Be warned. Pure silliness ahead.
I was thinking that Jack sending Gwen to protect Ianto's family in CoE wasn't solely in honor of Ianto, which is kind of serious thinking, and I don't quite know how it turned into...this….
Hope you enjoy anyway.

The kids were settled down with a DVD and kettle was just boiling. Which of course created the perfect moment for the bloody phone to ring.

Rhiannon sighed with irritation and reached for the handset, slightly mollified by the number on the display. She couldn't blame Susan for wanting to check how her son was coping with his first sleepover.

Rhiannon propped the phone between ear and shoulder while she finished making her cuppa. If she knew Susan, and she did, this wasn't going to be a short chat.

"Hi Luv, he's doing well," Rhiannon said, pre-empting the inevitable stream of questions. "Done all his homework, helped my lot with theirs, and now they're all watching …um Cars I think. That one with the red…."

"Bloody Hell, Rhi, will you listen? I haven't got long. Dafydd's just popped out for a smoke between entrée and main…"

Hearing the oh-so-prim Susan swear was more than enough to focus Rhiannon's attention. "Sorry, love," Rhiannon said, as apologetically as one can while juggling a phone and a scalding cup of tea. "I'm listening now." And within seconds she was. The tea rested forgotten on the counter.

"My Ianto?" Rhiannon felt her voice switch from a drawl to a squeak. "He's on a date! Oh, that's lovely."

And it was lovely. Lovely enough to have her eyes misting. Lovely enough to bring the sour taste of regret to mingle with the tears burning at the back of her throat. Rhiannon's concentration drifted again as Susan rattled on in the background of her memories.

Her little brother was dating again. Moving on with his life, finally, just when Rhiannon was starting to believe he'd pine for his Lisa forever. Ianto had become been so withdrawn since he'd lost Lisa in that terrorist attack. Hardly ever called, only visited when he ran out of excuses to stay away. Rhiannon had tried to be there for him, she really had, but they'd grown apart since Dad died. The gulf between Daddy's Little Girl and the son who never quite measured up was hard to bridge, especially when Ianto didn't seem willing to meet her half way.

Rhiannon knew deep inside it was partly her own fault. She'd accepted his excuses too easily, believed him when he said he was managing. She could have made more effort. She'd promised Mam to always look after her little brother, but she'd told herself he was long grown up, and Johnny and kids took up so much of her energy. Sometimes it felt like too much effort even to lift the phone, particularly when she knew that more often than not it'd be the machine that answered. Still, she had tried, and she couldn't help feeling hurt that Ianto hadn't told her he was getting serious about someone. And it had to be serious if Ianto was treating her to that French place near the memorial Susan had been nagging Dafydd about for months.

The chatter died to silence as Susan paused, obviously waiting for a reaction. Rhiannon hastily consulted her memory.

"He's what?"

-XXX-

Susan smiled her satisfaction into her phone. She had Rhiannon's attention now, good and proper. "Yes, Rhi, I'm sure. No woman's getting her feet under that table, I can tell you. No, truly, I'm not imagining. He's just taken a taste off the other bloke's fork for goodness sake. No, love, while he was still holding it." Susan giggled. "It explains why Ianto never called our Rebecca after last Christmas. Terribly disappointed she was, but you can't expect him to explain that over turkey and crackers with the neighbors, now can you?"

Susan paused to listen to the gratifying stream of words from the other end of the phone.

"Oh, he's gorgeous, Rhi, like a model or a movie star. Young Ianto always had good taste; I'll say that for him. Yeah, sure, I'll send you a photo now. Call me back when you get it."

Susan leaned back in her chair, trying to look casual as she angled her phone towards Ianto's table. The men moved as the shutter clicked, but it was quite an illuminating shot, so she sent it anyway. She was just trying for another when the phone rang.

"Susan, what the hell are you playing at? I wanted to see the bloke's face. This is the back of Ianto's head!"

Susan smiled angelically. "The two were sharing the same airspace, sweetheart."

The silence on the other end of the line was immensely satisfying. Susan didn't really want to hang up yet, but a waft of cool air signaled the opening of the balcony door, and she straightened quickly as her husband loomed in the opening.

"Listen, Rhi, I've got to go. Dafydd's coming back. I'll send you a better shot as soon as I can, OK?"

While Dafydd lowered his bulk into his chair, Susan risked a quick shot over his shoulder. Much better. She sent the photo and smiled happily at her husband. This really was a brilliant evening, and mains hadn't even arrived yet.

-XXX-

Jack stomped across the Plass, hoping a walk would help him work off his irritation. Sweat beaded along his collar, making him wish he'd left the coat behind. Trust Cardiff to turn on a sunny day just when he was he in the mood for brooding. Brooding alone, and not by choice.

Jack paused to swap the paper package from one arm to the other. He wasn't hungry anymore. Might as well throw it away. Fish and chips by the bay lost their appeal without someone to share them with.

He'd bought grilled fish, too. Jack preferred battered, but he'd chosen grilled because Ianto liked it. After which he'd swooped into the tourism office with what might have been a fatuous smile splitting his face, to steal his lover away for lunch in the rare burst of Cardiff sunshine.

But Ianto already had lunch plans. Ianto had lunch plans which didn't involve Jack.

It was totally unfair for the man to worm his way this far under Jack's skin and then make a lunch date with someone else.

It was almost enough to make a man rethink the whole anti-monogamy thing.

Lost in thought, Jack collided with a woman strolling in the other direction. He mumbled apologies while his eyes did their usual head-to-toe appraisal. Not even a hot young thing he could distract himself with. She wasn't bad looking, but Jack wasn't into the motherly type.

Jack wasn't used to having the motherly type appraise him as though he'd come in on the sole of her shoe, either.

"Can I help you?" Jack asked, fairly politely, given his mood. He wouldn't even have made that much of an effort, except that he'd just come out of the tourism office, and they couldn't risk someone complaining again. Not after what happened the last time Owen filled in while Ianto was having a well-earned day off.

The woman peered up into Jack's face, and then nodded. Her mouth set into a determined line, which reminded Jack of something – or someone.

"You can, at that," she said decisively. "You can help me work out what the hell you're doing with my brother."

-XXX-

"Ianto's sister," Jack repeated. This was awkward, but somehow not as much as it ought to be. Once he'd finished spluttering, it'd felt quite natural to settle here, on the bench he often shared with Ianto, with the bundle of fish and chips between them.

"I didn't know….. I mean, he hasn't….ah…." OK, maybe it was awkward.

"He's never mentioned me?" Rhiannon supplied. Jack nodded, somewhat uneasily. Yep, awkward.

"I'm not surprised, I suppose." Rhiannon confided. "I've not always looked out for him as I should have." Jack tactfully didn't mention the sudden shine in her eyes.

"But that doesn't mean I can't start, does it? Only," Rhiannon paused, trying to express her feelings through the circling motions of her hands. "Only, he'd probably think I was interfering, if he knew I was….um…."

"Sussing me out?" Jack supplied, favoring Ianto's sister with his trademark grin, in the hopes it would work as well on her as it did on her sibling.

"Well, yeah," Rhiannon agreed, casually stealing a chip. "Hmm, not bad. So, don't tell him I was here, OK? I'd rather wait until he's ready to tell me about you himself, if that's all right."

Jack nodded. He didn't fancy keep another secret from Ianto, but he didn't fancy crossing his sister either. And Ianto obviously wasn't ready for Jack to meet his family yet. Or maybe, Jack thought uneasily, maybe he'd given Ianto the impression he didn't do family stuff. Not that he did, usually. But since he'd already met her…Well, he could work on that. Regardless, it was better to let it happen when Ianto was ready. Or at least let him believe that. Jack ate some fish and tried to get his mind back into order.

"So do I pass muster?" Jack asked eventually.

Rhiannon chuckled. "Haven't decided yet whether he's been blinded by a pretty face."

Jack's laughter scared the lurking seagulls into flight.

"Not that he's the type for that," Rhiannon continued. "Or," she corrected herself, with a definite note of sadness, "He didn't used to be."

Jack sobered. "He sees past my face better than anyone I've ever known, and believe me, that's saying something."

Rhiannon examined him intently for a moment, mind obviously working behind brown eyes suddenly as enigmatic as her brother's. Jack found himself twitching. He wanted this woman's approval desperately, and he had no idea why it mattered so much. OK, maybe he did, but he didn't want to admit it.

Inspection concluded, Rhiannon nodded briskly. "If he's putting in that sort of effort, Captain Harkness, you might be worth his while, after all."

As benedictions go, it wasn't much of one, but Jack's mood improved considerably anyway. They exchanged grins, argued over the same chip, and basked companionably in the sun, sharing the atmosphere of a mission accomplished.

"So it's you he's meeting today, is it?" Jack asked, carefully casual.

Rhiannon stole another chip and squinted up at him. "If I said No, would you be jealous?"

"I'm not the jealous type," Jack hedged, eyes fixed firmly on the horizon.

Rhiannon laughed. "Of course not." She tilted her face up to the sun, trying not to smile too hard. "No need for that, with a face like yours. You could pull half a dozen handsome Welsh lads, no worries."

Jack broke the ensuing silence by tossing a handful of chips at the encroaching seagulls. Rhiannon used the cover of the resultant feathered free-for-all to inspect him carefully out of the corner of her eye, the way she did when she didn't want the kids to know she was watching them. Having concluded he'd crack in his own good time, she leaned back against the bench and enjoyed the sunshine. The technique never failed to extract a confession from David when he'd broken something; it'd work fine with this overgrown kid her brother had taken on. Ianto always had a thing for mending broken wings, even as a boy. A passion they'd shared, back before Tad decided nurturing was girls' stuff.

"I don't want a dozen others," Jack admitted finally.

Rhiannon patted his hand. She tried to keep her smile approving rather than triumphant, but it was a wasted effort. Some smirks couldn't be contained.

"I won't eat any more of your chips," she announced, after a suitable pause. "Don't want to ruin my lunch."

"Because Ianto will be upset if you don't eat with him?" Jack said hopefully.

"And he'll treat me to something a bit more fancy than chips," Rhiannon agreed.

Jack really was handsome, especially when he smiled like that.

-XXX-

Jack found himself fighting the impulse to take Rhiannon's hand as they strolled back towards the Hub. She looked absolutely nothing like her brother, but somehow this woman exuded the same air of ….. whatever the hell it was that made Jack drop his barriers whenever he stopped concentrating on holding them in place.

Jack halted in the shadow of the water tower. "It's probably better if I go in through another entrance," he explained, annoyed by the way his feet shuffled.

"It was nice meeting you," Rhiannon said politely, extending a hand. Jack was sure she was rolling her eyes, but he couldn't tell for sure, given the decorous tilt of her head.

Jack took the offered hand and squeezed it within his own. Now he was resisting the urge to plant a - oh hell, it was definitely brotherly, and wasn't that a daunting concept? – kiss on her cheek.

"You too," he said warmly.

Rhiannon smiled her brother's smile at him. Jack felt something break, and mend. Acceptance was a heady drug.

"I hope it won't be long before we can meet properly," Jack blurted, through the crack in his composure. He wasn't sure if it was worse that he sounded needy, or that he didn't care how needy he sounded.

"So do I," Rhiannon agreed solemnly. She stretched up on her tiptoes, and Jack's cheek warmed from the press of her lips against it. Surely he couldn't be blushing?

Rhiannon chuckled as she drew away. "But I'll know what to do to you if you hurt him," she said. "Been trained for it and all. So watch yourself, if you value your valuables."

Jack frowned at the departing figure. "Threats should make more sense than that," he called after her.

Rhiannon stopped and backtracked far enough to be heard without shouting. Her eyes held a twinkle that Jack knew well, except he was used to seeing it in blue.

"If you'd ever talked to my brother about his family, you'd already know," she said reprovingly. "Do your homework, Jack Harkness. Find out what sort of payback you'll get if you cross me."

-XXX-

Jack draped himself over the arm of the couch and watched as Ianto repaired yet another tear in the long-suffering greatcoat.

"I didn't realize you've been fixing it yourself," Jack commented, half-mesmerized by the flashing needle.

Ianto looked up and shrugged. "Tad taught me," he explained, before dropping his eyes back to his task.

Jack's ears pricked up. Here was the opening he needed to answer Rhiannon's parting challenge.

"Breeding his own team of tailors, was he?" Jack asked, trying for casual.

The needle stopped with a jerk. Ianto swore softly at the effect on the fraying threads. Jack tensed, afraid he'd touched a nerve, then relaxed as Ianto chuckled softly.

"He tried," Ianto agreed. "I didn't mind, but my sister hated every minute. Well, until she found a use for it. Nothing like what Tad expected, though."

And with that, Ianto returned to the sewing.

Jack shifted impatiently. "Go on then," he urged. "Tell me the rest."

Ianto looked up again, and was surprised and slightly flattered to have Jack's undivided attention.

"She worked for an animal refuge," he explained. "Taking in strays and such. The vets all used to request her as their assistant because she was so neat sewing up the wounds." Ianto paused to chuckle again. "Terror of the tom cats, they called her."

Jack blinked. "How does one terrify a tom cat?"

Ianto fidgeted, crossing and uncrossing his legs, which would have distracted Jack completely except for the delightful blush which accompanied the fidgeting.

"She used to brag that the vets got through four castrations an hour, with her help," Ianto explained quickly, crossing his legs again. Jack gulped and found himself copying the action.

It didn't even help to know that they'd grow back. At least, he assumed they would. Maybe he'd have to die first? Which in this case would be worth it.

"Sounds like your sister's nearly as dangerous as you are," Jack said weakly. He'd written her off as the motherly type, which proved the folly of relying on first impressions. Mother bear; perhaps, and there was nothing more fearsome.

It was a good thing Jack had no intentions of harming her cub.

Ianto nodded and winced. "Probably more so. And really, Jack, it's not any better remembering than it was hearing her talk about it, so can we change the subject now? Although," and Ianto's voice changed completely. "We might want to spend some time appreciating….ah…what we've got…." And there was that blush again.

"In honor of all the cats that don't," Jack agreed. He didn't wait for a further invitation. It wasn't wise to cross a Jones, and he'd be all the safer if Ianto valued his valuables too.

See, really silly! Fun though, at least I hope so. Thank you for reading.