Disclaimer: The characters in this story belong to ABC Disney, Shonda Rhimes and the TV show Scandal. All credit to them.
A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and suggestions! Hope I got this right! Enjoy..
"Tell me the truth about what?"
Fitz gulps hard and his throat goes dry when he sees Olivia standing behind the refrigerator door with her arms crossed.
"Ummm..." He chokes out.
"That's my cue to leave." Jake says getting up and leaving the kitchen.
"Liv, can we go upstairs? I promise to tell you everything, just not here."
"Uhh, sure." She says side eyeing him. She had a bad feeling in her stomach the whole walk up there.
He leads her to the bed and sits next to her, keeping her hands in his and kisses the tops of them.
"Fitz.."
He knows he needs to quickly come out and say it but it's was easier thought than done. The way she looked so nervous made him want to tell her a lie, tell her it wasn't something bad like she thought but he knew eventually it was going to come out and it would hurt her more if it didn't come from him.
"Livvie, do you remember the first time I saw you in the gym with your dad?" He starts off slowly.
"Yeah...So."
"I was kind of pissed off at your dad and came up with a plan to get him back for being a jerk.." He pauses suddenly losing his nerve.
"What was the plan Fitz?" She says nervously almost afraid to ask.
"The plan..." He clears his throat. "The plan..was to get you to date me to piss him off then do something to embarrass you both." He says quickly then looks away.
He looks up at her and can see every emotion as it goes through her mind on her face. The first was shock, quickly going to anger then moving to the one he dreaded the most. Hurt. She removes her hands from his and when he reaches for them she pulls them back.
"Liv.." He says as he moves closer to her.
"No.." She says almost falling off the bed try to get away from him.
She stands and walks over to her bag pulling out her warm ups and starts getting dressed. She doesn't try to stop the tears, theres no point. After putting her pants on she can't get the zipper open on the jacket. The tears were blinding her and no matter many times she wiped them away they kept falling. He comes over there to try and help her but she yanks it away from him and continued to struggle.
"Let me help you Livvie." He pleads standing in front of her. "Don't call me that." She responded coldly.
He takes the jacket out of her grasp and unjams the zipper then hands it to her. She pulls it on and sits down to dig her shoes out of her bag.
"So you are really going to leave and not say anything about what I just told you?" He says kneeling next to her.
"What is there to say Fitz? I don't mean anything to you! I'm just the butt of some joke between you and your friends!" She says between sobs.
"You know that's not true. I'm sorry I made you feel that wabag I was a insensitive idiot, You have to know that."
"I don't know that. I don't know anything, I don't even know you." She pulls on her shoes. "It all makes since now. The way you just stood there on Monday and let Harrison disrespect me.." She stops when her voice starts break. ".. you didn't even say anything."
"And I was wrong, I can admit that. Liv, wait.." He stands when she does and grabs her wrists.
"Don't touch me."
"Ok, ok." He says letting her go and placing his hands on the wall on each side of her head keeping her there. "Can we just..can I have one minute. You and me stand here for one minute, I'm not the jerk that you hate, I'm just me and you're just you."
"Fitz I-"
"Please..Just one minute." He begs.
She drops her bag and leans back against the wall and looks up at him. "One minute.."
He let's out a breath. "Okay."
They lock eyes and she tries to pull herself together but the tears wouldn't stop. He moves his thumbs to her cheeks and wipes them as they fall. She was so beautiful and it made physically sick to see her this way. The hurt, disappointment and hint of regret in her eyes becomes too much for him and he can't stop his own tears from falling. He falls to his knees and wraps his arms around her waist and cries.
"Don't.." She moves down on her knees in front of him and puts her hands around the back of his neck. "Babe..please stop." She didn't know how else to react she may be hurting but seeing him this upset made her hurt even more.
"I can't lose you." He says looking into her eyes placing a hand on the side of her face. "You have become a part of me.." He runs his hands down her body trying to remember everything about her, every inch, every crevice and never let it go from his mind. "I want you..now that I know you, I can't be without you."
He pulls her into a kiss it's slow and apologetic. He keeps her lips close to his, "Say you'll be back Livvie..that you won't give up on us, not yet."
"I-I can't..I-"
"You're all I have..all I want." He says as he pulls her into a hug.
She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath inhaling his scent, still fresh from his shower earlier. He was all she had too but could she trust him? She wasn't sure that she could. Her mind was saying run but her heart was saying stay.
"Can you give it a day?" He pulls back grabbing her hands and looking at her. "Think about this..us. If when I see you tomorrow you say we aren't worth a try then I'll leave you alone. I promise."
She quietly gets up, grabs her bag, phone, keys and walks out the door leaving him alone, without a second glance. She needed more time, needed someone else's opinion because she wasn't ready to make that decision on the spot and she deserves that.
Maybe this is how my life is supposed to be he thinks to himself. Why wouldn't she be like everyone else? No one else gives a shit about me, why would she? What's the point on it all? He asks himself. There was no point he decided, not anymore. He gets up and changes into a jeans and a t-shirt, grabs his keys and storms out the door downstairs.
"Fitz, stop. Where are you going?" Jake says stopping him from getting into his car.
"Get out of my way Jake." Fitz says angrily.
"No, you are running on too many emotions to drive." He puts his hand out. "Give me the keys."
"Get out of my fucking way Jake!" Fitz shouts.
Jake crosses his arms in front of his chest.
Fitz swings at him and punches him in the jaw. Jake smiles licking the blood from his lip and ducks the second punch. He wraps Fitz in a bear hug from behind pushing him into the wall in the garage.
"Stop. I don't want to fight you but if that's what you need, if you need to be angry I'll fight you Fitz." Jake says letting him go. "I know what you're thinking and it's not true. You aren't alone anymore, you got me. You and I have always been the ones alone with no parents, no one to care, no one to go to but we still make it somehow. You think no one will miss you if you go do something stupid but you're wrong. You're the only brother I have left." He walks over and wraps his arms around Fitz' shoulders. "Let me be here for you because without you I'm all alone too."
Fitz stands there with his hands by his side still balled in fists. He feels guilty for trying to take on the one person who has proven his brotherhood to him, and the only family he has. Slowly he starts to let go of his pride and calm down. Jake lets him go when he feel him relax and Fitz hands him the keys.
"Come on." Jake says opening the door. "I got this new app that gives a new recipe a day and I know you can't wait to try the one for today." He says laughing.
Fitz wipes a tear from his face and chuckles. "Oh yeah? I think I have that app too." He says walking in the towards the kitchen.
Olivia was sitting in her car in her drive way trying to mask her puffy eyes. When she got out of her car she steps in a puddle and she chuckles at how she didn't even notice the gloomy weather this morning when she left. There could have been a hurricane and all she would have seen was him. She closes her eyes and leans on her car trying not to cry at the thought of him.
"Olivia! Sweetheart, what are you doing?"
She takes a deep breath and shakes him out of her mind. "Nothing dad, I'm coming in."
She grabs her bag and walks into the house.
"Is mom here? I need to talk to her." She says looking around.
"She got called in."
"Of course she did." Olivia says feeling her eyes begin to water again.
"What's wrong? You can talk to me too you know."
"Not about this dad." She says shaking her head.
"Hey," He says catching her arm as she tried to walk off. "I'd like to try. Ok?"
She nods.
"Ok, you get comfy on the couch and I'll meet you there in two minutes."
She grabs the blanket off the back of the couch and wraps it around her as she sits on one end.
"I think we are ready now." Rowan says setting a big bowl of popcorn on the cushion in between them.
She smiles at the fact that he remembered her favorite comfort food. "Thanks dad."
"Of course. Now lay it on me." He says clapping his hands and turning towards her.
"There's this guy.." She glances up to see if he is giving her a look and when he isn't she continues. "That I really like but he did something that I don't know if I can or should forgive."
"For me to be able to give you better advice I need to know what he did."
"He approached me to try and date me with the intention of using me but he says that once he got to know me he called the whole thing off."
"How did you find out about it? One of his friends?"
"No, he told me himself."
"But you don't believe him?" Rowan asks trying to get her to open up more.
"I don't know what to believe dad. I'm so confused." She says starting to get get emotional.
"Well sweetheart, if he was trying to continue to play games he wouldn't have told you the truth. Think of how hard it must have been to carry that burden around after he got to know you, maybe he really was feeling the pressure and knew it was worth the risk of losing you to make sure that you heard the truth from him. How did he react when you left? Was he as broken up as you?"
"He pleaded with me to think about it for a day then let him know if I'm truly done. He even cried dad and said he didn't want to lose me. I've never seen a guy cry before especially over me."
"Sounds like he is in love Liv." Rowan says then and leaves the thought hanging out there for a minute before finishing. "And I think love allows for forgiveness don't you?"
Olivia stares at her father unable to believe the advice he was giving her. Was she in love? She knew she felt more for Fitz than she had ever felt for Mark but is was too soon, was it?
"I can hear you thinking Olivia. Don't try to talk yourself out of it because it's written all over your face. Wait until tomorrow if that makes you more comfortable but let him know that you forgive him and take your time to get to know each other again. Make it clear that you won't tolerate any more games but life's too short to hold back. Anything can happen and you could lose that opportunity."
"You really think that dad?"
"Yes because that look in your eyes, that feeling you're feeling, only comes around once in a life time and I know because that's the look and feeling I have when I see your mother." He says smiling and standing up. "So how did I do?"
"You did great dad. Thank you." She says getting up and giving him a big hug.
"I'm glad I could help."
"Hey, hey. What's going on in here?" Maya asks as she walks through the door.
"It's handled." Rowan says as he lets Olivia go.
"Yes dad helped me out a lot." She gives her mother a kiss on the cheek then runs upstairs to lay down.
"What did I miss?" Maya asks once Olivia was upstairs.
"Our daughter is growing up and becoming a young woman." He wraps his arm around her shoulders. "Come, I'll tell you about it over ice cream."
"Eli you know you aren't supposed to be having too many sweets."
"Give me a break Maya. I just saved our daughter from a crisis. I deserve this ice cream." He says laughing.
Fitz made the dessert perfectly. He takes a picture of it and immediately sent it to Olivia forgetting their current circumstance. He sends a quick follow up text to apologize.
Fitz: Sorry, I wanted to share and my mind immediately thought of you.
"Hey let's get out of here and go to that basketball game you asked me about earlier this week." Jake asks when he notices Fitz going back to that dark place and tries to prevent it.
"I don't know."
"Go get dressed now. We are going. I'll call Huck and Harrison and get them to meet us there."
"Ok."
When he is finished getting dressed he sees a text from Olivia.
Liv: It's ok... It looks good, very good. Goodnight.
Was she going to sleep this early? It was only six. Then he realized that was probably her way of saying don't text her anymore and he feels himself getting upset again.
"Jake?" He says looking around when he gets downstairs.
"In the livingroom!"
"Hey I'm not feeling going to that game anymore I think I'm going to stay here." Fitz says jumping on the couch and placing his feet on the table.
"I figured you would say that. That's why I brought the boys here."
The doorbell rings.
"Here they are now." Jake jumps up and runs to the door.
"What the hell happened to your face?" Harrison asks walking in the house.
"You should see the other guy." Jake says laughing.
"You're right the other guy looks worse." Harrison said once he saw the cut on Fitz' cheek.
"Shut up." Fitz says laughing.
"Seriously, were you guys fighting?" Huck asked.
"Something like that. Fitz explain to them about Olivia."
"Princess? What's she got to do with anything?" Harrison asked.
"First, you're going to stop calling her that. Second, she is my girlfriend and not because of any stupid plan. I really like her and I decided to tell her about the plan and she didn't take it very well."
"Wait, so you told her about the plan and she beat both of you guys up? She must be some type of secret ninja." Harrison said laughing.
"You really are a dumb ass." Fitz says laughing. "If she takes ne back we aren't hiding in front of you guys anymore and if I hear one princess joke you can expect to look like Jake."
"Damn Fitz, you're hooked aren't you? I bet you haven't even slept with her yet, have you?" Huck asked.
"How can you tell?"
"Because if you had you would've been smashed Harrisons face in." He says laughing.
"So Fitz has it bad for a girl. I'm shocked." Harrison says seriously.
"Imagine how I feel." Jake says. "I think I'm still in shock but he is and I'm happy for him."
"Alright so we are watching the game. Where's the food?" Harrison asks.
"You are always hungry!"
They all laugh and kick back joking the rest of the night. Fitz was grateful that he had these guys to help take his mind off of his broken heart. By the time they left he was beat. He went to his bed and laid on the side Olivia was napping on earlier, snuggled in close and went to sleep.
Olivia hadn't left her room once since she got there earlier. She had twenty five missed text messages and she only answered the one that Fitz sent earlier. Her heart was aching for him more now than it ever had before. She hated herself for it too. She was supposed to be mad, to be angry and she expected her parents to cosign with that but her talk with her dad made her miss him even more. She was afraid that if she took him back too quickly that he would think it was ok to hurt her but that couldn't be true because he had always considered her feelings when they were together. He had two opportunities to go all the way and expose the whole plan and embarrass her but he didn't want. If he truly didn't care he wouldn't have done that. She sighs and throws a pillow over her head.
Knock knock.
"Come in!"
"Hey baby girl, how are you feeling?" Maya asks as she takes a seat on the bed.
"A little better." She says sadly.
"You are missing him huh?"
"Dad told you?"
"Mhmm."
"What do you think?"
"I think he is completely right." She says rubbing the top of Olivia's head. "Don't let pride and fear get in the way of something real. It doesn't mean that you weren't upset or that you're weak. It means that you know what you want and you think it's worth a second chance, worth the effort. Your dad said he could see the love in your eyes and he is right honey. I saw it when we were at the hotel, the way your whole body lit up when I said boyfriend it was obvious. There's nothing wrong with that either honey. Your dad and I met in high school and I've never loved him more. Plus, he knows who is really the boss around here." She says laughing.
"Thanks mom. I'm really glad you came to see me and I'm kind of glad you were gone today." Maya raises her eyebrows. "Only because it gave me a chance to hear dad's point of view when before I wouldn't have even asked him."
"Oh ok. I can deal with that explanation." Maya laughed. "Speaking of your dad, he said we would start our family day a little later tomorrow because you had somewhere that you needed to go first?"
"Yes, I think I do." She says smiling.
"Ok, make sure you get a light snack before you actually fall asleep since it's too late to eat a full meal now. Tomorrow we will leave around one when you get back." She kisses her only the forehead and stands. "Goodnight Livia. I love you."
"Good night mom, love you too."
When her mother left she felt more tears threatening to fall. Only this time they were happy tears. As much as her parents frustrated her with the pressures of being great when she really needed them they were always there to support her. She may not agree with their overbearing parenting when it came to school and her activities but they did make an effort to be there for her when they saw she was hurting and she was thankful for that. She knew what she wanted to do about the situation and she knows it's the best choice for her and with that decision made she slept like a baby.
The next morning Olivia put on her favorite skinny sweatpants, a thin long sleeve v neck and her new shoes she bought over the week. She threw her hair up in a messy bun and applied a tiny bit of foundation and headed to Fitz' house. She was more nervous now than she was before he told her about the plan. What if he changed his mind? What if he's moved on? She starts to panic and almost turns back towards her house but she's already there. She walks up to the front door and rings the doorbell praying they weren't sleep at seven am.
"Olivia do you realize what time it is?" Jake says opening the door drying off from the pool.
"Yes, I was wondering if Fitz was up?"
He steps to the side to let her in.
"Yeah we came back from our run about thirty minutes ago. He's probably got his head phones in. Go up there and see."
"Okay, thanks Jake." She says walking towards the stairs.
"Hey Olivia?"
"Yeah?" She turns back to face him.
"Take care of him ok? He has a really good heart and it seems like you bring it out of him more but you need to protect it like will yours."
"Don't worry Jake I'll take care of him." She says giving him a small smile and heading up to see him.
She knocks and when there is no answer she walks in slowly. He is laying on the middle of the bed with his arm thrown over his eyes with his head phones blasting. She couldn't make out the song at first but when she gets closer she smiled at his song choice. She quietly slips her shoes and jacket off and slips on top of the covers with him placing her head on his heart. She feels him tense then relax.
"Livvie?" He says stopping the music. "What are you-"
"Shhh..let me talk first." She says looking up at him. "I'm going to be completely honest with you. I was very close to calling a quits to this whole thing and bury my feelings deep inside for however long it took to get over you. Then I realized that the day I would get over you would probably never come and do you know why?"
He shakes his head.
"Because as far as my heart is concerned you are it for me, Period. I know that's a bold statement considering the length of time we have been together but it's the way I feel. I'm not saying I want us to go get hitched tomorrow but I did want to be honest with you about how deep my feelings are invested in being with you."
"I want to continue to take it slow and I want to get to know you, everything about you. I want to know why you love to cook, who taught you how to cook, why you love the game of basketball, why you have these gatherings but you don't allow alcohol anywhere near them and more about your childhood. I want to know these things but I want you to want share them and trust me enough to know that I would never hurt you with any of that information. Can you do that? Can you allow me in?"
"Yes I can do that. Let me just say how grateful I am that you chose me. I don't think I've ever had anyone do that before. I apologize for the way things got started between us but I'm thankful that it brought me to you and what we have. You say you realized I was it for you? You've been it for me since the moment you came over and spent a day with me and I will spend every day from now, until you're tired of me, showing you that. I'm not perfect and I won't pretend to be but I promise not to hurt you intentionally. We will fight and have disagreements but I think if we talk we should be able to resolve them right?" He asks as he rubs he back slowly.
"Right." She says kissing his chest softly and smiles slightly when she feels him shudder underneath her.
"I've been wanting to say something to you since Friday night." He leans down and gives her a soft kiss. "I love you Livvie, I'm in love with you."
She opens her mouth to say it back and her breath is caught in her chest.
"It's okay. You don't have to say it back I just wanted you to know and the only reason I didn't say it yesterday is because I didn't want you to think I was using it as a ploy to get you to stay." He squeezes her close to him.
She scoots up close to his mouth and pulls his bottom lip gently in her mouth teasing him while keeping her eyes locked on his. She let's it go and kisses up his jaw to his ear and whispers, "I love you too Fitz, I'm in love with you too." She leans back and looks in his eyes and kisses him again.
"Would you like to go out on a date with me?" She asks shyly.
"I would go to the end of the earth with you if you wanted me too. As long long as we are together and by together I mean not hiding from our friends. Your father doesn't have to know but the rest of the world will know where my heart is." He said giving her a smile that made her knees weak.
"I agree, I love you and I don't care who knows. We can hide it from my dad until the season is over then I don't care if he likes it or not. Although, I think he may be more receptive that I thought." She smiles back and slides back down to lay on his chest.
"Can you put that song back on that you were listening to when I walked in without the headphones? I've been listening to it too.."
He unplugged his headphones and pressed play.
"I'm lost without you, can't help myself. How does it feel to know that I love you baby. I'm lost without you, can't help myself. How does it feel to know that I love you baby. "
He hugged her tightly to his body and smiled as the song played throughout the room.
A/N: I didn't want to drag out a win me back session over a few chapters so I tried to express all of their feelings in this one. How did I do? Let me know what you thought! Thanks for reading! Til next time.
PS. Let me know some date suggestions that you have? It's been awhile since I've been in high school so I don't remember what we did lol
Song is Robin Thicke "Lost without You"