Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the characters.
A/N: This is a random visit from ghost Jiraiya. It's from Tsunade's point of view. This is my first time writing something like this. I hope you can follow it and I hope you enjoy it.
I'm in a meeting, a very important meeting with the other Kage and the Feudal Lords, when he appears before me and I really don't have time to deal with him. I've gotten used to him showing up while I'm working or while I'm trying to sleep, but as he appears across the crowded room, I know this meeting is going to be long.
As he appears, he's standing next to Yamato, who is acting as one of my bodyguards during this meeting. Jiraiya places his hand on Yamato's shoulder, but the wood-style user doesn't react…well, why would he? It's not like he can see Jiraiya…since he's a ghost. No one can see him…except for me.
Just block him out. That's all I have to do. Just ignore him. Damn it! Why does he have to be so distracting?
"Well, this meeting's a bore. Why are you even here? The war's over, what's the point of these meetings? Wouldn't you much rather be back in the village drinking sake? I know I would. I would do anything to get back to the village." He walks forward, away from Yamato, to stand beside me. He's doing this on purpose. I know he is, because he knows exactly how I will react when I see him. He wants me to make a scene in front of everyone. He wants to make them see how crazy I am. He's a bastard that way.
"Ya know, I can think of ten other things we could be doing other than sitting in this stupid meeting. What do ya say? Wanna join me?"
No, I can't let him touch me. I have to stop it! But how the hell am I going to stop a ghost when he's reaching out to me? I can't touch him. Damn it! Why does he have to run his hand up my arm? I still don't understand how he can touch me, but he can. His hand runs up my arm and my body jumps, startling everyone in the room.
"Lady Hokage? Are you alright?" The Mizukage asks.
She's worried that something is wrong. I can see it in her face. I can't say anything, I just have to nod my head and give a silent answer. He's still here, I know he is. I can feel him standing next to me. Ugh, why does he have to be so damn difficult? Why can't he just go and leave me alone?
"Always so quick to glare at people, you're the one that jumped, not me. Ya know, sometimes when you look at me like that, it makes me think that you hate me. But, that can't be true. You and I both know how you really feel about me."
I hate him and that stupid smile. Why does he have to be so annoying? Come on! Stop thinking about him and focus. I just have to focus on something other than him. The Tsuchikage's discussing a problem he has within his village. Damn it, I can't do it. I can feel him staring at me even though he's not really there. He just wants me to look at him. Well, I'm not going to do it.
Maybe if I ignore his presence and stop reacting to everything he does than he'll go away…yeah, right, like that will happen. He's just standing there to drive me insane. Oh great he's moving. Where the hell is he going?
"Psst…Tsunade, how old is this guy? Look at all these wrinkles! What is holding this man together?!" he asks, pointing down at the Tsuchikage.
Don't laugh. Just relax. Just block him out. He's not that interesting, just ignore him. Focus on what the old man is saying. Stop staring at his wrinkles and focus. Damn it, what the hell is he saying?
"Hey, are you going to answer me?"
Block him out, block him out! Focus, Tsunade, focus!
"Oh, I see, not in the talking mood today, huh? Well, that's disappointing. I was hoping to talk to you today. You know, maybe if you talked to me, I would go away and leave you alone…nah, that would be no fun." He's laughing. His laugh is so loud.
How do they not hear that? Oh, that's right…I'm the only crazy one in the room. Don't yell at him. How does he bring me to this every time? I shouldn't have to clench my fist this tight just to keep myself under control. Damn it, focus already! All I can hear is him. He's moving again. Great, now he's behind the Raikage. What is he saying? I can't hear him because that freaking idiot won't shut up! He's determined to keep my attention. I just know that's his goal.
"I wonder how this man got to be the Raikage. Well, then again, his father was the Third. It only makes sense that he takes over. It's just that…he's so…temperamental. Well, I guess that doesn't really matter since you're just as bad as him," he says.
Focus on anything but him. Damn him! Why does he have to do this now? Why can't he just leave me alone already? Oh, thank God! The ANBU are moving to stand behind their rightful Kage. Wait…he's not here! He's gone! Shit, where did he go? Maybe, he finally left…yeah, right, like that would ever happen. Is he really?...No, of course not.
"You really thought I would leave you to be alone in a boring meeting like this? Now what kind of friend would I be if I did that? Besides, I haven't gotten any answers from you yet. So-"
"Shut up!" Yelling at him does nothing. It never does. I'm just so mad that he's doing this. Why does he have to haunt me like this? Oh shit…I completely forgot everyone is in the room with me. Yup…they're all staring at me. Come on, think! What do I do? What do I do? Ahh, I have two guards right behind me that will take the blame. "You two, I'm trying to pay attention and your constant babbling is distracting, so shut up."
Yamato steps forward, "Lady Hokage, we…" he looks into my eyes and stops mid-sentence.
Is he serious right now!? He's going to talk back to me. How dare he?
He steps back into place. "We are deeply sorry, Lady Hokage."
"Thank you." Everyone is staring, but I don't think they've caught on to anything. "I'm sorry. Please, continue," I say.
Deep breaths, that's all I have to do. Just take deep breaths. I shouldn't get this worked over him. It's pathetic. He's just a figment of my imagination. There's no reason that I should…
"Nice cover. We wouldn't want anyone knowing that the Hokage is going crazy now, although, your ANBU might be catching on."
Ugh, I just knew it couldn't be that easy to get rid of him. I'm just going to have to put up with him until this meeting is over. Hopefully, then he will go away.
Why can't he just leave? He's been here the whole time! He has no reason to be here anymore. He's made several comments about everyone in the room, especially the Mizukage. Why is he back over by her? What could he possible say now that he hasn't already?
"Whoa, her tits are almost as big as yours! Ehhh, but she seems easy. Tsunade, do you think she's easy? Ehh, what do I care…a woman is a woman, and trust me, this right here is all woman!"
Just ignore him. Don't react. If I react then people with really think I'm crazy. I wish I could hit him, but he's a ghost. I just have to keep telling myself that. No matter how badly I don't want to believe it, I have to.
Finally the meeting is over! Will he go away? Of course not…he's going to follow me all the way back to the village. I just know he is.
"Well, that was the most pointless meeting I have ever sat through. What did you think?" he asks, walking beside me.
Just stay silent. I need to get back to the village. Then I can have a drink, and eventually, I will have too many and pass out. Then he will finally have to leave me alone.
That was the longest trip ever! But, I'm finally back in the village and in my office. Now, for my sake, Sakura will get me bottle after bottle. I love that she can't say no to me. It's great. She's such a good little apprentice. That's one way she's better than Shizune. Shizune always takes away my sake.
I love this stuff. It does wonders for my headache. The room is finally silent. I never realized how much I love the sound of silence. Well…I might as well, enjoy the silence while it lasts since it never lasts for very long anymore.
A/N: Like I said this was my first time writing something like this. I would love to know how what you thought of it. Cause if it's wrong I can fix it but if you like I can leave it the way it is. Just let me know. Thanks for reading!