A/N: Just going to insert a minor profanity warning here because Minerva is not a happy bunny (is she ever? Yep... I am going to die for that comment...). Anyway, another crazy idea from me to you! :)
MEMOS
Okay, okay. Your turn.
Bring it on.
Pomona, Filius, Minerva.
Snog Filius, marry Pomona, stupefy Minerva.
Oh, I see how it is, you bastard! Do your own paperwork from now on!
Minerva –
Don't you DARE 'Minerva' me!
But that is your name.
I think this is my cue to leave.
Stay right there, Severus. I will deal with you right after I have murdered Albus.
Gulp.
With all due respect, you cannot make me do anything.
Oh? Can't I? I could set the hinkypunks on you.
I concur. Please continue.
Ha! Severus, my boy, you must know she is lying?
Shut up, you! You have yet to explain yourself!
Sigh.
Do it!
Fine. I would snog Filius because he looks like the type to really know how to kiss a girl –
But you aren't a girl.
Details, details. Now are you going to let me finish or not?
Get on with it.
I would marry Pomona because she could bake me cookies every day of my life.
He has a point. Pomona's cookies are delicious.
Shut up, Severus!
…
And why would you stupefy me, Albus?
Because… erm…
…
Because I am intimidated by… your beauty…
You… what… I… oh, Albus you are so sweet.
Just don't go spreading it around.
…
Minerva?
…
Hello?
…
She's gone.
Nice save, old man.
I know. Right, it's your go. Poppy, Rubeus and Aurora.
A/N: Hi. Me again. I would just like to apologise for Severus's relative OOCness; I'm not really sure where it came from.