Ch 3

Crash Bang Boom

Dr Dre and M and M were cruisin in there low riders tryin to find that Bandibastard. It was common knowledge by now that Crash was wanted in every state sans the state of Michigan cause they just didnt give a fuck by now. The FBI had lost wind of him and were putting up posters just like in that one movie where the cops put up the posters of that one guy and the bounty hutners find him except this time Dre and the M'ster were going to get 'er doooone.

I think it was the Beavis and Butthead movie

"Heeeey! How much farther is it to Michigan!?" Eminem asked, his crusty red candy coating digging into his chocolatey backside, "My shell is killing me! I can't wait to get out of this rust bucket and grab some poon!"

"Yo M y'all just gotta keep it real Cortex is payin us big dolla dolla money fo this job real." Dre responded, cranking the volume dial to eleven as the gangman style flowed through the radio waves.

"Y'all turn left at dis light n we be there soon"

Crash sure enough was lurking the slums of Detroit. A pack of friendly rottweilers had taken him in as their cub and he was prowling the dumpsters in search of used condom wrappers for nourishment as all of his spare change was being used to fund his 3G so he could get some runescapin in.

Just because he accidently fucked his sister before didn't mean it had to happen again, I mean there were at least 5 other women on this game! There was no way he was gonna let that mistake happen twice,

"No sisters lol" he reminded himself.

It took him about 4 men pretending to be chicks, selling his entire set of rare goodies to please them, and getting his anus virtually pounded to death by Tiny Tiger to make Crash realize that the virtual world of mmmoe arpga (MMORPG) was no good.

"Fuck zezima" he spun his laptop across the room with a spin and off Crash goes. Crash stopped by Gamestop who stopped him and said " hey stop in and stop your wallet down by the door stop and buy some game"

Crash bought the new Hatsoonee Meeku Project Deevah for his psTriple. But they were sold out so Crash really bought God of War collection for $10 cause it was all he had left.

"RAH RAH RAH RAH" Kratos was mad.

Crash plugged his earholes. "Wow wtf this replaced me why sega I thought I was ur blur man. Why you gotta be mature I can fuck" Crash was getting fucking furious.

SNOOP DORG APPROACHES

"Sup ya'll snigaliga" he says.

"FUCK YOU SNOOP YOU AREN'T EVEN BY DA FOOT" Crash rips snoop dog's muzzle off to reveal the mane of a majestic lion and snnopps lion is created.

"Wow thank you Crash I can now smoke the weed as a respectable adult." Snoop Lion tells him.

"Fuuuuuuck youuuuuuuuuu" Crash says back he is not in the mood for between the lions and their bullshit so he flips his bird a little because he just took a piss and he needs to get that shit dry, then he gives snoop the finger and books his first place back to Japan to find his anime games.

Crash was all out of Cash but he was able to make the difference to get on the plane because he found a very old friend in the airport terminal.

"Brosama is that you!?" Crash had met Brosama Aladin his good buddy on the internet, they had shared a runescape beer together and were the best of virtual buddy.

"Woah Crash! hush hush I am supposed to be dead lol I am going to bomb the plane"

"Woah fuck no man I need the plane to take me to japan!" he announces with fury

"Hey woah man why you nos ay this sooner good friend I put you inside bomb and sn eak to you plane and they put you in free of charge as my luggage. Instead of boom plane we take oyu to tokyo boom town and you get big anime!"

Crash liked the sound of this plan, and the idea of big anime gave him a big erection.

"It was as it sounds, as solid deal" Crash announces and they fly to Japan just as Dre and th arrive to see them fly away.

"WELL SHIT HOW THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA CHASE THEM DOWN NOW!?" the M and M had severe anger issues possibly as a direct result of him being a piece of fucking candy.

"Be chill yo I got me a private jet" Said dre as he whipped out his iphone11, "Ye man, get me Jay Jay."

All the while Cortex had spent the day exploring his hairy yellow backdoor, waiting for his plans to unfold as he scrapped the small crumpets of shit from his buttocks and into his long, boney fingernails. Boney M was there too they played some sweet Raspyewtin while he did the deed.

TO BE CONTINUED