Two Steps Back

The two of them sat across each other in the dimly lit restaurant at a small booth next to the widows. After placing their orders a sudden silence fall upon them. Yakumo stared at the ice in her drink that was lazily drifting in her water as Harima daydreamed out the window seemingly ignoring each passerby. Neither seemed to be phased by the seemingly awkward silence, by how they both simply didn't acknowledge it. As there food arrived they both shifted their attention to their plates.

"It smells pretty good, huh?" Harima finally said grabbing hold of his spoon scooping up a portion of the rice followed by some of the curry. Yakumo didn't respond and took a small bite of her food. Her thoughts were still on his drawing of her and wanted to ask him about it but just couldn't think of how to phrase her question. Several minutes into their meal Harima finally realized that both of them were being abnormally quiet. His determination to make conversation then consumed him.

"So what do you think of this place?" He asked putting his spoon down as he sat up in his seat. He looked around at the burgundy walls that were contrasted the dull brass colored outlining of the booths and chairs.

"Its nice." She said in her typical meek, yet monotone voice. He began to analyze her and his eyes followed her every movement and the minor changes in her usual pattern. It was then he noticed that there was something on her mind but didn't want to make assumptions on what it could possibly be, finally learning from the many mistakes that he had made in recent past. The silence quickly returned as they both resumed their meals.

"Hey," he said still resilient on removing the silence. "I know this is sudden but do you have any plans on what you want to do after high school?"

Yakumo was momentarily surprised by the seriousness of his question. Some time passed as she thought about it. "Honestly, no I haven't." she finally made out. "We're supposed to turn in another 'Our Future Goals' questionnaire next week but I don't know what I'm going to put."

"Well, what did you put last time."

"Just a generic response. That I want to go to college."

"Is that what you want to do?"

"I don't know, really. That was the plan for a while but its not like I know what I want to study either." She said in complete hoesty with a hint of fear in her voice. "What did you put on yours, if you don't mind me asking?"

"That it was none of their business what I do or don't do." Harima quickly realizing how unnecessarily rude his answer was.

"Wouldn't you get in trouble?"

"The teacher would just give me a new one and tell me to turn it back in when I finally serious, but I never got around to it." He said with a slight frown of regret.

"Do you have any plans for the future?" her words were nervous and shaky, but her curiosity persisted.

"Not anymore. For a while I had this one plan and I put everything I had into but it all just sorta fell to pieces, you know?"

"Yeah…" Yakumo said after a brief pause with an idea of what he meant.

"Anyway, you wanna get out here?"

"Sure." She said reaching into her small purse for her wallet.

"Nah, I got this." Harima said placing some money on the table. Yakumo smiled seeing that the amount that he had placed on the table wasn't enough, but appreciated the gesture. As he got up she sneakily placed the rest of the money on table.

The two walked out continuing their conversation.

"But yeah, I'm just taking it day-by-day now and tomorrow I'm going to go to the publishing company. Hopefully they'll go easy on me for just stopping with no word."

"I can come with you, if you want." Yakumo suggested pulling her collar up to combat the rapidly dropping temperature.

"No, its fine. Don't you have that tea club thing anyway?"

"I do, but I'm sure Akira would understand."

"Don't worry about it." He insisted as they crossed the street.

As the two approached the front of the house they saw Sarah who was still just arriving. She quickly noticed the unlikely couple and quickly walked toward them.

"Oooooh, where are you two coming from?" she asked dying to know the details.

"We went to try that new curry place that just opened." He explained opening the front door ignoring the obvious implications in her tone.

"And how was that?"

"It was fine." Yakumo told her following Harima into the house.

"Yeah it was ok, but Yakumo's is better in my opinion." he said removing his shoes and immediately going to his room.

"Did you hear that Yakumo?" Sarah asked following her into the kitchen where Yakumo began to put on a pot of tea.

"I did," she responded quickly, "Oh, did you bring in the mail?"

"I did," Sarah said mimicking Yakumo's tone while handing it to her. She flipped through the collection of envelopes and found a letter from Tenma. She poured herself a cup of tea and moved to the table and opened it. She pulled out the letter and sat down. As she did Sarah stood behind her leaning forward to read it to.

Dear Yakumo,

How are you and Sarah doing? I hope you're still getting along without having to rely on your big sister. Anyway, Karasuma is doing better and sometimes his memories come back! But it isn't for very long. Sometimes he has really good days where he remembers everybody back home but other days he doesn't say a word. But I'm still hopeful! I really hope your doing good in school. Mikoto told me that they don't see you as much and I hope that's not on purpose. Oh yeah and Valentines Day is coming up soon do you and Sarah have special some ooooonnnneesssss? Be sure to let me know all the details! The doctors told me that if Karasuma is ok that I can take him out for Valentines Day, so I have my fingers crossed (you better too). I really, really hope he's good that day because I want to show him just how much I love him! Write back soon and tell me what's new 'kay?

Your Big Sis

"Well she seems to be the same old Tenma." Sarah said standing back up. Yakumo reached for the envelope and noticed that there was a picture of a smiling Tenma hugging Karasuma who has a vacant face. She turned the picture over and found some more writing: Isn't he just so handsome when he's being all stoic and mysterious!

Yakumo smile as she read it taking her last sip of tea. "I think I'm going to go to bed early tonight," she said taking he cup along with the envelope and its contents to the sink. She placed the letter and picture down on the counter to rinse the cup and turned back around to Sarah telling her good night and headed to the bathroom to brush her teeth. After she changed and got into bed. She laid there for a while listening to the strong winds whip against the house. "I'm glad you're doing well, sis. I miss you." She thought to herself as she slowly fell asleep.

A few hours later Harima decided to take a break from his manga and went to the kitchen for a late night snack. He moved silently to not wake anyone. He turned on the light and looked through the fridge. After several moments of looking through its contents he quickly gave up on eating. He went to the sink deciding that he'll just settle for some tea. As he reached for a glass but then a rough piece of paper caught his eye. He hesitantly picked it up. His eyes widened as he read the letter from Tenma. A wave of nostalgia and pain rushed over him.

I really, really hope he's good that day because I want to show him just how much I love him!

Those words pierced him as soon as he finished the sentence. Harima stood there with a pain that was tightly gripping his heart. He then saw the photo of the two of them and the sadness began to grow. He read the back and couldn't take any more. He put the letter and picture back to its original state and headed back to his room. With a blank mind Harima got into bed. Before he closed his eyes only one thought passed over him. "Why couldn't it have been me?"