I pace around the small hotel room that my father and I are staying in biting off every last bit of my thumb fingernail. My father sits on a chair in the corner of the room, staring at me with sad eyes.

"Will you please stop that?" he asks.

I stop in my tracks and look at him, tilting my head to the side in question but still biting on my fingernail, "Pacing like that, you're making me nervous." He says.

"Sorry." I say and shrug, but I continue to pace anyway.

I stayed by Austin's side until visiting hours were over and the nurse practically kicked me out. Now that I'm not a patient at the hospital, I'm not a loud to stick around after hours, and that completely sucks. So I went back to the hotel and now have to wait until the morning to be with Austin again, and I guess it's driving me insane.

"Are you hungry?" My father asks. I shake my head, even though my stomach would say otherwise.

"It's late and I'm pretty hungry, so I'm going to go down to this restaurant I saw at the end of the road, want me to order you something for later?" he asks, standing up.

"Any kind of soup they have." I say and he nods, knowing what I like. He grabs his car keys off of the bed stand and leaves.

I continue my pacing and my nail biting until I almost start to bleed. I sigh and sit down on my small uncomfortable twin bed and stare out the window. I bounce on the bed slightly, feeling old springs poking at me. I think the hospital bed was more comfortable than this one.

I start to feel guilty about not calling Trish. I was supposed to be home by now and reuniting with her, the least I could do is call. But I just don't have the mental ability right now. I love Trish and all, but I know her, and she will ask so many questions, and I just don't feel like answering any right now. And to be completely honest with myself, I'm afraid of going back home. I'm afraid of dealing with everything, like school and everyone in it.

I'm not the same person I was two months ago, and neither are the rest of us. I think school is just going to be, different. And there are a bunch of questions that keep going through my mind like, are the kids at school going to treat me differently? Are they going to act worse towards me, pity me, or just act like they always have? And the biggest question would be; did they even care that I was one of the missing? I know Trish did, of course she did, but I can't say I really had any other friends.

And I guess the thing that's bothering the most is, when Austin wakes up from this –which he will- how is he going to act towards me? Surely his popularity will go down when people figure out he even associates with me. I know that he cares about me, it's pretty obvious, but will going home change things? I shake my head and try to clear my thoughts; I can't bear to think about something like that right now. I must think of the positive things.

My father comes back a little while later with chicken and dumpling soup, my favorite and I totally forgot that I told him I wasn't even hungry. I sit cross legged on my bed, soup in hand and listen to my father tell me stories about his trip here, through bites of his own food.

After we're done eating, I decide to go to bed to stop myself from pacing again. I figured my father would appreciate that. I climb into bed, feeling mentally exhausted. I start to fall asleep fast. I think it's because I know that when I wake up, I'll be able to go and see Austin's angelic sleeping face, and hope that it's his time to wake up.

My alarm clock next to my bed wakes me up, which I set for exactly ten minutes before visiting hours at the hospital. I throw some clothes on, brush my hair, grab my bag and jog over to the hospital. My father was still asleep but he knows where I was going to be going, I doubt he will even worry.

I make my way through the hospital casually. I don't have to go up to the front desk, or explain to anyone why I'm here, because they all know. They all pretty much know and like me. I mean I was just a patient a couple days ago. It's sort of odd to think about. I mean, it's just a hospital in New Mexico, and they are just staff members doing their jobs but it feels like the best place to be right now. But maybes that's just because I was so used to being at the plane crash site that, any place that isn't there, makes me feel better.

As I walk through the main hallway, pass the cafeteria, I hear some commotion. I stop and look into the doorway, and see a man and a woman, standing in front of one of the doctors. The woman is crying hysterically, and the man is shaking his head in what looks like disgust. I can't help but eavesdrop.

"No, she can't be…" The man says, trying to keep a steady voice.

"I'm sorry, she died during the crash. We have her… You can identify her for yourselves if you want." The doctor says in a sad voice.

"Not my baby girl." The woman says loudly and starts sobbing hard again.

The doctor's pager goes off. He takes it off of his side and looks at it, and then back at the couple, "I'm sure Stacy was a lovely girl, I'm so sorry for your loss." He says. The man nods in understanding and the doctor walks off.

My eyes widen; this is Stacy's parents. They are just finding out about this? They must have just flown in. Were they really not notified that she was dead before they arrived? That just seems so cruel; to make them fly in with the hope she may be alive.

My bag suddenly feels heavier than usual. I haven't looked in it since a couple weeks ago. I unzip it and look in, and see Stacy's journal. I completely forgot that I even had it, and the remembrance couldn't have come at a better time. I take a deep breath, and walk into the cafeteria.

Stacy's mother has gotten a little under control, her sobbing is less hysterical, but still there. No one at the tables around us stare at her, I guess they are used to things like this happening here, which is understandable. Stacy's father notices me approaching, and keeps his eyes on me.

I stand in front of them, and clear my throat before speaking. I realize I don't really know what I was planning on saying, but it just comes to me, "Hello. I'm Ally Dawson, I was on the plane with your daughter, and I went to school with her. I know how terrible this is for you, and I'm so sorry for your loss. But I have this, and I think you'd really love to have it." I say.

I hand the book to her father, because I don't think her mother could really handle it right now, though she is watching me hesitantly. He takes the book in his hands and studies it for a moment. He then opens it up and his eyes brighten just a bit when he realizes what it is. He looks at me then and gives me the tiniest of smiles, "Thank you so much for keeping this, it means a lot." He says.

The mother looks at it, and nods in agreement. I nod my head and turn around, and walk away. I know I didn't know Stacy that well, but this tugs at my heart strings pretty bad, and I wipe away a tear as I step out of the cafeteria room.

I walk over slowly to Austin's room, not being able to get over what just happened. It's like everything that went terribly wrong from the plane crash on is replaying in my head, and I can't shake it off. I make it to Austin's room, and there are people standing around his bed. He is completely surrounded and I can't see him. They are all talking, laughing, and acting happy. I stand at the doorway and stare like some stalker.

The people around him are his parents, two doctors, and two other blondes, must be other relatives. His mother turns and notices me, and smiles big, "Ally!" She says and runs over. She hugs me tightly and I stare over her shoulder at a sitting up Austin, whose eyes are on me.