Disclaimer: Sadly, I still don't own Harry Potter. =/

Chapter 85

"Albus, I should be the one providing a home for Harry, not the mutt."

"All you have to do is say the word Severus. You don't have to keep going back to Riddle."

"Then you'll lose any information I'm able to bring you."

"We will, but we'll get by. I hate that you're risking your life, especially now that you have someone else that needs you." Albus just happened to look up at that moment and he saw a flash of insight into Severus' gaze. It was brief, but it was there. He had thought for sure that Severus had conquered that fear. "You're afraid."

"Excuse me?"

"You're afraid to tell Harry the truth. You're afraid that you won't be able to be a good father."

Severus stiffened.

"You're afraid that he'll reject you now that he has his godfather free," Albus continued on relentlessly.

Severus still said nothing, but his posture indicated that the Headmaster had hit the nail on the head - so to speak.

"Severus, look at me." Albus waited until he looked up. "You do not give Harry enough credit. He understands a lot more than most his age and the compassion in him is greater than in any other I've ever met. You need to get over this fear of yours and just tell him the truth. I happen to think that you'll make an excellent father."

"And if I make a mistake?"

"You are human, Severus. Everyone makes mistakes. I'm sure you will make many as a father, and I'm sure that Harry will make just as many as your son, but it's the journey together that will be memorable. You need to tell him."

"He's almost an adult."

"Yet still a child in so many ways. He doesn't have to be a small child to have a father Severus. He could benefit from just being near you. Harry already trusts you. You heard that out of his own mouth."

"And if I destroy that trust when I tell him the truth?"

"Then you slowly rebuild it. Any other arguments I can shoot down? Because I will have a counter for every one of them."

Severus took a drink of his tea to keep from replying.

"Are you going to give Sirius the letter Lily wrote to him?"

Severus sneered. "No. Why should I?"

"Because Harry isn't going to like being made to choose when he learns the truth, and he shouldn't have to choose. Of course, that means that you and Sirius will have to actually sit down and have a conversation without hexing each other."

Severus gave the Headmaster a look that clearly said that was an impossible request.

The floo chose that moment to flare a brighter green, indicating a fire-call.

"Albus, I need you here. Harry's in some kind of trance and neither Remus nor I can break it."

Albus immediately stepped into the fireplace followed by Severus (having been told the address as soon as it was decided that Harry was staying there).

So worried about Harry, Sirius never even noticed as Severus stepped out of the fireplace.

They all entered the kitchen where Remus was trying to wake Harry.

"There's nothing you can do Remus. How long has he been like this?"

"Nearly fifteen minutes. What do you mean? You can't wake him?"

Harry's scar suddenly started bleeding as his arms and legs started twitching, as if he was having a minor seizure.

"Get a pail. The last time his scar bled, he got sick."

"C'mon Harry. Wake up," said Sirius as he knelt at Harry's side.

Snape pushed Black out of the way. "Fight it Potter. Fight it. You're not there."

Sirius had murder in his eyes then and most likely would have followed through with the implied threat had Harry not chose that moment to start coming around.

Harry's vision started clearing. He ached all over. His scar was throbbing something fierce, which probably meant it was bleeding.

Slowly he started hearing the voices around him.

Then he was nauseous. He turned his head and threw up and felt some what better almost immediately.

"Harry, answer me."

"I'm alright Sirius. I need ... I need to talk to Dumbledore."

"I'm here Harry."

Harry looked up and squinted. Then his vision cleared. Remus had put his new glasses (obtained the day before) on his face.

"Thanks Remus."

"What did you see Harry? What happened?"

"Voldemort's upset. Very upset. He believes that there are two traitors in his ranks because of something he told ... something he told to someone named Yaxley to do and the attempt was stopped."

Harry strained his memory.

"I don't remember the other person. He killed someone in anger and tortured another with the Cruciatus for a few minutes. Normally during the day I don't feel the curse that badly but he was seriously angry. Headmaster, you need to warn Professor Snape."

"What about?" asked Albus alarmed. If there was even a possibility that Severus' cover had been blown, the man would not be returning.

"Voldemort's going to do a loyalty test for each of his Death Eaters. Malfoy has been whispering in his ear, telling him that Snape can't be trusted. Malfoy said that he had never seen Snape cast the killing curse so his test might involve that."

"I'll let him know Harry. Don't worry about Professor Snape. That's my job."

"He probably doesn't let you do it very much," said Harry around the pain in his scar. Despite the argument that occurred before Harry left the castle, he didn't want the man hurt.

"No, not really. Now Harry, you said you can feel the Cruciatus curse even when you're awake?"

"Not that badly. It's worse when I'm asleep and get jerked into his mind. When I'm awake, I can fight against it, but he was very angry."

Albus frowned at what that could possibly mean for Harry. "You don't know what it was he wanted done?"

"No. I'm sorry."

"Harry, it's not your job to find out. Now, your scar has stopped bleeding. Go lie down for a while. Judging from the looks Sirius and Remus are giving me, I have some explaining to do."

When Harry stood up, he felt another presence in the house. Curiously he closed his eyes and tried reaching out with his magic like he had read being described in one of Madam Pomphrey's books.

His eyes flung open after about five seconds. "It worked. That's seriously cool."

Albus knew what he had done. He was actually surprised that Harry had not tried it before now. "Who is it?"

Harry smiled weakly. "Guess I told Professor Snape about the warning myself."

"Go rest, Harry."

Harry left the kitchen, nodding at Professor Snape, who was looking at him with an unreadable expression.

When Albus turned from the doorway, it was to see two curiously worried people.

Severus, he saw, had used the floo to leave after he watched Harry head up the stairs.

When Harry got up to his room, he smiled. Gabriella's owl was waiting on him.

"Hey Xander. Hang on and you can take back my reply. Help yourself to Hedwig's water. She won't mind."

"Rise my faithful. As you have no doubt noticed, Barty Crouch Jr. is no longer within my inner ranks. He was killed for his ineptitude and newfound cowardice. As a result, I have come to the conclusion that you all are going to have to prove yourself to me again.

"If you fail, you will die painfully. I must be clear where each of you stand."

Severus watched with an air of impassivity. Thanks to Potter's warning, he had mentally been preparing for this.

He watched as each inner circle member had their turn. Some were tortured anyway so the Dark Lord could enter their minds to see if any was indeed a traitor.

"Severus ... my dear Severus. You were one of my most faithful before I lost my body. You have done everything that I have ever asked you to do and you have done it well."

"I live to serve only you, my Lord."

"You didn't return to me right away after my rebirth and I was afraid that Dumbledore had won your allegiance but after hours of interrogation with Veritaserum, my fears were unfounded."

Beside of him, Severus felt Lucius stiffen.

"Oh yes, Lucius. Severus is still mine, not that fool of an old man's, but no one is above the test I have devised for them. Is it true Severus, that you have never cast the killing curse?"

"It is indeed true, my Lord."

"Why is this?"

"Others' have preferred to do so, so I obliged," Severus said indifferently.

The Dark Lord circled Snape. "I did bring you in for your potions' expertise above everything else."

Severus could feel the indignation coming from Lucius.

"Bring her in," snarled Voldemort. "I can't put you above everyone else in this. I know that you know how to torture. I have seen that with my own eyes. I've seen you torture someone to near death with potions and without. I've seen your potions kill. Now I need to make sure that you can. Use the killing curse. Kill the muggle."

When Voldemort stepped out of his way, Severus saw the woman he was to kill.

It took every ounce of his willpower not to react outwardly to the woman thrown at his feet. This was no doubt Lucius' doing.

The muggle woman looked up, begging to be let go, that she had kids who needed her. All Severus saw, however, were her bright green eyes and striking red hair.

"What's wrong Harry?" asked Remus as Harry walked into the kitchen for dinner a few days later.

"Nothing," he mumbled. The sight of the food made him feel sick.

"Harry?" asked Sirius as took some rice off of the stove.

Harry sighed. "Gabby sent me a letter breaking up with me."

"I'm sorry Harry," said Sirius as he put the food on the table. "I know how much you liked her."

"Her mom was worried about the danger she was in by being my girlfriend, especially since her father is a Death Eater and Voldemort is back. I tried breaking up with her before she left, to protect her and she told me no." Harry took a drink of his pumpkin juice. "It hurts more than I thought it would."

Sirius put his arm around Harry's shoulder and pulled him into a brief hug. "Sometimes the things that hurt the most are the best in the long run."

"I know. She's safer away from me. Everyone is," whispered Harry.

Sirius went on talking as if he didn't hear what Harry had said but judging from the look of disapproval coming from Remus, he did.

"Besides, you're too young to be in any serious relationship. You need to play the field some. See what's out there."

"I think I'm finished dating for a while. No need to put anyone else in any needless danger. I just hope that Voldemort leaves Gabriella alone."

"C'mon kiddo. Let's eat. Afterwards we can work on that Wizarding puzzle again."

"I'm not hungry. I think I'm going to go back to my room."

Sirius and Remus watched him walk back up the stairs.

July 20th, 1995

My homework is finally done. Side effect of not sleeping a lot. I've woken Sirius up nearly every night since I've came here. Meditation helps some. I've managed a good solid five hours each night, unless Voldemort is angry over something.

I've been reading those books that R. let me borrow, or rather I've been trying. It's written in Latin. I know enough now to not have to look up every word that I come across, but I do still have to look things up. It's hindering me.

Dumbledore is moving the order meetings here. He told Sirius that the castle can't be used anymore because the new minister was getting nosey. Naturally I won't be able to know anything, at least until I learn occlumency.

Sirius told me that I can invite Ron, Hermione, and Neville over for a small party on my birthday. I sent out invitations with Hedwig yesterday.

I hear Sirius waking up. Time to meditate some.

Harry

Harry always felt better after he practiced his calming exercises, which is what he was doing when Sirius knocked on his door.

"You awake?"

"Yeah. Finally finished my homework."

"Need me to look over it?"

"Nah. McGonagall assigned us a nasty Transfiguration essay and drawing. It was hard but I think I got it right."

"Transfiguration was my best subject in school so if you want me to look it over, I will."

"Really? I might have you do that later then."

Sirius smiled. "How are those occlumency books you're reading?"

Harry set the table for two for breakfast. "Hard to read. Why does everyone have to write in Latin?"

"Latin should be easy for a smart kid like you."

Harry made a face. "It's not. During my first year at Hogwarts I ordered a Latin dictionary when I started noticing that some of the spells were written with it."

Sirius frowned. "Didn't you do well in your muggle Latin class?"

Harry gave a humorless laugh. "I wasn't allowed to take it."

"What?" demanded Sirius. "It's an agreement our Minister has with the muggle prime minister. Latin is to be taught in their primary schools."

"The muggle prime minister knows about wizards and witches?" asked Harry surprised.

Sirius nodded.

Harry sighed. "Latin was taught at the school I went to but I wasn't allowed to take it."

"Why not?"

"Because of Dudley and my Aunt. If I done better than Dudley in anything, I got in trouble. Dudley was more horrible at Latin than his other classes, mostly because he was too busy bullying people to do his homework."

Sirius frowned. "How was your Aunt involved?"

"She told the school that I needed to be put in "special classes" because I was too dumb to take Latin. I guess she remembered mom needing it for her studies."

"Oh Harry. We need to get you caught up. I don't know how you've managed to survive 4 years without knowing Latin already."

"I can read some of it now with what I've taught myself."

"Have you tried a translation charm?"

"There are translation charms?"

Sirius chuckled. "There are. If you look in the library, you'll find a couple of books on them."

"That's awesome. Of course, it doesn't matter during the summer. I can't do magic."

"You can do minor things. With you living here, the ministry will just think it's me casting the spell."

"I'd rather not risk it. I've already gotten a warning for something I didn't do."

Sirius put breakfast on the table.

"Where's Remus?"

"He said that he'd be by tomorrow. He needed to make sure his friend is doing alright teaching the children."

"I can't believe they have school during the summer."

"Harry, Wizarding children only have lessons about two to three hours a day. By lunchtime, most of them are done."

Harry's eyes widened as big as saucers.

"That's one of the advantages muggle born children have when they go to Hogwarts over those raised in the Wizarding world. You all have the discipline to stay awake and focused more than the Wizarding children do because you are used to it from the muggle school system."

"No wonder Ron complained for two months that classes were torture. I thought he meant the classes themselves."

"No. He meant having them all day."

Harry ate his breakfast in silence, mulling over what he had just learned.

"I don't understand how he's functioning Remus," Sirius said as he downed his third cup of coffee that morning. "Ever since the summer has started, with the exception of two nights, he's had nightmares or those visions Albus described to us. He can't be getting more than four hours of sleep each night, and none of that can be very restful, nor good for him."

"Has he told you what his nightmares consist of?" asked Remus as he fixed himself a cup of tea.

"The past and the death's he's responsible for."

Remus looked up.

"I've told him that he's not responsible for anyone's death, but he doesn't believe me. However, he had a nightmare the other night where he screamed out against his uncle. I questioned him about it when he was awake and he changed the topic."

"I'd like to see the Dursley's hanged for what I suspect Harry's been through," said Remus quietly, "but we both know that Harry won't allow it."

Sirius scowled as he got up for his fourth cup of coffee. "If I knew I could get away with it, he wouldn't have a choice in the matter, but the last thing I want is for him to be angry at me."

"Where is he? I don't hear him upstairs."

"He was in the library last time I saw him. He found a book on secrecy charms and hasn't pulled his nose from it since then. Were you going out with us today?"

Remus shook his head. "I'm still tired from the full moon. Who are you using for the polyjuice?"

"A random muggle teenager. Tonks is coming along with us for extra protection as well. Even though we'll be out on the muggle side, you never can be too careful."

Remus nodded. "You two have fun. You both deserve it."

Sirius just grinned as he headed back to the coffee pot for his 5th cup, which made Remus just shake his head at the man.

A/N: I wanna thank everyone for the reviews - including those w/ the constructive criticism in them. I try to learn from every review I get. Hopefully it'll show as the story goes along that I am trying to improve my writing. =)

As for this past chapter - it's not as long as I thought it was going to be, but it seemed like a good place to stop. I hope Harry's little history lesson was liked. I toyed around with it for a bit. I know it's not much, but between getting chased by a meglomanic bent on world domination, and every thing else in his life, I just imagined that it was something that he would have never really taken the time to learn. It's not exactly like that type of conversation would come up casually between him and Ron. Him and Hermione I could maybe see ... but not Ron.

Harry's vision's probably seem worse while he's at Grimmauld Place - and there is a reason for that. However, this won't be noticed by anyone until later on (like much much later). I wrote them that way for a reason. There is also a reason he can feel the cruciatus curse when Lordy Moldy Pants casts it too. That also will not be explained until later on. (I imagine most of you will figure it out long before then .. but shhhh *hunts for the duct tape*.)

And no, that's not the last we'll be seeing/hearing of Gabriella. Though, I do have to say she was a lot better liked that I figured she would have been. (I know most people don't like original character's - especially when paired w/ the main character for 6 months.) I realize it was a rather boring way to be dumped, but it had to be done. It was one thing for them to date when He-Who-Has-A-Huge-Hyphenated-Name-And-Cannot-Die was not around ... it's something quite different for them to date now that's he's back, especially with her dad being a favored Death Eater. You never know ... maybe once school's back in session, they'll get back together. ;-) *grins mischievously*

And poor Severus. So. What do you think? Did he kill the muggle woman? Did he choose to save her and blow his cover? Did he manage to find some other way around it?

And yes, Voldemort is paranoid. Wouldn't you be if you were a spirit for 13 years when some of your most faithful servants had never even attempted to search for you? He needs to ferret out the traitor's early as he adds to his ranks before he can begin to wreck total havoc. *polishes the devil horns*

Up next, Harry's birthday, plus some of how Harry was treated as he grew up comes out. I might include more than his birthday. I'm not sure yet. I need to plunder through the chapter a couple of times and see how it flows. I'm going to aim for a Monday/Tuesday posting. It will most likely be out on Tuesday. I have a bunch of errands to do on Monday.