowly, sir. As can be expected," Geoff replied, tittering at the readouts he saw, "Petrovsky is having his men on Omega ferry as many resources to that particular project as he can, but right now just finding a place to build in secret is proving difficult. The Project Lead says that once they've found the right place, they'll begin laying down the framework. Titan will be finished before the Reapers arrive, he has promised."
He shook his head, "A promise he cannot keep. Our time is shorter than first precedented," TIM declared, standing from his chair, glass in hand as he approached the observation glass, speaking as he did, "If the Bahak Incident is any indication, we are running even shorter on time than we first thought. We must act quickly," he turned to face the lieutenant, eyes demanding to be appeased, "How goes Operation: Sharpened Blade?"
Geoff looked at him for a second before coughing and replying, "Better than Project Titan, assuredly. The Second Fleet was dispatched quite a while ago with the Reaper IFFs from Sovereign's corpse pieces entered into their databases. As of 13 hours ago, they have safely travelled the Omega 4 Relay and are now recovering what they can from the Collector Base ruins. If they find anything, will you want it brought here?"
"Yes. As soon as possible. We will need to commence research on it so that we can develop ways to control the Reapers. As for that matter, how about Project Deathstroke? I hope our dear Mister Lawson is getting well acquianted with his new research quarters."
"We haven't heard much from him sir, but as soon as we do, you'll be notified immediately," Geoff stated, switching off his datapad and clasping his hands behind his back, posture straightening, "Also sir, our agents in the Parliament say there has been...a new turn of events regarding Shepard."
TIM had been about to sit back down, but ceased his movement, glowing blue synthetic eyes locking back onto Geoff's immediately upon hearing his words, "What do they have to say?"
"Shepard is going to be arrested. They came to a decision an hour ago, and they've dispatched the McKinley under Hackett to see to it that Shepard is brought to Arcturus Station and contained them for his trial."
He gratted his teeth, but his kept mouth shut, not wanting to break the air of calm he invoked. But when he spoke, he couldn't help but add the acid in his tone, "And the moralistic fool probably won't resist. He'll give in the moment its suggested." There was other things he wanted to say, but they weren't words you'd expect from the leader of Cerberus, so he kept them to himself. With Shepard out of the picture and confined on Arcturus, the galaxy will need someone else to continue preparing it. Cerberus will be just that.
He had come to realize it a long time ago, but Cerberus wasn't just about humanity anymore. It wasn't just humanity's sword. It was the galaxy's shield; its unwanted, unliked, unfavored protector. Their methods were extremely harsh, but they got results. They always had humanity's survival in mind; and now it was time to broaden that spectrum to the entire galaxy. Shepard may be indisposed, but Cerberus would be up to the job. He had the men, the ships, the technology and the power. I'll be doing what you're too weak to do; I will protect the galaxy while you waste away in a cell. I will carry on, even if you cannot.
He turned to Geoff for the final time, determination in his eyes, "Bring up all available manpower. Send messages to all Cerberus agents immediately and inform them of our new status. We are now going to continue Shepard's work in his absence. Eva will continue searching through the Archives for what she needs, Kai Leng will continue keeping Aria in check, Petrovsky will rule Omega with an iron fist, and Mr. Lawson will continue his research. But everyone else is to be on standby when they are needed; the Reapers are coming, and we will find a way to control them, or die in the attempt. Understood, Dielheart?"
The man snapped a firm salute, "Yes sir! I'll get on it right away!" With that, he dropped his hand and moved to leave the room in a hurried pace. The Illusive Man himself turned to face Anadius once more, a light filling his eyes.
Cerberus will protect the galaxy, no matter the cost.
And controlling the Reapers will not only save them, but bring them under humanity's control. Humanity will ascend to its rightful place in the galaxy, with a Reaper armada enforcing its rule. And the galaxy will finally know that the people born of Earth are not to be trifled with.
He fell into his chair, and the sound of someone exhaling could be heard.
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November 23, 2185
1427 hours.
Mess Hall, Normandy-Class Stealth Frigate Normandy SR-2, In Orbit over Terra Nova, Asgard System.
Commander Marcus Lee Shepard, Gunnery Master Garrus Vakarian, Master Thief Kasumi Goto, Justicar Samara, Second Lieutenant Jacob Taylor, Staff Commander Kaidan Alenko, Major General Kal'Reegar vas Normandy, First Lieutenant Madi'Soi vas Ceresa, Power Engineer Kenneth Donnelly, Propulsion Engineer Gabriella Daniels, Mess Sergeant Rupert Gardner, Yeoman Kelly Chambers, Flight Lieutenant Jeff 'Joker' Moreau, Chief Medical Officer Karin Chakwas.
There he stood, at the edge of the sleeper pod deck, looking down upon the Mess Hall. He remembered the position well; it had been where he stood after the battle of the Collector Base had concluded, and where he had spoken to his crew; where they had decided to stay with him, all acknowledging the Reaper threat. But now most of them were gone, and he was about to ask the remainder to leave. The irony is dripping...practically.
The entire crew had been gathered in the Mess Hall, except Tali who had refused to leave the cabin. Hackett had since returned to the McKinley, the dreadnought now looming over them in an escort position, ready to follow the Normandy to Arcturus Station. Marcus didn't look forward to going, but he knew he had to, to atone for his crimes. No matter what Tali says, I have to go. Where else would I go? Run around the galaxy as a rogue criminal? How can a unite a galaxy when all of them want to hand me over to the batarians? No, the crew will have to continue on without me. To do what I cannot.
He looks upon his crew with pride in his posture, a grim smile on his face as she stood there, hands clasped behind his back, wearing his N7 hoodie and pants, but without the cap. They were one hell of a team, and they had been through hell together, but this was a hell they wouldn't be travelling through together. This one he'd be traversing by himself. It was for their own good, and his own. The destruction of the Bahak System had nothing to do with them, and he would make sure to protect them accordingly. If only Tali could understand that...but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.
Finally, with his crew fully assembled, he knew it was time. He cleared his throat loudly, and spoke just as loudly, "Everyone, please settle down and listen to me."
All talk in the room ceased, and all eyes landed on him. Garrus turned from Kasumi, looking at him with interested eyes, and Kasumi crossed her arms, continuing to lean on one hip as she listened to him. Gardner still stood behind the kitchen counter as he turned, and both Kelly and Samara turned from him as well to appraise their commander. Kaidan and Jacob ceased their conversation, and Kal and Madi fixed their gazes on him, hands locked together.
He looked upon them all, and felt the smile drop, and a tear almost reach his eye, but like with Hackett, he did not shed them, for he could not drop his impenetrable visage. I have to be strong, if not for myself, then for them. I cannot let them know that I am weak. I must...be strong. It was killing him inside.
"Most of you probably know why I have brought you here. Some do not," Marcus stated, eying all of them as his eyes scanned the room, memorizing their faces, "But all of you know of what happened to the Bahak System. Of the many lives lost when I detonated the Alpha Relay, and sacrificed their lives in the name of stopping an imminent Reaper invasion. But in the end, it did not achieve anything."
He held up one hand to forestall any disagreements, and when he was sure noone was going to object, continued, "In the end, we merely delayed the invasion a few months. A year, if we're lucky. Kenson told me this herself, and even while she was indoctrinated, I knew she was right. We've merely halted their progress, but they will arrive regardless. And guess what? We still won't be ready. The Council will still be denying their existence, and the Alliance and every other faction will do nothing to prepare for them. When you look at it; we achieved nothing. Changes are still to be made, but that doesn't change facts; three hundred thousand lives were sacrificed for nothing."
"And the Alliance Parliament doesn't even see it like that," the spectre explained, sighing heavily as he inhaled and exhaled, looking down at the ground, "The way the galaxy sees it, I just unprovokedly murdered them and blew up an entire star system in a act of war against the Hegemony. They demand compensation via the retrieval of my head, and the Parliament is unwilling to fullfill that request. But they have promised retribution for my crimes. Even now, the Council has revoked my status as a member of the Special Tactics and Recon branch of the Citadel."
Gasps were heard, and Garrus' eyes widened in anger at this declaration, but they all listened intently, holding any disgusted comments for the end of his speech. His fear, unfortunately, that the comments would be even more disgusted by the end. Keep going. Do not falter. Do not weaken. Do what you must.
Has to be me. Somoene else might get it wrong.
Mordin's mantra gave him strength to continue, and he did, licking his lips as he met their eyes, seemingly all at once, "And their punishment has been dealt. The SSV McKinley is here to escort the Normandy to Arcturus Station where it will be impounded in an Alliance dock, and where I will be handed into custody. For all intents and purposes, I am now under arrest, the Normandy is of non-affiliation, and your service to me terminated. Terra Nova is just below, and Admiral Hackett will provide shuttles to ferry you there. I urge you all to leave, except Staff Commander Alenko, as the Parliament has pardoned him from any wrong doing."
The Mess Hall, as he knew it would, went into uproar. Anger reverbrated in waves throughout the room as people snapped up from their chairs and looked at him in surprise and yelled their disgust and objections. In the end, he was forced to yell to quiet them, "Enough! This is non-negoitable. These crimes are unforgivable, and I will be handing myself over. This is not up for debate. You have 24-hours to leave the Normandy for it disembarks for the Arcturus Stream Cluster, so say your farewells and be gone. I do not want to see you, any of you, exposed to the political feedback of this, or punished for crimes of my doing."
"This is ridiculous," Garrus objected, standing forward and shaking his head, "You can't be doing this!" He turned to the elevator, before turning back to him, "Tali's anger makes perfect sense now! How can you just turn your back on the Reapers like this, hmmm? How can you just abandon your own wife just to appease the Alliance!"
He turned to Garrus, his eyes alight with fury, "Because its that or war! Don't you get it? The batarians are blaming the Alliance for this, and if they don't punish me in some way, they'll declare the war. So when the Reapers arrive, they'll be too weakened from fighting each other to be able to fight back, and they'll be wiped out! I will not watch my people obliterated because I wanted to stay safe! I'm not turning my back on Tali; this is the only way I can keep her safe! The batarians will do anything to hurt me now, and what better way than to target her? She'll be safe on the Migrant Fleet, and more importantly, able to help prepare her people for the Reapers! Like the rest of you can!"
He turned to Garrus, "You can go to Palaven, talk to your father, tell him everything you've seen," he turned back to Kasumi, "You've got the evidence, make it public. You can break into buildings to steal stuff, now break into the media and make this stuff live!" he whorled on Samara, "Go to Thessia, inform your leaders! They'll listen to a justicar's words of wisdom, will they not?" He turned to everyone in the room, "You do not need me to save the galaxy; in truth, I am nothing without you! I am nothing without my team! You guys make everything possible, and in the end, my burden becomes yours to uphold. I may not be able to, but you will be. Do what you can, save what you can, but most of all, raise what awareness you can. Besides, never be afraid to say what you need to publically, because you have the Shadow Broker on your side now," he spoke with sternness and compassion, voice laced with sorrow for what must be done, "You guys can do it, I know you can. Go on without me; and use the time we have left wiselessly. For the war has truly begun," he slowly moved down the steps, saying his last words to the group as he moved to leave, "Remember, Hackett's shuttles are in the bay waiting. Get your stuff and leave at your own discretion. I need to speak to Tali."
Before he could leave, he felt a three-fingered hand latch onto his shoulder, and he whorled around to face Garrus, a look of confusion, anger and melancholy in his own eyes. But most of all, there was a look of understanding, "I'm sorry for what you have to do Marcus, I truly am. Just...don't waste away brother. We can raise the army, but we can't lead it. Only you can do that. Serve your time and get back out there. We need you. All of us do. The galaxy does, fuck what the Council thinks about it."
He smiled grimly, nodding solemnly, "Thanks Garrus...for understanding what I need to do. I need to do this. I wish it weren't that way, but it is. Just...make sure you make the time we have worth it. You don't have much."
"I will," he turned to everyone else, "Every single one of us will," he held out his talon, waiting for a brotherly hug, "Come on, give one for your bro, here. I think that's what humans call brothers. Am I your bro?"
He laughed despite himself, taking the hand and slamming forward, slapping his hand on his friend's back, "Yes, Vakarian. You are. No Shepard without Vakarian."
"Don't make that a religion," Garrus quipped, chuckling as he let go, and Marcus pulled away, "I don't want to be accused of starting a revolution of new ideals. Plus, 'Prophet Vakarian' doesn't ring as well as 'Badass the Vakarianm,'" the joke over, his face softened and he patted Marcus a final time on the shoulder, "Spirits watch over you, Marcus. We'll miss you."
"And I you, brother," he replied, turning to Kasumi, "As for you, I don't know what to say."
"Me neither Shep. Never been big on goodbyes, and Garrus covered all I wanted to say," she waved her hands in the air before letting them fall back down at her sides, wrapping him in a light hug of her own, "I guess this is all I can really give you. To...to thank you."
"Thank me?" Marcus asked, confused, "What did I do?" He pulled away, and Kasumi merely giggled, giving him a sideways glance.
"You helped me move on after I lost Keiji," she explained, "I could have kept his greybox, you know. Ignored your suggestion, kept it and dwelled on the times we had together. But I didn't. That was your influence. I destroyed it, and moved on, and while Keiji will always have a special place in my memory," she hooked an arm around Garrus', leaning her head on his shoulder, a grin on her face, "I've got new memories now, a new life. I intend to enjoy them as best I can. Won't be much of a place for a Master Thief in the galaxy very soon."
"Take care of yourself Kasumi," he replied, smiling lightly, "Try not to get into too much trouble."
"I won't. Get into trouble, I mean," she smirked, letting go of Garrus and giving a mock salute, "I'll try my best to raise awareness. Its all I can do, just...just try not to get executed. The galaxy still needs you."
"Goodbye Garrus. Farewell Kasumi. May...may Hashem watch over the both of you," Marcus said to them and quickly made his way over to Jacob and Kaidan, a solemn smile on his face. Hashem watch over you? I gave up on religion after I died. Maybe a part of me is still Jewish...just a small part. He wished for some strength, for these goodbyes were beginning to tear at him deep inside. Its only temporary, he keeps telling himself, but just how temporary is it? And no matter what he did, his mind kept travelling to Tali, and what heartbreaking goodbye awaited him in that cabin. Their cabin.
Kaidan and Jacob sighed heavily as he came to them, shaking their heads with a look of regret in both of their eyes, "Can't believe this is where it ends. For now, anyway," Kaidan spoke first, leaning his back against the table with his arms crossed, "I mean, to be taken by politics and back-room deals? Sucks. Almost reminds me of when we got grounded at the Citadel all those years ago when we were chasing Saren."
"Yeah, I remember," Marcus replied, crossing his arms, "But back then, I hadn't blown up a system full of innocent people."
"True," Kaidan replied, inhaling through his nose, "Still sucks, though. I know I'll do my damnest to continue the fight though. Not much I can do on Earth, but I'm sure Anderson will help me out. Surprised they pardoned me though; yet again, probably due to my track record. They didn't hand you over to the batarians because of it, so why would they arrest me?"
"Yeah, I here you," Jacob spoke up, moving to stand beside him, snapping a quick salute, "I don't know you as well as everyone else Commander, but in the time I've served with you, I know that when the fight comes, I'll be there, waiting. Right now, all I can do is stay hidden from Cerberus. Maybe help out the Broker with some information searching. Best I can do really. Can't return to Earth unless I want to be arrested, so that option is out."
Marcus sighed, laying a hand on the man's shoulder, "I know that whatever you do Jacob will be the right choice. Maybe you could head over to Illium first; check on how Miranda is doing and how well she's recovering."
"Thanks. I'll do that. Definitely. It'll do her some good to see a friendly face in that hospital," he chuckled, offering a brotherly hug like Garrus had. Marcus accepted it, and they hugged, breaking apart shortly after with a chuckle, "Until then though, I got to keep up the fight. I'll see Miranda, and then I'll help prepare the galaxy however I can. Maybe get in contact with some of my contacts I had while in the Corsairs. Get their help. Its not much, but its a start. I'll see you around Shepard; and...try and keep out of trouble. Can't stress how much this coming battle depends on you."
"You too Jacob. You're a good man," with a final nod, he shrugged, "All I can say is to do the same. Avoid any merc groups and Cerberus, and prepare the galaxy has best you can."
"Will do Commander," snapping a final salute, Jacob spun on his heel and left, allowing the spectre to turn and face Kaidan, who was awaiting eagerly.
"Well, can't really say goodbye, since I'm coming with you," he lamented, shrugging his shoulders as his arms remained crossed over his chest, "This isn't right."
He sighed in turn, Marcus trying to overcome the events of the past few days as best he could, but it was a battle lost from the get go, "We're past trying to argue the morals of this decision, Kaidan. Best we can both do now is just accept it for what it is and try our best to overcome it. That's all we can do. What would you have done in my place?"
The soldier exhaled through his nostrils, nodding his reluctant agreement, "I see your point, doesn't make it hurt any less. Just want you to know that I'll be there until the end; until your transferred to your cell, that is. Hackett's assigned me as part of your escort, so that eases some things up alittle."
He grinned for a moment, letting it drop as it came up, "Good to know I'll have someone I know watching over me. Thanks, Kaidan. For...everything. For accepting who I was on Horizon, and joining me. You, Garrus and Tali...its as close to the old team as we could get, and its all thanks to you."
"Wouldn't have missed it for the world," Kaidan returned, nodding as he slapped his commander's shoulder with a sigh, and moved off the table, "Well, I'd better stow the armoury. You know, lock up all the weapons and issue the lockdown Hackett ordered. Can't allow you to return to station on a ship that has a fully equipped and available armoury, you know?"
He laughed, "Agreed."
Once Kaidan had taken his leave from the room, he made his way over to where Samara stood with Chakwas and Gardner, all three of them noticing him upon approach and ceasing conversation, eyes turning towards him with a bitterness and sorrow to them. Samara's stare was as stone-faced as ever, however, but Chakwas' face showed genuine regret over the current events, and Gardner looked reproachful, at best.
"Commander," Samara greeted, nodding her at him with solemn grace, "Your speech was...motivational, as was the wisdom put into them. Yes, the asari people will listen to the words of a Justicar. We may be an ancient order, but we have hardened wisdom, and my status as a matriarch will only make my words more digestable. The people of Thessia will listen, but I can not guarantee they will do anything. But I will try my best, as my duty as a Justicar dictates."
"You don't need to prove anything to me Samara," Marcus offered, nodding to her in respect, "You've had my back since this Collector ordeal began, and I trust you to do what needs to be done in my absence. Besides, maybe now you'll have a chance to visit your daughters?"
Her expression faltered for a second, before folding back together, "My duties-"
"-have time. We have months at best, Samara. The Reapers will arrive something; don't you want to see them one last time before going into battle? I know Thane wanted to see his son before he battled the Reapers, so why not you with your daughters? They deserve to know that their mother cares, and it'll remind you that not all them are murderers like Morinth was."
She opened her mouth to respond, but could find no words and eventually just closed her mouth, the ghost of a smile, as always, creasing across her mouth, "You are right, Shepard. I will visit them, see how they are doing. I will also visit Jack at Huerta Memorial; see how she is doing."
He raised an eyebrow at the asari, "You and Jack are friends? Never would have guessed."
"I see Jack as my daughter, in some ways," Samara added in lamentation, a melancholy present in her eyes as she remembered things long past, "She reminds me of Morinth in so many ways. The attitude towards life and fate; the need to beat it at its own game and survive. But where Morinth chose to murder out of a love for it, Jack did it out of a false sense of necessity brought on by her troubled past. I have seeked to fix her, to show her a different path to the one of violence she leads. Because of this, I see her as a daughter I never had. And like any of my daughters, I will make sure is okay, as a mother's duty demands."
He smiled, nodding, "Glad to hear it, Samara. I've always said the Normandy changes the people who serve on it, and that couldn't be more true. Thank you Samara, for everything. Its been an honor to serve alongside you, and I hope to do so again very soon."
"The honor is all mine. By the Justicar code, I have been honored to serve you," she bowed to him, hands clasping behind her back, "And because of this, I must take my leave now. Once on Terra Nova, I will take a transport to the Citadel and see Jack, then to Lesuss to see my daughters. Once that is done, I will return to the home of the asari, and seek to protect it from those who wish to destroy it," a final nod and she left, leaving Marcus with Chakwas and Gardner. He watched her leave, before turning to them, nodding once more, as he seemed to be doing alot. What else can I do? My crew is falling like flies, leaving one by one, and it is of my doing.
"Commander," Gardner spoke, voice full of anger, "I'd just like you to know that what you're doing-"
"Duly noted, Gardner. I understand your frustration, but there is no point in voicing in it. My decision is final," he spoke firmly, showing the mess sergeant he wasn't budging. Gardner was about to retort, but Chakwas got in first, holding up a hand to forestall any further argument from him. Sighing, she stood up and out of nowhere, wrapped Marcus in a tight, motherly hug, taking him by surprise. After a second, he returned the hug, and Chakwas tightened it. After a moment, she pulled a way, a few tears in her eyes, but she quickly rubbed them away.
"Just so you know, this is crap. I just wanted you to know that. You know, get it of my chest," Chakwas declared, straightening her posture as she sighed, recovering herself, "I've served with the Alliance a long time, and never have I seen them make a bigger mistake. But I'll stand by your decision, and know when I have to leave. I just wanted to say goodbye; after this, I'll start packing up the med bay. Going to miss it. Loved working in space; luckily, Hackett's kept that in mind."
He widened his eyes in shock, "He kept that in mind...? Chakwas, are you saying...?"
"Yes, I'm officially an Alliance medical officer again," she stated, a smile on her lips, "Hackett pulled some strings, and reminded the Parliament that I technically did nothing wrong in joining Cerberus to help you. Hackett's had me assigned as the medical chief on the McKinley until he can find me another placement. It isn't the Normandy, but at least I won't be stuck on some planet like I was on Mars after you died."
He didn't know what to say. If Chakwas was reinstated in the Alliance, he would have thought that she'd be court-marshalled right alongside him, but she wasn't. Instead she was merely reinstated, no strings attached. At least she wasn't subjected to the same punishment as he was, "That's good to hear Chakwas."
"Jeff, unfortunately, is still posted to the Normandy, I heard," Chakwas said with sorrow, her posture weakening upon the revelation, "Hackett insisted he be allowed to continue to serve as the Normandy's pilot, and the brass gave in. Its good; Jeff loves the Normandy, and I think it'd be suicide to even contemplate removing it from his hands, but for me to not be there...Jeff's gotten used to me as his medical practitioner. Without me there...it won't be the same."
"The Normandy won't be the same, that much is certain, doctor," he assured her, placing a hand on her shoulder and grasping it gently, "But it won't be like that forever. We'll all be back together again. Nothing keeps the Shepard team apart for long."
Chakwas nodded, smiling, "I know, I know...I just get so sentimental sometimes..."
"A little sentimentality never hurt anyone," he smiled, nodding with sadness as he knew the goodbye was coming, "I...I'll miss you, Doctor. I truly will. You've been like a mother to me without my real one around, and I have no doubt you'll do just as well aboard the McKinley. I won't forget you, the crew won't forget you, the Normandy won't forget you."
"Thank you Marcus," she said with a finality, "And hope rest upon you. I may be taking this well, but Tali won't."
"She isn't," he corrected, shaking his head, "But she'll come around. She has no choice," he turned away, nodding solemnly as he moved to approach Gabby and Ken, who talked animatedly with Kal and Madi; likely also giving their own goodbyes. She has no choice. Because fuck her opinion, right? You're an asshole, Marcus. He shook his head, clearing those painful thoughts. I'm doing this because I love her. I would never force her to take the blame alongside me. Never would I subject her to that, even if she volunteered to. No, she won't be coming with me, like it or not.
He came to a stop before the four, and all of them turned towards him, snapping salutes. I'm no Commander. Not anymore. There's no need to salute. Stop it. He returned it regardless, before dropping the hand to his side, "At ease. No need to salute anymore. Not at this point in time. As of now, I'm not even your commanding officer anymore."
"You will always be our commanding officer, no what those wee little assholes in the Parliament think," Ken declared, elbowing Gabby lightly in the side to garner her agreement, "Right Gabby?"
"Damn right," she replied with determination, both of them turning towards him, Gabby having to swipe aside a lock of ginger hair that caught in her face as both of them spoke, "Which is why we ain't leaving."
His head snapped back to them in an instant, eyes locking with theirs, "You won't be staying, that's an order. You-"
"-have nowhere to go," Gabby informed him, waving her hand to indicate the Normandy, "This is our home. Ever since the Alliance disowned us for speaking out against the criticism against you, we've known nothing but the world of Cerberus. But now that we've told them to get stuffed, we've only had you and the Normandy. One is now being impounded, and the other is being arrested. We're exposed now," she turned to Ken, a gleam in her eye as she then turned back to her commander, "We go out there, Cerberus won't stop hunting us down. When they find us, they'll kill us. We're engineers; what can we do to unite the galaxy? The only place we have is on the Normandy, where it's always been. So we'll say it again," she turned to Ken, letting him finish.
And he did, "We're staying, end of story."
Marcus couldn't help but smile, his stern expression faltering at their grandiose speech. Finally, he sighed, knowing they couldn't be uprooted from their decision, "You do realize what this means right? The Alliance will arrest you for treason and for allying yourself with a known terrorist organization, just like they'll likely do with me. I can't protect you, and Hackett can't bail you out."
"You think we don't know this? We don't care at this point," Ken replied, waving a dismissive hand, "A matter of fact, none of the crew cares at this point. They're all with us on this. Maybe not Kelly. But that's probably because she doesn't seem to care anymore. She just seems...out of it. But me and Gabby? Gardner? We don't care. Its over as far as we're concerned until the Reapers arrive, and until then, Alliance holding cell is preferable to running from Cerberus for months on end."
"Okay, okay, I see your point," Marcus said, holding up his hand to halt any further argument, "You can stay, not that I can stop you anyway. I just hope you two know what you're getting into," with that cleared, he turned to Kal and Madi, who waited patiently for him to address them. The big issue now was them. And a certain someone who would be returning with them.
"Kal, Madi," he addressed, "Guess I can already tell where you two will be going."
Kal chuckled, Madi letting herself smile behind her mask. He hadn't seen much or knew much about Madi, but he knew she was Kal's mate, and that was enough for him. Finally, Kal stopped his laughing, speaking as he did with his thick accent that reminded him so much of an American, "Yeah, the Migrant Fleet is pretty much the only place we have left to go to. Besides, the admirals will be more inclined to listen about the Reapers now that one of their best marines is supporting the claim. My sanity's never been in question."
He appreciated the joke, and it made him smile slightly, but it was doomed to last only a short while, "Well, my luck goes to you Reegar. And you, Lieutenant Soi. I wish it wasn't like this, but...well, life sucks. And I guess the Alliance had to get back at me at some point for abandoning them and telling them to get fucked."
Kal nodded in agreement, "Always bites us in the ass, doesn't it? Bloody politicians," he patted Marcus on the shoulder, holding Madi's hand in his other hand, "The quarians will be ready, Shepard. I promise you that. We," he motioned to Madi with his head, will make sure of it."
He nodded, knowing the goodbyes were over, he reached the topic he had wanted to talk about the least. The one that hurt him the most, but needed to be said, "Also, I was wondering if you'd take Tali with you. She's going to have nowhere to go at present, and I doubt she'll willingly board that shuttle."
"Of course she'll be welcome," Kal told him, "Its about to you to convince her though."
He nodded, giving one final goodbye, "Then its goodbye, Kal, Madi. Good luck to both of you in your travel home. Remember the real threat." With that, he turned away. More goodbyes, more farewells. More sorrow and melancholy.
And then Tali.
The worst goodbye of all.
{Loading...}
November 23, 2185
1445 hours.
The Shepards' Quarters, Normandy-Class Stealth Frigate Normandy SR-2, In Orbit over Terra Nova, Asgard System.
Chief Engineer Tali'Shepard vas Normandy.
Her mind screamed at her to stop. To drop all her things, to stop packing, and to march back down to the Mess Hall and wrap Marcus in her arms, holding him there until he gave in and brought her with him. The pain was too much to really comprehend, and it stung at her like an incessant wound. But her body ignored her pleas, her demands, her infuriated mental yells and screams and continued to retrieve her things from her small, makeshift desk in the center of the cabin, taking them and packing them into whatever pockets she could find in her suit. She considered taking the clothes, but what was the point? Can't use them on the Fleet anyway...
Marcus hadn't followed her up, and she could only take that as a bad sign. The Marcus Shepard she had seen in the med bay hadn't been her lover, her boyfriend and her eventual husband; it had been the Commander she had forgotten about two years ago; the one that had disappeared, at least for her, ever since they became a couple and he had opened up to her. But he had shut closed again, keeping her out and the sheer cold in his words had hurt her to the core, and infuriated her.
The destruction of that relay did more to him than I could have known. If only I had seen the signs, and known just what it had done to him. It cracked him, split him up, and now he's doing his best to fix the damage, and this is the best way he can show it. By handing himself over...abandoning me...
Her belly ached again, but she ignored it, too furious to care, too angry. So blinded by his need to atone for his 'crimes,' that he's turned his back on his own family! I'm probably going to be pregnant with his child soon if this serum works, and he just leaves me to go to Earth and live in a cell? And for what? Because he stopped a threat noone will recognize? He's a...AN IDIOT!
With an irritated, high-pitched scream, he grabbed her suitcase and violently threw it across the room, where it slammed into a bulkhead nearby and fell onto the ground, spilling its contents all over. She slid and fell onto the couch, feeling as if her head was about to burst, the endurance of her torment quickly falling apart. She couldn't take it anymore. The idea of leaving him...it tore her apart. I can't just leave him...
Her screaming had made her deaf to the sound of the cabin door opening, and she was almost startled from her lamentation when Marcus' voice spoke up just behind her, a resigned inflection in his tone, "Kal and Madi have agreed to...to take you back to the Fleet. You'll be leaving in twenty minutes, so I'd recommend packing up. I'll...I'll help you, if you want..."
The words sounded forced, like he didn't want to acknowledge their existence. She didn't either, as she lethargically got up and walked over to the steps at the bottom, looking up at him with sorrow in her eyes, but also a pent up rage, "You...that's all you have to say?" she had learnt alot from humans, and what she said even surprised her, "Get your stuff and piss off to the Flotilla? Because fuck my feelings, right? I don't matter."
His eyes widened in his surprise, but she saw his lip quivering, as if the last of his resolve was crippling, and this was all he could to keep himself from falling apart. But for the most part he kept himself together as he responded, "I'm doing this with you in mind-"
"No, you're giving yourself up, that's what you're doing," Tali yelled over the top of him, moving up to the steps until she was in his face, "This; all of what you're doing, is because you need to atone. Well go fucking atone. Because I obviously don't matter. You don't even care about what I think, you selfish bosh'tet."
"I'm doing this to keep you safe..." he said softly, as if saying it too loudly might destroy him, the man never having been as delicate as he was now, "To keep you...out of the line of fire...I won't see you convicted alongside me...this is for your own good..."
"Remember what you promised about coming back to me?" Tali asked, moving a bit further away, anger still present, "Remember what you said?"
He froze, as if caught in the act, and he murmured something. She spoke up, "Excuse me, what?"
He spoke louder, and she heard his words, "I remember. I promised. I made a promise."
"And you broke it. Or breaking it. Whichever one comes first," she waved a dismissive hand, not caring for the consequence, "You're turning your back on me, on your unformed child, on your crew and on yourself. I need you, Marcus," she stated, leaning on his desk, "I need you, and this is what you do? What kind of husband are you? I thought you loved me."
"I do love you damn it! That's why I'm doing this!" he yelled, as if finally unable to take the criticism anymore, "I'm not doing this for me, but for you! I want to keep you out of the line of fire! To protect you!"
"And maybe I want this? Did you ever think about that?" Tali replied furiously, jabbing a finger hurtfully into his chest in her haze of vehemence, "Maybe I want to be with you! You made not only a promise, but a solem vow at our own wedding! Say the words!"
"Tali, please. I'm begging you. Understand-"
"I don't want to hear it! I'm sick of listening to your bullshit! Say the damn words you bosh'tet!"
He gave in, unwilling to meet her eyes as he looked at the ground, his resolve all but fallen apart. He said the words in a soft voice, one that bore the brunt of a coming wave of tears, ones he had been bottling up since he said his goodbyes down below, "Till death do us part."
"Till death do us part," Tali replied in tandem, shaking her head, "So you do remember. Yet you seem so intent on tearing us apart from each other. We are husband and wife, till death do us part, and yet you want me to leave you. If I didn't love you, I would have left and never come back. But I do. I love you like no sane woman should, and will never leave your side, no matter how much you anger me right now," she moved forward and into his face, "So what do you say? Let me come with you."
He muttered something.
"Excuse me?"
He muttered again.
"Said it louder!"
"You're not coming with me, alright!" he yelled, startling her. They stood there, looking at each other. A deathly silence fell over them like a shroud, and after a while, he broke it, attempting to move forward and wrap her in a hug...
...only for her to give him a death glare as she placed both hands on his chest and pushed forward, pushing him back. The force surprised him and sent him staggering into a wall, and his hurt expression would never leave her mind ever again, just the sight of it pained her, but he had seriously pissed her off.
"Don't touch me," she cursed at him, moving to go down the steps, "You've lost that right. Don't presume to touch me ever again."
She moved down the steps, moving over to the bed to retrieve her things. They were still sprawled out on the door, some of the items having fallen onto the bed. She would miss it sorely, and she would miss Marcus. She hadn't lied; she would always love him, but if this was how she was going to get her point across, she needed to show him she meant business. But just as she painfully moved to pick up her stuff, she heard a light sob.
She stopped, and heard the sob followed by another, followed by yet another. Standing, she turned to see Marcus sitting against the wall, looking at the ground, a flood of tears coming down his cheeks in waves. Despite her mind telling her to just leave him there, that he had done no less an amount of damage to her, but she something else made her fall apart at seeing him like that. Caving in, she walked slowly over to him, watching him just sit there, letting it all out.
Whether he noticed her returned presence or not, he gave no indication, he merely began talking, as if speaking to the ground, "Its...its all gone to shit since I landed on Aratoht...a simple fucking mission...I...I couldn't even stop that from going over and around," he shook his head, wiping his eyes, "Kenson dead, along with three hundred thousand. I keep saying those numbers, and no matter how much I try to convince myself that they are alot of people dead, I just can't seem to weep tears for them," he looked up at her finally, eyes full of confusion, "I weep tears over losing you, but three hundred thousand murdered at my hands doesn't warrant that? What the fuck is wrong with me?"
"Am I a monster to be so unfazed?"
She couldn't answer that one, merely meeting his eyes and shrugging, ever silent. Maybe I've been the one who's been selfish...but why would he-
"That's the real reason I'm telling you to leave, Tali," he informed her, looking back at the desk, "Because the trial of a monster is not where you belong. Its with your people. You're not a monster. But I am. The monster who murders thousands and doesn't even shed a tear. A selfish monster who fears losing his wife, who doesn't even deserve the burdens he places on her."
She cracked at that, and she fell to her knees, flinging her arms up and around him, "Don't say that. You're not a monster, you're not."
"Oh, but I am. Its just something I've come to accept," he stroked her head in melancholy, sniffing as he finished his weeping, looking up at the ceiling, "You...I need you to leave Tali. I maybe selfish, and you can hate me all you want, but I'll be content knowing your safe on the Fleet, where you can help prepare for the Reapers. I don't care if I have to-"
"You won't have to force me," she gave in, whispering into his ear in defeat. The torment he has been put through, I will give him this wish. We will be together again, so it can't be that bad, right? This isn't the end, "Just give me several minutes to pack up. And to say my goodbyes."
He nodded, looking at her, "You don't have to-"
"I do. And about what I said," she picked her head up and tapped her visor against his forehead, and looked into his eyes, "I didn't mean them. Any of them. I'll always love you, and you're never forbidden from touching me. I was just...so angry with what you were doing, I couldn't see the bigger picture. I'm going to miss you, though."
He lifted a hand, stroking her cheek, wrapped up in the moment as he felt her own hand begin to wipe away any tears left behind, "I'll miss you too; never said I wouldn't. I will think of you everyday and moment I spend in that cell, content in the fact that you're some place else, with people to talk to you and friends around you," he smiled as he finished his sentence, "I love you too, Tali. And that's why I'm doing this."
They sat there for a few more moments, wrapped up in each other's love. Tali wanted to weep as well, but she had to be strong, for his sake. If they both fell apart, neither of them would have the strength to leave, and they knew that was plain unacceptable. So with reluctance, she pulled herself, helping him up with an offered hand. He took it, kissing it as he let go, turning to wear she pointed her finger.
"My stuff...threw it across the room in my anger...I'm sorry, but um..." she scratched the back of her neck, watching him cautiously, "Will you help me pack up?"
He smiled wearily, sighing as he did, and took her hand in his as they moved over to the clothing left on the ground, "Of course I will. It'll give us a chance to...say what needs to be said."
They spent close to two hours packing up...well, they spent five minutes packing up and cleaning up, but after that Tali had suggested 'making love to each other one final time,' to which he agreed. When they were finished, they had cleaned up, gotten dressed again, and straightened out the bed, before he took Tali's stuff and followed her into the elevator, hitting the button for the Shuttle Bay.
They arrived sooner then they would have liked, eyes fixed on each other the entire time, and hands locked together tightly. When the elevator doors opened, they didn't want to leave, but reluctantly pulled their eyes apart, let go of each other's hands and Tali picked up her suitcase, immediately heading over and into the bay, where a single alliance kodiak was waiting; dressed up in white and blue.
As they approached, they attracted the attention of the squad, Chakwas and Kelly, the latter saying she had wanted to work on the Citadel, hopefully for C-Sec in some form. Tali had said her goodbyes to them, especially a drawn out one with Kasumi, followed by Marcus, Tali and Garrus joining in a group hug; they had stuck with each other the longest, and therefore had the strongest bond. When they seperated it was out of reluctance. Garrus boarded the shuttle, followed by everyone else, with Tali just standing there and staring at it. Seeing that she wasn't getting on, he approached her and wrapped the quarian in a tight embrace, and she followed it, arms tight around him as she let the suitcase drop to the ground.
"I love you," she whispered.
"I love you too," he replied in an equal whisper, "Keelah Se'lai."
She pulled away and tapped her visor against his forehead, before reluctantly pulling away, picking up her suitcase, and slowly entering the shuttle, turning around at the last second as the hatch closed, and he stayed in view of her eyes through the observation window. He approached silently and placed his hand on the window, and she nodded to him without a word, placing her own hand over his behind the window, trying to touch each other, but failing. Tali could only watch, silent tears sliding down her cheeks, as the shuttle lifted off and shot out of the shuttle bay, leaving the Normandy behind.
It was the most painful ride in living memory.
"So this is it? The end of another chapter?"
- Reia'Inas pav Earth.
"Yes. Another chapter is officially over. But only after you've read the final page. And my story isn't quite over yet. The Reaper War. Its the most vital part."
- Marcus Shepard.
"Do tell."
- Reia'Inas pav Earth.
A/N:
Last chapter and epilogue tomorrow, and Requiem will be officially over. And so Holocaust will begin, and the Reaper War along with it. Its going to be the most epic of the series at this point, only beaten a bit by Ultimatum, which will be the final chapter. We're nearing the end, but not quite there.
Thank you my loyal fans, for hanging around as long as you can, and for those fresh and new, for reading on. You've given me the inspiration I need to continue, and I can only hope Holocaust is everything I hype it up to be.
Keelah Se'lai.