Memos
Minerva, dearest, what is the time?
Remember what I told you; when the big hand is on the twelve –
I know how to tell the time, I just haven't anything with which to tell it.
It is a quarter past ten in the evening.
Is it really? Well, our intimate little session took a little longer than expected.
What did you expect? You can't just launch straight in, you've got to warm everything up first, otherwise you could do someone an injury.
That being said, my fingers are aching after going at it for so long.
Well, I was very satisfied with your efforts.
That's enough!
Filius?
I must insist that you cease this filth immediately!
Filth?
You have been sending these disgusting messages to your deputy, who is sitting in a crowded staffroom, where they are very easy to read. They made me want to burn my eyes out.
What on Earth are you talking about?
Your "intimate little session", "you can't just launch straight in", "warm everything up first", aching fingers from "going at it so long", "very satisfied"! You aren't exactly being discreet about it.
Oh my goodness.
Filius, I can't believe it.
You can't believe it? What am I supposed to think about this?
Filius, you utter fool.
I beg your pardon?
We weren't… you know.
What?
Minerva was teaching me how to knit.
She – she was?
Yes. Very definitely nothing else happened.
Oh.
Oh, Filius, you have made my day. In fact, you had me in stitches!
Was that a pun?
Why, yes it was. And a yarn good one at that!
This conversation is over.
But that one was a real purl!