After what could've been minutes or what could've been hours, he stood up, darkness already glowing around him.

Abruptly, he found himself in a small, dark bedroom. He turned to see a sleeping figure in a single bed. Unfeelingly, Cas took a step towards the bed, took the pillow from under Alistair's head and smothered his face with it. For half a minute, the man struggled, before stilling completely. Job done, Cas travelled back to 2021, to find Dean.

He materialised outside a bar in Kansas. It was a Saturday night, and he stood, watching the people inside enjoy their food and company. It was the complete opposite of the apocalyptic world they'd just been in. Cas had just saved all of these people. He used to get a warm feeling about that, but he didn't anymore. He waited until Dean and a couple of friends walked out, all laughing and joking warmly. They said their farewells and split off in different directions, Cas tailing Dean until they were out of sight of the bar.

"Dean," he announced. The man in question swivelled round, smiling in greeting already. This man was so different than the combat edged man Cas had just seen, lying on the floor dead. The other Dean would be on guard, always ready to fight. This Dean was trusting, and didn't even suspect an attack. Although, now he thought about it, the other Dean had also been trusting, once he had realised it was Castiel.

"Cas? You haven't dropped by in years."

In response, Castiel placed a hand on his forehead, connecting their minds.

He showed Dean his encounter with his alternate self, his recount of the mess the world had gotten into, the dead bodies, his brother's corpse...

"What the fuck?" Dean shouted, reeling back, and panting from the onslaught of memories, his smile completely wiped off his face.

"That is the last time we met."

"But... my mom, dad...Sam!" he almost sobbed.

"Do not be sad Dean. I went back in time and stopped it from happening."

Dean just glared at him, deciding the winged man wouldn't understand.

"I need your help Dean. Every time I stop an evil person from killing millions, another evil person crops up, and kills even more people. You have no history of evilness and mass wars to look back and learn from. I don't know how to solve this. It's never ending. The human race is obviously too self destructive to survive, and I've already given up a few times. The time I just showed you was the closest I got to killing everyone, but your other self got to me just in time. I can't live with the guilt, and I can't kill myself. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!" he shouted the last part desperately, wings shivering with emotions.

Dean nodded as Cas spoke. He already knew Castiel was struggling with this from the last time he dropped by, years ago. He realised his friend really needed him at that moment, and maybe humanity's fate counted on this conversation with Cas, and that completely sobered him up. He was in a completely different world from the world he'd been in with his friends just a couple of minutes ago in the bar.

"You just have to keep going, there's no way to fix it," he attempted. It didn't sound very inspiring.

"I don't have the will. I promise you, I will give up again. I see so much death and destruction and evil, I can't handle it. Some day, I'm going to give up, and you won't be able to convince me to save you. Not even your corpse will persuade me."

"Then I'll go with you."

Silence.

The enormity of the offer hung in the air for a couple of seconds, while both men thought about it.

"But you're so happy here," Cas pointed out, obviously torn.

"For justice man, for good. And why should you have to do this on your own?"

"Because I've done bad things. You don't want to spend eternity with me," Castiel said darkly.

"I do," he replied firmly. And he really did. Although this might've been a split second decision to save humanity, the more he thought about it, the more he realised how okay this plan was. His other self had already come to the conclusion that he was in love with Castiel and now this version was slowly coming to terms with it too. Of course he wanted to spend the rest of eternity with his angel-superhero.

Cas sighed, distressed at how adamant Dean was, but also, a tiny part of his brain was exuberant. Could this be a solution? Reluctantly Cas said okay.

Dean nodded in small triumph, and then shuffled his feet around, as they stood kind of awkwardly in the dark street. Cas just stared at him, as he shoved his hands in his pocket.

"So... what now?" Dean finally asked.

"We just need to wait for a few days or weeks for the next evil to show up. I'm sure it will be soon."

"Okay then. Come home with me?" he half offered, half requested.

"Not tonight, Dean."

"But... I thought you'd spent enough time alone?" he asked unsurely.

"I just need this one last night to myself," he said, face covered in shadows.

"Okay, I guess I'll see you soon then. Um, bye," Dean walked away, awkwardly smiling at him, leaving Cas alone, to his poisonous thoughts.

He didn't deserve this. He was stealing a perfectly content human being from his life, and shoving him into a dark, twisted tunnel, doomed to fall forever with him. He was being completely selfish. He didn't deserve favours, he didn't deserve Dean to be nice to him, he didn't deserve his love. He'd done terrible, terrible things.

Year: 2008

Cas materialised in the house he shared with Bobby and Ellen. He was eighteen years old and covered in blood, which he'd completely forgotten as he greeted Ellen and went to hug her. She stood back horrified.

"Why the hell are you covered in blood, young man?"

Cas looked down at his clothes guiltily. He hadn't told his family about his missions to save humanity. Only Dean knew about that. He wasn't sure how they'd take it, and he didn't want them to worry about him. So for all this time he'd been materialising in his bathroom, and removing all evidence of the people he'd just killed in the shower. He'd forgotten where he was materialising in the heat of the moment and ended up in the dining room, where Ellen was just setting up for dinner.

But now, he thought it was about time to confess that he'd been going back in time and stopping evil doers. Like Dean had said, when he'd started all of this, how could his parent's be disappointed in him for being a hero and saving millions? And also, there was no way he could think of a viable excuse for all this blood.

He got Bobby, and asked his parents to sit down while he told them all about his secret double life of justice. They were horrified.

"Castiel Singer, you are barely an adult! How dare you go behind our backs and do this. You think it's a good idea? No, it's a terrible idea!" Ellen said, concern cracking her voice.

"You ever think of the consequences, boy? We need our history and our wars, so we can learn from our mistakes! You have to stop what you're doing now. We raised you to have as normal a life as possible. Where did we go wrong?" Bobby asked.

"I'm serving justice! You're both wrong! I save millions of people, I'm unstoppable!" Castiel announced a dangerous glint in his eye. He was still high on adrenaline from his recent fight with the Prince of Wallachia, or more commonly known, Vlad the Impaler."It's a good thing that I do this. I can kill any evil doer ever. Like, if anyone hurt you, I'd kill them before they did it."

"That's not a good thing. Killing people is wrong, you're stooping to their levels," Bobby yelled.

"There's no other way! I love you, and no one will hurt you. I'm immune to justice, because I am justice. It's okay for me to kill people, because I'm killing guilty people."

"Who gave you the right?" Ellen asked, tears forming in her eyes. Castiel was scaring her. He'd taken the morals and justice he'd been raised with since he was a baby, and twisted them beyond recognition. If only they'd known, before he'd got in the mindset that he was invincible, they could've helped

"This is my purpose," Castiel explained. "If God won't stop genocides, I will. I'll be your new God. A better one."

Ellen and Bobby widened their eyes. This was getting really out of hand.

"What happened to my little boy," Ellen asked nobody in particular, looking down at her lap sadly.

"Your little boy grew up when he watched Ivan IV of Russia torture 300 people for enjoyment," Cas spat, tired of this argument. He didn't need their validation anymore. After the evils he'd seen, he knew he was doing right.

Later that night, Cas was standing outside his parent's bedroom door, eavesdropping.

"We need to do something about it. We can't just let him carry on," Ellen said.

"But what can we do? He said so himself, he's unstoppable!" Bobby countered, exasperatedly.

"We have to tell someone about his powers."

"They'll take him away for sure."

"You heard him down there! He's crazy, he's more than we can handle. I love the boy, but he needs serious help," Ellen said, her voice sounding sharp and erratic like she was crying.

Bobby sighed deeply. "I love him too. I love him like my own son."

Abruptly, Castiel found himself bursting into the room, wings spread threateningly.

"Like your own son!? Are you not my real parents?"

"Castiel," Ellen cried.

"Answer the question! Are you or are you not my real parents."

Slowly, Bobby shook his head. "You...you were abandoned by your real mom when you were about a week old. We found you on our doorstep one morning and... well here we are today," Bobby said quietly.

"You lied to me," Castiel replied equally quietly, but dangerously so. Ellen took a few steps towards him before Castiel shouted suddenly.

"I loved you, and you've been lying to me this whole time?" he boomed, eyes glowing furiously. Bobby and Ellen staggered back.

"We love you too, we love you with all our hearts Castiel!" Ellen said, trying to calm him down. She knew it was not safe having such a powerful man in such a betrayed and furious state, and she tried to diffuse the tension.

"No, you can't love me. I am not yours. I am an abomination, I don't belong! Who is my real mother? What is my purpose if it isn't to save people?" his voice caught a desperate edge.

"You have to calm down, son. You're crazy at the moment, but we can get you help," Bobby reassured.

"No, you're untrustworthy, you want to hurt me. You were going to get me off your hands like I'm a misbehaving dog," he spat accusingly.

And then, it all happened so fast.

Ellen, not able to bear seeing her son so distraught, took a few steps closer to try and hug him. Admittedly, this was a stupid mistake, but everyone was crazy with grief that night.

Castiel, thinking she was a threat, knocked her away with his powerful wing.

Her head hit the bedside table with a dull thud, but not before Bobby launched himself at Cas, belatedly trying to stop his wife from getting hurt.

Again the strong wing launched a victim across the room. Thud.

The pools of blood mixed in the carpet.

Cas waited for them to get up and start yelling at him.

They didn't.

Slowly, he approached them, not accepting the fact that they could be dead. These were his parents. Okay, maybe not his real parents, but they'd raised him since he could remember. These thoughts hurt, as he felt for a pulse dillusionally on Ellen's neck.

But they couldn't be dead, they'd always been there for him.

No.

Suddenly Cas staggered back, as if he was seeing the scene for the first time. Who did this to them he thought furiously. It took him a few seconds to realise it was his own wing that had delivered the killing blow. He hadn't meant to, but it had happened. It was an accident. Tears started rolling down his face, hot and heavy.

There must be another way.

He would go back in time, stop himself. He'd take any means to stop himself. He would kill him, for killing his parents. They can't die. They were good people.

He calmly tried to go back to stop himself. He was unable to. There was a mental barrier, blocking his way. He tried, again and again and again.

They were still dead on the floor.

He had killed them.

Year: 2021

Cas wished he could kill himself. Then he couldn't've fucked up human history so bad. He was not worthy of Dean's company, and did not deserve to have him with him on his eternal mission to save humanity, and redeem himself. It was a punishment for Castiel and no one else. It was weak and selfish and stupid for him to come to Dean in the first place. He was about to leave, and try to never come back, so Dean could live through his own normal life, and Cas could live through his own hell, when he saw the man jogging back to him down the street. Cas frowned at him in question.

"I realised it's a really stupid idea to leave a depressed suicidal superman with the fate of the human race in his hands alone," he explained, catching his breath.

Cas was about to complain, when he realised there was actual sense in his words. If he left now, he'd surely give up sooner or later. But he had to get something off his chest first. "I killed Ellen and Bobby."

Dean's eyes widened in horror. "You what?"

Cas recounted the events of the night that he couldn't take back, about how he killed the only family he ever had, for the silliest reason.

"Cas," Dean began, a little lost for words. "I'm so, so sorry."

"Why are you sorry. I'm the one that killed them, you should be angry" Cas said coldly.

"But it was an accident. You said yourself! You can't blame yourself for this, you were bat shit on emotions, you thought she was a threat, and you thought you could rewind time. You'd never had to deal with consequences until then. It's terrible but dude, to be honest, I think you've learnt your lesson. I mean, yeah you're a little bit guilty for accidental man slaughter maybe, but I'm sure you've spent more than enough time in that prison in your head. You've repented enough, and you obviously regret it. You've got to stop blaming and hating yourself for it."

Cas looked at him doubtfully.

"Come back to my house. That's an order."

Once back in Dean's small apartment, they sat on his ratty couch, and just talked. Dean told Cas about his life. It was kind of boring really, he worked as a mechanic, and went out to the bar every weekend. He visited his mom and dad every so often, and would phone Sam most days, who was studying law at Harvard, the smart son of a bitch. While talking, Dean's hands crept to the edge of Cas' wing. The familiar feelings seemed to put both of them at ease.

"So how does this timey wimey crap work?" Dean asked after a few minutes of comfortable silence. "Like, I get you killed the most evil people in history, but how come new evil people are popping up every week or so now?"

"Without a history of such violence and misery, the human race is so much more naïve. A lot of people can't even begin to comprehend the evil behind the people I kill, so of course it's easier for the ones that can to act on their thoughts. It also makes the psychopath think he's the first one to come up with such an evil plot, and they want to be famous for it. It's very messed up. I regret starting this, despite all the people I've saved."

"Yeah, well it's hard man. You have to decide who's worth saving. But I think you've done the right thing. You've ended so much suffering. I just wish there were more time travelling super angels, so you didn't have to carry the weight of the world all by yourself." Cas nodded in agreement.

"And how come you keep coming back to the present? Or I don't know if it's the proper present, but like how do you decide to come back to this time, like not the future... ah shit, you know what I mean?" Dean asked, fumbling over the confusing concept of time travel.

"I'm just waiting for the next apocalypse. I used to try to fast forward these few days, to get straight to the bad guy, but it got confusing, and sometimes I'd be too late and they would've destroyed the whole world, including themselves, and I wouldn't be able to find the monster that started it. So in the end, I decided it was more efficient to wait it out in real time. I can see the early warning signs, and it just makes the whole job easier," Cas explained.

"Huh," Dean replied simply.

Even after all these years, he didn't completely understand time travel himself. He didn't know whether there was only one present, or if all time was present, relative. If it was, he couldn't help but feel guilty for the futureans suffering at the moment because of the next inevitable apocalypse, but how could he help them now? He also would find himself wondering if all of this changing history created alternative universes. It made sense, and if so, it means billions upon billions upon billions were suffering because of Castiel, and he'd caused far more damage that he stopped.

Dean looked over and noticed Cas recessing into himself. He saw his crystal eyes cloud over, and a deep line crease between his eyebrows as his shoulders and wings tensed. Dean scooted closer and experimentally put one arm around Cas' shoulder, his fingers dangling down to rest against feathers. Immediately the man relaxed and leaned into the warm touch, and Dean started gently stroking his hair with his other hand. Cas sighed wearily, and seemed to stop thinking too hard for the moment.

Soon, they fell asleep on the sofa, Dean's arm hugged protectively round the other man, and Cas' wings covering them both. For once, Cas thought things might turn out okay, with Dean by his side.

Year: 2029

Lucifer was a religious nut who hated every human ever to exist. With his charm and persuasion, he developed a very massive following. They efficiently killed tens of thousands of people in the span of just one week. Dean was well adjusted to the life with Cas by now, and they'd developed a routine. Clasping onto Cas, they travelled back in time, to before Lucifer had got his claws into people's brains. He was sat alone at a desk. Dean cleared his throat, getting the man's attention. Lucifer grabbed a knife out of his drawer as he turned around to face Dean. Obviously he was well accustomed to assassination attempts, even now. Or maybe he was just plain paranoid. Cas rolled his eyes as Dean started fighting with Lucifer, finally stabbing the soon to be mass murderer in the chest and twisting the knife. He didn't understand why Dean always had to fight them, when they could easily just kill them in their sleep. Dean had argued that it was a cowardly way to kill someone, and also it gave him a sense of justice to kill the evil son of a bitch in a bout of blood.

He turned away from the fresh corpse, wiping his hands on his jeans and grimacing.

"Humans are disgusting," Cas stated, thinking of all the evil Lucifer had done.

"Humans are fucking crazy. Let's go visit Sam."

After travelling back to their original time period and getting cleaned up, they drove to the house Sam shared with his long-term girlfriend Jess, Cas' wings awkwardly brushing the roof of Dean's impala. In the alternate timeline, Sam had been brainwashed by Lucifer and was one of his right hand men. It had hurt a lot for Dean to see Sam do such evil, even if he had been brainwashed.

The door burst open, revealing his too tall little brother, with a pretty, smiling blonde girl behind him. They looked much better compared to their apocalyptic other-selves had done, covered in blood with a glint in their eyes.

Sam hugged his brother hello, and shook Cas' hand, Jess giving them both a kiss on the cheek, before inviting them in for dinner. The food was delicious and the company was great. While Jess was out the room, Dean leaned in closer to Sam to tell him of their latest kill, and the peril they just saved the world from. Sam looked horrified and amazed at the appropriate parts, and would thank them both for saving everyone's asses continually.

At the end of the evening, they bid their farewell's, promising to visit again soon, and drove home to Dean's apartment.

"Sam and Jess look well," Cas smiled softly, looking over at Dean once he'd parked his Impala.
"Yeah, they did. You'll never guess what Sam told me while you guys were in the kitchen," Dean said, hardly able to keep in his excitement.

"What?"

"He's gunna pop the question soon!" Dean beamed. He'd said many times that Jess was the perfect girl for his little brother, and was obviously overjoyed for them. This was the kind of thing they saved the world for. When Cas had been on his own, and not visiting Dean, he never really saw much of the human race. He would just sit and wait it out in a grotty motel room for the next apocalypse to happen. But now, Dean had shared his family with him, and he could revel in the simple joys of life. Dean had given him a completely new perspective.

"That's great," Cas smiled again. He didn't remember smiling this much before he was with Dean like this.

On that note, Dean leaned in to kiss him. He only meant for it to be soft, just the movement of lips against each other, but Cas had other ideas, as he twisted his hands into Dean's too short hair and tried to straddle him in the small drivers seat of the impala, wings fluttering wildly. Another thing that had changed since Dean had joined Cas was his perspective on sex. That first time had been full of upset and desperation. It was not like that at all any more.

Dean laughed at Cas' eagerness and leaned back, letting Cas caress his face and kiss every part of skin showing.

When Cas swore after hitting his knee on the clutch stick, Dean suggested they should take this somewhere more private. Reluctantly, Cas agreed.

Not being able to wait very long without touching Dean, Cas pinned Dean's arms to the wall, and pressed his body flush against his, as soon as Dean shut the door. Dean let out a sharp breath as Cas grinded his hips once against his crotch. Cas leaned in and started kissing and nipping and sucking all over his face and neck again. Dean moaned, wanting more, trying to grind against Cas again, needing the friction, but Cas' hips had Dean trapped. He whined into Cas' mouth, knowing how much Cas loved to hear all the desperate little noises Dean made.

With that, Cas promptly unpinned him from the wall and dragged him to the bedroom, stripping off as they went, as if he couldn't wait a second longer, although it took Cas a while longer than Dean, as he had to drag the clothes over his massive wings to get them off.

By the time they clambered onto the double bed, they were both in their boxers. These items of clothing were quickly abandoned, as Cas straddled Dean again, the bare skin on skin sending a spark through his system. A pair of black wings encompassed the two men, giving them a kind of make shift tent. He looked down at Dean in the low light, gently stroking his face for a second, appreciating how lucky he was to be there with him. He still wasn't sure he deserved this, but by now he'd learnt to ignore the self-hatred gnawing away at his insides, in favour of enjoying Dean's company. And Dean's body. With that thought, he trailed his hands down Dean's torso, down past his navel, to his thigh. Dean swallowed heavily, and reached over to get a packet of lube from under the pillow.

Taking the packet from Dean's hand, Cas coated his fingers with the cool substance, while kissing down Dean's body. He got to his nipple, and licked and sucked at it until Dean was panting. While doing this, Cas' hand stroked the sensitive skin behind Dean's balls, causing Dean to arch off the bed.

"Cas," Dean whispered, dragging him into a sloppy kiss, one hand cupping his cheek, and hand fumbling downwards. Cas leant back and gave a 'not now' gesture, and then gently began to press at Dean's opening with his lube covered finger. Slowly, he worked in one, two, three fingers, leaving Dean gasping and panting for more. He let out a strangled moan when his fingers expertly brushed against his prostate. Cas continued touching the same sensitive spot, over and over again, till Dean couldn't bear it.

"Fuck me Cas, fuck," he growled between moans. Cas complied, his wings twitching too much to keep the make shift tent around them anymore.

He prepared himself, making sure to use generous amounts of lube, and then hooked Dean's legs up round his shoulders for a better angle. He lined himself up with Dean's ass, then began slowly inching forward until he was fully in, then he stopped. Dean let out the breath he'd been holding and whined, wanting Cas to start moving. He felt full to the brim, and he really needed Cas to do something soon or he was going to explode.

Finally, smirking evilly, Cas started moving, in and out at a steady pace. The angle was just right, and he was hitting Dean's prostate on almost every other thrust.

"So. Fucking. Tight," Cas purred appreciatively, punctuating each word with a downwards thrust.

All Dean could do was moan in response, unable to form a proper sentence. However he did manage to plunge his hands into Cas' soft feathers, provoking a gasp from him. Dean used this to try get Cas to thrust even deeper into him.

With Cas' sex voice and steady rhythm, it didn't take long till Dean's hand flew to his dick to stroke a few times before coming all over his hand and stomach. The clench of the muscles, and the sound of Dean's orgasm also sent Cas over the edge, come spilling into Dean's ass a few seconds later, and wings twitching uncontrollably in pleasure.

Cas pulled out with a wet sound, and went to lay next to Dean, both of them blissed out by their orgasms.

"Fuck, Cas," Dean finally slurred, turning to smile at him.

"Fuck," Cas agreed, scooping Dean into another kiss.

Year: 2029

Zachariah just had one of those faces that were asking to be punched. Luckily, Dean got to do that, and more, because the son of the bitch had blown up twenty buildings, killing thousands. Materialising into a younger Zachariah's kitchen, Dean fought him, rejoicing in every punch to his smug face. Finally, to put the evil son of a bitch to sleep, Dean stabbed him through the neck.

"Humans are disgusting," Cas said, remembering all the families that had died in the explosions.

"Humans are fucking crazy. Let's go visit Sam."

Sam opened the door beaming, with two fuzzy moose antlers on his head.

Dean and Cas squinted confusedly at the felt head decorations.

"They ran out of reindeer antlers. Shut up. Merry Christmas!" Sam said exuberantly.

"Merry Christmas Sammy," Dean smiled back at his goofy brother, "is mom here yet?"

Sam nodded, letting the two of them in. Mary greeted Dean with massive hugs and kisses, as if she hadn't only seen him a few weeks ago when the two of them had dropped by after an apocalypse. Then she gave Cas the same treatment. Although she looked kind of frail in her old age, grey hair running through the blonde, she gave really strong hugs.

Over an amazing and very filling lunch, they swapped silly stories and jokes, pulling crackers and wearing stupid hats. For once, Dean and Cas didn't mention anything about who they'd just killed to Sam; they chose to completely forget about all that, and submerge themselves in the normal life for once. Taking their glasses of wine into the living room, they continued their story telling. They talked about Sam and Jess' wonderful wedding, a month gone now, and teased Dean and Cas about when they're going to get married. Dean rolled his eyes at them, Cas chuckling at Dean's faint blush. Then they got nostalgic, talking about their childhood Christmases. After the conversation got too sombre (John had just died last year from a heart attack), Sam yelled that it was time for presents. By evening, the family were all snuggled up on the sofa or around the sofa, watching Elf.

"Oh, look at the time, I should be getting home now," Mary said once the movie had ended.

"Okay, I'll drive you," Sam offered, standing up and stretching.

"And I think me and Cas'll leave now too," Dean added, helping Cas up from the floor.

The group shuffled towards the door, hugging and bidding farewells, and thanking each other for the presents. However once outside, Dean and Cas were alone, as the others were all still stood inside and now chuckling at them. Jess pointed to the mistletoe above their heads.

Dean rolled his eyes, then winked at Cas before leaning in and kissing him. The three family members aw-ed. But when Dean started properly making out with Cas, Sam kicked him.

"Ok, gross, get out of our house," Sam laughed.

Sam kissed Jess good bye, and then they each left to their respective rides.

Cas and Dean sat in the car.

"This has been nice," Cas commented. He hadn't celebrated Christmas for so many years, and it had been heart warming.

"And we're not done yet. Let's hit the bar, Benny just texted me, said wants to hang out," Dean smiled.

"'N' that was how we killed Zacharius... Zachariah... Zucchini," Dean slurred, putting down his sixth beer.

"That is the best story you've ever come up with brother," Benny guffawed, slapping Dean on the back.

"It's true, that bitch Zimbabwe... Zach no it was Zach," Cas added.

"Yeah yeah, whatever you say."

Just then, a guy from across the room cawed loudly, and then guffawed when Cas turned round to see what was going on.

"Hey Hawk Eye, how's it going?" the very drunk guy shouted.

"He's not Hawk Eye, he's super man!" Dean yelled back, probably equally drunk, leaping up from the table and running at the group. Benny and Cas got up, and followed suit. They were outnumbered, but were much better at fighting. They'd never know who would win though, as they all got chucked out a minute later, and sent opposite ways. Not wanting to get arrested on Christmas night, they left it at that. Benny bid the two of them a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year, then they all walked to their own homes, too drunk to call a cab.

Once home, Cas and Dean fell onto the couch and shared some sloppy kisses, not really able to do much more.

"Y'know I love ya Cas," Dean said, finally resting his head on Cas' shoulder, one hand plunging into Cas' feathers.

"'N' I, you Dean. You get so soppy when you're drunk," Cas giggled, kissing the top of his head.

"Shu'p angel," Dean retorted.

"Thank you."

"F'what?" Dean asked sleepily.

"Giving me a great life, worth living. Giving me a normal life as much as you can. For giving me everything," Cas whispered, listening to Dean begin to gently snore.

Year: 2008 (two months before he kills Bobby and Ellen)

A seventeen year old Cas knocked on the door.

"Castiel, how nice to see you. Dean's up in his room I think," Mary welcomed the familiar face warmly.

Thanking her, Cas ran eagerly up the stairs and burst into Dean's room without knocking. All he saw was a blur of flushed skin and then heard a thump as Dean fell off the side of his bed.

"Fucking knock first man, I was busy!" Dean yelled, muffled by the bedding that had followed his fall.

"My apologies. Are you okay?" Cas replied in a gravelly voice. His voice had broken some when during the year before, and it had surprised everyone when the almost-too-deep-to-be-real voice rumbled out of the young boy.

Dean's violently blushing face appeared above the side of the bed.

"Yes, I'm okay," Dean said huffily. "Urm... I kinda need to clear up urm... can you fuck off for a moment?"

Cas nodded politely and left the room.

Once it was safe to come back in, they both went to sit on the floor.

"So what are you so excited about that you couldn't even knock?" Dean asked, laughing awkwardly.

"I just killed Joseph Stalin."

"Shit man, that's great! Urm, who's Stalin, what did he do?"

Cas rolled his eyes. Cas remembered studying Stalin for a whole term last year with Dean for school, but he also had a simultaneous memory of studying poverty in Europe in the 1900's. It was weird how time travel would affect his memory. He'd have lots of simultaneous memory's, so he could remember all the monsters he'd killed, and what the world was like before he stopped them, but he also remembered the new timeline where they'd never caused all that damage. The new timeline memory, the one that matched Dean's, was always the brightest, so it was easy enough to tell the difference and not get confused.

"He was the most murderous dictator in history. Not that that's difficult, because I killed the most evil ones. He was the dictator of the Soviet Union in 1920's and he was a monster. He made it so that under his rulings, millions of people starved to death, and then in the thirties, he purged the party of 'enemies of the people', resulting in the execution of thousands and the exile of millions to slave labour camps. It was terrible."

"Oh god, well thanks for killing him dude, you did good. I swear you've killed almost every bad guy in history now?"

"Not yet. Nearly though. I have a few more people on my list, including Vlad the Impaler for instance, and then I should be done."

"What are you gunna do after that?"

"Live as normal a life as possible I guess, after all-" Cas was cut off by a crash and a scream heard from downstairs.

"Mom!?" Dean yelled, already sprinting downstairs, with his friend hot on his tail, wings fluttering frantically. He stopped abruptly when he saw Mary's broken body on the floor, Sam's smaller body lying next to her, and some people dressed in creepy black cloaks that hid their faces, efficiently setting fire to the house.

Dean growled as he ran at the closest hooded figure, too quick for Cas to stop him, which was annoying because they needn't fight the intruders. All Cas had to do was go back in time and stop the people from ever breaking into the house, but Dean seemed to have lost his common sense the moment he lost his family.

Dean got in a few good punches before another grabbed him from behind and stabbed him through the back. The teenager fell to the ground, blood spilling from his chest. Rage flooded over Cas as he watched the figures throw Dean's body on top of his brother's and leave the building. Cas flew down after them, deciding he needed some information before he went back in time to stop them.

He silently followed them out the door, then attacked, dropping three of them with the beat of his powerful wings alone. The remaining members saw the massive ebony wings and legged it, trampling over John Winchester's fresh corpse in the drive way. Cas let them go; he'd find them later. He turned in on one of the groaning body's on the floor and grabbed the collar. The black hood fell back, revealing a girl's face. She had short, bleached blonde hair, blood running down from it, and a small, pretty face. Cas shook her roughly.

"Who are you? Why have you done this?" Castiel spat at her. She laughed.

"How do you do, I'm Meg," she replied, after coughing up some blood. The first blow that knocked her down must've knocked out a tooth out or something. Castiel spread his wings threateningly, ready to deal another blow to force an answer out of her, before she laughed again.

"Ok, ok, calm it angel. I'll tell you what you want to know. This was a test. For the kid, Sam Winchester."

"Clarify," Castiel demanded.

"Well, I'm the seer of what I guess you could call a cult. We worship a demon called Azazel. Azazel told me that he picked around three hundred special children, for us to 'test'. This is how we get choose our new leader," Meg smiled sickly. "Sam here, as you can see, failed the test."

"So what you're saying is that you have or will slaughter three hundred families for your cult?"

Meg nodded.

"And you're the seer? You're responsible for it all?"

Another nod.

"I see."

Cas grabbed her head, and searched through her memories, and found out where she would be when she was seventeen years old, before she ever started this cult.

He went back and snapped her neck.

Back in the present, he materialised in Dean's room again, darkness glowing around him.

"Hey dude, what was all that about. You were here telling me about Stalin one minute, and the next you were gone?"

"Yes... I just stopped a crazy cult from killing your whole family," Cas said, not looking at Dean.

"What the fuck? Wait, so now the people you're killing are in the present? Did they actually kill my family? Oh fuck man, are they ok, are you ok?" Dean continued babbling anxiously, but Cas had stopped listening, as he was deep in thought.

The evil people would never stop. He'd have to be killing them for the rest of his life. He'll never be able to live normally. He had the fragile fate of the human race in his hands forever.

"It must've been so easy for Meg to kill all those people, the human race is too naïve to even comprehend Meg's evil, let alone try and stop it," he murmured, stopping Dean's rant.

"What?"

"I fucked up," Cas said, louder this time, and with that he left.

He still had work to do, and now he'd be saving his present from the monsters as well.

Year: 2055

Alastair was a crazed medical genius gone wrong. He'd created a plague that spread over America in just two days, killing millions. Dean and Cas travelled back in time, to before he started developing the bio-weapon of mass destruction. Cas watched as Dean battled it out with the monster, knocking Alastair's knife to the floor and slitting his throat.

"Humans are disgusting," Cas stated, thinking of all the corpses Alastair had been responsible for.

"Humans are fucking crazy. Let's go visit Sam."

They arrived at his front door, like they had so many times before. Jess opened the door, smiling and hugging the two of them in greeting.

"You're both looking very well," Jess commented, leading them into the living room, where Sam was sat on the sofa, "I could swear neither of you have aged a day since I first met you. What's your secret?" Jess smiled.

"Fountain of youth," Dean replied, smirking. "Sam, too lazy to even greet us at the door I see?"

Sam and Jess exchanged a nervous look at the comment. The older Winchester frowned.

"Um, Cas, would you join me in the kitchen? I think Sam needs to talk to Dean alone," Jess said, joking tone completely gone.

Cas sensed the suddenly tense atmosphere, and placed a supportive hand on Dean's shoulder, before going to the kitchen with the blonde woman, who he'd come to think of fondly as a little sister.

"What's wrong Sammy," Dean asked, worry twisting his tone once they were the only ones in the room.

Sam sighed heavily. "It's true you know," he said, earning himself a confused look from his brother. "You haven't aged a day. What's up with that?"

"It's a time travelling side effect I guess. Cas stopped aging when he was around 25, I stopped aging when I joined him, so around 30..."

"I guess that makes me the older brother then," Sam smiled sadly, looking at his hands.

"No way. I am a proud 52 year old. No wait, 53... ah I can't remember, it's all weird with time travel."

Sam chuckled at Dean's forgetfulness, marvelling at how far fetched his whole life was, compared to Sam's. After a few moments silence, Sam finally just said it.

"I had a heart attack last month. I've been diagnosed with Ischemic heart disease. Just like dad."

Dean was silent for a minute or two, and then gazed up at his brother with fear plain in his eyes. "What does that mean to me?" he growled.

"Well, basically? I'm not expected to live much longer."

Dean nodded, a tear threatening to spill, but he held it in, and put on a strong front for his brother.

"I'm sure you're going to make it through, you eat enough salad," he leaned forward to hug his brother, only a little longer than their usual bro hug.

"Thanks, Dean."

They ate their dinner; as usual it was delicious, and while Jess was out the room, Dean and Cas would tell Sam about their adventures saving the world. But the atmosphere was much more subdued. Once they bid their farewells, Dean hugging them both longer than strictly necessary, Dean and Cas left to go home to their apartment. On the short car trip home, Dean explained what Sam had told him to Cas.

"I'm sorry, Dean. I wish there was something we could do," Cas consoled, taking and squeezing his hand supportively.

"I know. We can save the human race over and over again, defeat these evil crazy sons of bitches. But we can't save Sammy from this," Dean said distantly, as if he didn't actually understand what he was saying, and hadn't accepted it yet.

"I'm sorry," Cas repeated, and he meant it. He knew this was going to happen, when he first started travelling with Dean. He'd have to watch everyone he'd ever loved grow old and die. But Dean hadn't minded at the time. It was the natural order of things, everyone had to die eventually. But it was harder to say that when it was your brother dying of heart disease, at only 50 years of age, while Dean got away with possibly eternal youth. For the millionth time, Cas felt overwhelmingly guilty for ever taking Dean with him.

That night, neither of them were in the mood for sex.

A/N thank you for reading so far!