A/N: Oh look at that it's 12:30AM instead of 2AM! Are you proud of me? If the answer is yes, I'm gonna give you a virtual hug *hug* Okay, clearly I am strange whether I'm tired or not. Thank you for the reviews for the last chapter guys :) It's funny actually, because I read a review where the person was wondering about something, and I didn't really know the answer, but today at the most random moment I had this huge epiphany moment. BUT. I can't tell you yet cuz it's like in a few chapters or so :P
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Glee!
PLEASE enjoy, favorite, follow and REVIEW!
Chapter 7
Glee club was a little awkward later. Santana and Quinn were sitting next to each other, but there was definite tension in between them, and they spent most of the time pretending not to notice that the other was there. They listened to Rachel sing some Barbra Streisand song, and heard more arguing about Sectionals.
Quinn was practically praying for the end of Glee Club to come when Mr. Shue finally dismissed them. She gave Santana a small smile as a "see you later" and then grabbed her bag and left.
She drove home in her fancy, red Mustang and was at her empty house in no time. She lazily dropped her school bag on the floor by the front door and went upstairs to her room. As soon as she stepped in, she realized that she really didn't have anything to do.
Then her phone vibrated in her hand. She plopped down onto her desk chair and looked to see who had texted her.
From Rachel-Gleemergency!
Quinn rolled her eyes.
To Rachel-What?
From Rachel-Our two new members aren't involved in the club at all, and we need them to be because we have SECTIONALS coming up!
Quinn sighed, but she suddenly felt nervous.
To Rachel-Sorry 'bout that. Lots of stuff going on, haven't been able to focus during anything.
After about five minutes of waiting for a reply, Quinn huffed setting down her phone and getting up to change into more comfortable clothes. When she came back to her desk, she saw a new text message.
From Rachel-Do you want to talk more?
Quinn's stomach twisted up inside her. Yes, Quinn, you need to talk to somebody. Talk to Rachel.
To Rachel-Maybe.
From Rachel-Call me.
Ugh, phone calls make it even harder to talk. But she clicked the call button anyways, her need to talk to someone about her problems growing inside her. "Hey Quinn!" came Rachel's all too cheery answer. "How are you."
Quinn rolled her eyes. "I'm just wonderful, Rachel!" she exclaimed, faking excitement. "I can barely talk to my best friend, who also happens to be the girl who I've been crushing on so desperately!"
"Fine, I guess we'll get right to the hard stuff then," Rachel grumbled. "You were sitting by her today."
"We talked in the Choir Room during lunch. She tried to explain to me about all this stuff that I got mad at her about."
"Like what?"
"Like the fact that she replaced me with Brittany and how we hardly talk and crap like that," Quinn muttered. "She said that she, too, is going through hard stuff and that it's easier to talk about it to Brittany."
"Well, it's easier for you to talk about this with me, right?" Rachel asked. Quinn sighed, feeling defeated already.
"I guess."
"So maybe you should really consider the fact that she's going through some rough stuff. Things like this happen in true friendships. Trust me, I know," Rachel insisted.
"I just... I wish I knew what was up with her. I feel like that would make it better, you know?" Quinn mumbled.
"You know what, I bet she's saying the same thing about you to Brittany right now," Rachel teased. "You and Santana are a lot alike, and I can tell that just by what I've seen and heard from my place down here in loserdom."
"Oh c'mon Rachel, you're not a loser," Quinn insisted, rolling her eyes.
Rachel chuckled. "Well I'm glad to hear you say that, but the slushy facials I've received would tell me otherwise. That aside..."
She paused, and Quinn spoke instead, "One of the biggest problems... is that even if Santana and I reconcile and become friends again, that's not really... that's not really what I want."
"What do you want?"
"I... I don't know."
"You have to know what you want, Quinn. Think really hard," Rachel told her. "Deep down, we all know what we really, really want.'
Quinn took a deep breath. She'd been going over this for weeks almost, but she hadn't been able to say out loud what she was about to tell Rachel. "I... I want to... I want to be with her. Like, as more than friends, but I know that'll ever happen."
"You never know until you know, Quinn," Rachel told her simply, as if that made all the sense in the world. "I'll see you in Glee." The line ended, and Quinn just sat at her desk, a look of confusion painted over her face.
You never know until you know.
What did that even mean?
The next day, Quinn woke up a little excited. One, she didn't have Cheerios Practice because Coach Sue had gotten some interview for some Cheerleading magazine so she was gone for the day. Plus, today she would get to hear Santana say one more little bit of her problems.
Unfortunately, that meant that Quinn had to think of something to say to Santana before lunch time.
She spent all her first three class periods racking her brain for something to say that made sense but didn't give herself away just yet. She tried over and over again to think of something, but she found that when Santana stepped into the Choir Room during the second half of lunch, she was at a loss for what to say.
"Hey, S," Quinn greeted her with a smile.
"You go first," is all Santana said.
Quinn bit her bottom lip and let words just come out. "There's this feeling I get sometimes. Like I'm so confused, and sad, but also relaxed, and yet extremely exhausted. I can't stop thinking things that make me get this feeling. There's no happy place I feel like I can go without having this constant feeling around me, inside me, and I can't get rid of it."
Well, maybe I could, if I could have what I want.
Second bit, check!
Santana nodded slowly, processing this. "I understand," she said. "I have that feeling sometimes."
There was a pause, and Quinn responded with, "I hope that wasn't your bit of the day, heh."
"Nope," Santana said with a teasing roll of her eyes. "Actually... I need to tell you during Glee Club, is that okay?"
Quinn blinked, a little surprised by the question. "Yeah, that's fine. How's your day going?"
"Pretty good," Santana answered, hesitantly sitting in one of the chairs in front of Quinn. "It was nice to have a break from Cheerios."
Quinn snorted. "You're telling me," she teased. Santana's lips turned up into a smile. Her perfect, kissable, soft looking lips... Oh my god, Fabray, quit it!
"How's your day?"
"Boring as hell," Quinn answered, rolling her eyes. "I can't wait until Winter Break."
"Same here," Santana agreed with a nod of her head. "It's only a couple weeks away now."
"Yeah, it'll be here before we know it," Quinn piped up, smiling. Then Mr. Shue walked into the room, smiling at them.
"Well, I'm glad you girls like the Choir Room this much," he joked. Quinn and Santana locked glances and chuckled.
"We were just about to leave for class, Mr. Shue. See you in Glee," Quinn said, standing and giving him a slight wave as the two girls left the room. "See you later, S."
"Yeah, see you, Q."
As Quinn parted with her crush, she couldn't help but wonder what Santana was going to say to her in Glee Club?
The rest of the day went by in a blur, and then before she knew it, Quinn was sitting in the Choir Room again, next to Santana, with all the other students sitting around them. Mr. Shue got up in front of them.
"Okay guys, so before we start any sort of lesson, we have a song to hear first," he said with a clap of his hands.
There were a few groans, and Tina snapped at Rachel, "We have to listen to you sing another song, Berry? Don't you think that we all might get tired of your voice after a while?"
"Uh, excuse me?" Rachel squeaked.
"You sing beautifully, Rachel, but sometimes the constant singing in front of us to remind us that gets annoying," Kurt pointed out.
"But i—"
"Relax Lady-Face," Santana suddenly said with a roll of her eyes. "I'm singing, not Rachel."
Quinn suddenly quirked up and eyebrow, and Santana just gave her a quick glance before avoiding eye contact. She got up from where she was sitting and sat on the stool that Mr. Shue had just placed in the center of the room. Santana looked back at the piano player and nodded slightly.
She started singing.
"I'm just a normal girl,
That sank when I fell overboard,
My ship would leave the country,
But I'd rather swim ashore...
Without a life vest I'd be stuck again,
Wish I was much more masculine,
Maybe then I could learn to swim,
Like 'Fourteen Miles Away'..."
Quinn recognized the song. It was a Blue October song, one that she hadn't heard in a while either.
Now floating up and down,
"I spin, colliding into sound,
Like whales beneath me diving down,
I'm sinking to the bottom of my,
Everything that freaks me out,
The lighthouse beam has just run out,
I'm cold as cold as cold as cold can be... be..."
Quinn was pretty sure she could understand what this song was going to be about. It was sort of funny actually, because it pretty much described the feeling Quinn had tried to explain earlier during lunch.
"I want to swim away, but don't know how!
Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean!
Let the waves up and take me down!
Let the hurricane set in motion, yeah!
Let the rain of what I feel right now, come down!
Let the rain come down..."
Rachel was right after all. Santana must be struggling with something pretty similar to Quinn, if she was feeling this way too.
"Where is the coastguard,
I keep looking each direction,
For a spotlight give me something,
I need something for protection,
Maybe a flotsam junk will do just fine,
The jetsam sunk I'm left behind,
I'm treading for my life believe me,
How can I keep up this breathing?"
Santana took a breath.
"Not knowing how to think,
I scream aloud; begin to sink,
My legs and arms are broken down,
With envy for the solid ground,
I'm reaching for the life within me,
How can one girl stop her ending?
I thought of just your face,
Relaxed and floated into space..."
Quinn took a deep breath, for a moment feeling as though she completely understood what Santana was going through, even though really, she still didn't know exactly what was up with Santana.
"I want to swim away, but don't know how!
Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean!
Let the waves up and take me down!
Let the hurricane set in motion, yeah!
Let the rain of what I feel right now, come down!
Let the rain come down..."
Santana looked at Quinn.
"Now waking to the sun,
I calculate what I had done,
Like jumping from the bow, yeah,
Just to prove that I knew how, yeah,
It's midnight's late reminder of,
The loss of her, the one I love,
My will to quickly end it all,
Sat front row in my need to fall."
Quinn's breath caught in her throat. The one I love... Of course, it was just a song, and Santana just meant losing her best friend. But still, Quinn wished so badly that it would mean... the real sort of love.
"Into the ocean, end it all,
Into the ocean, end it all,
Into the ocean, end it all,
Into the ocean, end it all..."
Santana lowered her gaze.
"I want to swim away, but don't know how!
Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean!
Let the waves up and take me down!
Let the hurricane set in motion, yeah!
Let the rain of what I feel right now, come down!
Let the rain come down..."
Quinn hadn't really noticed but the rest of the club, aside from her, were singing quietly in the background, and they slowly faded out, ending the song. Suddenly they all began to rapidly applause, and Quinn joined in, smiling at the Latina in understanding. That was the bit that Quinn got to know today. In song version.
Santana, flushing bright red, hurried to her seat next to Quinn, who told her surely, "You sounded really good, S."
"Thanks," Santana muttered. "My bit today was almost just like yours."
"Yeah, but yours definitely sounded much better than mine," the blonde joked. Santana smiled, blushing slightly again as Mr. Shue stepped up and complimented the girl's voice.
That night, Quinn laid on her bed thinking carefully. How many things would she be able to come up with to say to Santana before telling her flat out that she liked her? She didn't want to mess everything up, but what if she told Santana too soon, and she did? What if Santana would never talk to her again? What if—
Her phone buzzed.
From Santana-Stop thinking so much and go to sleep. Don't fall into the ocean! See ya tomorrow, girlie.
Quinn smiled. Of course after telling Santana her little bit today they could relate better, since they both had the same feeling.
To Santana-Okay, but you better not fall into the ocean, either. There are sharks in there, you know? And slimy fish, ew.
From Santana-I won't if you don't...
To Santana-I won't. See you tomorrow, S (:
Smiling to herself and setting her phone down, Quinn closed her eyes and let a thoughtless sleep overtake her.
Did you guys like it?
Okay, on with my excessive speaking (typing...?)
The song in this chapter was Into The Ocean by Blue October. Amazing song, if you haven't heard it, go listen to it right this second. Funny actually, I wasn't planning on having a song in this chapter when I started writing it. But I was on YouTube looking up songs I haven't heard in a while and came across this one! And I was like "OMG PERF!" This was actually my favorite song when I was younger, it was like the first song that I ever memorized all the words too. I remember walking through a store with my parents like singing the lyrics over and over again from a little piece of paper that I'd printed lol :)
Okay enough about ME though.
YOU guys should review and tell me what you thought. Also, please tell me if you think the pace that this is going is good. I feel great about it, which is new for me lol, so I hope you guys feel the same.
Two last things. Do my A/N's make you guys laugh, cuz that is one of my goals in posting these updates lol? Follow me on Twitter at BrittzandTana! Tweet me that you read my update and I'll give you a nice big SHOUTOUT! :D See you next time lovelies ;)