Chapter Forty-Four: Onto a New Path

1303 Hours, March 24, 2558. City of Redwood Falls, Planet Khan. "The Return," Outer Colonies. Day Thirty-Four of the Dawn of the Prometheans

After finding Travis alive down on the beach, Major Harris's battalion and I spent several more days on Qamar looking for any others that may have survived the explosion, while the remainder of the regiment returned to the camp. After six days of searching, however, and no indication that there was anyone else left alive, it was time for us to call it quits. It seemed my brother was the lone survivor of that one, a circumstance I was sure he was both thankful for and saddened about at the same time.

I'd been the one with the unpleasant task of informing him while he continued his recovery in the field hospital on the mainland once we got back. Needless to say, he hadn't taken it well.

"Fuck, Natalie," he said to me through blurred vision. "That was my team. My whole fucking team...and the others..." He shut his eyes hard and put a hand to his face. "Why me? Out of all those people, why did I make it out and not them?"

As I sat beside him on one of the small plastic bedside chairs I was very familiar with by now, I took his hand and squeezed. "I don't know, Trav. I had it happen to me once, too. Six years ago on Heath, in the battle where I got my back barbecued...I found out I was the only one who made it out alive from my entire platoon. Over thirty Marines wiped out, just like that - everyone I knew. I asked myself the same questions then, and I never found any answers. It was painful and tough, and it took me a long time to come to terms with that." I squeezed his hand again in reassurance. "But somehow, you'll get through. In the meantime, if you need someone to talk to, I'm here."

Travis nodded then, but I could tell he wasn't ready to cross that bridge just yet. After a week in the hospital, his wounds - four broken ribs, a broken arm, and fractured left patella - were healing up just fine, but I knew the real hurt was mental. And those scars were a lot tougher to mend.

That was two days ago. Since then, my little brother had been transferred to the medical wing on the Excalibur - along with most of the regiment and our supplies. The only ones of us still left planetside were me, Willis, Matt, and Heat, since we'd be needing a ride up to the boat soon and my husband couldn't fly. The two men kept their distance at all times, though, with Captain Heat mostly waiting around by his Pelican while Willis and Matt helped me finish up some last minute tasks before we left.

"I think that's the last of it," I said, zipping up my duffel bag from the command quarters in the staging camp - now nothing but an expanse of empty buildings. I threw the bag behind my shoulder and started walking off in the direction of the Pelican with Willis. "You got everything?"

"Yeah," my husband replied. "I packed up earlier this morning. I'm ready to get out of here."

"Me, too," I said.

As we walked along, however, I thought again of everything I'd be leaving behind here. I'd lost my aide just a week ago to the fighting, a young man who was a great Marine, a loyal ally, and a good person. I'd lost thirty-nine other Marines whose deaths I'd ordered directly, something I'd have to cope with and live with for the rest of my life. Then there were the tens of other men and women under my command who'd give their lives fighting on this planet, both in the earlier battles on the mainland, and later out on the island.

I'd also lost my best friend here on Khan, just over two months ago. I'd never see Oliver Hayden again. The thought hit me hard and my eyes welled up for a moment, and I suddenly felt ten times worse for Oliver's wife. She'd had to come here, excited to see her husband, only to learn that he'd been torn from her just weeks before they could reunite. If I was his friend and feeling like this, I could only imagine what she continued to go through at his loss. I guess on the trip back to Earth Courtney would have plenty to think about - and plenty of time to look for the words she'd have to say to their sons when she got home.

It was almost a task I'd had to do for my own kids, but so much had happened since Willis's crash that I just couldn't dwell on that, too. I had to draw the line somewhere or I'd be consumed with sadness. And I couldn't be - not when Earth was safe thanks to our actions, and not when I still had my husband and my brother with me, both hurt but alive and healing fast.

We were getting closer to the bird now, and I suddenly dropped my duffel in the red dirt and stopped. Willis came to a halt, too, and threw me a questioning look.

"Coop? You okay?"

"Yeah," I said softly. "Just thinking."

"About what?"

"Everything we lost here. Everything I won't be connected to anymore now that we're going home."

My husband released a sigh. "You're not happy we're leaving?"

"Yes and no. I don't really want to be here anymore, but in some ways, it feels...wrong to leave."

"How?"

"I lost my friend here, Will. And my aide, and a lot of other Marines. Their lives were my responsibility. I carry that."

"You also nearly died a couple months ago," he reminded me. "And so did I. I'd like to get as far away from that particular collection of memories as I can."

I shook my head. "That's not the point. With Laraza still here and in charge...I feel like we're leaving the job unfinished here for the civvies, too."

Clearly exasperated with me but trying to remain patient, my husband took a step closer and put his hands on both my shoulders as he looked me in the eyes. "Natalie, you did everything, and I mean everything, you could for these people. You even just saved them - from the ex-Covies and the Prometheans. They've shown time and time again that they want no part in that. Hell, they tried to fucking kill you. More than once. When we leave here, don't even give it a second thought."

He softened his words by pulling me into his arms then, and for a moment I closed my eyes and leaned into him, imagining that there was nothing else in the world. But I knew there was - so much more. I had the lives of fifteen hundred Marines on my shoulders, fifteen hundred men and women that I had to oversee and ensure remained alive for our next campaign. It was more than I'd had to bear before, and it made it difficult to ever think that I could be carefree - even for a moment - again.

Willis didn't know that, though, or seem to understand. I wondered if there was any way I could help him see.

"Will?"

"Yeah?"

"There's something else."

He pulled back a bit and looked at me. "What?"

I jerked my head a little in the direction of the Pelican. "As someone who's seen their best friend get killed - twice - I wanted to say something. I know it's not really my business, and he's your friend, but I think you should give Heat another chance. He's always been there for you, honey - and us. What he did was awful, but it was an honest mistake and you're okay now. Life's too short, you know?"

Willis let go of me in an instant and took a step back. "I'm okay now? I still can't fly, Natalie! And it's his damn fault! He took that from me! So no, I'm not ready to forgive him for that yet. And I don't know if I ever will be."

Surprised by his outburst, I just stood there a second and folded my arms across my chest, smiling sadly. "With all the lives we lost in this place, you think you'd have more respect for the fact that our time on this earth is finite. We see it every fucking day, Willis. By the time you decide you're good with all this, it might be too late. Don't get too comfortable in the fact that you'll always have Heat or me or anyone else around forever for you to make amends with. Because in the blink of an eye someone you love, someone you care about, could be gone - just like that. If I didn't know that before, I sure as hell relearned it here again in a big way."

I left my bag there for him to take to his buddy then and just walked off. I still had one more thing to get done before we left, and it didn't involve my husband - and I sure as hell didn't want to bring his attitude along with me.

As always, Matthew was the one to accompany me into the city, while Willis and Heat presumably waited by the Pelican. The younger Hawk walked beside me without a hint of anxiety this time, probably damped by his lengthy first experiences with combat now. I wanted to tell him not to get too confident, that it wasn't too late for the rebs to screw us over, but I didn't want to take his calm away from him. We'd been on edge enough the past few weeks - better that I take over that duty for both of us.

"I still don't get why you have to meet up with this guy - again," Matt said to me as we crossed the streets. "For all you know, he could just be waiting to finish you off now that's it's all over."

"True," I conceded. "But you have to remember that for a shitty mayor, he actually did us a lot of good. Without his extra troops, and especially without the ship, we'd be having a very different conversation right now." Or none at all, I added to myself.

"Well, yeah...but he also shot at you. Twice."

"Three times if you count the two bullets that went through me the first time," I corrected.

"Right. So you couldn't just send him a postcard or something? 'Thanks for the help, no thanks for all the lead'?"

I chuckled. "It's customary, kid. I'm in charge of groundside operations, so now that we're pulling out, I've got to go through all the motions with him and let him know it's done. Settled."

My brother-in-law just frowned. "Okay. I just hope it doesn't come back to bite you in the ass."

"Me, too, kiddo. Me, too."

Once again the designated meeting place was the town mayor/rebel leader's club, empty right now because of the time of day. Leaving Matthew outside, as always, I stepped in with nothing but my pistol strapped to my hip for protection, and I immediately jumped when I heard a gunshot ring out. I watched as the bullet pinged off the linoleum floor near my boots while my heart raced.

Then I heard the sound of Javier Laraza's rich laughter.

"Ah, Colonel. You should have seen the look on your face! You thought I was done trying to kill you, didn't you?"

Putting a hand subtly to my holster, I let out a snort. "Hardly. I haven't survived this long as a Marine by letting my guard down."

"Very wise."

I finally saw him step out of the shadows then, and the small smirk remained on his face. "But also entirely unnecessary."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You and your Marines are departing!" he exclaimed jubilantly. "That means I no longer have reason to kill you. I have gotten what I wanted, and so have you. We are not enemies anymore, my friend."

"I'm sorry to burst your bubble, Mr. Laraza, but you and I are not 'friends'. I flatlined for five minutes and had a heart attack the first time you tried to go after me. I don't call that being friendly." I took in a deep breath and sighed. "But, what I am here to do is to thank you. Without your help, and that of your ship and your men, we couldn't have gotten rid of the Prometheans and Storm on our own. So thanks."

Laraza set his weapon down on the bar counter now and stepped a little closer. "So this is the end, yes?"

"Yes, exactly how you wanted it. My superiors have agreed not to send anymore troops here once we're gone."

His smile broadened. "That is good. Very good, Cooper."

As I kept my eyes on him and with my hand still hovering over my holster, I watched as he went over behind the bar and stooped to pick something up. When he came back over, I saw that it was a sealed bottle of brandy - the same kind I'd had in his soundproof room the night I'd gotten drunk.

"Here. For your troubles. I'd like you to have this to remember Khan by."

As if I could forget, I thought, but I accepted the gift with a nod. I figured since the man had nearly killed me once and went and shot at me yet again, the least he could do was present me with a bottle of booze as apology.

I turned to go then, but just before I stepped out the door, I turned back. I looked at the mayor and said, "Take good care of your people, Laraza. We stepped in to help this time, but the destruction of the portals doesn't guarantee the Storm might not wander back into the neighborhood again or find something else of interest here. Stay safe. I have a feeling another war might be brewing soon."