Author's Note: Thanks to all my lovely readers, especcially those who follow and comment. It means the world to me. When I start to get self-conscious, you all are there to give me a confidence boost.

Dean is still catching his breath, clutching at Cas' naked hips.

"Holy Crap, that was awesome." he says with eyes closed.

"I agree. And I have been witness to truly awe-inspiring moments." Cas sounds amused and a little breathless himself.

Dean catches a glimpse of them in the bathroom mirror at an angle and starts blushing. He feels very exposed all of the sudden. He rubs his thumbs back and forth over Cas' hard cut hipbones and pulls back.

Cas is watching him closely, waiting for him to freakout. Dean pushes down the thought of what his dad would think of him.. still a knee jerk reaction on most days. The small smile he'd repressed comes back and he slowly leans in to peck Cas on the lips.

It isn't a declaration or promise but at least he isn't going to be a douche-bag and try to spin this on Cas. He called him.

Cas let his knit eyebrows smooth and smiled too. "Incidentally, you taste like chocolate."

Dean is surprised into laughter and Cas cuts it off with a kiss.

KNOCK! KNOCK!

"Do you want me to take you to your motel room?" Cas asks in his ear.

"Nah, we might be in town a little longer. Don't want to spook the locals by pulling a disappearing act."

Cas nods.

"But maybe.. um" Dean gestures between them to the clinging white mess.

"Of course."

Once he's righted his clothing, Dean takes a breath and opens the door. There's his waitress(Mandy? Maggy?) and a balding round guy in a blue polo and khakis. He has "General Manager" on his name tag.

"Is there a problem in here, Sir?"

Dean points up at the dark bulb. "Yeah, there's a problem. Damn light blew. I coulda fallen and sued,ya know.

The now pissy waitress stomps past him.

"Where is he?"

"Who?"

"Your twink boyfriend in the suit."

"Megan!" The manager looks embarrassed and probably worried about a lawsuit.

"Excuse me?" He got a little nauseous at her wording, but couldn't help finding the fact that she thought Castiel was a twink hilarious. If she only knew.

She slammed open the two stall doors and turn on him huffily.

"I know you two were-"

"I'm so sorry, Sir. Is there anything we can do for you?"

"Yeah, you can call me a cab." He walks out into the hallway. "And get that light fixed. It's a safety hazard."

When he came through the door, Sam was already asleep so he fell into bed with his clothes on. He was out before the feeling of stubble-burn on his cheek faded.

Dean woke up from Sam's kick to his leg.

"Hey. Planning on gettin' up today?"

His brother was already dressed and had a Dunkin' Donuts coffee in his hand.

Dean groans. "Please tell me there's donuts."

"There's donuts."

"Sweet Jesus, Sam, you can be taught."

When Dean reluctantly made his head leave the pillow, he heard Sam laugh.

"Son of a bitch, how'd you do it?"

"What are you talkin' about?"

Sam pointed at his own neck on the right side.

"The waitress left a lovebite."

Dean touches his neck and winces at the sensitive spot. He rolls to the other side of the bed and gets up to see it in the bathroom mirror. Sure enough, there's a dark purple mark. His mirror self is getting flushed as he rubs two fingers over it. Cas gave him this to remind him. Maybe so in the light of day he couldn't hide from what he'd done last night.. or who he'd done it with.

"You into this girl?" Sam asked skeptically from behind him.

Dean jumped, looking guilty. "What? Who?"

"Megan?" Ah, pissy bitch from last night.

"Nah, we just had some fun." Cas sucking. Cas licking. Biting down to make what he's trying not to stare at in the mirror.

Sam leaves him to shower off the night before. When he walks out in a towel to grab some fresh clothes, he almost trips and gives the room a show. Cas is sitting in one of the motel room's two chairs, across from Sam, flipping through his dad's journal ideally.

Cas looks up and his eyes immediately latch on to his neck. He swallows. "What are you doing here?" That might have come out a bit too loud.

"Cas told you he would come by in the morning last night. You were too busy making sweet love to your dessert." Sam snickered.

Kinda hard to concentrate when someone's stroking your dick under the table. Dammit, he wasn't expecting to see him so soon. Especially not half-naked in front of his brother.

"Hello, Dean." Cas said and looked at his neck again.

"Hi Cas-Castiel." He smiled awkwardly and forces his widened eyes to the floor quickly. Once he's able to, he looks up to see Cas' raise his eyebrows, press his lips together and go back to thumbing through the book.

Sam. Shit. What the fuck was he doing. Just go! He grabs some clothes and hurries to the bathroom before he says or does anything else weird.

He got dressed and managed to get out the door with Cas without hoisting a rainbow flag for Sam.

"So where are we heading?"

With a touch of two fingers, he turns around to an open clearing in a quiet forest.

"We are here."

"Where's here?"

"Oregon. Now I believe if we start you with fighting in a controlled environment with me, eventually you will be able to cope with outside threats without succumbing to madness."

"I'm sorry, are we just gonna pretend we didn't bump uglies last night?"

"Bump uglies?"

"Yeah your ugly bumped my ugly.."

"You thought I was ugly?"

"No Cas I mean-"

"Because I didn't think you were ugly."

Dean feels his face heat. Thanks..It's um just an expression anyway. Trust me, you weren't ugly."

Cas frowns and says "I have read that you might need time to process the change in our relationship. I am giving you your 'space'."

"Okay I don't even want to know where that came from and we're not in a relationship."

Cas frowned. "This is why I wanted to concentrate on our sparring for today. We need to get you close to the edge and then teach you to withdraw."

"I'm starting to get a Luke and Yoda vibe here."

"Focus, Dean." Cas says impatiently.

"Kinda hard to do when our little cage matches always turn handsy." His ears are burning and he doesn't quite know who he's angry at.

"Are you saying you do not enjoy my hands?" Cas got this one and he's smiling as he makes eye contact.

"Obviously Not." How is he supposed to just roll around in the dirt with Cas after he let him touch his dick. How can he concentrate on fighting and channeling his crazy? He can feel Cas' eyes on him but can't quite make himself meet them.

"Okay."

"Okay? Okay what?"

"Since you are so ambivalent about what we did, I will give you time to think about it. I will not touch you in that way until you ask me to. Now can we continue without you being preoccupied by my hands?"

Dean sighs and rolls his eyes.

"Dean, this is about you learning to handle your problem-"

"Yeah okay let's do this already."

They start by circling each other. Cas tells him to try and hit him. At first Dean is half-heartedly looking for an opening. This is hard to take seriously. He goes for a right jab and ends up on his ass. Cas is waiting behind him. Dean shakes it off and dives for him again. Again he is on the ground. After about the tenth time of not connecting with anything and Cas playing purely defensive.. he's starting to get pretty damn frustrated. They continue this way for maybe another hour and Dean can feel his jaw grinding when he gets up this time. Cas seems to be perfectly happy to do this all day.

"What the fuck are we doing?"

"You are trying and failing to hit me."

"Yeah Cas I fucking got that." He's beginning to reeeally want to catch him. Just once.

Another hour later and he is crawling out of his skin. It's like a starving man seeing a steak but it's just out of reach.

The next time the angel moves out of his punch, Dean pulls back at the last second. Cas is just a second too slow to step away and Dean jumps on him. Dean straddles his legs and punches him across the face twice.. Cas let's him. Dean lowers his arm and tries to see past the want to hurt for a second. There's a cut high up on Cas cheek and he didn't heal it. Dean fixates on it and bends down to lick the line of blood off. Dean shutters and closes his eyes.

"You are making it very hard not to touch you, Dean." The red tinge to his thoughts abates a bit and they turn a different way.

Dean puts his palms on Cas chest and rubs his groin over his. Cas just passively stays on his back, arms at his sides. Dean kisses him hard and Cas is unresponsive.

"Dammit, Cas!"

"You know what I want you to say."

Dean lets out an exasperated growl and sit ups. Cas just looks at him with his best blank-face.

"Fine, goddammit, I liked it." He bites the inside of his cheek to focus his thoughts. "I liked it and I'd really like to do it again if you'd stop being bitchy already. So will you please.. " He doesn't have the balls to put words how he liked it all. Not just getting off because that's obvious and easy.. but everything Cas is making him feel when they start to play their weird control games.

Cas reaches up to grab the side of his face and pull him down. Dean happily dips his head. After a quick kiss, Cas pushes Dean off to sit on the ground next to him, then turns to grab him under the knees. Dean is suddenly on his back with Cas above him. Another deep, hard kiss and he pulls back. Dean follows his mouth up until he's pushed back down to the ground by a hand in the middle of his chest.

"Do you think you deserve redemption, Dean? Have you earned this?"

Dean's mind was already starting to fog over with lusty thoughts and it took great effort to get out his, "huh?"

Cas leans down to give him one more kiss before he says from a gasp away, "Keep your hands flat on the grass until I tell you not to."

He moves up and shifts so he's sitting on Dean's chest. Dean can't help being nervous but also hard from excitement. He lowers his arms and slowly opens his fists, keeping eye contact the whole time.

"Good."

Cas' knees are bent on either side of his torso. It's overwhelming and also comforting. Cas is unbuckling his belt.. unzipping his pants..

He's so close and told not to move. If someone told Dean he would ever want to touch another dick this bad he would have laughed. Well punched them, then laughed.

Cas pulls out his cock over his boxers. He wasn't really looking at it last night.. trying his best to just go with the good feelings and not bolt. Now he gazes up at Cas, looking down at him with such surety. He breaks away from his eyes and checks him out.

Head pink, almost the color of Cas' lips. Longer than him but thinner. He's hard and twitching a little. After giving Dean his minute to inspect, his hand grasps it firmly. Holy crap, he isn't going to..

Dean gasps when Cas starts stroking himself above him. His pink head is squeezed tight before he jerks back down. His eyes close for a moment before he meets Dean's again. Shit, this was so freaking hot. Dean's fingers are twitching to grab him somewhere or at least to rub his own painful erection.

Cas inhales sharply. He's trapped in his jeans with no friction because Cas is too high up on his body. Dean frowns and lets his head fall back to the ground but almost immediately lifts it up the little bit to see Cas biting his damned chapped lips. Dean can't help arching upwards involuntarily even though there's nothing there to relieve him.

Cas meets his eyes from underneath half-lidded ones and doesn't hesitate his stroking at all when he says, "Remember not to move your hands."

Dean wishes he could just reach up and hold his hips. He forces out a breath he'd been holding for too long and makes himself continue to be still. Cas smiles down at him and lets his eyelids close for a second. His head falls back and he's rocking his legs forward a little over his chest.

It's agony to be so close and have to be still, but Cas told him too.. and that makes it even better.

Cas' breathing hitches and he breathes out, "Deeean." He grips his own pants leg as he cums into his fist.

Dean gulps and tries to get air. Cas slowly comes down and looks into Dean's eyes from above him. Cas reaches forward to Dean's cheek and wipes the warm sticky mess on it. Then the other cheek. Finally across his parted lips.

Dean closes his eyes tight and makes a pained noise.

"I should leave you here like this." Cas' voice seems even deeper than usual and makes his whole body tingle. Dean is shocked and so fucking turned on he's going to beg if Cas doesn't touch him or let him touch himself. He'd hump the hard ground if he could get some relief.

"Tell me you want this."

"Fuck do I want this." Dean says too quickly.

"Tell me you want me."

Dean has to swallow and sucks his bottom lip clean.

"I want you."

Cas moves down to kiss him and licks his mouth. He smiles bigger than Dean has ever seen him and crawls backwards down Dean's body languidly. Dean keeps his arms at his sides just in case.

Cas looks up at him from between his legs and takes his cock out of his jeans. Seeing Cas hold him like he was just beating himself.. Over Dean's face. Into his hands.. to rub his fucking cum.. He can feel it cooling on his cheeks.

Cas only had to tug him upwards maybe four times before it's too much and Dean's lost. He rides it out and his fingers claw at the grass beneath him, digging deep rows. He's staring up at the blue sky, just breathing, when Cas is above him again. He brings his thumb up to his mouth with some of Dean's cum and licks it clean.

"Holy shit, what kinda porn are you watching, Cas?"

Cas just smiles and kisses him.