A/N: Okay, this one just would not leave me alone for some reason.
MEMOS
Albus, have you been advising Gilderoy Lockhart on his choice of clothing?
Why do you ask?
He turned up to breakfast this morning wearing a retina-burningly bright orange monstrosity.
Oh, yes. I wore that one last Christmas but decided that the colour was not really for me. I invited Gilderoy over to my rooms. We sat in my rooms all evening and talked about fashion, while drinking butterbeer.
Please tell me you didn't put the moves on Lockhart?
I was joking.
So… was… I…
I believe you. Thousands wouldn't.
…
Why would you think that they were mine?
Well given the fact that they were almost as orange as his terrible new fake tan and your reputation for dazzling robes…
I never have done orange; it clashes with my hair.
Before it turned grey, you mean.
This conversation is over.
But you are grey! Grow old gracefully, Dumbles!
…
Dumbles?
…
Oldie…