**Author's notes…So I started this as a one shot for Morelli's birthday. It was originally going to be a fluffy Cupcake story, but it had morphed into something else as I wrote it. Something NOT Cupcake friendly at all. Anyway, it's now going to be a three chapter story, I figured everyone needed a little birthday surprise of their own.
Thanks to Margaret for pushing me to explain what happens to all the cops after Steph caught them, what happened to Morelli after he messed up, big time, and most importantly did Ranger and Steph get a HEA?
I will update with the last chapter on Steph's birthday in October. So let me know what you think and hope this helped answer some questions.
No spoilers for the books, warnings for dirty language and actions (perhaps a hint of smut here), and a disclaimer that all this belongs to JE. Hope you enjoy.**
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Ranger's Birthday Cake
August 12th
Joe Morelli never thought living with someone would be so stressful. But it was. It was driving him nuts. Driving him to eat, a lot. He got out of his SUV and grabbed the waist of his jeans and gave a little jump as he tugged them up under his now protruding gut. He had to start watching what he ate. Tomorrow.
He stared at the front door of the Tasty Pastry and his mouth watered. He really, really needed a dozen doughnuts. Badly. Yes, the diet would wait until tomorrow. With determined steps he made his way to the front door and grabbed the handle just as the door pushed open from the other side. He was suddenly standing face to face with Stephanie Plum, the reason he needed the doughnuts in the first place.
"Plum," he said with a small smile.
"Morelli," she hissed back.
Okay, so she wasn't happy to see him. They weren't exactly friends anymore. Shit. They weren't even speaking anymore. But she had just spoken to him. Hope filled him. "How are you, Cupcake?"
Her eyes narrowed and she took a deep breath. "I'm good. But I'm in a hurry, if you'll excuse me, please?" she asked politely.
Huh? She didn't yell at him, kick him, or smash the cake she was holding into his face. Maybe she really was starting to thaw a little. He smiled and pulled the door open for her, allowing her and her cake to make their way through the entrance. "You need help with that cake?" he asked, giving her his best smoldering smile.
She rolled her eyes. "You had your chance for cake, Morelli. You blew it."
Shit. He knew she was referring to more than just the birthday cake she'd gotten him five months ago. The one he'd never gotten to eat because he was an idiot. He glanced down at the frosted confection, visible through the plastic window in the box. Happy Birthday, Carlos. Oh, fuck, no. "I thought you weren't speaking to him either."
She shrugged. "I wasn't." That was it, no explanation or anything? He opened his mouth, trying to decide how to ask about the cake, but she shut him up. "Goodbye, Morelli."
He watched her walk away. God did she look good going. He had no idea what he had been thinking the night of his birthday. He guessed the saying was true, you really didn't know what you had until it was gone. Losing Stephanie was the worst thing he'd ever had to go through. And he'd gone through a lot since she left him.
He knew she was pissed about seeing him on stage with the stripper that night, but he didn't chase after her or try to explain himself that night like he should have. Nope. He'd been wrapped up in the moment. It was something new and exciting and so damn hot, he wanted it. He hadn't been with anyone but Steph in years. At the time it hadn't bothered him, but after that encounter on stage he got to thinking. All about how the excitement and spontaneity that they'd had early on in their relationship had diminished over the years.
It wasn't as if they didn't have sex. It was just that it wasn't anything special. They slept in the same bed every night and he knew if she wanted sex or not by whether or not she wore her panties to bed. More nights than not she didn't wear them. So why had he been so ready to go home with that other woman?
He sighed to himself. It was because he hadn't felt that turned on in a long time. Stephanie was sexy and beautiful, but somewhere between him sharing a bathroom with her tampons and her washing his dirty underwear, all the magic had disappeared. Hell, he'd gotten to the point that he used a vibrator to get her off so he wouldn't have to put much time into it. There was just no connection between them anymore. It was just a way to get himself off.
He had wanted to explore the sexy, exciting feelings he had for Christine, not go home and fight with Stephanie. So he did. He went outside and waited by her car and brought her back to his house, to the bed he normally shared with Stephanie, and he fucked her, repeatedly.
All the old Morelli magic was back and he was in cloud nine. Everything outside that room left his mind. His only concern was making that woman come as many times as he could. By the time the sun was rising they were just collapsing into a heap to sleep. His bed was totally ruined by sopping puddles he'd caused her to make and he didn't give a shit if he had to lay in it. He was Joe Morelli again.
That feeling was short lived. Two hours later Steph came over to talk to him and found him in bed, naked, with the other woman riding his cock. For the second time that day she looked at him with icy anger and walked away without a fight.
No, the fight came two weeks later. He tried to talk to her, explain himself, every day between the morning she walked out and the morning he caught her going to church with her family. Yes. Church! Even he couldn't believe it, but he did what he had to. He got dressed up and took his Mom and Grandma to church with him. He figured that she couldn't ignore him in church.
What he found when he got there was Stephanie, not just sitting with her mother and grandmother like he expected, but she was with the wives. All three of them! Her cousin Shirley Gazzara was between Big Dog's wife Becky and Costanza's wife Toni. He was about to approach when Gazzara grabbed his arm. "For God's sake don't make eye contact."
He didn't know what the hell was going on. "What?"
He was pulled into the pew with the other guys, who looked like shit. "Stephanie told them everything. Shirley isn't talking to me. Carl's sleeping in his car and Big Dog's in the basement. I guess I should be happy I got the couch."
Shit. Joe was happy he had his own house. When he said that out loud, Carl begged him for the use of his spare bedroom, which he'd given, thinking it'd only be a few days. Now, five months later, Carl was his unofficial roommate and he couldn't get rid of him. Which was why he needed the doughnuts. He was stressed.
His mother stopped baking for him that day too. After Stephanie announced to the entire congregation that she was requesting that they all say extra prayers for him and the other men, who had been led astray by strippers working on the devil's behalf. Yeah. The burg loved that.
An hour later the rumor had spread that he had caught some sort of VD that would make his pecker fall off if God didn't intervene. And Steph came out smelling like a rose. She was the good woman asking for God's help to save the soul of the man she loved. The thing was, since his dick was liable to fall off, no one expected her to stay with him. It was bullshit. He was out a girlfriend and now every other woman in the neighborhood looked at him like he was a leper.
He was pissed. He charged over to her apartment and was met with the barrel of a shotgun, which she had leveled at his nose. She was fucking crazy. She trashed his life and was threatening to kill him, just because he fucked another woman. So he blew up and told her just what he thought about her, their boring sex life, and her behavior. Her answer was to cock the gun.
He hadn't talked to her since, but he was on the receiving end of her death glare dozens of times. They couldn't seem to avoid one another. She was at the station, and Pino's, and the bakery. And the more he saw her the more he missed her. He'd gotten caught up in thinking about the boring sex routine, but he didn't stop to think beyond that, to all the good things. Like coming home to her at the end of a really bad day and having her kiss away his wariness. Or waking up with her and having her kiss him goodbye and make him promise to be safe. Or just talking to her about their days over subs as they cuddled in front of the TV. He had what everyone wanted, someone to love him. And he threw it away for a one night stand. Maybe he deserved to be alone. She deserved better than that, better than him.
But he sure as hell knew, Manoso wasn't that. This was all that SOB's fault and he wasn't going to let him win the girl. No fucking way.
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Stephanie picked up her messenger bag and frowned. She shook her head at herself and wondered if she had the guts to actually go through with this. It was a life changing move. Heck, it was probably a life threatening move too. But did she care? Not really. It'd taken her the better part of five months to figure out what she wanted. Now she had to act on it.
To say the last five months had changed her would be an understatement. When she saw the man she'd been dating for seven years up on stage, making out with a stripper, she felt like she lost her mind a little. She had been so upset about the blow to her ego, that she nearly made a huge mistake. She almost slept with another man, one that she soon discovered orchestrated the entire event. And then she did the only thing she could do. She tore them both down.
She thought she and Joe Morelli had been in a good place before that night. She was convinced they'd been on the road to marriage. They were committed, for once, and were spending a lot of time together. They were even half moved in with one another. It was the most domestic she'd ever been. And it was exactly what he wanted, she was growing up. So she couldn't figure out why he would go after some girl that was fifteen years younger than her. Or why every man she got involved with cheated with some disgusting skank. It was really eating her up inside. Especially since she wasn't sure she'd ever be enough woman to hold onto any man.
All those things were going through her head when Ranger Manoso showed up in the parking lot that night. Warning alarms should have sounded when he popped out of nowhere, but she was just so glad to see him that she didn't give a shit why he was really there. The way he looked at her, the way he made her feel, she needed it. She needed to feel desired and Ranger always delivered on that.
Over the years they had slipped in and out of one another's beds here and there. Never anything serious, just the most amazing love making that anyone could possibly experience. But those few times with him had never been enough for her. It was like getting an appetizer when you were starving. She wanted more. So much more. She wanted it all from Ranger…love, a commitment, and a promise of forever. But he told her he could only give her sex. He couldn't or wouldn't give her the rest.
She wanted to agree to his terms. She wanted to be okay with what he could give, but she couldn't do it. She knew it'd never be enough of him. She couldn't risk being hurt when it ended. So she'd been the good girl. She chose the man that could give her a relationship over the one that could give her orgasms.
But that night she threw caution out the window. She was ready for a hot, dirty, no-strings night in the arms of her magical lover. He drove them back to his apartment completely aware of why she was in that car with him. Once they were inside his apartment he kissed her and it was hot and steamy and everything a kiss from him always was, perfect.
They had pulled each other's clothes off in a frenzy before falling into his bed naked. She found herself underneath him. His mouth was on her and in mere minutes he proved why he was indeed still the wizard. Her body was wet and ready. She needed him inside of her and was begging for it. He was hard and ready, perched above her, pushing at her entrance and then he got the weirdest look on his face.
He rolled off of her and laid on his back, staring up at his ceiling. She didn't know what was happening. She practically begged him to fuck her, but he just shook his head. Then he said it, "I paid that girl to bring Morelli on stage, Stephanie." She wasn't sure what to think. When she asked him why, he just said he was messing with him. He hadn't planned on things getting that out of control.
But she read between the lines. He'd planned on fucking up her relationship enough that she'd run to him for sex. Just like she had. She had been so angry with him. How couldn't she have been? He helped hurt her. But it hurt worse that he was going to use her that way.
She didn't give him a chance to explain. She got dressed and walked out on him. One of his guys drove her home for her car. Then she went over to Morelli's to talk to him. They had things to discuss. But he wasn't alone. He was in his bed with the stripper. She had him cuffed to the bed and was riding him hard. It was exactly like finding her ex-husband being rode by Joyce Barnhardt all those years ago. She wanted to die.
She went home and cried herself to sleep, then the next afternoon she got up and decided to get on with her life. She couldn't rot away just because the men she loved treated her like she was nothing better than garbage. She didn't take their calls. She avoided them. She was done. They just didn't seem to understand that.
Morelli tried to talk to her. He tried to explain himself, but there is no forgiving what he did to her. Cheating was a nonnegotiable, so she wouldn't even speak to him. When he followed her to church a couple weeks later she had enough. She stood up and humiliated him in from of the entire burg. She told them all that he caught a disease from the stripper, which could have been true. She did notice a weird cold sore on his lip a couple months ago.
She also thought the other cops wives should know exactly what the four of them had done. They'd been livid. Shirley had kicked Eddie onto the couch for a month before forgiving him. His permanent punishment was watching the kids once a week while they had a girl's night out. Big Dog fared much the same with his wife, but Carl's wife had enough. She knew his entire paycheck went to the titty bar. She warned him to stop, but he refused time and again. She finally had enough, she filed for divorce. Carl was living with Joe now, and they both looked the worse for wear because of it.
After that Joe stopped bothering her. He avoided her and didn't speak when they accidently met somewhere. It gave her time to think about what she really wanted from life. It also gave her time to think about the silent and invisible Ranger.
Unlike Joe, Ranger didn't call or stop or follow her around, not while she was home or awake anyway. No, she just woke to a dozen roses, twice a week for the last five months. Each just had a simple note that said, I'm sorry. Nothing more and nothing less, just, I'm sorry. Not even when she went to RangeMan and dumped all her trackers onto the reception desk, with a note asking that he not bother with her anymore, had he shown up to see her. She just woke in the morning to find one simple tracker lying next to her fully loaded gun, a charged stun gun, and a small fire extinguisher. The note that time had said, Please carry a tracker. I need to know you're safe.
It's not like she didn't see him, or at least traces of him, around. When her car blew up, she saw his car arrive on the scene, but he never approached her. He just checked and left, of course he'd had one of his guys stick around to give her a ride, but it wasn't the same. When she was working on something she couldn't figure out or looking for someone she couldn't find, she's wake up to find an address or a name on the counter, with no other explanation.
It was frustrating and infuriating. Not because he was still there, popping into her life like always, but because she missed his physical presents. She missed him being pushy and overprotective when she was being unreasonable. She missed his smirks. She missed his Ranger-humor and the way he could make anything sound dirty. She missed the way he held her in his arms when he wanted to know she was safe. She missed the way he kissed her to let her know he would miss her. She missed the way he said the word, Babe, to mean about anything. She just missed him. All of him.
So two weeks ago, when Tank pulled her out of a burning building and she saw him wave to the Porsche parked across the street, before it disappeared, she had to know what was going on. She demanded that Tank tell her why Ranger was avoiding her. Why he was still taking care of her if he didn't care enough to speak to her.
Tank shook his head and said, "Took you long enough to ask." She didn't understand what that meant, but he continued. "The man knows he fucked up, but he clearly loves you, Steph. He can't let you go if there is hope and there's still hope if he doesn't hear you tell him there isn't." He'd been avoiding her so she couldn't push him away for good? Then Tank said, "Do him a favor and figure your shit out. You need to either forgive him or cut him loose. This is hurting him too much to keep it going this way."
She'd been floored by that. She'd also thought about it for the last two weeks. All she could think about were the wonderful things he'd done for her over the years. The way he still took care of her, even though she'd walked out on him. And certainly the way she missed him. There was no denying herself anymore. She loved him. So there was only one conclusion she could come to. She had to see him, make it clear what she wanted, and put the ball back into his court.
That's what she was doing right now.
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Ranger looked up when he heard his office door open. He saw the one thing he never expected to see again. Stephanie Plum, dressed in a light blue, lacy dress. It was short and sleeveless and belted tightly around her waist, showing off her arms and legs and all the delicious curves in between. Wow.
She smiled and lifted the bakery box in front of herself. "Happy Birthday," she said sweetly.
He stood and smiled back. It seemed too good to be true. He didn't know if he should trust the overwhelming feeling that she was forgiving him or not. "You got me cake?"
She shrugged. "Peace offering," she said with a sweet smile. "Plus, I figured if you wouldn't join me and I'd get to eat the entire thing. Win-win."
It was like all those months apart evaporated just like that. She was back. "Babe."
"Do you want a piece?" she offered, even though her entire face lit up when he called her Babe.
"Let's go upstairs. I have plates and forks."
She grinned. "How civilized."
He grinned back, imagining her eating it with her fingers. God, how he had missed her. Her quick wit and sharp tongue, her caring nature and her fierce temper, her sweetness and her stubbornness, her determination and her brilliant mind, her smile, her voice, her scent, her kisses, her sexy curls, her body against his, all of it, all of her. He knew he loved her before, but once she was gone he realized what he was missing. He realized he couldn't let her go.
They walked into his apartment and he noticed her stiffen slightly. They hadn't been here together since the night she walked out on him. The night he fucked up everything. No, he didn't regret telling her the truth. It would have been so much worse he had slept with her before his confession and not confessing at all hadn't been an option. He couldn't keep that from her. It'd hurt them both if she ever found out from someone else.
He put a hand on the small of her back and felt a zing of electricity shoot up his arm. He shook his head. How could he have denied that they belonged together so long? He'd never had a connection like that to anyone else and he knew he never would again. His Babe was it for him.
She placed the cake on the counter and smiled at him. He turned to grab the plates and he felt the jolt surge through him. No way.
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"I can't believe you did this. What the fuck did you use on him?" Tank snarled as he lifted Ranger in his arms and carried him into the bedroom.
She held up the stun gun Ranger had given her. "He said it'd drop an elephant. I figured we'd have a couple minutes to get him restrained."
"Tell me again what the fuck you were thinking?"
"I wanted to get him into a position that he wouldn't have the upper hand in," she told him as she pulled out the cuffs and rope and ties she had stashed into her handbag with her stun gun.
Tank dropped Ranger onto the bed and took the rope. "You realize, if you wanted to do some kinky dom shit with him he'd be all about it, right?" he asked. "You didn't need to zap him and tie him up like this."
She rolled her eyes. "I want to make him listen to me, that's all." Though looking at him like that, was kind of appealing. She could just imagine the things she could do to a helpless Ranger. Hmm.
"Right," Tank grumbled as he tied off the ropes that attached his wrists to the bed. "You two are fucking crazy. Most people just talk about their feelings without assaulting one another."
"We're not most people. Now get out before he wakes up," she said, waving him out of the apartment. "And Tank, thank you."
"Don't you ever fucking mention it," he ordered.
She smiled and finger waved as he left her alone with her sleeping beauty. He'd come around in a second, she was sure. She sat on the edge of the bed and waited.
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His head hurt like a bitch. Christ. He tried to move and couldn't. What the fuck? He opened his eyes, ready to fight and found himself on his bed, face to face with Stephanie. "Hi," she whispered. "Sorry about this, but I had to be sure that you would hear me out."
He didn't know what was happening. Was she still pissed at him? Was this some revenge scheme? What was she planning to do to him? "Why did you tie me up?" he asked.
"Because I couldn't let you touch me or kiss me or distract me like you can," she complained. "I just want you to lay there, quietly, and listen to me. Can you do that?"
Fuck. That was kind of sexy. "Yes," he answered obediently. He figured it was the least he could do, besides, if he were honest, maybe they could explore this role reversal a little more.
"Thank you," she whispered, before kissing his forehead. "Why didn't you come talk to me since that night?"
"I knew you needed time to deal with everything."
She scrunched up her nose like she was trying to figure something out. "Why the flowers?"
He smiled, the flowers were because he's completely in love with her. "I didn't want you to forget about me."
She blushed then. "You knew I'd never forget you." Ranger gave himself a mental high-five, score one for the man. "What about the work clues?"
"Just helping you out. You are still my Eliza Doolittle, right?"
She shrugged and smiled. "You are my Professor Higgins. He was an idiot too."
"What?" He couldn't believe she just called him an idiot, to his face. Then again, he was restrained, really well. He wondered how the hell she tied those knots.
"He was going to let Eliza marry another man when he was clearly in love with her himself."
He smiled then. She'd been thinking about them too. "But she came back and saved him from his lonely life."
She smiled back. "Is that why you paid that stripper?"
Shit, he thought. He didn't want to relive that night. "I was playing Higgins, yes. I didn't know Morelli was going to be there, but I knew you were. And I knew the guy was dangerous. So I was just there to help you in case it got out of hand." She didn't seem to like that, but sighed and nodded for him to continue. "I saw them acting like idiots and thought it would be entertaining to get him on the stage. So I paid the girl to bring him up there and mess with him. I did not ask her to do what she did and I never expected him to act like he did."
"I didn't find it entertaining at all," she said with a hard look. "How much did you pay her?"
"A thousand bucks."
Her eyes widened. "That didn't include sex, did it?"
God, no. He enjoyed messing with Morelli, but buying him sex? That was extreme, even for him. "No. Why?"
"I found them together, in his bed."
He didn't know what to think. It hurt him to think she jumped out of his bed and ran to Morelli, but he hadn't given her any reason not to. He sent her back to him time and time again. "I'm sorry for my part in all this."
She rolled her eyes. "The forty bouquets of flowers may have made that point for you." He smiled at her. "Thank you, by the way."
"I'm glad you liked them."
"Not just for the flowers, but for opening my eyes. I finally saw his true colors, and it was before I made a huge mistake."
"Babe," he said softly. He didn't want to be thanked for what he did.
"It also made me see what I wanted. It made me notice the things that I value. It made me want to go after my dreams."
He closed his eyes and took a shuddering breath. "Babe?"
"You have no idea how much I missed you. I had to fight myself everyday not to give in and call you or stop by to see you. I realized how much I want to be with you. I love you, Ranger. I have for so long. I know you don't think we can have a relationship, or whatever, but I think we can. Will you please think about giving us a chance?"
"I haven't thought about anything else," he told her. "I love you too."
She smiled and crawled on top of him, then leaned down to kiss his lips. "Will you go on a date with me?" she whispered.
He laughed then. "Yes. I'd be honored to go on a date with you."
"These ropes seem a little excessive now," she said with a frown. "I was expecting a fight."
He lifted an eyebrow at her and grinned. "Were you planning to torture me until I agreed to date you?"
She snorted, "That would have been futile." They both knew she had no stomach for torture and his threshold was way too high for her to break him anyway. She shook her head as she reached for the rope.
"Not so fast," Ranger interrupted. "Since you already have me here, maybe you could try a little of your torture techniques on me."
"Are you serious?"
"Babe," he smiled. "I always told you that I'd let you drive in bed."
She smiled widely and grasped the sides of the dress shirt he wore. She yanked hard and pulled the buttons loose, before spreading it open over his bare chest. She reached over to the night stand, where the cake waited, and dipped her finger into the buttercream frosting. She spread it over his nipples as she looked into his dark eyes. Then she dipped her head and traced her tongue over the same spot. "Mmm," she moaned. "I love this frosting." Then she sucked the nipple into her mouth and nibbled and licked until it was clean.
She repeated the process over and over until he was lifting his hips to rub against her. She scooted down and opened his pants. She looked down at his huge dick and licked her lips. It definitely needed some frosting. She spread the white frosting over his dark skin and couldn't wait to taste it. It looked delicious, like a swirl ice cream or something. She took it in her mouth and moaned in delight.
He grabbed her hair and moaned loudly. "Hey! How'd you get out of the ropes?"
He smiled to himself. That was easy, Tank put the knots against the insides of his fingers. "Babe," he answered as he pulled her up the bed and flipped them over.
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They laid in a breathless heap, tangled together happily. He leaned over and licked some of the remaining frosting from her neck, making her squirm beneath him. "I love this cake," he growled as he hardened against her hip again.
She had to agree, best thirty bucks she ever spent.
**Follow along for Stephanie's chapter coming on October 12th. Thanks everyone.**