Disclaimer: All characters belong to Square-Enix. sadface :(

Another long post! To make up for a long delay! R&R

The First Step

Morning rolled around sooner than Lina had expected—even though she knew she'd fallen asleep rather early last night. She shuffled under the light protection of her sleeping bag, feeling the morning sunlight on her face behind her eyelids. Then, she heard movement beside her and the light disappeared from her face. Exhaling, she opened her eyes slowly from a weary sleep and saw none other than Zell.

"Wha...?" she uttered, rolling over onto her stomach and propping herself up with her elbows. "What are you doing here?"

"Selphie had to step out, and I happened to be passing by," he explained. He was seated, cross-legged, so close to her that she could feel his every movement in the floor under her. Lina sighed deeply, shaking the morning weariness from her bones and sit up, holding her legs to her chest and sitting across from Zell.

"Hi," she smiled.

"Hey." He couldn't help but smile back.

"So," she said. "Tell me! How was it?" Zell sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Horrible," he admitted and Lina's smile immediately faded.

"How come? You were so excited!" She looked sad for him, and for some reason her concern made him smile a little bit. He suppressed a chuckle behind his lips.

"She's so...sensitive to everything I said," he sighed. "I mean, she almost cried about salad. I had to watch what I said the whole night."

"Well maybe that just means she really cares about what you think?" Lina suggested. "Maybe you should just keep trying?"

"Nah," Zell shrugged it off. "The Sadie thing...it's not a big deal, Lina, don't worry. It just didn't work out." He watched her face when he said this, and her reaction seemed light-hearted.

"I'm sorry, Zell," Lina smiled softly. She shuffled in her seat to reposition herself, spreading her legs out against the carpet away from where Zell was sitting and hugged a pillow to her chest. Then she looked up at him timidly, and something about her soft movements made Zell fidget in his seat. "I saw Seifer again yesterday..."

"Squall told me," he said quickly. His jaw clenched, his lips in a line. "That bastard. He has no reason to be here anymore."

"He...implied he knew something about my past," Lina said. She tried hard to cover the curiosity in her voice, but he seemed to notice anyway.

"Lina, do not believe anything that bastard says." His eyes were wide and he looked straight at her. "He says things just to get what he wants. He doesn't actually mean it." Lina nodded and looked down at her feet.

"Zell?"

"Hm?"

"Why do you hate him so much?" Lina was curious. Now it was Zell's turn to look down at his feet.

"He thinks he's better than everyone...but he's same as all of us...and he used to...bully me," he started, struggling with some secret struggle. "You know...Sometimes there are people who just...pick on you for no goddamn reason." Lina nodded, but she looked up at Zell to see his face red with concentration.

"That's what I used to think about you, Zell," she said quietly. He looked up at her suddenly, and she timidly met his gaze with careful eyes. He felt something hard drop to his stomach, his throat tangled as he watched the corners of her lips curve into a shy smile. "Until yesterday I mean."

"Lina..." he managed to say. Without realizing, he reached his hand over and gently curled his warm fingers around her wrist. He watched as she flinched, but then gently settled under his touch into a mild blush—that's when he noticed, but he didn't move his hand. "Sorry I hurt you. I didn't mean to. I don't ever mean to."

"Thank you, Zell," Lina smiled. "I know you didn't." She pulled her hand back subtly. It was strange for her, being so close, especially because she still understood in her heart that she'd just been a tool for Zell to get closer to Sadie—and in her mind, she still grouped the two of them together even though Zell had just explained how badly the date went. Maybe, though, just maybe, things had changed. But was she ready to accept that change? She wasn't sure...

"So, see you later? Project, in my room?" Zell stood up, Lina did too.

"Uh...do you...still want me to? I mean, since you've had your date with Sadie and seem to be fine now..."

"I told you, date with Sadie was bad," he said, blunt as always. He took a step closer to her. "And yes, Lina. I want you to come." She nodded, but she wasn't smiling. The gears in her head were spinning. What did anything before today mean? Why was he determined to spend time with her? None of it added up, so Lina shut it off completely, still nodding. "Okay if you REALLY need an excuse, I'm your mentor, remember? I should help you with your project."

Lina smiled. Zell gave her a gleeful look and then walked out the door. Outside the door, the content of their entire conversation was just now creeping into Zell's memory. Her laugh, and his actions finally set in his head. He had, of all things, apologized¸ without even stuttering and he suddenly felt strangely comfortable with her. Standing there, he felt happy. And he enjoyed it.

As Zell left, Selphie walked in. "Wow," Lina said. "Not even a second by myself. I'm impressed by you SeeDs."

"What can I say!" Selphie giggled. "We do our job. Why in the world are you smiling like that?"

"Wha? Like what? I like smiling! Why does everyone ask me--"

"No! I mean like that..." Selphie leaned in closer and examined her face carefully. "Oh my god. You like him! I knew it!"

"Definitely NOT, Selphie!" Lina retorted quickly. "I smile a lot, just get over it!"

"Oh yeah, mmHMMM, I only smile like that to Irvine," Selphie said.

"That's your problem, not mine!" Lina said, then crossed her arms over her chest and stuck her tongue out. "Neeehh!!"

"Say what you like, the smile says it all!!" Selphie called. Lina shook her head, ignoring Selphie's teasing. She was just determined to tie Lina to any boy within her range. Last week the cafeteria, some random guy stared in Lina's general direction, probably getting a good look at the menu hanging above her head, but Selphie nudged her in the arm anyway and told her to give him a wink. Ridiculous!

She didn't like Zell, she was sure. She just thought of him as a friend, and he felt the same way, she was sure. Then she remembered how he'd warmly touched her wrist—and how she hadn't recoiled...no. They were friends, that was it! She had decided.

--

The sun feels nice, Lina thought as she walked down the hall. She'd snuck away from Squall's boring meeting by convincing him she was on her way to Zell's to work on their project. It's just a minute's walk, she told him, and in broad daylight. If she saw Seifer, she would sprint back, she promised. Finally a moment alone, she thought to herself, where she could just enjoy the sunlight on her shoulders without having to worry about keeping conversation with anyone.

Sadie was walking the opposite direction when Lina saw her and smiled politely as they passed each other; she saw the smile reciprocated, but they'd barely stepped a yard beyond until when they heard yelling that stopped them in their tracks.

"Weeelll...what am I supposed to do, Zell?" it was Irvine and his voice sounded amused, if anything, as if he didn't take what Zell had said to him very seriously.

"I'm fucking admitting it, Irvine. It's a big deal to me," Zell tried to explain. He sounded frustrated, irritated, annoyed, brash as ever. Lina turned her head ever so slightly. First she saw Sadie, not even concealing that she was trying to eavesdrop, ears perked up and face turned directly in their direction. Then she saw them, walking by Irvine's doorway, Irvine swaggering along as usual, his hips swaying left and right, then Zell closely behind him, in his usual aggressive stance.

"So you like a girl. Congratulations!" Irvine joked, then chuckled to himself.

"A lot, Irvine. And I shouldn't." Irvine stopped.

"Shouldn't? What? Who are we talking 'bout?!" This was apparently news to Irvine—that Zell like someone he shouldn't. That's when they finally realized their conversation was not private. Lina caught out of the corner of her eye Zell, who looked completely shocked, glancing from Sadie to Lina and back at Irvine.

"STUPID!" Zell slapped himself on the forehead and gave Irvine a rough shove so that they both stumbled down the hall. Lina couldn't suppress a chuckle, but thought nothing of it. Sadie, however, looked delighted. She looked at Lina, her gleeful grin shining.

"They're funny," Lina said, but Sadie's look was serious and excited.

"I think...I think they were talking about me..." she whispered, then grinned quietly to herself and walked quickly down the hall. Lina smiled, still enjoying her peace and quiet alone until she remember what Zell had told her that very morning. The Sadie thing...it's not a big deal, Lina, don't worry. It just didn't work out. Lina's smile faded. Who was the 'her' he was talking about then? She remembered their conversation...he reached his hand over and gently curled his warm fingers around her wrist. No, it was impossible. It must be someone else she hadn't heard of yet, and before her thoughts became more tangled than they already were, she dismissed them.

--

More books. Lina was so close to being done with the research portion of her project, she just need more books. So there she was at the Garden library, sitting at a little round table near the back shelves and skimming through a few pages. She looked around—there were people sitting in the table next to her—she wasn't technically alone, so she wasn't breaking any rules.

Two books that she found would be useful. She took them to checkout where she met a still-cheerful Sadie, and headed back to the Dormitory. Lina walked without thoughts, looking here and there and enjoying the lively Garden scenery. That is, until she saw him yet again, standing, arms crossed, back leaned against the wall. She almost dropped her books—almost. He was looking at her.

How suspicious would it be to turn around and sprint now to Zell's room?

"You think I'm lying, don't you?" he said, his voice sharp.

"Why are you following me, Seifer?!" she demanded. He raised his eyebrows without moving the rest of his body.

"Your mother's name was Julia," he said, completely ignoring her question, and not even looking at her face to sense her wide-eyed gaze. "You were born in the city of Deling--"

"Stop it!" she yelled. "Yes, I think you're lying."

"Aw, tsk tsk tsk," he shrugged himself from the wall and took a step closer to her. Lina froze in her place, terrified as he approached her. He leaned in so he was only a few inches away from her. Act, Lina thought, run! But nothing in her responded. She felt her bones quivering, but she couldn't move. He swept the back of his fingers along her cheek then under her chin. He leaned his face in. "Poor girl," he whispered. "They're the ones lying to you. I have all the answers you want." Lina felt his breath along her neck, tingling where his words landed on her skin and she shivered. "Just come with me."

Lina finally responded to her logic. She pushed him away roughly, grasping onto her books, and walked promptly down the hall. She looked over her shoulder and saw Seifer lean right back against wall and smirk at her. She turned her head back around and tried to walk as calmly as she could.

But as soon as she turned the corner, she sprinted. With everything in her she sprinted, the terror exciting adrenaline. She almost ran into Zell's door, but rapped on the door with a free knuckle.

"Coming..." she heard muffled from the other side. As soon as he opened the door, she pressed pass him and threw the books and her book bag on his bed, "What the hell are you--" she grabbed his wrist before he could finish his sentence and sprinted out the door, dragging him along. "Lina!"

She didn't respond, and pulled him around the corner, to exactly the spot.

He was no where to be seen.

But...

But he was here just a second ago.

Desperately, she turned around to face Zell. "Seifer," she said, breathless. "He was here. Literally ten seconds ago...He...said things to me." He straightened immediately, jumping from corner to corner of the hall, looking around for him. Lina stood there, completely lost. Her thoughts had broken loose and now they were swirling violently in her mind.

"Lina," Zell stood in front of her again. "You were alone weren't you?" Her eyes didn't look at him, they wandered side to side, the gears in her brain spinning and spinning. He had said...Julia? Who is Julia? Where was she born? Was he...really telling the truth? Lies!...Lies? Was he lying?

"I...Yes...I was, I..." she stuttered, but she couldn't finish a sentence. Her mind was stirring now with questions she knew no one but Seifer could answer. "Zell, I'm...sorry..." Lina realized her breathing became heavy with tension, her voice distressed.

"Lina? Lina," Zell tried to get her attention. "Come on, Lina, it's okay." She finally looked up at him but her eyes were wide with confusion. They were watering, brimming with her apparent fear. "Lina..." He did something she wasn't expecting.

He pulled his arms around her and drew her against his chest. "Calm down, it's okay," he said gently into her hair. Lina felt his arm lock around her back and waist, felt his warmth spreading through her, and slowly, her breathing began to regulate. And she did something that surprised them both. She curled her arms around him too, pulling him closer to her and tightly. And they stood, locked against each other for those seconds that felt like minutes, like hours, until finally, Lina pulled away.

"Thank you, Zell..." she murmured. "I don't know what...came over me..."

"It's alright. Let's go back to my room, we can talk about it there," he directed, and they headed back together.

--

"Lina. I told you not to be alone. You could've been hurt," Squall said, his word firm as ever. Rinoa sat quietly by his side, letting him handle the situation. Lina sighed; she felt Zell's hand immediately on her shoulder, trying to comfort her. It didn't matter. She was the one who'd asked Squall to come, even though she'd told the whole story to Zell, who was convinced it'd be better just to let the whole thing go. "You are to stay with Zell and work on your project until someone else can take you under their wing, understood?"

"Yes, Squall..." Lina sighed again. "But Squall? Do you have any idea why...?" Squall shook his head.

"I don't know his motive, or what interest he's taken particularly with you," he said and rubbed his forehead. He turned his eyes to Rinoa and his expression softened. "All I can guess is that he's after a bigger prize, and I will not stand for that."

"I understand, Squall. Thanks for talking to me," Lina tried to smile, but she couldn't; too much was on her mind. Squall nodded, stood up from Zell's floor, pulled Rinoa up with him and walked out. Lina sighed and looked up at Zell who seemed to already have his eyes on her. "What if he's telling the truth?"

Zell shrugged, trying to appear complacent, but unable to hide his concern in the topic with eager eyes, "I guess... it's possible, but what if he isn't?"

"You're right," Lina sighed and crossed her arms, leaning the back of her head against the bed frame. She still had hope, a single strand that maybe, just maybe, she was one step closer to understanding what mattered most to her: the past. "But he would've given up by now...He's had me alone several times, and hasn't done anything but talk to me, and..." her voice trailed off.

"And what?" Zell demanded quickly.

"Well...earlier, he...I don't know," Lina felt uncomfortable talking about it. She recreated her motion with her own hand, tracing along her cheek to her chin, "touch my face..." She looked up. Zell's face was absolutely red with anger. He seemed as if he was about to combust, but he stifled it behind gritted teeth.

"It seems clear what he wants, the goddamn bastard. If I ever see him... I swear..." Zell began to mutter profanities under his breath.

"But Squall thinks it's something more—that he's trying to get information on what Squall's planning for the attack," Lina thought out loud, mostly to herself as Zell continued with his silent tirade of obscenities.

"I don't want him anywhere near you," Zell declared loudly. He made a face. "Just the thought of him touching you makes me sick."

"And besides," Lina wasn't paying attention to him. She was on the same train of thought she'd followed up a moment before his comment. "Of all the girls, why would he try so hard to come all the way over here just to try to seduce me? It just doesn't make sense."

"Why do you say that?" Zell asked suddenly. Lina looked up at him. He had an interest Lina could not interpret written in his misty blue eyes.

"Well," Lina sighed. "I'm not unique or very pretty. The only appeal I have to him is that I'm close to Squall and Rinoa and you. Otherwise, I'm very...plain."

"I don't think you're plain at all," Zell said, the tone of his voice soft and gentle. Lina glanced up at him. "And you're one of the most interesting people I know."

"I doubt Seifer cares whether or not I'm interesting," Lina chuckled at the thought. It didn't seem to affect her that Zell was throwing her an honest compliment. Zell was confused why she had no reaction to it. He'd counted on it to give her a hint—prod her mind a little bit in the right direction.

"Still, you're not plain," he stated. Lina just rolled her eyes. Zell watched her, but made no reaction.

"If you say so, Zell..." she muttered, then pulled over her book and flipped through the pages without specifically reading anything. Zell watched her. When was it his feelings about Lina had started to change? Was it the night at the party? Was it on the dance floor just a couple days before? He admired as her slender fingers deftly worked across the book, and gazed furtively at the light smile on her lips. She stopped suddenly, then looked up to meet his gaze with those big brown eyes he'd grown to enjoy watching, "Hey, Zell. You said that you don't want him anywhere near me. Why?"

"Because he's a dirty bastard!" Zell yelled, then laughed to himself. He rubbed a hand across his eye and Lina smiled along with him.

"No, I mean..." she tried to clarify herself. "Why does it matter so much to you?" Zell stopped laughing, but still had an amused look on his face.

"Lina, is it really that hard to believe that I care about you?" he asked. Lina laughed, loud and hearty. Zell chuckled, admiring her full laugh filling the room. The very melodic ring that'd pulled him to her the night of the dance. He remembered how he'd wanted to capture that sound in his memory, and how that was his original motive for approaching her that night.

"Yes!! It is very hard to believe," Lina said when she'd finished laughing.

"Oh, come on..." he shoved her arm as her giggles finally subsided.

"You! Zell Dincht, who just two short days ago yelled at me to 'stay the hell away.' Zell Dincht, who felt compelled to tell me that you felt sorry for me! You care about me?"

"Can't we forget about that already?" Zell scratched the back of his head, and Lina smiled at his reaction. She suddenly felt bad that it made him uncomfortable to talk about, but inside, she felt a bubbling warmth that he really didn't mean to hurt her, and really wanted to tuck it all away into the past and pretend it never happened.

"Of course," Lina said lightly. "I'm just poking fun at you, that's all."

"And, I do care about you, Lina. More than you think apparently, so there!" He said, controlling his voice like it was a retort, just a comeback. But when he said it, he felt the words rolling not just out of his mouth, but out of his chest—like they held heavier significance in his being than any other words he said.

Lina smiled. "Thank you, Zell." He nodded, but he didn't say anything for a while. Lina went back to work flipping through her book.

"So...would you follow him?" Zell asked after a moment of silence. Lina thought to herself.

"The temptation is there," Lina said, and Zell looked a little pale. "But...I don't think I trust him still..." Zell nodded and looked down at his hands. She smiled a little bit, he looked awfully docile, sitting there, all quiet-like. He looked almost likeable even.

"Don't," he muttered quietly. "Please." Lina looked up from her book to him, and he was watching her reaction with careful eyes. In that second, she glimpsed how vulnerable he felt in the anticipation of her reply. And how eager he was to hear it. She felt that warmth boil in her chest.

"If it means that much to you, I'll put the thought of it out of my mind, Zell," Lina smiled, and he smiled back.

"Good!" he said loud and cheerful, and she laughed along with him. "Now, let's work!"

Zell had decided to take charge this time. He wanted to actually be a mentor and not have Squall or Cid get on his back for making Lina do all of the work herself. He had seen how exhausted the work had made Lina, and he suddenly realized that he might be to blame for that. Besides, he didn't want to see Lina suffer through all the work, and he wasn't stupid. He asked for the paper Lina had been working on. She'd already finished nine pages and was just working on a good conclusion to make of the essay.

She handed him the nine pages and the two of them went to work. Lina doing more research as the day progressed and Zell going through every single page on her essay and racking his brain to see if he could help with anything.

So far so good, until it got to nighttime and the two of them were absolutely exhausted.

"Okay, this is stupid," Zell muttered, tossing the papers across the table.

"What?" Lina asked. She was lying on her stomach on the bed, the books in front of her, but she rolled over on her back and closed her eyes at his remark. "Working so hard for something that shouldn't even judge how well prepared you are for SeeD? I know."

"Well, that too, and the fact that I haven't eaten in almost five hours," Zell added, looking up at the clock on the wall. Lina glanced up at the time, but couldn't seem to read the hands of the clock upside down. "That's it, I'm getting food from the cafeteria, what do you want?"

"Um...a salad," Lina said, not really thinking.

"Oh no, Lina," Zell started. Lina opened her eyes and looked up at him.

"What??" she asked.

"Don't do this to me..."

"What!? What am I doing??" she sat up, a little shocked.

"Why a salad? What is it with you girls and salads? Is it some rule that all girls must eat leaves and dressing every day??" he asked. Lina made a face and he laughed.

"Eeww, Zell! Don't group me!" she joked. "Fine. Get me a hot dog. NO! Wait. Give me TWO hot dogs!" She held up two fingers to emphasize her point. "Then judge me once I'm done scarfing them down!" She made a motion like she was stuffing hot dogs in her face. Zell laughed out loud, his voice loud and handsome.

"Now THAT'S what I'm talking about!" he yelled. "Sadie would NEVER say something like that!" Lina giggled, but then the volume of her laughter slowly diminished as she remembered earlier today.

"Um, Zell...about Sadie," she said, and Zell cocked his head to the side. It was kind of cute and Lina couldn't suppress a little smile as she spoke, "I think she's under the impression that the date went really well..."

"Why?" Zell asked, his voice sounded incredulous. "She almost cried at least five times the entire night."

"It's not about last night though," Lina tried to explain. "It was about earlier in the day. When you and Irvine were yelling at each other. Afterwards, she turned to me and told me she thought you were talking about her." Zell made a face.

"I wasn't talking about her," was all Zell said, then got up from his seat, and stretched his arms out like he hadn't moved them in days. He took a couple swings at the air with his fists, then settled down into the soles of his feet. Lina couldn't help but giggle. "Alright! Time for grub!!" He jet out the door, leaving Lina to sit and read through more of her book. Then he poked his head back in through the doorway very quickly, and said, "Do not go anywhere, or Squall will cut my head off. And don't answer the door!" Then he left.

Lina smiled to herself, then settled back into reading her book. Her smiled didn't disappear though, and the words on the page suddenly didn't make sense to her. She looked down at her hands, then held her warm palms to her cheeks. She felt the smile still deep in her skin.

Why? No...how? How?—seemed to be the right question to ask. How in the world had she learned to smile at what Zell Dincht had to say to her? And how did this warm smile linger within her when other times alone, she simply felt...alone? She knew it'd take him at least twenty minutes to stand in line and order something to take back to the room, and that she should savor the time alone to think, but her thoughts were filled with his face. He'd taken the first step for the two of them, and she'd reciprocated.

And her smile only grew with these thoughts. She put her head down on the bed and closed her eyes. With every breath, his subtle scent from his sheets filled her nostrils. She began to fall asleep with his ringing laughter in her ears, his misty blue eyes, calm and caring in her mind. And she liked the warm feeling the thoughts left in her chest.

No preview yet, sorry!

Snowball effect will officially start... after this chapter. ;D be excited

I'd like to hear what you think. R/R!