Thank you for all the kind words of support! ^.^

I'm in an academically advanced program in my school at the moment, so yeah… I'm under extreme pressure and it's not fun. But on a brighter note, my mid-terms are great.

*NOTE* this chap is supposed to be from Inuyasha's POV but for the sake of sticking to my original plotline, this will be in scattered points of views, so I apologize in advance if this causes any inconvenience.

Bitter or Sweet?

Disclaimer: I don't own smack

Chapter 22: Feel the Poison Set In

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

~Adele: Someone Like You

KAGOME'S POV

"You coward!" Eyes hard and blood rushing unusually to my head, I scream out the words, forcing my eyes to keep dry. "Look at me when I'm talking to you, you dirty bastard! Turn around, dammit!"

The boy reluctantly twists to face me, clearing uncomfortable. "What do you want?"

I get up right in his face, not caring in the slightest that with my unkempt hair and deep bags under my eyes, I probably looked like a mad woman. "Kikyo's not a nice girl. She can be the queen of bitches to the people who get on her bad side; I would know. As unpleasant as she is, she's a human being, just like everyone else, though I'm seriously debating whether you should even be counted as a part of that census after what you did. You destroyed her, you know that? You must be so freaking proud, aren't you? So elated that you've crushed your worst enemy to smithereens."

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories, they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

The newspaper boy tried to back up, clearly not enjoying being corned by a frazzled, emotionally wrecked freshman, but running out is not an option here.

He sees the determination on my face and nervously swivels his eyes around. "Look, if you're still mad about the article I wrote about you and Mr. Takahashi a while back-"

An irritated groan escapes my mouth. "You seriously think that's what this is about? I don't care about whether people think I'm dating Inuyasha or not, because I'm not. This is solely about Kikyo, and your chauvinistic desire to bring others below you for your own personal, twisted reprisal."

He winces. "Just let it go, will ya? It's not that big of a deal. Geez. Even if I hadn't written it, someone else would have eventually. This is the kind of stuff teenagers want to read about, okay? It's all a part of the high school experience."

"You are insufferable," I say, disgusted. "Just… don't make any copies. And do yourself and everyone else a favor by quitting the newspaper club."

As I move to walk away, he grabs my wrist clumsily.

"After the auction," he says, "Koharu came up to me and begged me to follow her to a fast food restaurant, telling me to bring my camera. So I did, and that's how I found you and Koharu. I wasn't sure whether to publish my piece or not, but Koharu was adamant. Apparently Kikyo had been treating her like dirt, though not palpably. She said that evil bitches needed to know what exclusiveness felt like. There was no way I could refuse."

I wrench my hand out of his grasp. "Your excuses mean nothing to me. I don't get care what Koharu did or didn't do, because ultimately, it was your choice to put that article out there for the whole school to see. Take responsibility for your own thoughtless actions."

Even with our fists held high
It never would've worked out right
We were never meant for do or die

INUYASHA'S POV

Her eyes snap open.

Blinking the brown orbs a few times to focus her vision, her gaze rests on my face, and she hurriedly sits up. "Inuyasha," she says, in a daze. "What are you…? Oh. I see." Her expression clouds over, eyes darkening.

"You remember everything, then? No amnesia to report?"

She smiles at my failed attempt at humor. "No need. Everything is… crystal clear. Painfully so." Her fingers absently pat down her bird-nest-like hair. "I suppose I should've seen it coming. No bad deed goes unpunished, right? I've been lying to myself and the rest of the word for years now. It's finally all over. I can finally be an ordinary girl."

A smirk twitches at my lips. "And by ordinary you mean… bitchy? Impatient? Rude? Hair and nails not constantly perfect?"

A scowl passes over for a second, and then she laughs. "Yes to all of the above." She cranes her neck. "Where are we?"

"Infirmary. You won't get pelted by rocks here, at least." I growl. "I swear, if anyone attempts to pull off a stunt like that again, so help me, or I"ll-"

"Oh, don't rip their throats out, Inu-baby," she croons, making my ears press flat against my head.

"Don't call me that!"

Kikyo blinks innocently. "You let Kagome call you Yasha, though? How is Inu-baby any different?"

I flick her temple lightly. "Those are two completely different nicknames. One is tolerable and the other is simply disturbing on many different levels."

A soft grin replaces her wolfish leer. "You always did have a soft spot for Kagome… I guess if anyone could get away with calling you something embarrassing, it would be her. Try as you may, you can't stop her from getting under your skin. She's already in so deep that you can't pull her out now anyhow."

I almost groan. "Let's leave Kagome out of this."

She looks up at me restlessly. "Why? We should be able to talk about her calmly and reasonably as a couple…. That is, unless you have lingering feelings for her."

"Why are you doing this, Kikyo?" I whisper tiredly. "What could you possibly hope to achieve from what you're setting up here?"

I didn't want us to burn out
I didn't come here to hurt you

Now I can't stop

"I'm not hoping to achieve anything, Inuyasha. For the first time in my life, this isn't about me. It's about you and about what you want. What do you want, Yasha? Tell me. Because if we can work something out between us and what we have… I would love that. But I don't want you to make a rash decision and give in to your emotions like you did when you asked me out. Or rather, forced me out."

When she says 'Yasha' I wince, eyes pivoting away. The only people who call me that are Rin and Kagome. Hearing it from Kikyo just sounds… wrong. As if I'm just a heartless bastard stringing on two girls at the same time because I can't decide between them. "I want this to work out too, Kikyo," I say, voice cracking.

"Do you?"

I have to put in physical effort to look her in the eyes again. And then I just shatter.

Kikyo's always been so flawless- in every department.

But for the first time, I was seeing her as not perfect; in fact, in all honestly, she looked like hell: her eyes were baggy, skin far too pale and blanches, hair tangled, scrapes and gashes marring her body. And yet, she looked more beautiful than I'd ever seen her before.

How could I hurt a girl in her most vulnerable moments? I couldn't… wouldn't. I owe it to her.

"Stop it," Kikyo snaps. "Quit staring at me like that. Like you pity me or something." The word is spat out bitterly. "I don't want you to choose me because you feel obligated to. It should be because you want to. From the bottom of your heart. All this time, I thought to myself, if Kagome can find some way to let you go, you'd be mine. But that's not the issue here, is it? It's you who's holding all the strings right now. The only person who can determine the outcome of this mess is you. So hurry up and decide!"

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road

Someone's gotta go

"I don't understand," I say brokenly. "What are you telling me to say?"

"Think of it this way. Which would be more painful- my death, or Kagome's?"

I let out an indignant bark. "You did not seriously just ask me that. You know I can't answer something as crude as-"

"Oh, spare me the martyr crap. Just give me an answer."

I set my jaw stubbornly, and she sighs.

"Fine. Let's do this instead: tell me what you love about me, and what you love about Kagome. Let's go from there."

It's not the easiest topic to approach but this option is more doable. "I love that you're independent and strong and beautiful, though not in the way you think. I love you when you're yourself, and not some untouchable, unreachable prefect that everyone idolizes. That's not the Kikyo I know. Not the one who can hold her head up high even when the whole school has turned its back on her."

Kikyo doesn't even shift. "Now Kagome."

Where to begin… "Kagome's definitely special, in her way. She, like you said, has a way of getting under your skin before you even realize it. She's always putting up a brave font because she couldn't possibly burden the people she loves with her pains and worries, but expects everyone else to lean on her. She has the most terrible mood swings, is too hard of a romantic, and doesn't know what's good for her when it comes down to it, but… she fills up the spaces of a person that he or she lacks. Once she has you wrapped around her finger… It's all over…"

Tears slip down her cheeks, and Kikyo quickly pushes them away. "Well, I think it's pretty clear who's won. You don't need me. Not the way you need Kagome. The emotion you hold for me? The one you claim is love? It's called respect, Inuyasha. You don't love me."

But I do. I do.

And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on

So I'm already gone

"We've already establishes how prominent my selfishness is, haven't we?" she interjects rather hastily. "I'd like to let you know that I've never EVER been rejected before in my life. And I'm not about to let it happen now." She takes a big, shaky breath, and a slivery smile is pasted onto her face. "Goodbye, Inuyasha."

I nod, slowly. She wanted to break up with me before I had a chance to, and that was fine. But I didn't want Kikyo completely out of my life. I cared about her, deeply, whether she believed it or not. It was too greedy, and I was in no position to ask something so difficult of her, but maybe one day… One day…

Kikyo straightens up, and leans forward, hands gently caressing the sides of my face as she lightly presses her lips to mine, the contact chaste and so unlike her.

She's the one to back away, eyes no longer watery, but still remained shimmery under the florescent lights. "I'm not going to transfer," she says. "I've decided to stop running away from any and everything that frightens me. I'll fight this. I'll get through it all. I'm… how did you phrase it again? Independent, strong, and beautiful? Well, I second that. And I'll kick the ass of anyone who dares challenge me." A powerful, glowing smile lights up her whole face. She's more gorgeous than she'll ever know.

Looking at you makes it harder
But I know that you'll find another
That doesn't always make you want to cry

"I'm going to have to hold you to that, Kikyo."

"Make sure you do."

"I love you."

She looks startled for a moment, then she smiles. "I love you, too," she whispers.

KAGOME'S POV

"Kikyo?"

I turn around. There stands a towering man with shoulder-length dark hair, and sapphire eyes, a fur coat draped over his shoulders. There was a pen strapped to the breast pocket of his clean, pressed white dress shirt, and his onyx shoes were polished to perfection. His nametag read, Dr. Onigumo

"Um, no, sorry. You have the wrong girl. Might I ask why you're looking for Kikyo?"

He scrutinizes my face, then leans away, obviously displeased with my simplicity. "I heard she collapsed, so naturally, I drove to her school as quickly as possible. I'm here to attend to her."

"I would think she's already been treated in the infirmary by now, but you can check if you wish to make certain."

Dr. Onigumo makes a face. "No! I'm going to be the one to treat lady Kikyo! No one else can touch her but me!"

I back away. "Who called you in the first place? Everything's already been taken care of."

"I'm the prestigious Naraku Onigumo. Esteemed aesthetic surgeon and family doctor."

Aesthetic? "You're Kikyo's plastic surgeon?"

He looks shocked; taken aback. "How do you know that?" he hisses. Then he gets in close, grabbing me by my collar and snarling in my face. "You better keep your mouth shut, little school girl, or I'll make sure that Kikyo destroys you."

I cock a brow, pushing him off me. "The whole school knows."

"When I'm through with you, I swear-"

"I didn't expose her. The word spread through the school newspaper. It was beyond her control."

The rather confused doctor slumps to the ground.

"Uh, are you alright…?"

Tears give his eyes a shiny appearance. "It's all over for Miss Kikyo!" he wails despairingly. "All that's she worked so hard to create… it's all been crushed! Whatever will she do? How is she dealing? I must be there for her in her darkest hours! What am I doing sitting here like a fool? Take me to her at once!"

"With all due respect, Doctor… I think maybe she needs a little more time to herself. Besides, Kikyo's a very tough girl. She can handle herself better than most."

He glares at me with such menace that I uncomfortably step back once more. "And what do you know?" he yells at me. "What could you possibly know about Miss Kikyo? I've been by her side all her life, start to finish, and have witnessed all the perils she's had to face. You can't even fathom how much she's been through!"

"Maybe not, but who are you to stand here and lecture me when you have no idea what I've been through?" I snap.

"Do you think she hates me now?"

I open my mouth to retort a snarky response, then close it. "Wait, what?"

"I only operated on her because it was her wish. She's always been beautiful, every since she was a child. But she was so insecure all the time that I would have done anything to see her wonderful smile. If only I'd known long before how much pain my actions would have ended up causing her… I love Kikyo so dearly. I would rather hack off a limb then watch anyone hurt a hair on her head."

I shudder. Hack off a limb, he says. Nasty. "You're in love with Kikyo?"

"Ever since I laid eyes on her, I knew she was the one. She doesn't know it, but she means more to me than anything else in the world."

"Go tell her, then."

He gives me a dirty look. "What, are you out of your mind? I don't deserve someone like Kikyo. I can't bother her with a silly, unworthy confession. I'm happy just seeing her lovely face. If I can make her laugh once in a while, I'll die a happy man. Besides… she's thirteen years younger than me. It would never work."

"You're never going to get anywhere with a mindset like that. If you love her, that should be enough. If Kikyo never sees you as a man, it'll be all your fault because you were too scared to take the risk, too scared of rejected. Suck up, be a man, and profess your eternal love. If even then she turns you down, well, at least you know you tried."

"And I'm getting relationship counseling from…?"

"Kagome. My name's Kagome."

"Ah, Kagome, what a horrid name. What about you? Do you have anyone you hold dear to your heart?" When I don't say anything, he smirks. "Looks like we have a case of severe hypocrisy. How can you urge me forward, telling me to go after what I want when you can't even do so yourself?" Naraku tosses his black locks over his shoulder. "So, who is this mystery man?"

I square my shoulders. "He belongs with someone else. He deserves to be happy with her. What we have… It's practically nonexistent at this point."

Started with a perfect kiss then

We could feel the poison set in
Perfect couldn't keep this love alive

He snorts, turning sharply on his heels and makes a beeline straight for the infirmary, where his queen slumbers. "Just remember, if things don't work out, you only have yourself to blame all 'cause you didn't suck up, be a man, and profess your undying love… Because you were too scared to take a risk and too cowardly to face rejection."

I laugh quietly. How right he is.

You know that I love you so,

I love you enough to let you go

INUYASHA'S POV

When I enter the small, quaint apartment that I've recently begun to call 'home,' I find my mother sprawled across the floor of the front entrance.

I blanche and immediately drop down beside her, caging her pale, thin face between my much larger hands, lighting tapping her cheeks. "Mom! Mom! Mom, wake up! Mom!"

It isn't until much later, after being placed on a hospital bed with an oxygen mask strapped to her head, does she open her eyes.

She turns hazily to glance at me. She tries to say something, but realizes the object preventing her from doing so, and frowns. She pulls off the contraption. "Baby, what am I doing here?"

My brows furrow and fists tighten. "You collapsed, Mom."

My mom looks incomprehensive. "I did? Huh, I don't recall."

I slam my fist down onto the bed. "Stop it! You have got to start taking better care of yourself! I can't always be around to protect you…"

Her eyes lower to her folded hands. "You're right, Yasha. But I'm always so lonely…. Your father is so busy trying to pay off the mortgage and hospital bills, as is Sesshomaru. He acts so distant and cold but he cares for this family as much as I do. And you… because of me, you can never truly let anyone in. We're always moving far too much for you to completely get settled. We're falling apart, and it's all because of my stupid sickness."

"Don't say that. Don't ever say something so reckless. How is this your fault? It's the dumb doctors' faults because no one can seem to find a cure. Every single time we get notified that there might be a doctor in a certain area who can help you, they never do. It's like running around in circles."

She shakes her head. "Nevertheless, you're young. You should be focusing on your studies and career… heck, even girls. You shouldn't have to tail me around all the time." She pauses and takes a breath. "The meds that the doctors have prescribed me here have stopped working for me a little while ago. I saw how much more fun you seemed to be having here compared to America or the others places we've been so I thought… as long as I'm careful, I should be alright, right?" She sees my horrified look. "Yeah, I know, it was stupid. But I didn't want to uproot you yet again. I guess it was the wrong thing to do because my body ended up giving out, and that's how you found me."

"How could you pull such an empty-minded stunt? What if you'd died?"

My mom ignores the comment. "This time, they're suggesting a hospital in North America. Canada. And I want you to stay here. One of my friends agreed to taking you in."

"Kagome's mom?"

"No. No, I didn't tell her about my… circumstances. I love her dearly, and she already has enough drama to deal with. She is to never find out about this. If she knew, she would try to help us desperately, and we both know she doesn't have to financial support to do so."

I know my mom has good intentions for me. She protects everyone she loves. But I've already found my resolve. "Mom, I'm not staying here. I'm going with you. Even if it's to the ends of the earth, I will always be there for you. You need me. And it's fine if I'm unable to make friends or get married or whatever else you're worried about. Family comes first. We stick together, forever and always."

Tears leak from her eyes and slide down her cheeks. "I do need you. And that's what makes me so pathetic. I know you're tired of hearing my apologies-"

"I am. So stop saying them. You shouldn't be sorry for anything. When do we leave?"

"Tomorrow."

I want you to know that it doesn't matter where we take this road

Someone's gotta go

And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

KAGOME'S POV

"Seriously?" Ayame laughs. "Wait, what did you say his name was, again? Narapoo?"

"Naraku. And yeah, it's crazy, isn't it? I don't know if Kikyo accepted his confession or whatnot, but I guess we'll figure it out sooner or later."

Sango nudges me in the ribs. "So, you okay? With what happened to Kikyo and everything, you must be seriously distraught. How did you keep all that a secret from us? Why didn't you call the second you got back from WacDonalds?"

"It's just… I needed some time to recoup, I suppose. My head was like pounding after all the info Kikyo fed to me. I was hoping you guys wouldn't be too mad."

Ayame shrugs. "We're not. But we're definitely confused. So basically, we were right and Kikyo is evil and not the angel she pretends to be. Then she was caught red-handed talking about it all to you because she was trying to get you to give up Inuyasha, and was published in the newspaper. Then her followers got mad and threw rocks at her. The end? Nothing else we've missed?"

"That's about it. If there's anything else, I myself am not aware."

"Does this mean we have to be all nice to Kikyo from now on?" Ayame groans. "Gods, I hate that bitch with a passion."

Sango sighs. "This is what Kagome wants, Aya. Let's support her. I think she knows what she's doing. But I'm through talking about secrets and lies. Let's discuss something far more important: what are you going to wear on your date with Bankotsu on Saturday?"

I blink owlishly. "I'd forgotten all about that. Oops."

They both maul my arms. "WHAT? How could you forget something so important?" they yelp. "We've never really noticed him, but isn't he uber hot? And he has his eyes all over you!"

I wave them off. "I'm thankful to him, but I doubt we're going to have anything serious. It's just a casual one-time thing. We're just outing as friends. And what about you guys? Cough, cough, Miroku and Koga."

Sango flushes. "Miroku and I made up… Yesterday, he, um, came to my door with peonies… But instead of ringing the doorbell, he tried to climb up to my bedroom and almost fell off my window ledge and killed himself. But I thought it was sweet so I forgave him for being a douche."

I sigh. Sango and Miroku will definitely make some beautiful babies in the near future. "Ayame, your turn." My eyebrows shoot up when she turns a little pink as well.

"Actually, I think Koga's not my type. He seemed fun and everything, but he's so casual around me that we're probably only ever going to be friends. I was little stricken at first because, come on, it wasn't the first time a guy has decided I'm not girlfriend-material, but… There's this guy in my English class. His name is Hiten and he's, like, the first guy who hasn't treated be like a bro. So we're going out next Friday after school." She smiles quirkily. "He says he loves watching horror movies more than I do, so for once, it won't be the boy cowering behind me."

Sango grins cheekily and slaps Ayame on the back. "Good going, girl. Hiten is super cute and really popular among the freshmen. He just might be worthy of you. But I have to say I'm disappointed you and Koga didn't work out. He seemed to have interest in you and you two just clicked really well together…"

Ayame yawns, stretching her arms. "I guess, but waiting for him to make a move is like waiting for rain in a drought."

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong

We stop walking and arrive at my house. I'm surprised to find my mom and Izayoi hugging, both shedding tears. Disturbing? Very much so.

Behind them, stood Inuyasha, expression unreadable.

Sango and Ayame, quickly catching on, slip silently out the door.

Once they leave, Inuyasha advances. "Can I talk to you?"

I eye the two women, talking way too fast for me to understand. I nod, and follow him into my room.

He doesn't speak for a while. But he glances at my alarm clock and quickly says, "I'm moving, Kagome."

I was expecting as much. The suitcases by the foyer kind of gave it away. "Again? Where?"

He tightens his lips, looking uncomfortable. "I'm moving to Canada."

Time stops, and my head reels. For a good two minutes, I am unable to think of anything to say. I eventually force out a half-hearted: why?

"It's not because of you or Kikyo. It's because of my mom. She needs more fresh air. Japan is too crowded and there's not even much wildlife around… it's bad for her health. So we're leaving. Today. I would've told you sooner, but I was informed last minute myself."

He searches my face, but I can't even think straight, let alone talk. He smiles wanly and moves towards the door.

"You two will be fine," I blurt out. He turns around slowly. "You and Kikyo care about each other strongly. I know for sure that you guys will be able to handle a long-distance relationship because of how deep your understanding of one another is. I truly believe that."

He looks dryly amused. "You really are a romantic, Kagome," he says lightly. "And thanks for the wise words of advice, but we broke up."

I choke on air. Smooth.

He continues, "You're smart, beautiful, and kind. I already know you'll accomplish anything you want to do. I know I didn't show it, but I was happy to have met you and to have gotten to know you. You're one of the few people who could tolerate my shortcomings and Bankotsu is lucky to have you. You're probably the best friend I've ever had, so I'm sorry that I won't be able to graduate with you."

It's only when Inuyasha reaches out and brushes a tear off my cheek that I realize I'm crying.

I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone

He leans down and presses his lips to my forehead, light as a feather.

The cold awakening that I will never see Inuyasha again slaps me hard across the face. I reach into my pocket and bring out Kirara's present: the golden heart necklace. "I know it's girly and stupid and that you'll probably never wear something so gaudy, but please take it." I shove the trinket into his hands. "Bye Inuyasha," I manage to whisper, unable to look at him without wavering.

He looks startled by my sudden gift, but accepts it graciously.

Giving me one more apologetic look, he walks away from me… every step seeming like a mile.

"We'll still talk, won't we?" I call out, voice coming out strangled and desperate.

He doesn't turn around. "Of course we will," he responds. "I'll keep in touch."

But from the hesitant choppiness of his words, a seed of doubt planted itself into my mind.

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

And I was right; I didn't hear from Inuyasha again.

AN: don't kill me, please!

I know the cliffie is evil, but you'll just have to trust in me :)

The song used in this chapter is Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson (listen to it while reading ^^). I never specified exactly which characters the song is directed towards, so you guys take your pick. Whew! Song-fics are actually pretty difficult to write for me.

I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to form the next chap because I know what I have to include but not sure how to write it… But this story is coming is wrapping up, so I'm guessing… around four more chapters? Give or take a few.

Until next time, which is… um, not too far into the future? Haha I'll do my best.

~Nyony

Daichi: Oh my gosh, I have like a string of curse words I would like to say because of the unfulfilling feeling I have after reading this, not only in English but in Spanish too! (Did I ever mention I was Hispanic?)

Well, anyway, apart from the ending, it was perfect. I loved the incorporation of Already Gone (How did you know I loved that song?) and you did great. This better be one of those "leave-now-but-reunite-later" kind of things!

BTW, there was a word here that maybe some of you didn't catch and a definition might help!

Number one: Reprisal-Forcible seizure of an enemy's goods or subjects in retaliation for injuries inflicted.

So what does this mean in context? It means that Koharu wanted Kikyo's business thrown about to get back at her. End of story!

REVIEW PEOPLE! NYONY WILL WRITE IF YOU FEED HER REVIEWS!